#subordination

The Badminton brothers possess characteristics associated with hegemonic masculinity,* the dominant form of masculinity within the gender hierarchy of most Western societies. They present as heterosexual, white, non-femme, physical, ambitious, upholding of patriarchy, and of a dominant class. They expect to be life’s winners.

Stede is in a binary opposition as subordinate masculine*, aligned with feminine identities and behaviours, and viewed as inferior to the dominant form of masculinity.

For Chauncey, if Stede has to exist at all, he needs to do so in a way that reinforces the dominance of Chauncey’s hegemonic masculinity. Stede should be an example of what not to be; and a key part is he must be seen to fail.

That Stede appears ‘unscathed’ is Chauncey’s pressing issue.

Stede’s antinormative gender presentation others him as ‘not a human’, and therefore not worthy of a fulfilling life. He must be destroyed if he keeps succeeding rather than suffering, and being a destroyer of ‘beautiful things’.

Stede can be allowed to exist, but only as subordinate to, or to die at the hands of someone such as Nigel, who upholds white patriarchal hegemony. For Nigel to die at the hands of Stede subverts the natural gender order underpinning colonialism and empire.

Stede’s failure as the male head of a family reinforced by the Christian institution underpinning Western civilisation, must see him cast out to ruin by social rejection and sanction; not run away through his own agency to build a new community as a subversive pirate captain on a ship full of gender nonconforming queer folk.

And Stede should die at the hands of Blackbeard, or learn correct masculine behaviours through instruction; he shouldn’t befriend and infect Blackbeard with his gender monstrosity.

Stede challenges and destroys beautiful things, the grand narratives colonialism is built upon - white patriarchal empire, heteronormative families, hegemonic masculinity - three images which flash before Stede’s eyes as Chauncey berates him. According to Chauncey, Stede is unscathed by his anti-normative behaviours which destroy ‘beauty’ or ‘correct living’, subverting everything Chauncey believes about a superior masculine identity, and the culture that places him upon that pedestal. And that terrifies Chauncey.

Stede, of course, isn’t unscathed. He is utterly broken by not being able to live up to the masculine ideals of Western culture. To his mind, he failed at being Badminton-adjacent like other boys at school, and was therefore unfit to be part of the white ruling classes as an adult, having just ‘lucked it’. He failed as a husband within a heteronormative marriage. And he failed by ‘infecting’ Blackbeard with the plague of his femmeness.

Stede it could be argued is the one damaged by the things Chauncey calls beautiful**, but it’s Stede’s masculine identity which wins through. And it is actually much more fluid than simply aligning with the subordinate. It’s ascribing to fixed binary stereotypes of masculinity as greater or lesser which is damaging. Stede’s masculinity is many nuanced things on any given day.

Stede offers an alternative for both himself and Ed, which is safe, emotionally rewarding, and allows space to explore gender expression. Though neither is unscathed by their experiences with hegemonic masculinity, Stede and Ed can recover, and their story makes it hopeful others can too.

*Reference to Connell’s gender order theory, one framework within gender discourse, and certainly not definitive

I have received a couple of messages by men who call themselves misogynistic. I'm not that thrilled by actual misogyny, but as the messages themselves were polite and did not ask for anything haram I answered them truthfully.

There seems to be a concept that women are somehow inferior to men - in the world, and in Islam especially.

Just for the record. I am not inferior to my husband or any other man. My worth before Allah is not determined by the sex I was born with, but only with the way I live my life,

Yes, I am under my husband's authority in a lot of things, he gets to decide some things which I don't, but I am not inferior.

I am his subordinate, meaning that in the hierarchy in our family I am below him. Yes, there is a hierarchy in our family - just like in a company where a department head is still subordinate to the CEO, but by no means inferior.

Being subordinate also does not mean being less competent. Like a worker is often (probably almost always) more competent in doing his job than the CEO would be doing the same work, I am not less competent than Hasan. In fact there are many areas where I am better than him, but that does not invalidate the hierarchy that we all need to respect.

The fact that this hierarchy is within our family also implies, that I am not subordinate to any man other than my husband - which in fact could be haram and which was one of the reasons I became a fulltime housewife.

The hierarchy in our household is: 1) Allah 2) my husband 3) me 4) our children

I abdicate, you take control

Blame @marndraws for this who recommended the song At Your Command - Abdication Re:Vision by Informatik to me

(click for better quality)

³ᵈ ᵇᵃˢᵉ ᶠᶤᵍᵘʳᵉ ᵘˢᵉᵈ ᶠᵒʳ ᶜᵒᶰᶰᵒʳ ᵇʸ ˡᵉˣᵃᵏᶤᶰᵉˢˢ ᵒᶰ ʳᵉᶰᵈᵉʳᵒˢᶤᵗʸ

first posted in facebook april 11, 2023

robert rauschenberg -- "estate" (1963)

"i think a picture is more like the real world when it is made out of the real world" ... robert rauschenberg

"estate sei calda come i baci che ho perduto sei piena di un amore che è passato che il cuore mio vorrebbe cancellar

estate il sole che ogni giorno ci scaldava che splendidi tramonti dipingeva adesso brucia solo con furor

tornerà un altro inverno cadranno mille petali di rose la neve coprirà tutte le cose e forse un po' di pace tornerà

estate che ha dato il suo profumo ad ogni fiore l'estate che ha creato il nostro amore per farmi poi morire di dolor" ... bruno martino

"i didn't want painting to be simply an act of emphasizing one color to do something to another color, like using red to intensify green, because that would imply some subordination of red" ... robert rauschenberg

Taste of submission