“I got another hour if you wanna stay,”

“I’m sweating whisky, it’s gonna be a rough morning,”

“I’m super fat because I’m having a baby. It’s yours by the way, is this an okay time?”

“I’ve been better,”

“I think I did way more burpees than you,”

“Come over here and say that to my face,”

“You’re too far away, I can’t get up,”

“I have a meeting to show up to,”

“This oven's faulty, we’ll buy a cake,”

“Look, I understand the need for privacy when it comes to your health,”

“Do you have any incredibly unhelpful advice for me?”

“This. . . this just wasn’t the plan,”

“Live is what happens when you screw up your plans,”

“I suggest you learn from your mistakes,”

“Don’t try to fix what isn’t broken,”

“Some days the job breaks you,”

“I remembered where you hide your key. I hope it’s okay that I crashed here,”

“I’m making breakfast chili,”

“It’s getting late, can you stay over?”

“I don’t want time, I want to work, I need to work,”

“You’re not gonna cry on me are you?”

“I’m bored, entertain me,”

“Whatever favor you need, I’m saying no,”

“I see what you’re doing here,”

“He’s great to me, I married a great guy,”

“It’s a date, you like dates, it’s a party, you like parties, I’ll be there, you like me,”

“You’re mean when you’re broken hearted,”

“I still can’t believe that this stuff is legal,”

“I didn’t come here to have you pity me,”

“Are you always this condescending?”

“Tecnically I’m supposed to be at work,”

“Stop trying to protect me,”

“What fresh hell is this?”

“Can I move in with you when I get fired?”

“Why are you acting like you didn’t get picked for prom king?”

“This is why women shouldn’t date men,”

“I need to see your badge before I open the door,”

“Why aren’t you at work?”

“Why are you here?”

“It’s so good to see you, it’s been so long,”

“I broke a wineglass,”

“Beer later this week?”

“So uh, what’s up with you and your dad?”

“It was just some stupid dare okay?”

“That news that you watch everyday, is designed to terrify you. Because if it terrifies you, you drink more, you smoke more, you take more prescription drugs, and that financially benefits the same people who program the news, and yes there are bad people out there, with a crazy number of guns, but there are good people too,”

“I know what you’re doing, and it’s not cute,”

“Look, sluts have all the fun, I am pro slut,”

“I was driving by, thought you might need help,”

“You and I have different definitions of nothing,”

“What are you drinking?”

“It all comes back to you,”

“What happened in San Diego?"

“She asked me if I was still in love with my ex, and I said yes,”

“Yeah, that’s not good,”

“Spicy and sweet, like you,”

“You had one job,”

“I swear to god, you start treating me like I’m dying, I’ll kill you,”

“Sit tight, help is already on the way,”

“Maybe I can hotwire it,”

“Are you judging me?”

“I’m not trying to judge you, I just don’t get how you moved on,”

“You wanna know the secret? You just, I don’t know you feel it all the way. You cry, you whale, you write bad poems, and you sob so hard you puke. You rage at the gods, and you scream into your pillow, and you cry so hard you’re knees buckle under you, and you cry so hard you think you’re gonna collapse, and then something reminds you of how funny they could be, so you start to laugh and then, you laugh so hard you need to cry some more, so I don’t know, the secret is to let it out for as long and often as you feel like it. It’s when you fight grief, that’s when it lingers,"

“Do you want me to ask my lover if he’s got any hot doctor friends?”

“Your tongue has been in my lough, I think that puts us on a first name basis,”

“I didn’t mean to hurt you,”

“Hasn’t it been long enough? Can’t we just be friends again?”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know how to handle it,”

“Just admit that you felt it too,”

“Admit that I’m not making this up, that this isn’t a figment of my imagination,”

“Don’t die on me. I don’t wanna do this life without you,”

“I see why you like this place so much,”

“This was not your fault, this was not anybody’s fault,”

“You’re calling me a slut?”

“Everytime I try to believe that there’s some justice, some grandplan, life proves me wrong,”

“Why are you crying?”

“You did great work today,”

“We should try and get some sleep,”

“I think it’s time for us to stop,”