season 8 is crazy because while i get why they cut the āi love youā line and i donāt even dislike the āi need youā line, i wish theyād kept, āi forgive you,ā because itās like. youāre gonna kill me. i know youāre gonna kill me. please donāt hate yourself for it. please donāt carry it with you. donāt wonder if i forgave you. donāt wonder if i cared. youāre already forgiven. i love you.
and beyond that itās just likeā¦ clearly dean does love cas! we see it all season. itās new. its a new softness. itās a post purgatory thing. i donāt think dean would have said any of this pre season 8. pre purgatory. he cared for cas. but he didnāt need him. and he didnāt love him. and when he went insane and tried to become god, he didnāt forgive him. not right away. he didnāt want to. he wanted to be angry. it ate him alive to be that angry. he had to realize slowly through that experience that he cared. deeply. so much so that by the time heās in purgatory heās not leaving without the angel! either they both get out or neither one does. forget fault. forget why this even happened. forget casās guilt. forget whatever is happening topside. forget sam and his grief. dean isnāt leaving him. end of story.
and then dean makes it out and cas ā¦ doesnāt. and dean is fucking bereft. heās imagining cas everywhere. his longing is literally a tether, pulling cas to him in flashes until he is there for real. by the time cas is brainwashed and beating tf out of him dean loves him and has loved him but he KNOWS it. thereās no maybe. thereās no denying it, he doesnāt want to.
he doesnāt want cas to live with the pain of killing him, and he absolves him of that with what he thinks is his last breath. likeā¦ heās dying!! itās over!! but he forgives him, and he loves him, and he needs him to know.
