The scars are there, even if no one else can see them. They linger in every moment a guy brushes you off, in the hollow smile you force when you know it's not real. You feel the sting in every glance that sizes you up like you’re a prize to be won rather than a person to know. So you’ve built your walls, layering them high and thick until nothing, no one, can break through. Not even him.

Or them.

Sam and Dean Winchester—they didn’t just walk into your life. No, they crashed into it, two forces of nature that bulldozed right through your carefully constructed defenses, leaving you exposed and vulnerable in a way you swore you’d never be again. At first, you tried to play it cool, act like they were just hunters, comrades in arms. But the months blurred together, and now you can’t even tell how long it’s been. And that scares you because losing track means losing control and losing control means letting them in.

And letting them in? That’s not an option.

Even now, you can feel their eyes on you, the weight of their presence lingering in the air like a storm cloud ready to break. Sam’s by the pool table, his lean, tall frame moving with practiced ease as he lines up shot after shot. There’s a calm to him, but it’s the kind that keeps you on edge, like he could switch in an instant and suddenly be dangerous. Then there’s Dean, perched at the bar with a half-empty beer in hand, his eyes flicking between the room and you, constantly scanning for threats, always watching. 

Always watching you.

They’re protective. It should comfort you, but it drives you insane. Because the truth is, no matter how many monsters they face, no matter how many battles they fight, they can’t protect you from what matters most. They can’t protect you from yourself.

You think back to the last hunt, to the ridiculousness of it all—a damn Cupid, of all things. The little winged freak zeroed in on you from the moment you stepped into that abandoned church, those bright, beady eyes tracking you with unnerving precision. He wasn’t cute, not like the Valentine's Day cards would have you believe. No, this thing was more like a demented cherub, armed with arrows dipped in cosmic mischief, and he had you in his crosshairs. You could feel it in the air—the tug, the weight, as though Cupid himself was hell-bent on forcing you to confront feelings you’d buried so deep even you were beginning to forget they existed. Each arrow he loosed sent your heart racing, as if you could sense the emotional mess he was trying to weave. But you dodged them all, every last one, determined not to let some glorified matchmaker unravel everything you’d worked so hard to lock away.

You're not stupid. You know precisely what the little bastard was aiming for. It’s not like you’ve been blind to the way Sam’s gaze lingers on you when he thinks you’re not paying attention, soft and curious, like he’s trying to piece you together. Or the way Dean’s jaw tightens, a flicker of possessiveness in his green eyes, whenever some random guy at a bar edges too close, his whole demeanor shifting to silent warning. You’ve been dodging these unspoken glances for months now, sidestepping their care, their questions, like someone dancing around a minefield. Because you know that once you stop moving, it’ll all explode in your face.

And you’ve had enough explosions in your life.

But there’s only so much running you can do before the inevitable catches up.

“Hey.”

Dean’s gravelly voice slices through the whirlwind of your thoughts, rough but steady, anchoring you as he slides into the seat beside you. His presence is a weight that presses into the air, solid, almost suffocating in its certainty. The chair creaks beneath him, but all you hear is the pounding of your own heartbeat, thundering in your chest.

“Are you alright?” He’s asking, but it’s more than that. It’s the question beneath the question, the one you’ve been dodging for longer than you can remember.

Your heart skips a beat—a betraying thud that echoes in the hollowness you’ve tried to keep locked down. You’d never admit it, not even to yourself, but he makes it impossible to pretend. You glance at him, careful to keep your face neutral, masking the fluttering in your chest with a look you’ve perfected over years of pretending. It’s almost second nature by now—the practiced nonchalance. But with Dean, it’s always been different.

There’s something in the way his green eyes bore into yours, piercing through the walls you’ve built brick by brick, layer by layer. It’s as though he sees right past your armor, straight into that small, fragile part of you that still aches for something real. Something more. But you can’t let him see that. You won’t. So you shove it down, hard, pushing that flicker of vulnerability back into the shadows as you lean casually into your chair. Your body language distant, closed off.

“Yeah,” you shrug, the lie slipping from your lips as easily as breathing. “Just tired. Long day.”

Dean doesn’t move, doesn’t blink, just watches you with that familiar intensity, and you know—you know—he doesn’t believe a word you’re saying. He’s seen you fight, seen you bleed, seen you crawl out of the wreckage of hunts that should’ve killed you. He’s seen you at your worst, and somehow, he still sticks around. He and Sam both do, and that’s the problem, isn’t it? They’ve gotten too close, wedged themselves into your life in ways that make it impossible for you to keep pretending.

Pretending that you don’t care.

Pretending that the way Dean looks at you doesn’t unravel something deep inside.

From across the room, you feel Sam’s eyes on you. His quiet gaze tracks the shift in the atmosphere as he casually leans his pool cue against the table and makes his way over, long strides slow but purposeful. His expression is calm and unreadable, but you see the concern in the tightness of his jaw and the subtle way his brow furrows as he joins Dean at your side.

“You’ve been quiet,” Sam says softly, folding his arms across his broad chest. There’s no judgment in his tone, just that frustrating gentleness, the kind that makes you feel seen when you’d rather stay hidden. “Is it… about earlier? With Cupid?”

The mention of Cupid sends a sharp twist through your stomach. You swallow, forcing down the surge of emotions that threatens to rise, burying it beneath layers of practiced indifference. You won’t let some stupid angel with a bow and arrow undo everything you’ve worked so hard to keep locked away. You won’t.

“I’m fine,” you snap, the words slipping out too fast, too harsh. The crack in your voice betrays you. “That was nothing. Just another hunt.”

Dean raises an eyebrow, and you can feel the weight of Sam’s stare, too, both of them pinning you with that all-too-familiar look. The one that says they’re not buying your crap, the one that makes your pulse quicken, and your chest tighten. You hate that look because it leaves you nowhere to hide.

“Bullshit.” Dean’s voice is low, steady, cutting through the silence with calm certainty. He takes a long sip from his beer, but his eyes never leave yours, and it feels like he’s peeling back every layer you’ve carefully put up to protect yourself. “You’ve been dodging that thing like it was the plague, and don’t think we didn’t notice.”

You clench your hands into fists in your lap, frustration bubbling up like a rising tide. “Look,” you say, your voice sharp, defensive. “I don’t need some magical arrow telling me how I’m supposed to feel. I’m fine the way I am.”

Sam shifts beside Dean, his arms still crossed, but you see the way the muscle in his jaw tenses, the way his hazel eyes soften as they search yours. “It’s not about what you’re supposed to feel,” he murmurs, his voice quiet but firm. “It’s about what you do feel.”

His words hit you like a punch to the gut, and for a moment, it’s all too much. The weight of their concern, the intensity of their gaze, the truth that they’re trying to force you to admit—it presses down on you until you can’t breathe. You stand up abruptly, the legs of the chair scraping loudly against the floor as you push it back. The sound is harsh, jarring in the quiet of the bar, but you barely notice.

“I don’t feel anything, okay?” you snap, the words spilling out before you can stop them. “Not for you, not for him, not for anyone. And I won’t let some winged freak tell me otherwise.”

The tension in the air thickens, suffocating, hanging between the three of you like a storm cloud ready to break. Dean stands up slowly, his movements deliberate, his face carefully neutral, but there’s something in his eyes—something raw, something that cuts deeper than you want to admit. Hurt, maybe. Disappointment. You can’t think about it. You won’t.

“Y’know,” Dean says quietly, taking a step toward you, his voice low and steady, “you keep saying that, but you don’t believe it. Not really.” He’s close now, too close, the heat of his body radiating off him in waves, and it makes your pulse spike. “You’re just scared.”

Your heart slams against your ribs, your breath catching in your throat. Fear coils tightly around your chest, but not the fear of them. No, it’s the fear of what they’re asking you to do. To let them in. To trust them. To stop running.

And running is all you know how to do.

“I’m not scared,” you whisper, but the words feel weak and empty, even to you.

Dean’s lips twitch into a small, humorless smile, his eyes softening just a fraction as he watches you. “Yeah, you are,” he says, his voice gentler now but no less intense. “And that’s okay. But maybe it’s time you stopped running from it.”

Sam steps closer, his presence steady and calm, grounding you in a way that you don’t want to admit you need. His voice is soft, full of quiet understanding, but there’s an unshakable strength beneath it. “You don’t have to do this alone, y’know,” he says. “We’re here. We always have been.”

The words sink into you, settling deep into the cracks of your carefully guarded heart, and something inside you shifts. Just a little. It’s terrifying, the idea of trusting them, of letting yourself hope, but there’s also something achingly beautiful about it. About the possibility that maybe, for once, you don’t have to be the one to leave first. That maybe, you don’t have to protect yourself from the inevitable heartbreak.

But still, the fear—the bone-deep, soul-crushing fear of opening up, of letting someone in only to be left behind again—is overwhelming and paralyzing.

“I can’t,” you breathe, your voice barely a whisper now, trembling under the weight of the truth you’re too afraid to admit. “I can’t risk it.”

Dean’s hand reaches out slowly, cautiously, like he knows one wrong move could send you running. But he doesn’t stop. His fingers, calloused from years of hunting, gently find yours, and instead of just holding your wrist, he entwines his fingers with yours, locking them together with a quiet but unspoken promise. The touch is soft yet firm, his thumb grazing the back of your hand in slow, soothing strokes, as if he’s trying to reassure you with every heartbeat. The warmth of his skin against yours sends a shiver up your spine, igniting something deep inside you, something you’ve kept buried for so long you almost forgot it was there.

You feel the weight of his presence settle over you like a blanket, heavy with meaning, but there’s nothing suffocating about it. It’s grounding, steady—safe. And yet, that safety terrifies you because it’s the kind you’ve convinced yourself you don’t deserve. But Dean, he isn’t giving you a choice. Not this time.

His other hand comes up slowly, his movements deliberate and gentle, as if he’s afraid you might bolt at any second. His palm cups your cheek, warm and rough, but his touch is tender, almost reverent. His thumb brushes across your cheekbone, wiping away a tear you didn’t realize had fallen. The simple motion cracks something inside you, and for a moment, it feels like the walls you’ve built so carefully over the years are crumbling under the weight of his touch.

"Maybe you’re not the only one taking a risk here," Dean murmurs, his voice thick with emotion, barely above a whisper. His words hang between you, heavy and raw, filled with all the things he’s never said but has always felt. His eyes search yours, and in them, you see it—the longing, the fear, the desperate hope that you’ll stay, that you’ll finally let them in. That you’ll choose them.

You feel your breath catch in your throat as his fingers tighten ever so slightly around yours, anchoring you to the moment. His thumb continues its slow, tender sweep across your cheek, and the tenderness in his gaze is enough to break your heart. This man, this infuriating, stubborn, protective man, who has fought demons and monsters and everything in between, is standing here with his heart wide open, asking you to stop running. Asking you to be with him and his brother in a way that terrifies you more than any hunt ever could.

For the first time, you feel the weight of what’s at stake—not just for you, but for him, for Sam. This isn’t just about you being afraid of getting hurt. It’s about them too, about the risk they’re taking by loving you, by wanting you to be a part of their lives. And it hits you with such force that you almost can’t breathe. They aren’t asking for your walls to come down—they’re asking to stand beside them. To hold you through the fear, through the pain, through whatever comes next.

You stare up at Dean, his hand still cradling your face like you’re something precious, and for the first time, you allow yourself to wonder—really wonder—if maybe, just maybe, you’re not the only one with something to lose.

Because you can feel it now—the risk they’re taking, the way they’re holding their breath, waiting for your answer, waiting for you to finally say yes. And in that moment, you realize that they’ve already decided. They’ve already chosen you.

It’s your turn to choose them.

Rolling over in my bed with a groan, I peeked a glance at my alarm clock sitting on my side table. 6:45am. I hated waking up early on a Saturday! With a small sigh, the covers were flung off and I stood up to stretch. The boys had been gone for about 5 days now. They had adamantly refused to let me tag along this time and as upset as I was, I understood why. They just wanted to keep me safe and if I was being honest, I was not 100% after our last hunt.

Slipping my feet into my bedroom slippers, I made my way out of my room and down the hall towards the boy’s rooms. I stopped at the first door on the right and pressed my ear against it for a moment. When I heard nothing from inside, I gently turned the knob and pushed the door open. Nothing. Pulling the door shut I made my way to Sam’s bedroom only to find nothing as well. The boys are still not home from their hunt. Now I was upset. It had been 5 days now and not once had Sam or Dean contacted me about the case. Was it going so well that they didn’t need any research done? I doubt that. Dean would do anything in the world to get out of the research.

Finally, I decided that it was way too early in the morning to be dealing with this and I made my way to the kitchen for a cup of coffee. Then I would contact the boys myself.

As I filled up the machine with water and coffee grounds, my mind drifted back to when I first met Sam and Dean. We had met when I was only 10.

You see, hunting ran in my family as well. My mother and father were hunters. When my mom found out that she was pregnant with my sister, she quit hunting and eventually so did my father. My parents eventually were able to settle down into a normal life, and two years after my sister was born, my mom found out she was pregnant with me. Fast forward several years to the night of my 10th birthday, a monster broke into my house and killed my parents and my older sister. John Winchester and his friend Bobby had been tracking the monster and they saved me before the monster could hurt me. With the monster dead, John and Bobby tried to figure out what to do with me but since I had no other family members, there was no where for me to go. Bobby took me in and raised me, along with Sam and Dean, who spent more time at Bobby’s than with their dad.

At first it took Dean a while to warm up to me. We became a lot closer when he realized that he had someone his own age to help take care of Sam. Sam and I instantly bonded over our love of books and learning. It helped that I was not nearly as tough on him as Dean sometimes was. As we got older, the three of us grew even closer when John and Bobby would take us all on hunts together. I had finally started to heal after losing my own family, because I had a new family, one who would protect each other from everything.

One day, John came back to Bobby’s place only this time, Sam wasn’t with him. John had his version of what happened, and Dean had his. I had never seen Dean so upset and heartbroken in my life. Sam had gotten into Stanford and had tried to tell his dad about it. John had instantly gotten defensive and accused Sam of not wanting to find the demon that killed Mary. They had argued and John finally told Sam to leave and never come back. My heart broke for Dean. We lost something that day, a little piece of me died as another member of my family left me.

Taking a sip of my coffee, I frowned as the memory of Sam leaving came to mind. I don’t know why I had started to reminisce about the past, but sometimes it was nice to take a little trip down memory lane, even if some of the memories weren’t always happy ones.

I had some cleaning to do around the bunker before the boys came home. If they didn’t return tonight, I was going to have to go hunt them down myself. Finishing off my coffee, I set the cup in the sink to wash later and headed back towards my bedroom so that I could change out of my pajamas. I opened up my closet and happened to glance up at the top shelf. Sitting there was my old guitar. It was the only thing I had taken from my house after that horrible night. The guitar had been my fathers. He gave it to me that night as my birthday gift along with the promise of teaching me to play.

I popped open the latches and pulled the guitar out of its case and just looked at it. It had been so long since I had last played it. Placing the strap over my head, I positioned the guitar in my lap and placed my fingers on the fret board. With just a strum or two, memories flooded back to me of teaching myself how to play up in my room at Bobby’s house. With a quick tune and some more strumming, the guitar was finally ready to play again. My fingers fell into what fell like a natural place and I strummed the E minor scale. As I strummed, a song that my mother used to sing to me as a kid came to mind.

I remember tears streaming down your face

When I said, “I’ll never let you go”

When all those shadows almost killed your light

I remember you said, “Don’t leave me here alone”

But all that’s dead and gone and passed tonight

As I sang, flashback to a rough hunt that Dean and I had been on together came to mind. It was one of our first cases without John or Bobby. We were probably about 18 years old and John was out chasing a clue towards finding the yellow eyed demon that killed Mary while Dean and I handed what was supposed to be just one or two vampires.

*flashback*

“DEAN!” I screamed as I took off in a run. John had sent us to Louisiana for a small vampire case. It was supposed to be 2 maybe 3 vamps but instead ,we found an entire nest of about 9. We had killed all but 3 vamps and as I swung my machete again, I saw Dean fighting off the leader. As I ran towards them, the third vampire came out of the shadows and sank his fangs into Dean’s neck before tearing away from him. I quickly swung my machete at the leader and beheaded him before turning and taking down the final vamp.

“You’re gonna be okay. Just hang on!” Tears ran down my cheeks as I started to panic. Thinking quickly, I pulled off my flannel and pressed it against his neck to put pressure on the wound. Blood was quickly soaking through the shirt and I was terrified. Dean was scared too; I could see it in his eyes and hear it in the way his words trembled.

“Please don’t leave me alone here.” He whispered to me. The bleeding was slowing but Dean was beginning to lose consciousness. The blood loss was taking its toll on him.

Tears kept falling as I looked at him like he was crazy.

“I’m not going to leave you here!”

“Why are you crying?” His eye lids were starting to droop, and I panicked. Shaking him I tried to keep him awake.

“Hey! Dean! You can’t fall asleep; We have to get you out of here. I’m never gonna let you go and I’m not gonna leave you here. Now get up!”

Dean grunted in pain as I helped him up off the ground. His movements were slow and sluggish, but it was only a few feet to the car. ‘Just get him in the car and then get him to the hospital’ I kept repeating it over and over until we finally arrived at the local medical center.

*end flashback*

Dean had gone into shock by the time we made it to the hospital. I could only watch as doctors rushed him away from me and into surgery. After he had been given a unit of blood, some IV fluids, and had been stitched up, I sat beside his bed that night and waited for him to wake up. I hummed this song to him in hopes that he could hear me and would wake up. When he finally did wake up, I cried in joy because I thought I had almost lost him. I couldn’t take the loss of another person.

Just close your eyes

The sun is going down

You’ll be alright

No one can hurt you now

Come morning light

You and I’ll be safe and sound

I remember when Dean and Sam lost their father. Dean had been in the hospital after another hunt had gone wrong. The three of them had been in a car accident after the hunt. I’ll never forget that phone call or the fear that filled my body when I heard what had happened. Bobby tossed his keys to me and I rushed to the hospital as fast as I could but by the time I got there, John was dead. After the boys had been discharged, they told me what had happened. Dean had been trapped outside of his body and a reaper had been after him. John sold his soul and a gun called the Colt to the yellow eyed demon that he had been hunting for so long. His soul for Dean’s life.

There was a war going on outside and only we knew what it was. As hunters, we knew about the things that go bump in the night. There was a war brewing and we were the only soldiers that could fight it.

Don’t you dare look out your window, darling,

Everything’s on fire

The war outside our door keeps raging on

Hold on to this lullaby

Even when music’s gone

Gone

After their father died, Dean and Sam told me all about the demon that their father had been hunting. They told me about their mom and how the demon had killed her and had almost killed Sam. They told me about how their Dad had gotten obsessed with finding it and everything that he had done. Although John was strict with the boys and I, he was still like a father to me. With the loss of John weighing over me, that night I locked myself in my room and just cried. I cried for the loss of John, for the loss of my family, cried with relief that Dean was safe, I just cried.

I couldn’t lose another family member. I didn’t know how much more I could take. If only I had known what the future had held for me, maybe I would have gotten out of hunting because all that was awaiting me in the future was loss and grief.

Just close your eyes

The sun is going down

You’ll be alright

No one can hurt you now

Come morning light

You and I’ll be safe and sound

I let the last chord echo thorough out the room as I trailed off on the last few words. I was started by the sound of clapping behind me and I spun around on my bed to see Sam and Dean standing in the doorway with small smiled on their faces. I instantly threw my guitar off onto the bed and ran over to give them hugs.

“Careful!” Dean warned and I jumped back before I could touch him.

“It’s okay, just bruised a bit. Just don’t hug too tight.” He chuckled out.

Gently I wrapped my arms around him before moving over to Sam. With a frown ,I pulled back gently before I shot out and smacked both of them on the back of the heads.

“Hey! What the hell!?”

Taking a step back, I put my hands on my hips and glared at both of them.

“5 days?? You couldn’t call and tell me you were alright?”

Sam looked down sheepishly and Dean suddenly found the wall interesting.

“Well?” I said, tapping my foot on the ground

“We ran into a bit of trouble on our way back.” Sam mumbled out, rubbing his hand on the back of his neck.

Sighing I let my hands fall from my hips before I looked at their faces. Looking closely, I could see that both boys had cuts and bruises on their faces.

“Come on and sit down so I can clean you up. Then you can tell me what happened.”

As the boys moved into my room and sat down on my bed, I went into the bathroom only to come out with the first aid kit from under my sink.

“Start at the beginning Sam.” I poured a small amount of peroxide onto a cotton ball and began to dab at one of the cuts on Dean’s forehead. As soon as the cotton ball made contact Dean flinched away like I had stabbed him.

“Really?” I asked in a deadpan voice.

He just crossed his arms with a huff and pouted. Staring for a moment, I broke at his pushed-out lip and started giggling. Instantly he broke into a grin at his successful attempt at making me laugh.

“Alright, alright.” I giggled out. “Tell me what happened.” I began to gently push on dean’s ribs to make sure that nothing was broken before moving over to check Sam.

“We got caught by the police.” Sam mumbled out.

“What was that?”

“I said, we got caught by the cops!”

I just rolled my eyes and kept quiet while they shared their story of what happened. I finished up treating Sam and closed up my first aid kit.

“Well, at least you are home and safe. Why don’t you take showers and change, and I’ll go make us something to eat okay?”

Dean and Sam both cracked a smile before gingerly standing from the bed.

“Thanks, Y /n.” Dean wrapped me in a hug, and I felt him press his lips to the crown of my hair before letting go and heading down the hall. Sam too wrapped me up in a hug before he went towards the showers.

I could finally feel myself relax as my body and brain finally got the message that the boys were okay.

Thirty-seven minutes. That was how long Gabriel had spent playing his kazoo before it was torn from his lips and thrown into the abyss. Which left him and Entity sitting across from each other on the dark floor, having a... little debate.

"You have to sleep." Entity grounded out, Gabriel felt satisfied at seeing the other's hands gripping the jacket.

"Why?" Gabriel countered, his posture much more relaxed, a lazy grin resting across his lips.

"Because you have to."

"But, why?"

"Because I said so!"

"Why?" A growl left the Cosmic Entity at yet another why, while Gabriel's grin only widened.

"Because you're a nuisance." Entity growled out, his hands tightening until the knuckles turned white. Gabriel could practically hear the other's teeth grinding against each other. If there was one thing the archangel enjoyed, it was getting a rise out of anyone.

"Yea, but why?"

"Because I need sleep and I can't sleep if you don't!" Entity's voice was harder, angrier, felt as if his bones shook at the sound, as much as he probably should have been worried, he only felt satisfaction. His mind wondering on just how much longer the Entity could deal with this.

"Okay..." Gabriel paused his grin dropping as he took in a deep breath. He watched as the other being seemed to relax ever so slightly, causing the archangel to smirk. Releasing his breathe he continued. "But, why?"

A small pause between the two, Gabriel smirking at the Entity while the other gave him a look. If looks could kill, Gabriel would have vaporized into nothing... If he were still alive that is. Before Gabriel could repeat what he said to irk the cosmic being more, an inhuman should left the Entity. A screeching that could very much rival that of an Angel's real voice to mortals.

"Fine! You win, I'll send you back!" Entity growled angrily, reaching a hand out towards Gabriel who dodged the touch.

"That would be all good and dandy but..." Gabriel shrugged, meeting the other's furious eyes. "I'll need you to send back about fifty or so angels as well."

"No." Entity snapped back. "It's you or nothing."

"Then I guess we should get to know each other." Gabriel leaned back, smirking at the other. "My name's Gabriel, I like long walks on the beach, intense po-"

"I'll send you back anyways." Entity cut him off, a challenging look entered Gabriel's eyes.

"And I'll just keep sending myself back here." Gabriel bit back, a look of realization passed through the other's eyes. "Whose to say I won't be awake every time."

"You'll sleep." Entity promised, eyes glaring daggers into the relaxed trickster. Gabriel simply smiled, pulling yet another kazoo from his pocket and began playing. Entity growled angrily while Gabriel chose to playing Whatcha say by Jason Durelo instead.

Entity made it a whole twenty three minutes before Gabriel found his Kazoo flying from his lips once more. Gabriel held his smirking knowing that the Entity's patience was slowly but surely dwindling away. "I didn't finish!" Gabriel whined.

"I. Don't. Care." Entity snapped, teeth grinding, accent heavy. His reaction only fueled the archangel to go on.

"Oh, well then." Gabriel paused before meeting the other's eyes. "We should get to know each other!"

"How about you go to sleep?" Entity tried, knowing already that his suggestion never worked.

"Did I ever tell you about the time I made a college douche dance with an alien?" Gabriel asked, grinning at the groan he got in response. "Well, I was trying decided what the hell to do with him right? And it was right in my face! I set up the whole probing, and then had the dude forced to slow dance with the alien in a dress under the disco! Oh, let me tell you about the Spider incident." Gabriel laughed, jumping into the story while Entity groaned.

"You have to get tired eventually." Entity forced out, his words not hindering Gabriel's animated story-telling. The Cosmic being pressed the palm of his hands into his eyes with a groan. "I'll be fine, We'll be fine. He'll sleep." He mumbled, wincing his Gabriel's voice shot up in volume at the climax of the story.

"Oh man, that was fun... What to talk about next, hm... Budapest? Alligator in the sewers? Werewolf? Dancing Zebra?" Gabriel listed, mind rolling through the different ideas running through his mind before his eyes landed on the hunched over form of the Entity. A brilliant idea jumped into mind. "Oooh, here's a reenactment of every single porn fantasy I have had about the youngest Winchester. I'm very kinky so just hold on."

Entity groaned, pressing his palms harder into his eyes as the fantasy started rolling off of the Trickster's tongue. The insistent buzzing paired with the very loud and lewd wanton moans the archangel was adding to his growing migraine and aching body. "Is sleep too much to ask?"

"Now that that's over, go. To. Sleep." Entity grounded out once Gabriel's very detailed stories were over. The Cosmic being wasn't use to having to be awake for so long that it was being to take quite the toll on him. When no response came but a grin from the angel, Entity spatted out. "Just sleep!"

"Just Sleep!" Gabriel mimicked, over exaggerating an accent. Entity grounded his teeth, pressing a knuckle against his temple and took a deep breath.

"Will you just go to sleep."

"Will you just go to sleep." Gabriel countered in the obnoxious accent. Not that Entity would admit it, but he'd take the graphic pornography over this mockery.

"Are you going to keep this up?"

"Are you going to keep this up?" Entity's blood boiled, his patience thinning the longer he went without sleep. On the other hand, Gabriel was grinning, unaffected by anything that had transpired and very much enjoying himself.

"OH MY- YOU ARE RIDICULOUS!" Entity all but shouted at the angel, running a frustrated hand through his hair.

"OH MY- YOU ARE RIDICULOUS!" Gabriel all but shouted back, mimicking the movements of the Entity pulling yet another growl from the other being.

"You're just like a child!" Entity grumbled, dropping his head into his hands with a huff.

"You're just like a child!" Gabriel copied, exaggerating his own huff, grinding on the Entity's nerves.

"So that was the first time I was with a man." Gabriel concluded, pressing a fingering to his chin. "It also the first time I had to tell a lover."

"I don't care." Entity grumbled into his hands as Gabriel continued as if he hadn't head the cosmic being speak.

"Y'know I never really considered myself to be a fighter. More of a lover." Gabriel shrugged, glancing over at the hunched over form. "Did you know, I once fucked a-"

"OKAY YOU WIN!" Entity cut him off, straightening himself up. "You can have all the fucking angels you want, just not another sex story!" Gabriel grinned meeting his eyes, before nodding.

"Fifty angels, oh and make sure you through Balthazar into the mix... Oh and Rachel, and Jophiel. Man he knew how to party." Gabriel nodded with a grin, Entity sighed, pinching the bridge of his noise.

"Okay, deal. " Entity nodded, waving a hand through the air. Gabriel felt it, it was a strong surge of energy before it settled. "Their all back in heaven or Earth. You're turn-"

"Wait." Gabriel paused, pushing Entity's hand away from his face. "I'm gonna need Fergus as well."

"The deal was angels." Entity grounded out, annoyance and anger clear throughout him.

"Yea, but I owe it to a hot redhead." Gabriel shrugged. "Not like you'll miss em."

"Fine." Entity grounded out, before quickly pressing his palm against Gabriel's forehead. A strong sense of falling filled the archangel's senses before all went black.

The moment Gabriel opened his eyes, he felt it. He felt Heaven becoming stronger, stabler. He grinned in triumph as he pulled himself off the ground, eyes roaming the field he appeared in before landing on the other vessels slowly getting up. He knew these ten, maybe fifteen, angels weren't all of them, but they were enough to get the word out. Pulling himself up on a tree stump, he turned to the confused angels.

"Alright Listen up!" Gabriel called over, gaining the attention of the small mass. "I just spent dad knows how long annoying a Cosmic Entity older than God himself for you all to come back. Heaven was falling, shit hit the fan. All that I need you all to do is only take orders from Castiel or I."

"Gabriel?" A voice called out from the crowd, one the archangel wasn't sure which angel it belonged to. "Why would we listen to you? You ran, and left Heaven."

"Because he is still Gabriel, an archangel. One of our father's first sons." Gabriel smiled at the voice, his eyes landing on none other then his old pal, Jophiel. "Gabriel has never steered us wrong, never lied to us, so who are we to disbelieve him."

"Jophiel." Gabriel greeted with a grin before turning to everyone. "As much as I could careless what happened to all the hairless apes, I'd like it if our home didn't crumble."

"This is absurd!"

"He saved all our lives!" Another angel called out. "We owe him the benefit of the doubt." A small grumble filtered through the crowd, Gabriel worried for a moment that this plan was a bust. That was before all the angels kneel before him, the thumbs up from Jophiel was enough to get the archangel back into motion.

"Now I have some unfinished business, in the meantime I need you to find the other angels I've brought back with me." Gabriel ordered, an odd feeling at being in control filtered through him. He was definitely leaving this to Castiel once things settled. "Those not look, should go to Heaven. Make sure all is going smoothly."

"I don't know Cas." Sam sighed out as the duo entered the bunker, eyes scanning for any of the new occupants but finding none in the immediate area. "Micheal is free to do whatever he wants. Jack is bed-ridden and injured. We won't have long before Micheal makes a move to cleanse the earth." One look at Castiel confirmed he thought the same as Sam.

"Oh but we do, Samsquatch." Gabriel grinned at the shocked and confused looks he received from the duo.

"Gabriel?! How, I saw you die..." Sam trailed eyes trained on the archangel.

"I took a pointer from Cassie here, I annoyed a Cosmic Entity until he did what I wanted." Gabriel shrugged, leaning his chin on the palm of his hand. "I got us a few angels to help keep Heaven running, and might have thrown in a gift for the witch."

"Crowley." Castiel spoke, glancing over at Sam who still seemed to be taking it in.

"I also told all of em to take orders from you." Gabriel pointed a finger to the angel. "So, what'd I miss?"

"A lot." Sam sighed, falling into a seat near Gabriel, glancing over in time to see Castiel fly off, most likely to heaven. "Lucifer's dead, Micheal took over Dean. Jack's healing from the whole thing."

"Don't tell me Dean was stupid enough to make a deal with Micheal?" Gabriel sighed, meeting Sam's slightly confused look. "Micheal and Luci are pretty much one in the same. Both are double-crossing, back stabbing great big bag of dicks. Not surprised Micheal didn't let Deano go."

"What do we do?" Sam asked, Gabriel took in the lost and defeated look the Winchester had.

"If there's one thing I know, it's how to handle unwanted guests." Gabriel mused, looking over to the taller Winchester. The archangel stood, before addressing Sam. "I recommended you call the hot redhead, and find where ever Crowley fell to. I've got a few things I need to gather for this." Just like that Sam was left alone, eyes trained on the blank spot the archangel once stood.

Even with all the times plans backfired, Sam couldn't help the bubble of hope rise in him. He's team was completed, they had a whole army of angels in Heaven helping fuel it, and they have Gabriel. With a soft sigh, Sam made his way further into the bunker. Making his way to the others. The chatter quited down at the sight of Sam, all eyes focused on him.

  There you were, in the middle of the forest, the moon being the only light you had. It smelled of wet trees and dirt and you were running, but you couldn’t remember what you were running from. Your breathing was harsh and you felt like one of your lungs might collapse. Whatever it was, your mind kept telling you to run.

You’ve never seen this forest before but somehow you knew your way around it. “I’m almost there”, you thought to yourself. But exactly where is there?

You continued running, realizing now that you were barefoot because of all the twigs and rocks digging into your skin as you ran across the dirt. The same words kept running through your mind.

I’m almost there.

I’m almost there.

And suddenly, you were there. The forest ended and you reached a two way road. The moon was no longer in the sky but now the sun was radiating it’s heat onto you. This is where you were trying to get to. You stopped running and began walking down the road. Once again, you somehow knew which way to go. No more than five minutes later, lights began appearing down the road indicating that the city was down that way.

You began to run again.

You reached the city and so many people were out and walking about in the streets. You turned around and seen a banner across the road saying “New Orleans Mardi Gras February 13th”.

“New Orleans!?” You yelled to yourself, causing a few people to stare at you.

A great crowd of people were walking down the street but you began walking the opposite way.

“Can you help me?” You asked, but what did you need help with?

Everything was so confusing to you but at the same time, everything made sense and you continued to move.

You continued walking and a man ran up to your face.

“MARDI GRAS! WOO!” He yelled. He had his face painted red and was wearing a blue afro wig. Not to mention he was wearing no other clothing other than blue crocs and his boxer underwear.

You backed up, the man continuing to yell in your face. You put your face in your hands and continued to back up until something made you trip in your step. You swung your arms around to try to catch your balance, but you fell. But you didn’t fall on concrete.

Instead, you fell on top of a bed. The sheets covered your body and the smell was familiar, but you couldn’t pin point exactly where the smell was from.

You looked around, a room you’ve never seen before. You sat up and slowly lifted the bed sheets off of your body and noticed a big diamond ring on your left hand. You sat back and brought your hand up closer to your face, and examined the beautiful ring.

“It’s almost as beautiful as you are.” A deep voice said from the side of the room. You looked away from your hand and toward the voice to see Dean walking out of the bathroom with a towel barely hanging around his hips.

You didn’t respond and he just laughed. “Almost.” He smiled and winked at you and walked around the bed and into a walk in closet.

This day was becoming more weird every second. You got up and quickly walked to the bathroom. You accidently slammed the door behind you and you made sure to lock the door. There was a window across the bathroom, next to the toilet, and you stepped on the seat to take a look outside. Day turned to night, and everything suddenly seemed so unreal.

You closed your eyes and took a deep inhale, slowly exhaling to calm yourself. When you opened your eyes, you caught a glance of the way you looked in the mirror.

You gasped at the sight. It was you, but then it wasn’t. You looked physically fit and amazingly healthy. Your skin looked as if it had been sun kissed and your hair was so beautiful. You ran your fingers through your hair, and the softness made everything seem real.

You heard footsteps outside the bathroom door and decided to step out. You opened the door and peeked out, seeing Dean fixing the bed.

You walked slowly on the balls of your feet, worried that if you did some weird move, you’ll end up somewhere else across the country.

“Hey Y/N, are you okay?” Dean asked, his words drenched in worry.

You nodded your head. “I think so.” You continued to look around the big bedroom, admiring the walls that were filled with pictures and paintings and looking at the great chandelier hanging above the bed. “Are we married?”

Dean laughed and walked up to you. He grabbed you and brought you into his arms and ran his fingers through your soft hair. “Yes. Have been for three years now. You sure you’re feeling alright?”

You stepped back, out of Dean’s arms, and shook your head ‘no’.

“Okay, you need some rest. You had a long and hard day today.”

Dean grabbed your hand and helped you get back in bed. He lifted up the bed sheets and when you got in, he tucked the sheets right under your body, making you feel secure.

He gently kissed your head and walked away to the other side of the bed. He got under the sheets with you and turned to shut the bed lamp off. The bedroom turned dark, except for the bright moon that was shining into the bedroom.

“Come here.” Dean said.

You quickly moved towards him, excited to cuddle with him. He turned you away from him and he wrapped his arms around your waist. He smelled like soap and aftershave, a smell that you always thought was a great combination on him.

You felt him snuggle into your hair and heard him take a deep breath.

“I love you.” He said and he slowly drifted off to sleep.

“And then we went to sleep and I woke up! It was honestly the weirdest dream I’ve ever had.” You tried to tell Dean your dream to the best of your abilities. It was one of those dreams where it was really difficult to explain every detail.

About a month ago you promised yourself you wouldn’t eat late at night, because that is what gives you the weird dreams. But last night you made some bomb dinner for yourself, Dean and Sam, and you just had to have seconds.

Dean suddenly said, louder than usual, “Oh my God, I had the exact same dream!”

“Really?” You asked. You thought it was unusual for you and Dean to have the same dream.

“Are you crazy? Of course I didn’t.”

You shoved Dean to the side and rolled your eyes at him. He’s always messing with you and he used to make fun of all the weird dreams you used to have.

“Although, I did like that last part of your dream.” He winked at you.

You blushed as he winked. He knew the way he made you feel, but yet he loved to give you those butterflies in your stomach and he loved to see your pale cheeks turn pink from embarrassment.

“Quit flirting and start researching!” Sam said from across the table that the three of you were sitting at.

You and Dean quickly averted your gazes to the books you both were reading and all Sam did was laugh, because he knew more than you and Dean. He stands on the sidelines and can see how much Dean really loves you. He can see how much you really love Dean. The only thing Sam can do is wait and see how long it takes before the two of you find out.

 This Time:

I felt my heart stop and I stared at him with wide eyes.

“What do you mean? ……He’s….he’s dead.”

Cas began shaking his head at me and my breath caught.

“No y/n, he’s alive. He’s back. He is with Dean and your father right now and I can take you there.”

I could feel my eyes welling with tears as his words hit me. Sam was alive?

“No…”

I could feel Cas staring at me and my body filled with anger. I wanted to yell, I wanted to scream. Why would he lie to me like that?

“I thought angels weren’t capable of lying Cas, but you have proved me wrong.”

My head was still down but Cas could see the glistening of tears landing on the bedspread from where he sat. Without warning I spun around to face the angel, my face etched in fury.

“How could you of all people do this to me Cas!? How could you stand there and lie to my face like that!?” I yelled.

Castiel flinched at my yelling but at that moment, I couldn’t feel sorry for him. Was this some kind of punishment? To taunt me with Sam’s death? To make me pay for not being able to save him?

“I know you are upset Y/n but believe me, I’m not lying to you. I’ll take you to him and let you see for yourself. I don’t know how he is back, but he is y/n. I would never do something like that to you.”

I let a sob erupt from my throat and I sat down on the bed and began to cry into my hands. Cas hesitantly placed his hand on my back and began to rub in a circle.

“Dean once showed me that this was comforting to some humans. Is it helping? I can stop if you want.”

I couldn’t help but laugh a little. He sounded so concerned. Shaking my head, I took in a shaky breath before speaking.

“I’m sorry Cas...I’m sorry for yelling at you. I know you would never lie to me like that. I’m sorry.”

“Come now, I’ll take you to him Y/n.”

I wiped my tears and grabbed my bag off the bed before standing in front of Cas. I watched him place 2 fingers on my forehead. The world spun for a moment and I thought I was going to be sick, then suddenly I was standing on the front porch of my fathers’ salvage yard. The old ‘Singer Salvage’ sign was hanging down some and a few boards on the front porch were broken.

“He is in there y/n.”

I spun around quickly, not realizing that Castiel had not left. He approached me slowly and gave me a small smile. It was strange to see the angel smile, but I couldn’t help but believe him. I walked up the stairs and reached for the doorknob. I paused then slowly retracted my hand back to rest at my side.

“What is it?” Cas asked from behind me.

“What if this is all a dream Cas? I don’t know if I could handle it not being real. It’s been almost a year…” I trailed off for a moment. “What if he isn’t the same? What if-“

I broke off, not wanting to think about it.

“You won’t know if you don’t see him.”

His face shifted and was suddenly set in determination, he then stepped forward, knocked on the door and quickly vanished.

‘Dammit Cas!’ I thought as I heard footsteps approaching the door. Moments later it swung open and I came face to face with the barrel of my father’s shotgun.

“Y/n?”

I gave my father a small grimace and shrugged.

“Hi, dad….”

He lowered his gun and instantly I was splashed in the face with Holy Water and I could feel him cut my hand with his silver blade.

“It’s me,” I said, spitting out some of the holy water that had gone into my mouth.

Instantly I was pulled into a hug and I could feel my father shaking a bit.

“Where the hell have you been you idjit!? I should shoot you where you stand for not checking in.”

Pulling back from the hug I sighed.

“I’m sorry…after everything happened…I just…I couldn’t…”

Bobby shook his head with a small frown. He was angry but he understood. When his wife died, he hadn’t handled it well. Everyone handles grief in different ways. He himself had drunk himself into a stupor. John Winchester was a prime example of what grief can do to someone.

“I get it, girl. You needed time- “

He was interrupted by a voice and I couldn’t help but smile a bit.

“Bobby! Who was at the- “

I smiled at the person as they entered the room and his eyes landed on mine.

“Hey, Dean…”

“Y/n…”

In 3 short strides, Dean was out the front door and pulling me into a tight hug, his arms wrapping all the way around me. He rested his chin on the top of my head like he was trying to make sure I was really there.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry Y/n,” he mumbled into the top of my head.

I pulled back from the hug with a confused look.

“Why are you sorry Dean? You have nothing to be sorry for.”

Dean shook his head as he stepped away from me.

“I’m sorry for never calling to check in on you. I should have called, and I shouldn’t have left you like I did.”

He continued to apologize and ramble, and finally, I stopped it with a hand over his mouth.

“Dean. You have nothing to apologize for. You made Sam a promise and you kept to that promise. That’s it.”

Dean continued to shake his head and he pulled my hand off his mouth.

“I made Sam more than one promise. I promised him that I would take care of you and not let anything bad happen to you.”

“Dean I’m fine!”

“Cas told me about your hunting and your injuries. He told me everything before he came to get you. I know all about the recklessness and the constant hunting y/n. I should have been there to protect you!”

Before I could argue back, my father stepped in between us and put his hands up.

“Alright! Enough you two! It’s like cats and dogs fighting in here. Can we get back to the situation at hand? Like Sam being back from the dead maybe?”

The room was silent for a moment before Dean decided to speak up.

“I don’t know how he’s back, but he is.”

My eyes narrowed as I stared at him for a moment. I could tell that he wasn’t telling me everything, Dean could never look me in the eyes when he was lying or when he was withholding information.

“How long has he been back Dean?

Dean wouldn’t answer me, he just looked away. With a sudden burst of energy, I lunged forward and grabbed Dean around the collar and slammed him up against the wall. He let out a groan of pain as his back hit the wall.

“How long?” I ground out through clenched teeth.

Dean let his shoulders fall and he let out a deep breath.

“A year…but I just found out about him being back. He came and got me from Lisa’s just a few days ago. We’ve been trying to track you down since then. Cas finally showed up and told us he knew where you were.”

I laughed dryly and let Dean off the wall. My hands wove into my hair and I felt like ripping it out. A year…he’s been back over a year and I’m just now finding out about it. My hands dropped to my side and I turned to look at my father. I could tell by the way he was looking around and not meeting my eyes that he knew more than he was letting on as well.

“How long have you known Dad?”

“The whole time, but there’s something you should know y/n. He’s not the same as he was.” Dad shook his head and ran his hand across his beard. Something he only did when he was uncomfortable. “Something’s not right with him y/n. It’s like he’s not the same Sam. He doesn’t act the same way as he used to.”

Shaking my head, I could feel tears welling up, but I blinked them back. Instantly, I started to walk towards the front door. I couldn’t do this right now. I wasn’t prepared for any of this. The sound of footsteps coming down the stairs echoed through the room and I froze with my hand on the doorknob.

“Dean? Bobby? Who’s here?”

I felt my breath catch in my throat as the footsteps continued into the room with us and finally came to a stop in the same room.

“Y/n?”

I clenched my teeth and blinked away my tears harshly before letting out a deep breath. I dropped my hand from the doorknob and slowly turned to face him

“Mmm, I’m so happy you’re home.” Sam had been on a hunt with Dean for over a week now and they had just returned about an hour ago. It felt like she hadn’t seen him in forever and there was an ache in her chest. All she wanted to do was be held by him right now. She felt like at any moment, he would slip away from her.

“Y/n? Baby? You have to wake up baby! This isn’t real! Y/n? Y/n!”

“Y/n!”

“Y/N!!!”

I jolted awake on my pillow and instantly let out a sob. Of course, it was a dream. He was dead, and he wasn’t coming back, not this time. Sam was dead and there was nothing I could do about it.

*Flashback*

“NO! SAM!!! NO!!”

I lunged forward to grab at him, but Dean pulled me back to him and held me tightly as I screamed and cried. I fought and fought, trying to get to him, then all at once everything stopped.

I pulled my head away from Dean’s chest and looked around. Sam was nowhere to be found. I felt a weight settle in my chest as the reality of the situation hit me.

Sam was gone. He was in the cage with Lucifer, and he wasn’t coming back.

I let out a loud sob and fell to my knees where Sam was last standing, the hole that was once the cage, now closed and gone.  

“Y/n….”

My head snapped to the side and saw Cas standing next to me along with a fully healed Bobby. I let the tears fall even faster as I shot up off the ground and into the arms of my father. Bobby wasn’t my real dad, but he might as well be. My parents were killed a long time ago and Bobby saved me from being killed. He took me in and raised me.

“It’s okay sweetheart…. It’ll be okay.”

I could hear his gruff voice telling me over and over that it would be okay, but I knew it wouldn’t. I just lost one of the most important people in my life and he wasn’t ever coming back. So, I held onto my father and cried.

*End Flashback*

That very same night, both Dean and I left my dad’s house with no intention of returning. We had gone to a motel in Kansas and spent the night. The next morning, I woke up alone. I tried calling Dean, but he had disconnected his number. I knew where he had gone because Sam had Dean make a promise. Dean was with Lisa and I wasn’t going to track him down and try and make him leave. So, I checked out, hotwired a car, and took off after the next case. That was over a year and a half ago and it still feels like yesterday.

Shaking my head to get back to reality, I pulled myself out of bed with a small sigh. I wiped the tears from my face and groaned. I could feel a sharp stinging on my side where the stitches of my latest wound pulled some as I stood up. I hadn’t given up hunting since then, in fact, I had started hunting even more than usual. I was being reckless with my hunts, that’s why I have a huge gash on my side from a werewolf. Dad would kill me if he knew.

“Hello Y/n.”

With a gasp, I spun around with my gun drawn only to see Castiel standing there.

“Cas, what have I said about that? What are you doing here anyway?”

Placing my gun on the table and lifting my shirt, I grimaced at the sight of my wound. It was turning a slight yellow meaning that an infection was setting in.

“Let me.”

Cas took several strides across the room before gently placing his hand over the wound and healing it.

“Thank you, Cas. Now…why are you here? It’s been over a year since I’ve seen you. You haven’t answered any of my prayers and now you show up? Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to see you but ya know…It’s odd.”

Cas took a seat on the bed across from me before speaking.

“It’s about Sam.”

I interrupted him before he could say anything else. I didn’t want to talk about Sam, it still hurt too much.

“I’m fine Cas. I’ve been a little reckless recently and I realize that. I’m gonna slow down hunting, but I’m coping. He’s been gone for over a year and a half, there’s nothing I can-“