#stone cold

Bad media is a treasure trove and I feel bad for anyone who misses out on it. There is a movie starring Whoopie Goldberg as a cyborg who has to work with a dinosaur to solve a murder. There is a movie where a priest gets shotgun blasted mid baptism by a group of crazy nazi bikers led by Lance Henrikson. There is a movie where a man dies to a frisbee laced with razor blades and in that same movie a snake explodes from a toilet. There is a movie where a group of taekwondo-trained dudes who are 100% all in a gay poly group have to fight motorcycling ninjas while they sideline as a ripoff of The Village People that sings about friendship and defeating said ninjas, but they also don't want you to think they're gay.

As much as I adore well-written stories and admire them, I often find the stories I think about the most are the ones that COULD have been well-written; when the pieces are all there to create a truly wonderful story in the right hands, but, for whatever reason, the end result is a story that just falls flat. It can be because of external factors such as executives making decisions that just completely butcher the original creator's vision, or it can be because of the creator's own folly, but I am always so much more interested in the "what-if".