#spn20

hi z, happy belated wincest wednesday and happy belated anniversary! thank you very much for the question, i appreciate you including me in the celebration <3

and it would be funny if i said differently before, but trying to remember now i feel like it was less a jolt and more a gradual dawning over the length of s3, and by very supernatural christmas i already could never have unseen it (i think that quiet closing conversation was so desperately romantic as well as incredibly sibling-y and it's the combo that was 🤌about it). and then we got mystery spot that drove the point of the mutuality home with such force i think my back hit the wall haha. not that it wasn't obvious before, but getting that much from sam so openly was maybe a first. and then the everything else and just — wow. wow.

i'm a simple gal, i'm weak for stories of devotion that transcends pretty much everything, and wincest is that dialed up to eleven, so the appeal was colossal. the incest part is the least of that transcending power, imo, but even then — they do have to get there first. and watching them cross (off) both external and internal boundaries and restrictions one by one in their desperate need and want to be near each other, with each other (and the twenty way it backfires not just for the Responsibilities TM but for the very bond they're chasing) was insanely compelling. and i'm still just talking about the early stuff both for them and for me, haha! the non-immediate layers of appeal are innumerable. and, hey, they're that damn pretty and have frankly ridiculous chemistry, how could i not go there :)

and, unfortunately, i can't remember the exact fic that made me gasp with recognition. i do remember my very first wincest fic, which i think nailed some details and small but impactful truths about them (because i still remember some very on point passages that got specifically at that intersection of romantic and brotherly in a very canon-feeling and emotionally effective manner) but that i would hesitate to re-read now.

and it feels awkward to say in response to this ask, but i clearly remember the first writer i thought this about. like wow, they really really get at the heart of it — that was you :) but god, again, i do not remember the exact story — it must have been someting set early in the show, as i tended to read chronologically as i went through the seasons; i'll tell you if i recall it. but you have a very specific ability of fleshing both sam and dean out individually in such a way that their connection and whatever aspect of it you want to highlight follows naturally and precisely from this deep understanding. so, yeah. it was a very strong impression, the giddy leg wiggles i did were numerous!

and as a nostalgic addition, i must say i still am incredibly grateful every time i think about the hold this ship had on me at the time (and it's still there, if dormant and waiting to be rekindled) because it was so great it drew me out of lurking for good. i still consider the small community within community you in particular and the rest of our circle built a gift i was lucky to be given, with all its humour, and enthusiasm, and connection, and creativity, and fruitful discussion, and straight up mentorship when it came to my fandom endeavours. i found my little corner and even though i'm not really anywhere right now, when i'm somewhere i'm usually over there :)

"We've got work to do."

Twenty years ago the pilot for Supernatural aired and I was hooked.

I’ve loved this stupid show for 12 years and what Andrew Dabb said here constantly rattles around my brain. 😵‍💫— anyway. I’m thinking of doing a one off episode— an hour or something. Wrapping things up, conveniently fixing things that people have grievances with, etc.

Please message me some of your favorite moments/ episodes, if you wish— I’m gonna put a poll below the cut for favorite seasons! :3 who knows if this will actually… become anything besides a script, but omg. Wouldn’t it be so fun if it did? 🥲