#stargazing

“I’ve never felt like this about anyone before, I don't wanna scare him away y’know? it took us so long to even start dating,” you sigh into your phone. It’s quiet as the person on the other line responds, he can’t quite make out what they’re saying, whatever it is makes you let out a breathy chuckle.

“I mean we already said ‘I love you’ and I do but I don't know this feels like it's more than love,” you chew on your bottom lip, heartpounding as the word sits on the tip of your tongue. You hesitate, playing with the strings of his hoodie you were wearing, smiling as you pictured your lover sleeping soundly in the bedroom. 

“is it insane to say I feel like he’s my soulmate?” you smile, practically kicking your feet as you speak the words. Xavier feels his head spin, his mouth dries up as his heart beats harder against his chest.

Soulmate.

Xavier regains his bearings too late, a flash of light already making your head turn to where he was. His cheeks are flushed, ears red and hands shaking slightly as he tries to compose himself, puppy eyes ready to go in case you were mad at him for eavesdropping.

“Xavier? Is that you? Hold on, I think I left the kitchen light on,” you mumble, kicking the blanket off your legs before coming face to face with your glowing boyfriend, golden specks fluttering around him and encompassing the two of you. 

His plan on fawning goes out the window when he sees you, dressed in his hoodie and your hair slightly messy from your actions with him before the phone call.

“My star please hang up,” Xavier breathes out, trying to steady his hands as he reaches out for your waist.

“I’ll call you later, bye,” you rush out, barely ending the call as Xavier’s lips meet yours. you can’t stop the smile on your lips as he deeps the kiss, pulling you closer to his body. “What’s gotten into you?”

“Do you mean it?” his voice is strained, grip tightening around you as you stare up at him in confusion. “What you said on the phone, were you talking about me?” the golden orbs around you flicker, their intensity lowering as you stare at your lover in silence. 

it takes you a moment for everything to click in your mind, eavesdropping little-

“If it's not me then who? I promise I can be better, I’ll do anything-” he rambles, his grip on you tightening possessively. You cut him off with your lips on his, ignoring the way your teeth clash initially, smiling when he whines softly into the kiss. You relish in the way he holds you closer to him. When you pull away his eyes are dark and pupils wide, you giggle at the way his eyes flutter open. 

“I was talking about you, you're the only one for me” you smile up at him, the lights in your apartment flicker, the love of your life glows brighter before you. Xavier pulls you closer to him, face buried in the crook of your neck, stomach flipping as the smell of his laundry detergent mixes with your perfume.

“Say it,” he breathes against your neck, “I wanna hear you say it.”

“You're my soulmate, Xavier," you whisper out, like it's a secret only meant to be heard between the two of you and the four walls of his apartment. “I only want you.”

His grip tightens around you for a second, his warm breath fans over your neck before he presses wet kisses to the skin, humming when he feels your knees buckle as he bites down softly.

“My star,” he mumbles between kisses, “you’re my everything,” he makes his way up your neck, "mine in every lifetime,” a kiss to your jaw. His lips hover over yours for a second, you can feel his breath fanning over you, eyes half lidded, you look at him through your lashes. “I’ll find you no matter what, it'll always be you, my soulmate.”

Xavier's words make your heart stutter and mind melt, closing the distance between you as your lips move passionately against his, hands grasping at the hair at the nape of his neck, smiling when he moans as you tug softly. 

“I love you, starboy,” you mumble between messy kisses, "you're only mine, right?”

Xavier whimpers at your words, the sound of a lightbulb shattering makes you pull away. His calloused hand is quick to find your cheek, gently redirecting you back to him. “I’m all yours,” he breathes out, voice hoarse, “and you’re all mine starlight.”

“Don’t think you're off the hook for eavesdropping," you say against his lips, biting at his bottom lip softly before pulling away. Xavier immediately flashes you a small pout with wide eyes and angled brows. You force yourself to look away, feeling your resolve leave your body much too quickly. “Dont look at me like that,” you mumble. 

“Can’t I look at my soulmate?” his voice is soft as ever, you can't stop your head from turning to look at him, wide sapphire eyes staring back at you.

You were a goner, and Xavier knew it, but he wasn’t much better.

ZAYNE !

“Jus’ one more drink!” you slur out, stumbling against your boyfriend and he leads you out of the bar, shaking his head at your feeble attempts to break free of his grasp.

“Darling, one more drink and you’ll throw up in my car like last time,” his voice is gentle, slowly leading you to his car as you wave goodbye to your friends reluctantly.

There’s a small pout on your lips as he buckled you in, kissing your temple before closing the door and sliding in the driver's seat. He'd already queue’d your playlist, a small smile on his lips as you sang your little heart out.

There's a pause before the next song blares through his car's speakers, you hum along before turning the volume down, suddenly turning to your lover and staring at him intently. Zayne glances at you a couple times, raising a brow as he bites back a smile at your attempt to look serious (your body sways back and forth and a small smile plays on your lips.)

“I have something like serious business I have to say to you,” you fumble out, watching as Zayne juggles glancing at you and the empty road ahead.

“Okay, go on my love,” he says, voice as steady as ever. It makes your knees weaker than they were already, your heart thumps loudly against your chest as you muster up the remaining liquid courage in your veins.

“Nevermind,” you chicken out, leaning into the plush passenger seat and staring at your  boyfriend with half lidded eyes. 

“What is it? You can tell me,” he pushes slightly, hazel eyes looking at you softly, it makes your stomach flutter. 

“What if you don't feel the same?” you pout, eyes glossing over and bottom lip wobbling the tiniest bit. 

The words have Zayne's grip on the steering wheel tightening, the brakes squealing as he comes to an abrupt halt on the side of the road, parking the car and turning his hazards on before looking at you with concerned eyes.

“Do you think I don't love you?” His words are frantic and desperate, your drunken mind misinterprets his tone, pouting as your shoulders deflate.

“No I know you love me it's just-” you mumble, already shifting your body to face the window. Zayne doesn’t let you, his usual composure falling to pieces as he reaches across the center console to have you face him, hazel eyes searching yours, pupils blown wide. 

“You can tell me anything, darling,” he breathes out, “will you please tell me?”

The softness in his voice makes your inebriated resolve fall apart, your eyes stare at his lips for a moment before refocusing on your confession at hand. 

“I feel like you're my soulmate” you mumble, eyes slowly focusing from his eyes back down to his pink lips. 

Zayne feels his heart skip a beat, hat creeping up his cheeks as he catches the way you stare at him with pure want. 

“Darling, I know you are my soulmate,” he confesses, memorizing the way your eyes widen and sparkle, the smallest gasp leaving your lips. 

“Zayne-” your words are cut off by him pressing his lips to yours, ignoring the bitter taste of alcohol on your lips as his tongue swipes your bottom lip. A small whine leaves your lips as he pulls away, he has the slightest smirk on his lips when you pull him back by the collar of his button up. Your mouths move together in sync, you can taste the mint left behind from the gum he was chewing while he waited for you. Zayne lets his hands cup your cheeks, only pulling away when he feels your hand snaking to his thigh. 

“Let's get home first, okay?” He offers, placing a gentle kiss to your nose when you reluctantly agree.

You're asleep by the time he parks the car in the garage, carrying you to bed and helping you out of your clothes, pressing soft kisses to your face as he does your skincare for you. He tries to ignore the blush on his cheeks as you compliment him between giggles. 

“Do I tell you how hot you are? I need to tell you more,” you mumble, Zayne struggles to keep his composure, finishing the final step before finally carrying you to bed. 

“Do I tell you how gorgeous you are? How stunning and brilliant you are?” He hums, turning the compliments on you, he smiles as you turn away in embarrassment. He gently repositions you so that you're facing him, “I need to tell my soulmate I love them more, don't I?” He pauses for a second, letting you try to push away from him, only to come back immediately. He presses a feathery kiss to the top of your head. “I love you.”

“You mean it?” you mumble against his chest, hands intertwined with his.

Zayne feels his heart clench at your vulnerable words, “I would never lie to you about this. You're the only one for me, we are meant to be together in this life and the next.” His serious tone is a contrast to the gentle look in his eyes.

You can’t stop the giggles leaving your mouth, nuzzling your warm face into his neck and placing a flurry of kisses on his neck.

“I love you,” you sigh out, eyelids heavy as the alcohol takes its toll on your body.

“I love you more,” Zayne whispers, a small smile on his lips as your breathing evens out. He smooths your hair down, arms holding you a little tighter, “my soulmate.”

RAFAYEL !

The thought occurred to you during a fleeting moment as he walked hand in hand with you from the beach, laughter being carried by the ocean breeze.

Your fond eyes took in his every feature, every mole and noise he made, your chest growing warm. My Rafayel. My boyfriend. My soulmate.

You falter slightly as the last word weighs heavy in your mind. There isn’t much of an opportunity for you to linger on the word, Rafayel is quick to sweep you off your feet and carry you into the house bridal style, smiling sweetly down at you before kissing your cheek.

“What does my darling lover wish to eat tonight?” His voice is airy and playful as he plops the two of you on the couch, brushing your hair behind your ear. He relishes in the way you squirm, the way you avert your gaze out of bashfulness.

“Whatever my handsome fishie desires” you reply back, wiggling out of his arms and standing, “I’m gonna go shower.” 

Soulmate. The word rattles around in your head, a million thoughts racing in your mind as the water hits your skin. You stare at the ornate tile long enough for the design to be seared into your eyes.

A knock at the door makes you jump, soap effectively getting in your eye. “fuck,” you mumble softly, quickly rinsing the suds off your body, “what is it?” You call out, lowering the water pressure to hear better.

“You okay cutie? It’s been a while,” Rafayel's concern makes your stomach twist.

“I’ll be out in a minute!”

Rafayel notices your subtle change in attitude, watching the way you stare at him more intently, the way you hold back your affections for him. He frowns when he catches you stopping your arm from wrapping around his waist as he stands in the kitchen with you.

He doesn’t say anything, not yet.

That was two days ago, and now Rafayel feels like he’s going to die soon if he doesn’t feel the warmth of your skin on his. He’d gotten out of bed before you this morning, telling you he wouldn’t be back until early evening under the guise of buying new paints at the market. He tried his best to hide his frown when he saw how relieved you looked to be alone for the day.

You let out a sigh of relief when the front door clicked shut, giving it two minutes before dialing your best friend's number.

“I’m in a crisis and I need your help,” you rushed out as soon as she answered. You were too jittery to stay still, kicking off the blanket and pacing around the room.

“You know Rafayel? the handsome artist that I’m dating and am head over heels for?” you ramble, walking out of the room and into the hallway, staring at the art pieces for a second before continuing your panicked walk.

“Yeah so what do I do if I think he’s my soulmate?” the words leave your mouth conveniently as the front door opens, your wide eyes meet the shocked dual chrome ones of your boyfriend.

“- forgot my wallet,” the words die on his tongue as he processes the words he wasn't meant to hear. Neither of you move, staring at each other like fish out of water. 

“Cutie please tell me you’re talking about me or this is going to get really awkward really fast,” he breaks the silence first, watching as you quickly hang up the phone.

“Did you hear that?” part of you hopes he didn’t, the other part of you wonders what he’ll say.

“Hear the love of my life call me their soulmate? Yeah I heard that part,” he says, closing the front door behind him, he takes two tentative steps towards you, gauging your reaction. Your face flushes at his words.

You take a step towards him, helping close the distance. Rafayel doesn’t hesitate to take a mile when you give him an inch, arm looping around your waist and pulling you against him.

“You were talking about me, right?” His voice is a lower octave and it makes goosebumps rise on your skin.

“maybe,” you breathe out, eyes frantically searching his own, “do you feel the same?”

Rafayel feels his skin ignite as your hands brush over the skin of his cheek, his eyes flutter shut as he leans into your touch. “How could I not feel the same when you’re so perfect for me? of course I think you’re my soulmate. You're my muse and inspiration, the reason I live.” He punctuates each point with a kiss to your hand, then your wrist.

“My beautiful soulmate,” he smiles, watching as you break into a grin. He presses a kiss to your neck, breathy giggles between kisses up your neck and jaw before finally capturing your lips in his. “Is that why you’ve been distant? you were scared I didn’t feel the same?”

Rafayel feels you tense at his words, relaxing when he places another kiss on your cheek. “You noticed that?” You cringe, nose scrunching as he pulls away from you.

“I live to love you and you think I wouldn’t notice when you pulled away?” you laugh at the incredulous look on his face, burying your face in the crook of his neck as he carries you to the couch. He feels you mumble a ‘sorry’ against his skin, kissing him softly before looking up.

“Don't you have to go buy some paint?” you ask, running your fingers through his purple strands before focusing on his eyes again.

“Oh that was a lie,” he says plainly, “was gonna buy you that diamond bracelet you wanted because I thought you were mad at me.” Your jaw drops, he continues. “But now we can go pick something out together, to celebrate our soulmate-ism!” he grins.

Rafayel doesn’t let you protest, shutting you up with a kiss on the lips every time you try and argue. You give in eventually, with the two of you coming back with matching bracelets whose price tag made your vision blur (Rafayel didn’t bat an eye as he handed over his card).

SYLUS !

It was your fault for thinking Mephisto would actually keep a secret from his creator. You were too distracted by the prospect of finally catching up with friends as you hurriedly kissed Sylus goodbye while he was half asleep, hopping on your bike and heading towards Linkon. you hadn’t noticed the mechanical crow following you in plain sight, the flutter of his wings masked by your friends voices as you hugged them all.

The three of you sat at a table outside, making small talk before ordering and setting menus aside. You caught up on the usual, work, hobbies, gossip, the shows you all watched.

“Okay let’s cut to the chase, this Sylus guy,” your friend waggles her brows at you, you scoff, pushing her gently and hoping they think the flush on your cheeks is due to the sun and not because of the mention of your lover.

“No we’re really good,” you smile, biting your bottom lip, “I really, really love him and he’s the sweetest ever, i don’t know i think-” you cut yourself off, heart pounding as you stare at your friends expectant faces.

“Are you serious?”

“Oh my god!”

“I think he’s the one, I feel like he’s my soulmate,” you breathe out, laughing when your friends squeal in excitement.

Mephisto isn’t perfect, his feathers puff up at your confession and the poor bird can’t stop the squawk of excitement that leaves him. You whip your head around at the sound, jaw dropping when you see him perched on a branch of the tree besides you. Your narrowed eyes are enough to keep the crow grounded in place.

Two hours later you part ways with your friends, double checking they were out of sight before snatching Mephisto out of the tree he was in, a concerned ‘caw’ leaving his beak when you manhandle him.

“You can not tell Sylus what I said here today, okay?” your breathing is panicked as you look around, “the last thing I want is to scare him off because im in too deep too quickly or he doesn’t feel the same or-” your grip on the bird loosens, he doesn’t move, instead he nuzzles his head to your hand.

“I don't wanna mess this up, promise me you won’t tell him, promise me Mephie?” the bird lets out a soft ‘caw.’ You smile at him, placing a kiss to the top of his head before releasing him. “Okay, let’s go home then.”

Mephisto arrives at the base before you do, seeing as you stopped quickly at the grocery store, having misplaced your faith in the corvid; truly believing he would stay true to his caw and keep a secret from his father maker. You walk in the front door, with a smile on your face, skipping to the kitchen and setting down the snacks you’d bought.

“Did you have a good time, sweetie?” Sylus’ deep voice makes you turn with a smile, your eyes sparkling as you nod quickly. Sylus doesn’t waste time, pushing himself off the wall he was leaning on and snaking his arms around your waist. “Did you happen to talk about me?” There’s a lilt to his voice, you hum softly.

“Maybe, maybe not,” you scrunch your nose, kissing his lips before attempting to break free of his grasp, "I need to put the ice cream in the fridge before it melts!” you protest, barely putting an effort to leave his arms.

“I’m sure as soulmates we’ll have plenty more ice cream in our lives, no?” Your movements still as the words process in your mind, eyes going wide and stomach dropping.

“That fucking bird!” you gasp out, panic rising in your chest, “I’m sorry I just- we can take a step back if you want-” you ramble, not noticing Sylus’ brows furrowing at your words as you attempt to backtrack on the words you very obviously meant.

“Did you not mean it?” His deep voice is steady, his grip on you hasn’t faltered, still holding you close to him. Your eyes meet his, trying to clue yourself in on his emotions.

“I did- I do, but I don't wanna scare you off,” you admit. Your heart is racing, the sound of it beating loudly in your ears masks Sylus' heart beating just as loudly. You avert your gaze from his, focusing on the frayed edges of his old t-shirt.

“You couldn’t scare me off even if you tried, kitten,” he mumbles, a soft smile replacing his teasing smirk. He leans down, stopping inches from your lips before whispering, “for the record I told mephisto you were my soulmate the day I met you.”

His words make your eyes dart from his shirt to his eyes. Sylus forces himself to mask his amusement at your surprised look. You open your mouth to reply, but he doesn’t give you a chance to get a word out as he crashes his lips to yours, allowing you to lead the kiss. Your head spins as your lips move against his, hands gripping the fabric of his shirt, leaning into him until the two of you are stumbling backwards.

Your lips only disconnect when you gasp for air, Sylus’ back pressed against the wall as he watches you fondly. “If I had known I was gonna get this reaction I would’ve told you I thought you were my soulmate sooner,” he teases, you squint your eyes at him, pouting slightly.

“Don't make fun of me, I was scared!” you press your forehead against his chest, eyes closing as you listen to his racing heart.

Sylus moves his hand to fix your hair, coming to rest on your cheek before snaking to your chin and gently lifting it so you face him.

“You don’t need to be scared to tell me anything, okay? our souls are made up of each other,” his gaze softens, your knees buckle.

“I love you,” you breathe out, pressing your lips to his once more.

“What about the ice cream?” he mumbles against your lips.

“Fuck the ice cream.”

Sylus doesn’t stop the rumble of laughter in his chest as he sweeps you off your feet and carries you to the bedroom.

CALEB !

“I wanna try this” you tilt your screen to Caleb, he watches the video for a moment before turning to look at you. 

“You don’t like that kind of food,” he says casually, turning back to the tv as you furrow your brows at him. 

“How would you know? I’ve never even tried it,” you huff, tapping the post and checking where the store was located. 

“Pips, trust me you won't like it, you're gonna complain about the texture of it,” the cocky smile on his face made you frown, shaking your head. 

“Look! They have a place here in Skyhaven, let's go try it!” 

One bite was all it took, your face falling after the first bite, entire body freezing. 

“Does it taste good?” Caleb smiles, taking a sip from the broth of the ramen he got, your favorite kind. 

“Mhm, yummy” you cringe, forcing yourself to chew and swallow harshly. You’d be damned if Caleb was right for the nth time about you. 

“Can I try it? You can have some of mine too,” he smiles, you immediately nod at the opportunity. Caleb switches your plates quickly, shaking his head as he watches you hum happily at the first spoonful of noodles. You know what he’s doing, thankful as he spares your pride while he finishes off your food. 

It happens again when you show him a t- shirt online you wanna order, “it's a limited time drop! I need to get this,” you muse, staring at the ‘add to cart’ button. 

“Baby you don't even like any of those color ways, you're never gonna wear it,” he reasons, pulling you into his lap and kissing the pout on your lips. 

“Yes I will,” you bite back. 

“Using it as a sleeping shirt doesn't count.”

You order the shirt anyway, wearing out on a date out of spite. It turns into a sleeping shirt after that. 

It’s not one way though, with you picking up any supplies or necessities for his house in Skyhaven, he catches you putting them away. 

“I knew I was forgetting to do something, I’m sorry baby,” he sighs, placing a kiss on your cheek, his colonel uniform still on as he melts into your touch. 

“It’s okay, I knew you’d forget,” you tease, “I also got you new socks, throw away those ripped ones you have.” Caleb lights up at your words, a flurry of wet kisses landing on your face before you can push him away. 

Life felt easy with Caleb, the two of you moving in sync around the house, knowing exactly what the other needed without having to say a word. 

You hand him the seasonings he needs as he looks around your kitchen, you rearrange it before he comes over the next time, mirroring the kitchen in skyhaven, he doesnt struggle to find the salt anymore.

Caleb gives you half of his closet and drawers, filling it with clothes you'd left behind previously, organizing it and folding your clothing in the way he knows you like. He buys the detergent and softener you like, throwing his away after you complained that it smelled weird. 

It’s not in any grand gestures he does, not in the grand bouquet of flowers he brings you when he’s been gone on a mission for weeks. It’s not when he’s pressing you against the wall, pinning your wrists above your head and making you writhe and come undone beneath him. 

No, the realization comes to you in bits and pieces. 

It comes to you when he hands you a dandelion as the two of you stroll through the city, “make a wish,” he grins, watching as you close your eyes and blow. He does the same with his, “I wished for us to always be together.” You roll your eyes at him, corny, “they say if you say your wish out loud it never comes true,” you laugh as his face falls, frantically searching for another dandelion. 

It’s when he helps you brush your teeth after a night out, wiping your makeup off gently and acting as your jester when you're upset. It’s when you're whispering sweet nothings to each other in bed, hushed giggles as if you're scared of getting caught up past your bedtime. It's when he comes to you with wet lashes, baring his heart to you and confessing his insecurities, leaning into your touch as you kiss away his worries, your words wrapping around his heart in a comforting embrace. 

Maybe you've always known, but could never place a word to it. As you sit under the stars, head on his chest as you listen to his heartbeat and the rumble of his deep voice as he rattles off constellations to you. 

“Do you believe in soulmates, Caleb?” You cut him off, he doesn't mind. You hear his heartbeat increase, both of you still stare at the stars above you. 

“I do, do you pips?” His voice wavers slightly, gaze focusing on you, he watches as your lips twitch into a smile. You take a deep breath before sitting up and moving next to him. 

“I think I didn't at first, I always thought it was silly,” you laugh, eyes catching a moving star, you turn to Caleb and continue. “But I don't think there’s any other way to describe what you are to me,” you shrug, “I love you too much for it to not bleed into our destiny.”

Caleb feels the world around him stop, his mouth falls open slightly at your words. You smile at him sweetly, like you didn’t just put poets to shame. 

“You’re the reason I believe in soulmates” he finally says, “from the moment we met I knew I was destined to be yours, and you mine.”

Your face flushes at his words, a small squeak leaves you when he pulls you onto his lap, staring at you for a second before pressing his lips to yours. Caleb’s grip on you is tight, fingers digging into the plush of your waist. 

“I love you so much,” he mumbles between kisses. You hum in return, gasping when his grip tightens. 

“I love you, Caleb.” You smile against his lips, laughing when he bursts into a fit of bashful giggles.