#sp sharon

LESBIAN WEEK 2025 - DAY 04

My south park rarepair since 2022

(It’s pretty long)

- Colorado and South Park native. Her great grandfather is canonically one of the original founders of the town.

- Jimbo is about 9 years her senior.

- Her maiden name is Kern. (I’m ignoring Kimball because I had a teacher named Kern and I liked the name better —,—)

- Great Grandpa was an Austrian immigrant named Johannes Kern with his wife named Marie

- Her parents, William and Joanne Kern, both passed away while she was 16 due to a car accident. Jimbo helped raise her after he came back from the war (not going to specify which war because it would mess up their ages)

- Raised Catholic, lapsed, but found faith again.

- Her favorite colors are burgundy (it’s brown and red mixed together) and blue .

- Sharon is tall for the South Park women, standing at 5’11” (179 CM). Her height is only beaten by Laura Tucker, who’s 6’ (182 CM). Randy is the same height.

- Originally, she got her pixie cut because Stan kept grabbing and yanking her hair as a baby. Found out she really likes the hairstyle so she decides to keep it (much to Randy’s dismay)

- She has deep, dark blue eyes, which many people find scary because they’re so deep, like the ocean.

- MILF through and through.

- Sharon is voluptuous. She’s just naturally fully figured. It’s a reason why she wears baggy clothing, so people won’t check her out.

- Her physical appearance, age, and personality make her a very intimidating person to those who aren’t attracted to her. A lot of women around town get jealous of her if they didn’t take the chance to know her.

- she’s a Sagittarius (also canon)

- She has a blunt and forward personality. It’s a result from dealing with Randy’s foolishness. Sometimes her comments would just slip out without her realizing (like with the comment she made about her eyes in Its a Jersey Thing)

- One of the youngest moms in the town, at a whopping 38

- Sharon met Randy while he was getting his doctorates in college for geology. She was a sophomore at 19 and he was around 6 years her senior. Sharon approached him at a party.

- Very rocky from the start but got better as time went on. When Randy got his doctorate he managed to get a place for both of them in South Park as the USGS had a position there and it was relatively cheap. She got pregnant with Shelley a little bit after and had to drop out her junior year

- Sharon originally wanted to be in the design field.

- Sharon LOVES to hike, camp, and go shooting. Got a lot of it from Jimbo. She’s not big on hunting though.

- You know the guns Randy somehow has in the farm despite his criminal past? Yeah those are all hers. She doesn’t know how Randy keeps breaking into the gun safe.

- Used to be a smoker, quit when she found out Shelley was coming.

- Despite her “favoritism” to Stan according to Shelley, she only gives Shelley more space because she understands how annoying people were when she was her age and doesn’t want to dote on her.

- When she was Shelley’s age, she also went through an “Ugly” phase

- Sharon was the leader of the book club before she moved out to the farm. Reading is a passion of hers and she is honestly a bit of a snob.

- Sharon runs a blog based off reading and book recommendations. Half the time she’s just dunking on BookTok for their content.

- Yes, Sharon is aware of how attractive she is to a lot of the kids around town. She’s heard too much snickering and seen too many blushes whenever she speaks to Stan’s friends.

- Can’t play video games for shit. She tries playing Stan’s games when he’s not around but just sucks at them. Does enjoy story focused games.

- Cannot play an instrument to save her life. (Her

- Her sex life with Randy is alright. She can’t complain or brag.

- She has a lot of money left over from her onlyfans (think like 10k) she has in a secret just-in-case-i-divorce-again savings account.

- Doesn’t drink hard liquor and she doesn’t usually drink often but when she does, but drinks a LOT of wine. Since it’s rare, she does only drink when acceptable by others.

- Really wants to divorce Randy again.