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20cm

˖ ᡣ𐭩 ⊹ ࣪ ౨ৎ˚₊ Childhood friend! Soobin x f! reader

You've always seen Soobin as one of your best friends - just a kid your mom's friend introduced to you as a playmate on a random hot, summer day. But what happens when that thin line between friendship and something more starts to blur? A few years and 20cm later you ask yourself : maybe he wasn't just the boy next door you have been playing with ever since you were seven. genre: rom-com, coming-of-age, slow burn, angst, fluff, no villains just fate.., Soobin being a D1 yearner, sunshine reader, emotionally constipated idiots in love

wc: 14k+ playlist: 20cm - txt, forty-one winks - txt, polaroid love - enhypen, all my poetry - close your eyes, heaven - txt, too close, - txt, sleep tight - enhypen, understand - keshi

disclaimer : english isn't my first language so i apologize for any grammar mistakes..

July 2008

7 years old

It was a nice summer day, you were busy watching your show on tv wearing a t-shirt and shorts lazily enjoying an ice popsicle. The fan helped cooling you down from the sticky summer heat.

Your attention shifted from your tv to your house door when the doorbell suddenly rang. You didn't mind at first though since your mom was eager to open the door.

But it seemed like you weren't going to be able to continue watching Winx Club since your mother excitedly called you over from the front porch "Y/n, love come over here, there's someone waiting for you".

You just took one last lick of the popsicle you were eating and threw the sticky and empty stick in the bin with haste, curious at who might be waiting by the door for you. Last time you checked, you weren't really going to meet up with your other friends from the neighborhood.

When you arrived at the door there was a nice looking lady around your mother's age talking to your mother.

"Hello", you smiled greeting her warmly. "Hi Y/n it's Mrs Choi remember me? I used to change your diapers when you were little. Oh Y/n-nie, you've grown so much since i last saw you. You look just like your father" This made the you pout. As much as you loved your father, you wanted to look like your mother. "No, I look like my mom". This blatant statement made both women laugh.

Then you realized, that this strange woman didn't come alone and was accompanied by another child - a little boy, who was sheepishly peeking out from her legs with wide curious eyes. "Come Soobin, don't hide, they wont bite" The lady teased her son who still didn‘t budge still too shy.

Being an extroverted child you merely smiled, excited to meet a new potential playmate.

"Hi!" you chirpily greeted "I'm Y/n, nice to meet you" You tried to meet his gaze but they were glued to the pebbles on the floor. Although you didn't mind and just waited patiently for a response.

His mother then crouched to his level and rubbed his back whispering sweet reassurances you could only hear snippets of. Something along the lines of "new playmate", "sweet girl" and "have fun".

In response the boy reluctantly introduced himself, nervously fiddling with his fingers. He was a cute chubby little boy and a tad bit shorter than her. "I-i-m SoObin" he answered quickly covering his mouth with both of his hands, cringing when he heard his voice crack.

This made you giggle. Hearing this made the boy shrink behind his mother's legs.

"Why don't you go and play in the backyard?", the boy's mother suggested and your own mother nodded in approval. "We'll call you when food is ready"

Eager to play you didn't want to waste precious time to get to know and play with this new boy

"Mom can i take Soobin to my tree house?" This made Soobin's ears perk who also waited for both your mothers' "yes", forgetting his initial reluctance.

"What do you think, baby?", Mrs. Choi asked her son. She just let out an endeared laugh when Soobin was already looking at her with wide expectant eyes already curious about the aforementioned tree house. Seeing this, you took it as a sign to take the boy's hand and pull him outside eager to show him your tree house.

"C'mon, i'll take you there. I promise you'll love it" You smiled looking back at him as he wordlessly followed you, not minding your impulsiveness and persuasiveness. He even found it interesting and fun

In a few seconds you arrived at your destination. You started to climb up but then noticed after climbing for a short while that the boy wasn't following you anymore.

You turned around while latching onto the ladder and saw his unsure expression. The boy kept fiddling with his fingers like before and seemed skeptical about the stability, since he keeps on looking at the treehouse's flooring. Having sensed his doubts, you didn't hesitate to reassure him

"Don't worry, my dad built this and he's an engineer. It's very safe, watch this"

To prove your point you jumped on the structure and it barely moved. He could only the clicking and clanking of your worn out flip flops against the wood. This seemed to reassure the boy who now slowly climbed up.

The treehouse embodied anything a child could want in one. It may be small but it was sturdy. His eyes immediately caught the two irresistibly comfortable looking red big bean bags on the floor, a wooden table with a pitcher filled with water and a lemon, accompanied by two empty glasses and a volume of "Detective Conan", not to mention a small radio. He was also intrigued by the balcony with a ship's steering wheel. After giving it a few playful spins, he continued his little inspection and found a rope that led to the roof, but he didn't dare climb up yet.

This treehouse also had two windows. One gave you a view of the garden and one overlooked the neighborhood's street, which was currently empty other than the postman who was on his bike riding through the neighborhood to deliver everyone their mail.

"Hi Mr. Kwan!", you called out to him. The mailman already knew where to look and waved back, nodding at the new curious boy beside her.

"That was Mr. Kwan, our mail man." "He seems nice" "Yeah, he often gives me a lollipop whenever im the one who picks up the package."

The two kids then threw themselves on the bean bags and basked in a few seconds of comfortable silence.

"May i have some water?", he politely asked parched because of the hot and humid weather. "Of course! Make yourself feel at home!" She then poured him and herself a glass of water clumsily spilling a few drops onto the table.

Feeling curious she then asked "When did you move here? I've never seen you before until today and im friends with most of the kids here on our block - you should definitely play with us sometime, we'll have a blast." noticing she drifted away from the topic she circled back to her initial question "Okay but back to the question. When did you move here?"

"W-well, my family just moved next door recently today."

"Ahh you probably were the ones who brought that big white truck from this morning right? I passed by it when i went to buy breakfast from the corner shop" She tapped her chin remembering little details she probably dismissed as unimportant before. The boy only nodded in response.

Before the two knew it they were fondly exchanging little personal details or experiences, the way little kids do and started bonding through shared interests like Detective Conan or Pac-man. As their conversation flowed naturally, Soobin's sheepish demeanor slowly faded.

"Why don't we go to an arcade together? I saved a bit and can buy us a few tokens" she enthusiastically. The boy nodded eagerly in response. "I can also ask mom for some pocket money. Then we can buy more tokens!" "Sounds like a plan".

Then Soobin's eyes darted towards the nerf guns tucked under the table. "Are those Nerf Guns?" he pointed "I've always wanted one but my mom says they'll only be a mess and a waste of money" he ranted, his wide eyes glued to said toy.

"Ah, i often play with these and battle with my friends. It's really fun" She said taking one gun and crawled over towards a stray box a few meters from the bean bag she's sitting on, which stored the soft plastic bullets. "Wanna play?" she grinned at him with a challenging look as she reloaded her gun. After finishing, she handed him the box with the left over bullets so he can reload the other nerf gun. "You're on!" he smiled, showing off his dimples, hastily reloading.

June 2011

10 years old

"Hurry up the others are already waiting at Beomgyu's houseee" You urged the boy who was already sweating buckets to ride his bike faster.

In his defense he wore a backpack filled with water guns and packs of water balloons. You were already meters ahead of the boy which made him call out

"Wait for me - i'm- i'm coming!" Soobin grit his teeth and pedaled faster and faster, fighting his way through exhaustion trying to catch up to you.

Soon enough you both arrived at Beomgyu's home. "Hi Mrs. Choi!" you greeted your friend's mother, who smiled seeing your familiar face behind the door. "Where's Soobin" she asked. This confused you since you thought the boy was still behind you

"Um.. he's-"

panting with his skin sheen with sweat, the poor boy finally reached their destination albeit a few minutes later.

He couldn't catch his breath and placed his hands on both his knees trying to regain some stamina. His hair sticking to his forehead. "Mrs- Mrs- Ch- Ch-oi" he weakly raised one hand to politely say hello. He still remembers his manners, even when he's breathless.

This earned him a tug by you who was impatiently waiting for him eager to play with their other friends "C'mon 'Bin hurry i wanna playy!!"

It's been a year since you were first introduced to each other and it's been a year since you first brought him to your treehouse and became friends with each other.

It didn't take long for him to be a part of your little friend group and it certainly didn't take long for you to be comfortable with each other, developing small habits like you dragging him anywhere you want and him mindlessly following.

"Finallyyy what took you two so long?" Beomgyu whined seeing his two best friends walk into the garden with a backpack filled with water fight goodies.

"Easy for you to say.. You didn't have to haul all these water guns, balloons and snacks UPHILL " Soobin muttered while handing out the water guns feeling annoyed.

"You could've asked Y/n to carry a few - her backpack is almost empty!" Yeonjun chuckled, while taking a water gun from Soobin's hand.

Soobin paused. Right. He could've just given Y/n a few more things, but he didn't really mind carrying them all for her. She'd keep on complaining anyway, saying how it's hindering her from riding, “faster than the wind”

Come to think of it, he was used to doing things for you even though you don't really ask for it.

He always saw his father do similar things for his mother, so he's pretty sure it's normal. Besides, you never objected.

July 2013

13 years old

You sprung out of bed today. Well, why wouldn't you? It's your birthday.

Running down the stairs of your home you were greeted by your mother who was still busy making breakfast

"Awake so early?" She teased. "I haven't even finished your breakfast, love"

Your mother always made you stacks of pancakes according to your age - this year it will be thirteen and you just can't wait to stuff your face.

It's also your first year being a teenager. It's practically a grown up you thought. You looked forward to living your teenage life the way High School Musical promised you. Maybe even find the Troy to your Gabriella.

//

After finishing your breakfast you immediately headed out to hang out with your best friends. Surely they won't say no.

well... you first asked your one and only ride or die who lived closest to you.

"Binnie, you wanna hang out?" You asked your friend who looked like he'd seen a ghost "Hang out? uh- you know today might be a bad day to play because um.." His eyes darted everywhere but towards your eyes and he couldn't stop fiddling with his hands. "Well you see-" "Sorry y/n we're busy. We'll go out tomorrow okay?" Yeonjun finished the sentence for Soobin, who couldn't find the words. "Yeonjun?" you were so confused. "what are you-" "bye." Yeonjun then slammed the door shut at you.

This was perplexing.. You couldn't remember if you did something wrong. Okay, maybe it's because you and Beomgyu pranked the two yesterday, splashing a bucketful of water on them while they took a nap in the treehouse, but they usually never really stayed mad at you for long....

As you contemplated the possible reasons for their weird behavior, you could hear snippets from behind the door. It sounded like Soobin's voice and he sounded timid and regretful. "Wasn't that a bit too mean?". "Oh, come on " Yeonjun answered "It was necessary, now let's not waste any more time "

After that fiasco you decided to ask your other friend Taehyun, who conveniently lived right across Soobin's home. When his mother opened the door for you, you saw Taehyun carrying an air pumper and a blue plastic bag, concealing its contents.

"Taehyun, Y/n's here" his mother called out but hearing this the boy rushed to his bedroom and shut the door. "Tell her i can't right now mom"

His mother looked just as perplexed as you are. Wasn't he literally just here carrying an air pump and a plastic bag? You bit the inside of your cheek, swallowing your disappointment.

Now you decided to try one more time and marched towards Beomgyu's home.

On the way you saw Kai who was riding his bike towards Beomgyu's house. You saw how Beomgyu was already outside waiting for Kai. It seemed like they already had something planned.

Well, you didn't think hanging out without you was a crime. But it felt like they were actively pushing you away.. Or maybe you were just imagining things, overthinking. Yeah that's probably it right?

You then made eye contact with Kai who visibly stiffened. The startled boy then started to rapidly tap Beomgyu's shoulder who seemed to be busy loading the basket on the back of his bike with what looked like colorful paper bags.

You were too far to actually see what he was loading on his bike. Hesitating for a second you jogged towards the two.

"Go, go, go " Huening ushered Beomgyu who started to ride his bike. Weirdly enough he was taking the path away from the others (others being Yeonjun's, Taehyun's, Soobin's) and his home.. Weird, you thought. Who else would Beomgyu hang out with who lives that way..?

Now you awkwardly stood there alone with Kai, who kept looking away and then back at you pursing his lips tightly.

He then laughed awkwardly. "Y/n... what's- what's up?". You tried to inspect his face and tried to read his expression. "Why are you guys all acting so weir-"

"WEIRD? us? who? what do you mean? im TOTALLY normal, i don't know about the others though."

He interrupted, frantically waving his hands. It was a pretty sorry attempt to deflect, but hey, A+ for effort.

You just continued to look at him suspiciously. "Well, i guess it's just us then.." you muttered. "What? Do you not like hanging out with me?" Kai teased. You just grinned in response and pushed him playfully - well maybe a bit too hard for it to be playful since Kai almost lost his footing "HEY!" he scolded suppressing a grin trying to stay stern, but alas he wasn't really mad. This was normal in your friendship. But what wasn't was the others suddenly acting so distant. The thought made you frown.

"You okay?" Kai asked. "Why are the others acting so weird? Did i do something? We were all fine when we played yesterday and i don't remember doing something really bad" You said, looking at your playmate wearing a face filled with undeniable disappointment, confusion and before you could spiral Kai touched your shoulder pulling you out of your thoughts. "Nu-uh, you didn't do anything-" Before he could continue you heard a static sounding "Popping Star is ready to pop"

"Is that a walkie talkie?" You asked baffled by the random sound. Kai just smiled widely and shook his head, his hair comically flying around from the motion. He excitedly then tugged you along. "Lets go, you'll see in just a minute"

Kai brought you to your treehouse in your backyard. You were confused, you saw the others' bikes but couldn't hear them. Usually it'd be as loud as a zoo, but now it's radio silent.. Today is such a weird day you thought. But when you reached the top.

POP

"SURPRISEEEE!!" three different voices shouted while holding party poppers, which were the ones responsible for the loud sounds.

You felt ecstatic and tears welled up in your eyes. "Oh my god" you squealed. You have celebrated your birthday with them before, but this was the first time they surprised you with a small party with just the six of you.

The treehouse was meticulously decorated with balloons and paper streamers all in your favorite colors. On the table you then saw five different colorful paper bags.

"Oh my god is this what you brought over?" you laughed asking Beomgyu who nodded frantically in response

"I managed to fit them all in that tiny basket behind my bike" He proudly stated "You should thank me properly, you know, i had to take a detour which made me ride like 10 minutes longer than i would've had to, because you just appeared out of nowhere. You know I had to drive by Ms. Han's home and her ugly dog literally chased me for two blocks" He whined, shaking your arm, begging for some sympathy (and an extra reward, preferably your mother's cookies).

Well, now it made sense why he drove the other direction after Kai frantically tapped his shoulder (which was actually borderline hitting, Beomgyu added).

"And Huening kept HITTING my shoulder while i was packing the gifts in the basket, he was starting to piss me off"

"HEY, i was just warning you and you didn't really answer me and i was panicking okay? What if she saw and we blew the cover?"

While those two bickered you looked around and realized a certain someone wasn't there.

"Guys where's Soobin?", you asked looking around, but then Yeonjun who was already grinning widely started counting down

five

six

five

six

seven

eight

"Happy Birthday to you"

They started to sing and Soobin slowly moved out of his hiding spot which was behind a wall by the balcony area.

"Happy Birthday to you"

Soobin walked towards you holding a birthday cake, strawberry shortcake you figured, with squiggly handwriting that says Happy Birthday, the H was significantly bigger than all the other letters, which seemed to get smaller and smaller towards the end, but it still looked cute. Simple but cute and utterly on brand for them. And it was all just for you.

"Happy Birthday Dear Y/n, Happy Birthday to you"

Soobin smiled at you.

"Make a wish"

You just stared at him, how could you not, his dimples and smile, the way his face glowed because of the candles. He looked so pretty-

Wait.

Hold on.

This was your best friend you were calling pretty, the one who is still scared of bugs and cries whenever someone shows him a picture of IT or any clown in that sense.

no he's not pretty. he's not pretty. he's not pret-

"C'mon Y/n, make a wiisshhhughh" Beomgyu whined impatiently, eager to eat cake.

Snapping out of your daze, you closed your eyes, clasping your hands together as you silently made your wish.

"I wish we could all stay together forever"

and then you blew your candles.

//

Having eaten the cake it was finally time to open your gifts. You all made yourself comfortable on the main area of the treehouse, having established spots after all these years.

Taehyun and Kai started off first. (They both scrounged up their pocket money to buy their gift dor you)

"We asked 'Bin for tips and he told us you really liked this book series so we bought you the newest part of the saga" Taehyun scratched the back of his neck while explaining. "Hope you like it"

You smiled enthusiastically at the two and moved towards them to give them a hug, "Thanks guys, i've been wanting it for a while"

Then came Yeonjun

"When we went to the mall you said you wanted a tnmt t-shirt sooo i got you one, your favorite turtle of course" He grinned already knowing he ate with his gift.

"LEONARDO" you squealed instantly wearing the slightly oversized t-shirt "I love it 'Jun thank youu" you jumped out of your seat and hugged him as well.

"Ooooh looks like someone has competition" Beomgyu teased wiggling his eyebrows at Soobin who just furrowed his brows and scowled at the latter shoving him. "Shut up"

Beomgyu just giggled, finding it fun to press Soobin's buttons. "Anywho, it's my turn. You'll definitely love my gift more than Yeonjun's" Beomgyu cockily proclaimed throwing his imaginary long hair back.

"No, you didn't"

"Yes i did"

"NO WAY"

You then frantically stood up and hugged Beomgyu jumping up and down with him laughing maniacally.

"YOU GOT ME A LITTLEST PET SHOP TOY YOU KNOW ME TOO WELLL"

The others watched you two with amused smiles, already accustomed to your antics. See, before Taehyun, Kai, Yeonjun and Soobin, you've always been awfully close with Beomgyu. Both of your parents grew up together. Both of you grew up together. Both of you are always together at the crime scene. Both of you are two peas in a pod.

Amidst the crackling atmosphere of joy and celebration a certain someone started to fiddle with his fingers, eyes focused on the cracks of the treehouse's floor. His face overflowing with doubt he failed to suppress.

"You good?" Yeonjun's question pulled him out of his thoughts. Soobin wordlessly nodded. Undoubtedly reading his mind, Yeonjun reassured his friend.

"Don't worry, im sure she'll love yours too" This helped Soobin regain a handful of confidence. He then silently thanked his friend with a nod and smile, grateful for his sincerity.

//

Soobin decided to give you your gift when everyone left. He offered to stay back and help you clean up the mess.

"You didn't have to stay" you said carefully taking down the paper streamers hanging on the walls and beam of the treehouse.

"It's okay.. Besides i was one of the people who made this mess" He reassured taking the other decorations you were holding and placed them on the empty box.

You then crouched down to pick up stray confetti from the ground.

"Thank you though.. I thought i did something wrong when everyone avoided me and acted all weird..." You admitted while absentmindedly folding, scrunching and tearing a piece of confetti you picked up.

You then felt Soobin's presence behind you. "I-i'm sure it's not much but.."

You turned around and stood up to face him. You tilted your head confused at what he was talking about and saw the small paper bag he was holding.

You curiously opened it and saw a thin red bracelet, with one big green bead carefully positioned between a few pink beads. He took it from the flimsy packaging and gently slipped it on your wrist tugging on the two strings to adjust the bracelet's size to your wrist.

He smiled when he tightened the bracelet admiring the way it looked on you. You on the other hand were flustered. The way his hands delicately held your arm, so soft and so warm yet so electric and terrifying.

Your heart was practically beating out of your chest, the fairy lights which was your only source of light, alongside the full moon, dimly lit his face. The way the light contoured his features, made you realize an undeniable fact.

Your friend Soobin was indeed pretty. Very, very pretty.

And seeing him smile so boyishly at your wrist, which was adorned by his bracelet filled your stomach with butterflies. But these unfamiliar and overwhelming feelings confused, startled and scared you all at the same time.

Not knowing what to do with yourself, you cleared your throat and swiftly pulled your hand away from his hold, tugging on your left ear and vehemently avoided his gaze. If you hadn't you would've seen Soobin's smile slowly fade and head sink.

"i-it's pretty" you whispered. "Huh?" Soobin raised his head up he almost got whiplash thinking he misheard your words. "I SAID IT'S PRETTY" you repeated a bit too loud. Making Soobin take a few steps back, looking flabbergasted. You felt your cheeks burn but you still somehow had the confidence to look at Soobin which proved to be fruitful since he was also very red.

He nervously chuckled and rubbed his neck. "That's good", he softly said, but not long after the poor boy then started to babble and overthink.

"I was worried it wasn't enough, since you know that others had crazy good gifts, i mean i was the one who suggested some of them, but i guess i forgot i had to give you one too so i didn't know what to-"

Then he felt you hug him tightly. "Thanks Bin, i love it" you whispered into the crook of his shoulder.

Soobin stayed still his arms moved around awkwardly, not knowing what to do. Should he hug you back? Place his arms around you? Is he being too stiff? He must be so uncomfortable to hug.

It was stupid, he thought, this wasn't really the first time you hugged, you always hugged each other whenever you said hello, you always hugged whenever you said goodbye and this definitely wasn't the first time since you also always hugged everyone when saying thank you.

But those barely lasted two seconds. This one felt special. This one wasn't just a casual one. This one lasted longer - like a lifetime. He felt like he was floating with the stars and couldn't stop smiling, that his cheeks started to hurt.

When she let go, he let out a breath he didn't even know he was holding.

She smiled at him and bid him goodbye for the night.

"See you tomorrow!"

Soobin could only smile crookedly and sheepishly wave back. He watched you climb your way down, walk towards your home, open your back door and get inside.

//

When he got home, Soobin did his night routine as usual. He washed his face, brushed his teeth, got his pajamas on and tucked himself in his bed. His bedroom window reflected the moons soft glow, which was comfortably accompanied by his star shaped nightlight.

But underneath the comfortable silence in his room with only the sound of the cicadas chirping and his electric fan whirring - but the sound of his heart beating a thousand miles an hour sounded louder, louder than before in a way he couldn't ignore anymore. He could've sworn that his whole house could hear. But most of all, he was scared that you, his best friend next door, would hear it too.

Little did he know, you were wrapped like a burrito under your covers, face bright red whilst trying to calm your racing heart down as well.

The bright and full moon was the only witness of your awkward yet endearing reactions.

February 2014

Rriinngggg

Cheers echoed from classroom to classroom, the sound of chairs collectively grating from people abruptly standing up, because everyone - students and teachers alike - were eager to finally get out of school.

"C'mon, let's go get tteokbokki!" Beomgyu waited jumping on his heels eager to meet up with your other friends, who were in the classroom next door.

"Wait, wait, let me pack my stuff-" you should've known better than to ask your friend to be patient when his patience was just as long as a kid during Christmas.

"You pack too slow, c'mon" Beomgyu shoved your pencil case, books and pens messily into your bag and carried it himself already wanting to get a move on.

"Lets get going now chop chop"

Beomgyu called out cackling as he took your bag and ran towards your other friends' classrooms collecting them like Pokémon.

"Give me my bag back!"

"Better take it from me you snail"

"Choi Beomgyu give me my- "

You couldn't finish your sentence because time seemed to move slower. And before you realized it you tripped over your own feet, a loud smack echoing through the hall as you face palmed the floor. Your four other friends (along with your other amused classmates and exasperated teachers) circled around you commenting on the situation.

"OH CRAP-"

"Beomgyu you're so dead."

"She'll have your head for sure now"

"HAHAHAHA"

"OMG Y/N IM SO SORRY - well technically it's not my fault since no one asked you to run and catch me but-"

Whilst laying on the ground contemplating your friendship with a certain someone you lifted your head up and just blankly stared at your friends who just stared back not knowing how to assess the situation without angering you more than you already are.

"Y/n, your nose is bleeding.." Huening pointed out the red fluid from your nose, that started to drip onto the floor.

.

"CHOI BEOMGYU"

Your piercing and echoing scream was one of the last things your classmates and teachers heard before they left the school, besides their polite and friendly farewells.

//

As damage control, the others collectively agreed to sit the two of you far away from each other. Beomgyu sat on one edge of the couch with Taehyun to his left and you sat on the floor, with a rolled paper tissue stuffed inside one of your nostrils, on the other side of the couch next to Soobin.

You all ate your tteokbokki in silence, still feeling awkward from the incident in school. If someone were to come in they'd only be met with chewing sounds, the whirring of the refrigerator and the hum of the air conditioner. A rare silence for a friend group like yours.

Breaking the silence Kai proposed playing Tekken, already pulling the CD out of the shelf, already expecting a collective approval (he was right about that).

He popped the CD in the console and connected the controllers.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, I Hueningkai, welcome you to our weekly - if not daily - Tekken Tournament" He announced, trying to make his voice sound deeper and more mature, mimicking your atypical showbiz host.

" Our first contestants.. Kang Taehyun vs Choi Yeonjun "

Taehyun walked forward dramatically towards the controllers, chest puffed out bowing to the others, who (except his opponent of course) were clapping

"Thank you, thank you, i appreciate your support, my dearest fans"

Then it was Yeonjun's turn for a show stopping entrance. He just turned around nodding his while holding the tip of his hat and then dramatically threw it towards somewhere in the living room. Opening his arms confidently he introduced himself

"It is I Choi Yeonjun, who will definitely win and dominate this tournament" He then smiled charmingly and winked at Kai who than acted flustered, holding his heart and playfully fawned over him

ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosshhh" Kai squealed in a high pitched voice "I'll be rooting for you Yeonjunnieee".

And so the Tekken Tournament started. You all fell into your usual rhythm, the one you were all too accustomed to. It felt so easy, so liberating. Like eating cotton candy in a fair, or swimming in the lake during the summer. It was the epitome of peak childhood. One that was too perfect, even for the movies.

You were all screaming, smashing those buttons for combos like there's no tomorrow, alliances were formed, so some of you even started sabotaging the opponents of the party you were rooting for.

Yeonjun started tickling Hueningkai when Taehyun was playing against the latter.

"HEY STOP TRYING TO MAKE ME MESS UP" Kai screamed while trying to swat Yeonjun's hands away and keep his character alive. Taehyun just cackled whenever Huening missed his combos or couldn't block.

after a while you were now finally in your finals. You vs Beomgyu.

Taehyun was giggling and trying to pinch your sides while you were playing against Beomgyu

"TAEHYUN DON'T BETRAY ME LIKE THIS" You squealed tilting your body in an awkward way just to protect yourself from his relentless attacks. "SOOBIN DON'T LET HIM SABOTAGE ME, HELP ME" Soobin just snickered but still complied trying to wrap his arms around the flailing Taehyun successfully pulling him back.

"YAH, that's so unfair, why do you always help Y/n?" Taehyun complained, it was such an offhand and playful comment but it hit Soobin right where it was sensitive. He felt his ears burn and he cleared his throat. "YEAH, YOU ALWAYS TAKE HER SIDE" Beomgyu pointed at Soobin, whilst pouting when he lost the game.

You unaware of the chaos just celebrated after officially winning your little tournament.

"In your face losers" you stuck your tongue out making a little victory dance jumping around with a wide grin.

Beomgyu grimaced at you still complaining about how unfair everything was, Taehyun and Kai were splayed on the floor trying to block out Beomgyu's persistent whining, Yeonjun was already browsing through their dvd's to see what they could watch.

But Soobin found himself admiring you, the way your hair flowed when you jumped, your little victory dance he has come to grow accustomed with through the years, your smile, the way your nose scrunched and-

"OooOOhHH Soobin's got hearty heart eyes for Y/n"

he didn't even realize he was staring at her with hearts in his eyes until Beomgyu pointed it out. This made you stop in your tracks, you looked at Soobin, who seemed petrified.

Meanwhile, he felt like his heart drop in his stomach. He wanted to be buried alive and never come back, why the hell did Beomgyu have to be so fucking loud? He wanted to just stuff used socks in his mouth so he wont be able to utter anything else.

Soobin didn't dare meet your eyes. Instead he just flipped Beomgyu off rolling his eyes, playing it cool. Luckily Yeonjun proposed watching Hunger Games and made you forget about Beomgyu‘s words. You shifted your attention and helped Yeonjun set up the TV.

"I'll get the snacks" Soobin announced standing up from the floor oblivious about how Taehyun silently got on his feet and followed.

After rummaging through the cabinets Soobin was ready to go back to the living room and join the others, but was startled when Taehyun was just standing behind him all this time and he never noticed.

"AACK" Soobin shrieked loudly. He flailed his hands to protect himself from the nonexistent threat, dropping the snacks in his hands in the process

"TAEHYUN? WHAT THE HELL YOU SCARED ME" Soobin smacked his friend's shoulder while wearing a distressed expression.

"You like her don't you" Taehyun said blatantly and so casually, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Soobin stood still, unresponsive as if the words haven't fully landed in his brain yet.

.

Once realization kicked in, Soobin laughed hysterically slapping Taehyun's shoulders. It was like his friend just said the funniest joke known to mankind.

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH Taehyun you can't be serious, that's like saying im going to be the leader of some successful boy group - IMPOSSIBLE"

After wiping his nonexistent tears, Soobin made his way back to the living room after picking up the stray snacks he dropped earlier. Taehyun was left in the kitchen with a raised brow.

"Oh well"

March 2018

17 years old

knock knock knock

"Y/nie sweetie, are you up yet? Soobin is already waiting for you to come down for school"

meanwhile..

you were snoring peacefully unbothered, still used to your sleeping schedule during your break.

knock knock knock

this time the knocks were more insistent. "LEAVE ME ALONE UGH" you groaned covering your face with your pillow trying to drown the noise.

"YAH!" Soobin screamed pulling your blankets the voice too deep and too loud to be your mothers.

Feeling the warmth of your blanket rudely stolen from you, you let out a squeal. "HEY, SOOBIN WHAT THE FUCK?" You glared at him (which was barely threatening since your hair was even worse than a birds nest and your cheeks were still puffy)

Soobin only rolled his eyes at your remark, used to your corning crankiness "Bro get up or we'll be late for school. Your mom's been literally trying to wake you up for a while, we‘re talking about 15 minutes and counting"

Your eyes widened at this - fuck, you literally forgot to set your alarm for today. First day back at school and it's already going shitty.

"OH CRUD - WAIT FOR ME I'LL BE BACK IN A BIT" you threw yourself out of bed, some of your poor plushies falling at the sheer force and speed.

Soobin just snickered and went downstairs grabbing the sandwich your mom made for your breakfast.

//

While rushing down the stairs, you buttoned your uniform up and hastily tied your hair into a bun. You then grabbed your bag near the couch and waved your mom goodbye.

"Bye Mom, see you later !"

Soobin waited for you to unlock your bike and you both made your way to school.

//

Luckily, you still got to school in time. "Thanks for waking me up 'Bin" you grinned at him whilst taking your shoes off to swap them for the indoor ones. Soobin just shrugged "Someone had to wake your lazy ass up - were you up late again? You were sleeping like a log" Upon hearing this, your smiled dropped in an instant. "I take my gratitude back"

Soobin just snickered at your reaction and closed his shoe locker. He then wordlessly handed you the sandwich your mom packed and forgot about. You just stared at it.

"What? You need an invitation?" Soobin raised a brow, flashing you a grin "Never mind, thank youu Soobinnn" you said in a sing song voice accepting the sandwich and stuffed it in your bag.

The two of you had to part ways since you were in separate classes. On your way to class you noticed a meek girl who looked lost and in a verge of tears.

"Hey" you gently tapped her shoulder , making her shriek startled by your sudden touch. This made you jump back taken aback. "Woah, im sorry for scaring you but um.. are you lost? can i help you?" you offered nicely, you found her cute though the way she was all fidgety it reminded you of Soobin when you were younger.

"H-hi, im new at this school and i really underestimated how huge the campus is" she stuttered, her head hanging low.

"No worries! I'll help you!" you grinned "Where do you have to go? Which class are you in?"

"2-C" the new girl answered. "2-C - Oh i have friends that go there too“ you rambled "well um, 2-C's classroom is right up ahead" you pointed at the other end of the hall. "You wont miss it since there's a sign hanging up near the door - don't worry" you heard the girl sighed softly and murmur "how did i miss those signs.." this made you laugh making the girl blush. "Huh?" she felt confused why you suddenly burst out laughing.

"Nothing, it's just you remind me of a friend of mine - it's nothing bad though don't worry" you reassured "Im y/n, what's your name?" you asked, curious to know more about this interesting person you met. "I-im Elizabeth - but you can call me Lizzy" she introduced giving you a sweet crooked smile. "Thanks for helping me.. i appreciate it"

after giving you one last wave Elizabeth quickly made her way towards her classroom.

//

Class was about to start in a few minutes and you were sat beside one of your best friends - Kai, behind you was Beomgyu and an empty seat.

"Oh c'mon now thats just unfair." Beomgy whined. "Why am I the one who has to sit alone?" "because you and i somehow always had class together since grade school." you rolled your eyes "and i wanna sit next to Huening - he's nice" you side hugged Kai who just smiled in response leaning into your touch and stuck a tongue out at Beomgyu glare at him playfully squaring up "You trynna fight?!" Beomgyu stood up, his chair scraping leaving a shrill sound.

He glared down at Kai. But once the latter stood up and towered over him Beomgyu felt himself shrink. "You sure you wanna fight?" Kai grinned. You just snorted at their antics "Oof, he got you there 'Gyu - he got you there" you clapped praising Kai, relishing in Beomgyu's pouty face. Deciding that the humiliation isn’t worth it he decided to sit down crossing his arms and pettily refusing to look at both of you. "Hmpf - im moving to the others class since im clearly not wanted here"

You were about to tease him again when your teacher silently walked in the classroom, her demanding presence and stern aura was enough to silence the bustling classroom. Students rushed to their seats and stopped conversing with each other in an instant.

"Good Morning class." She greeted, with a calm voice. The teacher turned around and wrote her name on the board. Miss Kim it said.

"I hope we have a highly educational and prosperous year, i have high expectations for every single one of you. Now before we begin, a new student will be joining us in our academic journey this year - come in "

A tall, slender figure appeared. He walked in with a straight posture, his hands resting on his sides

"Good morning, i'm Jungwon. I hope to have a nice year with you all" his voice was chirpy, and his visuals were undeniably breathtaking, especially those dimples that were hard to miss. It didn't take long for your classmates to start gushing and whispering about him.

"He looks like he'd never cut corners"

"He's definitely a teacher's pet"

"Oh my god he looks so cute - look at his dimples!"

"He kinda looks like he'd ask the teacher why we didn't get any homework" Beomgyu whispered to you and Kai.

Ms. Kim shushed the class, clearly disdained about the hushed whispers in her classroom.

"Sit next to Choi Beomgyu" She gestured towards your now frozen friend.

Upon hearing this, Beomgyu pointed at himself with wide eyes feeling baffled. This made Kai snicker "She must've heard him" You tried to suppress a laugh, not wanting to get in trouble and playfully shoved Kai.

"Make sure you help Jungwon get used to his surroundings and show him around the campus - it's easy to get lost if you're new" Your teacher added leaving no room for discussion.

//

Class seemed to drone on. Even though it was just the first day, Ms. Kim didn't hesitate to start torturing you with math.

Someone in the back was playing on his phone hiding it behind his book, two girls near your seats were whispering about something and you only counted down the minutes, until the bell rang.

After what seemed like eternity, the bell blared loudly setting every student free from the shackles of their tedious lessons.

"Ahh FINALLY" Kai sighed beside you slumping on his desk "I swear im good at math, but honestly i think i left that genius last year."

Beomgyu just let out a snort "Riightt, says the one who didn't know that the square root of 121 is 11" Kai's lips tugged into a small pout as he felt his pride get trampled on "HEY I WAS SLEEPY OKAY"

You just shook your head chuckling softly to yourself. Amidst the chaos a silent figure waited patiently behind Beomgyu his hands tucked into his pockets. You nudged your friend silently reminding him of his responsibility he seemed to have forgotten. But Beomgyu was too engrossed in complaining about Ms. Kim's strict teaching methods.

But when Beomgyu stayed unresponsive due to his selective hearing, so you decided to take matters in your own hands

"Sorry Jungwon, you see Beomgyu over here is a bit slow" you gave Beomgyu a warning glare as if saying "get it together now and treat him nicely" to which Beomgyu just rolled his eyes at. Jungwon on the other hand let out a small chuckle. "It's the first day of school i'll cut him some slack"

Beomgyu feeling ganged up on murmured "Well, i'll see you later in the cafeteria" unenthusiastic as he lead Jungwon towards the door.

//

When you and Kai arrived in the cafeteria, you found your friends in your usual spot. It was the table near a corner, the gigantic ceiling to floor window reflected the sunlight and displayed the blooming trees that scattered across your school's yard.

"Hii guys - how was class?" you asked as you arrived at the table hugging them one by one. "We're so lucky we have Mr Jeon as our class teacher" Taehyun's statement made you envious, Mr Jeon was an English teacher who always made class so much more tolerable, picking out interesting themes making his lessons less monotone unlike Ms Kim. "Luckyyyy" you groaned, as you sat down next to Taehyun.

"Where's Beomgyu?" Soobin curiously asked, who was sat opposite of you and was busy munching on carrots. "He has to give the new kid a tour of the school" Kai stated as he took a seat as well, setting his tray on the table.

"Oh speaking of new students, we also have one" Yeonjun added, as he slurped his noodles "what's her name again?" "Elizabeth" Taehyun answered. And as if the world knew you were talking about her, you then saw her walking awkwardly through the crowd, sheepishly looking for a free table.

"LIZZY!" you called over, waving your hand to catch her attention. Her eyes immediately flicked towards your direction, instantly recognizing your voice. She smiled as she held eye contact with you "Come sit with us" you beckoned her over patting the empty spot next to you.

After settling down, Kai didn't waste time to greet her "Hi there, names Kai" he smiled brightly at her "Whats up, im Yeonjun" Yeonjun introduced himself flashing his usual grin, finding it amusing when she avoided his gaze and her cheeks reddened.

"Don't scare her now" Beomgyu teased, arriving with Jungwon tagging alongside him. "Scooch over" Beomgyu said not waiting for a response recklessly pushed Yeonjun to make some space for himself. The sudden action made Yeonjun accidentally shove Soobin who was next to him and about to sip some of his soup "YAH- you almost made me spill my soup" Soobin scolded.

"Can't you guys be normal for once?" Taehyun pinched his nose sighing deeply. Beomgyu just rolled his eyes "Why is everyone so dramatic" He then took the opportunity to introduce their new classmate "anyway this is our new buddy Jungwon "

"Hi, nice to meet you all" Jungwon then flashed a warm smile, his gaze flickering towards Elizabeth a beat too long. He didn't hesitate to take the spot next to the meek girl, who visibly stiffened and gripped on her chopsticks tighter than before. Noticing this you asked her in a whisper " You okay?" She sunk her head low, cheeks burning "Y-yes im fine" she said in a meek whisper.

It didn't take long for everyone to find their rhythm and find conversations to partake in, amidst the chewing and slurping.

"Hey 'Bin, did you know 'Won also loves playing ball. At first I didn't like him since he looked like someone who'd tell the teacher about forgetting homework, but he's actually a fun guy-" Beomgyu, droned on and on about how Jungwon would be the perfect gaming buddy. You were animatedly conversing with Jungwon who was laughing at the story and Elizabeth who was listening intently. while Yeonjun was telling Taehyun and Kai about that squirrel he almost ran over on his way to school.

And simply like spring, your friend group started to grow along side the blossoming flowers that are growing out of the supple and dewy grass.

April 2017

Ever since school has been eating your free time, you didn't have much time to spend with your friends after school. So when the opportunity finally came Beomgyu didn't hesitate to invite everyone out to his home. What better than playing video games while scarfing down greasy pizza.

"Soo is everybody ready for our traditional Tekken tournament??" Kai screamed enthusiastically. Everyone hooted and hollered in agreement. The air was charged with competitiveness especially since the winner and second runner up will get a 5x-packet of ramen.

And as the lineup was formed, the battle begun.

First up - Kai against Beomgyu.

"Im sorry Kai - i know we're friends but, all is fair in love and ramyeon" Beomgyu faked a sympathetic tone, but Kai just smirked in response unaffected "We'll see, we'll see"

As their characters intensely fought and dodged, they immediately set the bar high with their skills.

"Woah - Kai is keeping up with Beomgyu - who would've thought?" Yeonjun chuckled amused by how the game was progressing

With how cocky Kai answered Beomgyu's bluff, you would think he would at least have some skill right?

"NOOOOO" Kai wailed throwing his body on the ground, as he failed to block Beomgyu's avatar's punch. Meanwhile his opponent sprung up doing a celebratory dance his hands flailing around "I swear, how can you still be so bad after playing so long?". Kai just grumbled in response And to think this was just the beginning of an intense round of Tekken.

Everyone has their turn and night has fallen in a blink of an eye, but the sound of teenagers screaming and cheering loudly didn't seem to waver. The once full pizza boxes were now empty and discarded haphazardly across the floor accompanied by cans of various sodas.

You were seated on the floor alongside Elizabeth and Jungwon who were too caught up in their own world, having a hushed conversation about something you couldn't catch, Yeonjun was laying on the floor already feeling bored after having lost at round 3, while Kai was making Ramen with Taehyun and Soobin was laying on the couch, scrolling mindlessly on his phone.

But even though everyone's attention was already drifting away except the ones fighting who would be worth enough to get that pack of ramen. To make this better (or worse, depending on how you would see it) the last ones standing were you and Beomgyu.

The tension was palpable and everyone was at the edge of their seats as you and Beomgyu relentlessly smashed those buttons as if they had insulted you and your bloodline in its past life.

You were too engrossed on the screen you didn't realize Taehyun who has come back from cooking, creeping up behind you.

"GAAH" you screamed loosing your concentration because of Taehyun's tickling - dirty tactic. The benefactor (Beomgyu) only cackled loudly boasting how "VICTORY IS MINE"

Soobin who was previously engrossed with his phone tilted his head up, lips tugging up at the familiar sight of his friends bickering. "That tactic is so lame" he said standing up, ready to step in.

But before he could reach out, someone else was quicker. Jungwon was quicker.

"HEY - NO!" Taehyun complained letting out a string of laughter as he was forcefully ripped away from you. Finally free of distraction you could still hit those combos and successfully Ko-ed Beomgyu's avatar

"YESSS" you sprung up celebrating "in your face you cheating loser" hugged Jungwon as you both laughed like hyenas while jumping in circles.

Beomgyu just pouted "You don't have to rub it in" not feeling any sort of remorse you continued to rub in your victory and stuck your tongue out, eliciting collective laughter from across the room. But one person's smile didn't quite reach his eyes.

Soobin felt an uncomfortable tug in his stomach, but before he could dwell on it further he shook his head dismissing it and walked towards you instead.

"Mind sharing that with me?" Soobin asked ruffling your hair. "Duh" you answered still riding that high of successfully beating your friend.

It was nice to forget about your responsibilities and just have fun with all of your best friends.

The weekend was gone within a blink of an eye and now you were back trapped behind the scorching gates of hell - school.

Sipping on your milk carton you watched your friend Lizzy fumble with her fingers, looking so nervous you'd think she was on death row. Raising your brow you called out her name snapping her out of her trance.

Elizabeth visibly stiffened but then meekly asked "C-can i tell you something?" this caught your attention, Elizabeth has always been a shy and nervous person, but right now it's like 10 times worse than usual.

"Sure" you answered, without hesitation. Taking a deep breath, Elizabeth shakily whispered something you couldn't get. You asked her to repeat it again but it was still too hushed. "Can you repeat that i couldn't-" "I LIKE YANG JUNGWON" she said it a bit louder than you expected, that other passing students looked at the two of you with weirded out expressions.

"YOU WHAT?" you stood up excitedly from the bench but Elizabeth who was redder than a tomato just hushed you trying to pull you back down to your seat, embarrassed about the growing whispers and judging looks around you due to the commotion.

"Don't - please don't tell anyone i just- i just i wanted your help for something, but you better promise not to laugh okay?" you nodded impatiently waiting for her to explain herself.

"I want your help to write a love letter for Jungwon" You couldn't refuse such a tender request, besides you were quite confident in your cupid abilities. The years of consuming cheesy hallmark movies and dramas will definitely pay off.

Taking out a piece of paper and a pen, you started to brainstorm with your friend.

"What do you want to write to him?"

no response.

Elizabeth seemed to short circuit - her brain seemed to be full of Jungwon but empty at the same time.

"How about this, what do you like the most about him ? Lets start with that"

Elizabeth who was sheepish before started to shamelessly count down things she found endearing about Jungwon. "I love his dimples, oh god they just look so beautiful whenever he smiles - like his smile alone is enough to melt me but since it's paired with those dimples UGH im dead" You smiled fondly as you watched your friend be hopelessly in love while writing down the points she mentioned. You totally understood why she found Jungwon's dimples, because whenever Soobin flashes that dimply smile, you feel that tingle in your stomach as well and-

"Y/n? are you still with me?" Elizabeth giggled finding you spacing out funny. "I thought i lost you there for a second"

You cleared your throat feeling heat creep up your neck. "I was just- um.." the thoughts you just had.. why did they suddenly pop out, you were supposed to be thinking about how to help your friend write a love letter not Soobin - what does he have to do with this.

"Don't mind me - what else do you wanna add?" you tried to switch the topic, luckily Elizabeth didn't press further.

As you both counted down things to write in this letter you were suddenly interrupted by the one who was not supposed to see it.

"Hi guys!" Jungwon chirpily greeted you two, his gaze lingering towards Elizabeth a tick too long. Reacting quickly you stuffed the letter inside your notebook hoping he didn't see or suspect anything.

" 'won whats good?" you greeted back with a nervous laugh. Elizabeth on the other hand was like a deer caught in headlights her ears red.

"Are you okay 'Liz?" Jungwon asked worried placing a hand on the girl's shoulder. "IM OKAY" Lizzy answered standing up abruptly and before Jungwon could ask why the hell you two were so weird the bell rang.

"Oh would you look at that, lunch is over we wouldn't want to be late to class right Yn?" Elizabeth said, her voice an octave too high. You didn't have time answer since you were hastily dragged away your bag barely on your shoulders, leaving a very confused Jungwon behind.

When school ended Jungwon tried to find where Yn went after his cleaning duty. Seeing Beomgyu and the others passing by he chose to ask them

"Have you guys seen Yn?" Jungwon asked

"She's probably in the library" Kai answered not lifting his head from his game console.

"No - it's Thursday she doesn't have library duty today" Taehyun corrected.

"Just look for Soobin - it's much more convenient" Beomgyu waved off "He's taller" this made the others snort. Jungwon was a bit baffled by the weird suggestion but didn't question it. After thanking them he made his way towards the bike parking area and surely enough, he immediately saw Soobin and surprise, surprise, you were right behind him.

Maybe Beomgyu was right, this was more convenient.

As he jogged towards the two of you, Jungwon called your names making you turn around towards the sound.

"Jungwon, what's up?" Soobin greeted him. "Can i borrow Yn for a second, it wont take long promise" Jungwon nudged you, waiting for your answer. You looked at Soobin who just nodded reassuringly "Take your time, i'll wait"

After agreeing you let Jungwon whisk you away. "So what's this about?" you asked. Jungwon scratched the back of his neck smiling awkwardly "You see, I wanted to ask you before at lunch, but you see.. I- i need your help". You raised a brow feeling your lips tug into a grin.

Well that just sounded all too familiar "Let me guess, you want me to play cupid" "Yes- i mean - wow - how did you know?" Jungwon was surprised at how you completely read him. "Im not too obvious aren't i?" the boy felt now self-conscious "Don't worry, i got your back what should i help you with?"

//

After you walked away with Jungwon, Soobin was left all alone with your bikes and most of all his thoughts. He felt his grip on your bikes' handles tighten. What did Jungwon want to talk to you about, that he wasn't supposed to hear? The curiosity was gnawing at him as he checked his watch every few seconds. What could you possibly be talking about that's taking so long?

But when he saw you come back, he felt his shoulders relax. This is silly, he thought, you were his best friend after all. You'll always be by his side just like he'll stay by yours.

"Sorry for the wait" you apologized, taking your bike back and mounting it. Soobin shook his head and reassured you that it was not a big deal.

Even while you drove home he still couldn't help but still feel that spark of curiosity, and he couldn't stop himself from asking, surely you'd tell him right? "What'd Jungwon talk to you about?" he asked trying to sound casual. You just shrugged him off with a growing smile "It's nothing, you'll find out soon enough though" Your answer wasn't what he was expecting at all. He felt his shoulders tense and gripped his bike's handle tighter.

"Last one up has to make ramyeon!" you declared speeding up. Your sudden challenge made Soobin forget about anything else and he just grinned accepting your challenge. This wasn't the first time after all.

//

When you got to Soobin's room you immediately threw yourself onto his bed burying your face into one of his pillows. "Why can't we just have spring break now" you groaned. Soobin rolled his eyes in response, a grin making its way up his lips. "You're here to study, not slack off" He playfully scolded you. He then threw you a small pack of salted peanuts - your favorite brain snack. Happily accepting his offer you sat up and opened the pack popping a few peanuts in your mouth, instantly feeling energized.

"Then lets get working"

You pulled your stuff out your bag and made yourself comfortable on the floor, snagging Soobin's bed tray table.

The next few hours were filled with comfortable silence. Once in a while one of you asks the other about some equation or topic you didn't understand.

Feeling your legs get numb and your throat dry you stood up to recharge. But you accidentally knocked down the flimsy bed tray table spilling all your papers and pens.

Soobin turned around from his desk because of the commotion. "Shit - whatever i'll pick it up later." you muttered "You want anything from the kitchen?" you asked Soobin who just shook his head in response.

When you left Soobin made his way towards the mess you made, letting out a small endeared chuckle "You'll never stop being clumsy, will you?" he said to no one in particular.

As he tidied up, a piece of paper caught his eye.

Things i like about you:

"Your dimples - oh god they just look so beautiful whenever you smile. like your smile alone is enough to melt me but since it's paired with those dimples UGH im dead"

Soobin held his breath - was this a letter for someone you admired? Can he dare hope you were you talking about him? He couldn't stopthe smile tugging his lips. Dimples? cute? his hands subconsciously drifted towards his cheeks, tracing that familiar dip on his face.

"I didn't know you could be this cheesy Yn" he giggled. Despite his attempts on keeping calm, he couldn't deny his racing heart that was about to leap out of his chest.

"And when you play basketball, the way you keep the team together and how you always shoot clean shots"

An amused chuckle slipped from his lips - since when did he play basketball?

Oh, right - He doesn't.

he doesn't play basketball.

which means this letter isn't for him.

Soobin froze the letter suddenly feeling heavier than a bag filled with stones. But before he could swallow that lump in his throat he heard you shuffling up the stairs. He hastily shoved that damned piece of paper in one of your notebooks. And as he heard his door creak open he tripped on his way back to his desk, face planting on his carpet.

"You good?" you snorted, finding the situation funny, when Soobin was in fact trying to hold his cracking heart together.

"It's fine - i'm okay" Soobin blurted, trying to gather his jumbled thoughts.

You just raised a brow as you sat back down on your spot. "Weirdo" you snickered.

Soobin only awkwardly laughed in response, trying to shift his focus back to his studies. But no matter how hard he tried, his mind drifted towards that letter against his will. Letting out a quiet sigh he leaned against his chair while sneaking a small glance at you before forcing himself to focus on his paper.

//

The endless abyss of practice equations has finally taken its toll on you leaving you exhausted and sleepy.

You couldn‘t help the drooping of your eyes. Just one second you thought, just one…

Soobin who was also starting to feel a strain in his neck wanted to take a break. A little ramyeon break wouldn‘t hurt right?

Taking his headphones out he turned around to ask you if you were hungry as well but instead of seeing your concentrated face he was met with your peaceful figure, slumped on the bed tray table, hair messily tied in a ponytail that was almost undone.

The sun had long set, the sound of cicadas and his electric fan whirring were the only things that filled the silence.

Soobin couldn‘t help but feel drawn to you and before he realized it he was already kneeling before you.

“Always so hard working.“ he muttered voice laced with admiration. His eyes trailed at the stacks of paper you had completed, but then his gaze flickered towards your face.

He had seen you sleep multiple times before, heck he‘d seen you drool and snore in your sleep. And each and everytime he whispers the same thing to himself.

“Even in your sleep, you still look beautiful“

Soobin‘s lips tugged up as his hand reached for the stray strands of your hair that obscured his full view.

His touch was feather light, but it left a blazing trail of warmth in it‘s wake making you shift in your sleep.

Soobin froze, his breath hitching. But when you didn‘t show signs of waking up he relaxed once more.

But the longer he stared, the louder his doubts grew. He felt his restraint crumbling, so he reluctantly pulled his hand away, already craving that familiar touch not even a second later.

You weren‘t his to hold, you made that clear in that letter. He should stop before things spiral out of control.

//

When Soobin went downstairs, you let out the breath you didn't realize you've been holding. You didn't let yourself dwell on his words and hastily packed your things.

You felt like you couldn't breathe.

Out.

You needed to get out.

As you reached the staircase you mentally prepared yourself, taking in a deep breath. You'll just sneak out, quietly through the front door, since you guessed Soobin would be in the kitchen - easy peasy right?

wrong.

Your hands already hovered above the front door's handle, when you suddenly heard Soobin's voice behind you.

"Where are you going? I thought you were asleep." Soobin asked his hand still holding onto a pack of ramen. Shit - was he making you dinner?

"I thought we'd still eat, since you know, i lost earlier" he softly chuckled. You bit your lip, feeling ashamed at running away. But staying felt like willingly jumping in cold water.

"I- i wasn't feeling hungry" you said "besides, i don't want to intrude any longer" you winced as that lame excused left your tongue. This house was basically your second home - you had your own slippers for heavens sake. Soobin must've caught that too but he didn't press and wished you good night, hugging you goodbye.

This made you tense up, harder than a rock. Why did it suddenly feel so different. You always hugged Soobin. Clearing your throat you pulled away and wished him good night as well.

Weirdly enough your walk home was calm, you unlocked your house door and slipped off your shoes making your way up to your room just like how you do it everyday. But when you closed your door you leaned against the frame, your shaky hand reaching towards your chest.

badum badum badum

Your chest felt tight, and your stomach felt like a rollercoaster. Sliding down you covered your mouth, the warmth on your neck and cheeks was enough to burn.

Your best friend likes you.

No - this can't be. Soobin has always been your best friend, a constant in your life ever since that summer when you were seven.

How could that just change because of a few words? This was too much - too fast that your head felt like it was spinning.

You curled further into yourself.

"What's happening to us?"

It has been a few days since that night and you've managed to keep yourself in wraps whenever you were in Soobin's vicinity. He hasn't said anything about it yet so you assumed he's never noticed

"Right now's not about me" you thought "I have to help someone now." you thought to yourself as you opened the door.

The cafe was just as Jungwon described. Cozy and inviting. Industrial pendant lights that hung low littered the ceilings, their warm light giving the cafe a certain glow. And despite being in your town’sshopping district it wasn’t all too busy.

On the table near the cashier was one student surrounded by piles of paper and on the spot near the window a man was working on his laptop, his coffee getting cold on the table.

After scanning the room you finally spotted Jungwon who seemed to be zoning out as he sipped on his frappuccino.

“Hey“ you tapped the boy‘s shoulder who jumped in surprised, abruptly pulled from wherever his thoughts were drifting.

“Hey to you too“ he greeted.

“You ready to win Lizzy‘s heart?” you asked accepting the drink he had bought for you. But Jungwon just fiddled with his rings. You found it cute how your two friends were too oblivious about their crush on each other, but playing cupid was fun.

“whats up with you? You’ve been zoning out before i even got here” you nudged Jungwon who sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. “I just.. I don’t wanna mess it up you know - i don’t want to make her uncomfortable.”

You shook your head suppressing the urge to reveal the truth. They deserved to hear it from each other’s lips. Instead you took his hand into yours. “Hey, the way you’re being so considerate of her feelings just shows how sincere you are. Besides that’s why im here - your personal cupid” Jungwon seemed to feel lighter after hearing your words, his shoulders straightening and his eyes regained its sparkle.

You spent the past half an hour brainstorming possible proposals and it has been quite fruitless. Jungwon turned out to be pickier than you thought

“We can decorate a poster with a cute pun?”

“no that’s so cliché”

“how about this one - it’s simple and romantic”

“it’s just tacky..”

Another half an hour passed and you still haven’t found a solution.

“This is hopeless” Jungwon groaned, slamming his head on the table. When the sound of your laughter rang in his ears Jungwon just pouted “Hey, this is a serious issue you know” You just shook your head taking a sip of your drink

“No, it’s just you just reminded me of Soobin - You know, he often does that too” Jungwon raised his brow “one time he was stuck on a math problem and smacked his head on his paper and when he raised his head, his forehead was covered in equations. You should’ve seen his face. I had to help him scrub the ink off and by the end of it his forehead was so red. He looked so cute and-”

wait.

Frozen like a deer in headlights, you felt your heart beat out of your chest, Because you couldn’t believe the words that slipped from your lips without meaning to. And the way Jungwon was looking at you with a growing grin, didn’t help the blush that was creeping up your neck.

You could already feel what Jungwon was about to say next so you interrupted him before he shattered the illusion

"He's just my friend" you retorted

But something inside you ached when you called Soobin as just your friend. It used to be the most normal thing in the world, you've introduced him to other people like that for as long as you can remember. But now it leaves a bitter taste in your mouth

Why were you thinking about Soobin in that way? The Soobin, you’ve been friends with since you were seven, the one who can’t sleep without a night light or remember his timetable?

You found yourself shrinking into the chair covering your flustered face. You couldn't trust yourself to speak right now. And Jungwon seemed to understand, smiling softly.

But maybe, your eyes have finally started to notice what has been in front of you all this time

Unbeknownst to you a certain someone spotted you and Jungwon chatting while passing down the street.

“Since when did they start hanging out alone?“ Soobin muttered under his breath feeling the pit in his stomach grow bigger the longer he looked. He wanted tear his gaze away and get on his way, Beomgyu and Yeonjun were waiting for him in the computer cafe, but he was curious. Too curious. Questions seem to be popping inside his head like popcorn - quick and erratic. And before he knew it, his legs were taking him towards the cafés entrance.

And although his heart was burning for answers he still hesitated and his hand hovered above the café’s door handle. He shouldn‘t be spying on you, besides this was none of his business. You could hang out with whomever you liked, whenever you liked.

“Well are you going in or not?“ Startled by the stranger’s sudden presence, Soobin let out a yelp. “U-um- yeah i was just-” The customer just shook his head and went in annoyed. After contemplating for a few more minutes he swallowed his pride and whispered to himself

“I’ll go out after a minute, im just making sure she‘s okay“

it didn‘t sound convincing at all.

He decided to sit a few tables back, just enough to see you but not enough to hear you.

Why didn‘t you tell him about it? Is this why you've been acting weird ever since your study session?

Why were you laughing like that? What did Jungwon possibly say to make you laugh so hard, he's got you throwing your head back?

He noticed how the two of you were close but he didn't realize you were this close. Was this perhaps... a date?

He clenched his fists, the sting of his nails digging in his palm felt nothing like the flickering flame in his chest. “She‘d definitely prefer the amusement park“ he huffed in disapproval.

The longer he watched a barista approached him intending to take his order. He blindly picked out a drink not even checking what it was, his eyes were too busy trying to gauge what you were talking about.

When his drink arrived he took a quick sip, but the sharp and unpleasant taste brought him out of his trance.

Then he saw it, your flustered self shrinking into the chair. The way you covered your face and how Jungwon was softly smiling at you.

He felt something inside him break. He'd always prided himself into knowing you the best out of anyone else in this world. Besides he wasn't the only one who thought that way - everyone around you seemed to agree.

He'd seen you when you lost a competition you've poured your heart and soul in, he's always the first to know when something big happens like when you got accepted into this one program you were dying to get in to. So why?

why wasn't it him sitting across you right now, relishing in your flustered and unguarded self?

Soobin clenched his jaw - he couldn't stay any longer. Before he could dwell on it any longer his legs already moved on their own, exited the cafe and headed towards his actual destination along dragging his heavy heart along.

As you conversed with Jungwon your eyes caught one particular customer who left swiftly, as if running away from something. The only proof of him having been there was the high pitched ringing of the door chime.

When Jungwon tapped your shoulder, asking why you just spaced out, you just shook your head - it couldn't have been him.

Maybe it was your mind playing cruel tricks on you.

"YAH COVER FOR ME, COVER FOR ME!" "JUST WAIT FOR A SECOND YOU IDIOT" even being just a mere few meters away from the computer café he could already hear Beomgyu and Yeonjun's bickering. He couldn't help but let out a small amused huff.

some things will never change he thought, as he went in that familiar place, one he has spent hundreds of hours in since childhood.

Minutes blurred into hours. Countless rounds and five packets of chips later, the three decided to have an ice cream break at the convenience store nearby. The owner greeted them with a sense of familiarity. It was inevitable though, having seen them as tiny gremlins that have slowly grown into teenage zombies, that were now at least a head taller than him.

"Mr. Hannn" Beomgyu called out in his usual chirpy voice, placing their orders on the counter. The older man just glared at the boy scolding him "Keep it down - always being so loud tsk" but if you looked closely you would notice the slight curve of his lips.

Meanwhile Yeonjun and Soobin waited for Beomgyu outside, relishing in the cool spring breeze. Maybe it was the stillness and the comfort of it all that made Soobin suddenly ask.

"Can you teach me basketball?" Yeonjun turned to him a grin appearing in his face "Since when did you like basketball?" he was expecting some sort of jab but instead of teasing him back Soobin just shifted his gaze back to the empty street muttering a small never mind. " I was just joking man, let's meet up tomorrow by the court after school." Yeonjun smiled at Soobin reassuringly playfully nudging his shoulder. And this time Soobin smiled back.

"WHOSE READY FOR ICE CREAMM" Beomgyu's loud shrill broke that soft atmosphere, replacing it instantly with his typical chaotic one.

Yeonjun just snorted saying something about how Beomgyu was a megaphone in his past life, the latter pouting in response leaning on Soobin for help.

And so the boys fell into their usual routine, one that has somehow weaved itself without them realizing.

Just three boys who sat in front of the convenience store, eating ice popsicle during a spring night, while they chatted over anything and everything.

And just as promised Yeonjun fulfilled Soobin's strange request.

"When you throw, your hands should drop down like a snake - STOP why are you pushing it like you're about to give it a high five? This is a basketball court not a volleyball court-" Yeonjun mentored strictly, making Soobin start to regret asking the vice captain of the schools basketball team for training.

Despite the taunting corrections, Soobin just waved him off with a grin "That was a fluke i was just warming up" Yeonjun's eyes almost rolled to the back of his head after hearing his friends ridiculous reasoning

Even after Yeonjun's incessant drilling and coaching, Soobin barely managed to shoot a single shot.

Yeonjun couldn't stifle his exasperated laugh. Pinching his nose he tried to figure out if his mentoring wasn't good enough or Soobin simply didn't have an athletic bone in his body. It was most likely the latter...

"All that height, and you can't manage to score" Yeonjun cackled as Soobin missed another shot, hitting the board making the ball bounce straight into his face.

"OW" Soobin tumbled back holding onto his nose. Yeonjun just let out a loud laugh, sensing the growing hopelessness for he situation. "Maybe you should just give it up".

"No."

Soobin's refusal came out a bit too quick for his liking. Trying to play it cool, he acted unaffected and crouched down to pick up the ball, not wasting anytime to continue practicing.

Yeonjun sat on the side of the court and watched his friend silently. After every missed shot, he could see the way Soobin's shoulder tensed, growing stiffer after every failed attempt.

He couldn't help but notice something off about Soobin's sudden determination.

"Taking five wouldn't hurt you know?" Yeonjun teased, but his eyes carefully watched his friend's reaction.

"Why can't I just throw a ball into a fucking basket?" Soobin cursed too consumed by his failed attempts, to hear his friend.

Seeing no other way to catch his attention Yeonjun pried the ball out of Soobin's hands asking him while looking him dead in the eye.

"Whats up with you?" Soobin deliberately avoided Yeonjun's gaze, resorting to fiddling with his fingers instead. Seeing how his friend wouldn't budge he continued "Staying quiet won't do anything you know?"

The silence hung heavy in the air when Yeonjun uttered those words.

But from the distance both of the boys saw your familiar figure headed towards them with a huge smile. "I'll grab something from the convenience store - be back in five" Yeonjun nudged his friend leaving him in the basketball court.

Soobin couldn't respond, his friend's words having struck a chord inside him.

But when he felt your arms around him, he felt the heavy weight in his chest press harder.

"'What brings you here?" He asked after pulling away, clearing his throat.

You explained how you were on your way to Lizzy's house and then saw him. You started to ramble about that cat you saw on your way, and how you tripped on a pot hole. But Soobin was only half-listening, only answering with an occasional oh and hm.

He should get himself together, he didn't know why Yeonjun's words had stuck with him as much as they did. He should just-

"Bin?" He hadn't realized you were calling him until you nudged him "I'm sorry - i was just - what were you saying?"

You let out a soft chuckle, it was not uncommon for Soobin to be three planets away on a random day so you didn't think much of it.

"I was just telling you how i tripped on that pot hole near my house - what about you? Are you playing basketball? " pointing at the ball in his hands. Soobin felt himself hesitate as he nodded in agreement.

"Wow, Soobin and basketball - who would've thought" you teased, playfully nudging him.

Those words sounded like chalk scratching on a board. Soobin couldn't help but poke his cheek with his tongue as he felt his grip tightening on the ball, that his veins started to show.

"Okay, and?" he huffed, his tone was sharp and cold "A guy can't try new things now?" The words left his tongue before he could fully process them.

The air between you was suddenly thick, no one daring to break the silence. You and Soobin always joked with each other, but this time it was different.

Instead of that warm tingling feeling in your stomach, it illicit this uncomfortable churn.

The afternoon breeze suddenly felt too cold, the sound of the laughing children nearby didn't feel warm at all. You didn't understand why Soobin was acting like this. Did you say something wrong? Maybe he was just in a bad mood - no, the Soobin you knew wouldn't just lash out like that.

Pursing your lips together, you gave him a weak smile not wanting to inconvenience him further "Well, im just- im just gonna get going now" you slowly backed away headed to your original destination.

Soobin didn't move. It wasn't until you turned at the corner that the dam he had so desperately tried to keep sealed came crashing down. His grip on the basketball grew tighter, as if he wanted to make it explode. His mind was reeling his thoughts in disarray, that he didn't know what to do with himself.

And like a kettle reaching its boiling point Soobin finally let out a loud scream hurling the ball against the backboard.

"You're such a fucking asshole, Choi Soobin"

The object bounced back with just as much force, hitting him directly in his chest. Wincing at the impact he got on his knees curling himself into a ball.

"You're such an asshole Choi Soobin" he repeated, but this time it came out as a defeated whisper.

Tick. tick. tick.

Time passed and the moon was at its peak. Everyone has drifted towards dreamland, but here he was, wide awake. Why couldn’t he just get that stupid letter out of his head? Why was he acting like this? He’s always had everything under control, his studies, his routine, his feelings - so why did he lash out like that? It wasn’t even your fault.

The sight of your hurt face as you retreated and how your voice grew quieter, were enough to make his heart twist uncomfortably.

You have always been sunshine, reeling people in by just smiling. God your smile, was his favorite trait of yours, besides your cute cheeks or was it how you’re much shorter than him -

Soobin sighed curling further into the sheets. For fucks sake why can’t he just get you out of his head and be a good friend. Your best friend. But the more he tried to convince himself that it was enough, the tighter his chest felt.

“God what’s wrong with me?” Soobin sighed as he lay on his bed, safely tucked in, but ironically enough he has never felt so exposed before.

You were free to like anyone you wanted to. Who was he to tell you to not like someone?

The weather was perfect for grilling, which was why Yeonjun proposed a BBQ at his home.

You initially hesitated, since you knew he'll be there too. Even though a week has passed, you were still confused about everything. You thought Soobin felt the same way you did, but after that outburst you weren't so sure anymore.

You sighed heavily at Lizzy's pleads to accompany her. "C'mon pleeassee we'll have fun together promise - besides you shouldn't let those doubts stop you from bonding with your friends" She reasoned, and you knew she wouldn't give up anytime soon. The moment you got to her house last week, you immediately told her everything, from your realization to Soobin's sudden shift. But she has done nothing but support you. Feeling indebted to her, you swallowed your pride and reluctantly nodded. "I'll be ready in 15"

When you got there you were instantly greeted by your friends. You silently thanked Lizzy for making you come. She was right. You shouldn't let Soobin stop you from bonding with the rest of your friends.

As you helped Taehyun and Kai with the grill, you initially didn't notice Soobin's arrival.

Yeonjun dabbed him up pulling him into a hug "Glad you came"

Soobin just flashed him a practiced smile, one that didn't feel warm. Yeonjun didn't seem to notice or at least had enough conscience to keep quiet. Soobin couldn't dwell on it for long since his eyes already wandering around as if he were looking for something - or rather someone.

Soobin was brought back to reality when Beomgyu slapped his back with such force, he let out a small 'oof'.

"Nice to see you 'bin - i thought you weren't coming since Yn only came with Lizzy" the latter commented as he took a sip of his soda. And as if on cue you both caught each others' gaze, momentarily forgetting where you were and blocking the noise around you.

You broke the eye contact first, as an attempt to soothe the growing ache in your chest. You didn't want to make him uncomfortable again.

Meanwhile Soobin's gaze lingered, until he was dragged by his friends to help with the drinks.

After the meal preparations, you could all now finally kick back and relax. You played games and sharing stories with laughter ringing in your ears. It felt perfect - well almost perfect. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn't ignore the way Soobin's eyes always drifted towards you more often than you would've liked to admit. His gaze growing more and more intense.

When the others complained at how the drinks were low, you immediately volunteered to grab them from the kitchen desperate to just be alone and gather your thoughts.

What you didn't realize was Soobin trailing behind you.

"Calm down" you whispered to yourself as you grabbed seven bottles from the freezer "Get yourself together Yn" When you turned around you suddenly rammed against something -

you looked up and saw

"Soobin."

you immediately avoided his eyes, holding the ice cold bottles closer than necessary as a poor attempt to ground yourself.

The silence was deafening - the whirring of the refrigerator and the distant sounds of your friends' chatter didn't make it less suffocating

"You need something?" you asked, your voice careful not wanting to make him feel uncomfortable..

Soobin hands clenched into fists, he wasn't used to this - You being overtly cautious around him. It wasn't new to him, he had since this version of yourself a handful of times, but he was never on the receiving end of it.

Meanwhile you felt like you were at the brink of shattering the bottles with how tight you were holding them. Why did Soobin follow you? What did he want?

You waited and gave him a few seconds to explain himself. But Soobin just stood there, stiff as a board his fists clenched firmly. It reminded you of your last encounter. Maybe you were making him uncomfortable again and he was hinting for you to leave?

"Well, i guess i'll just get going now" you were about to make your exit when you felt someone's hand clasping yours.

You turned around and saw Soobin his eyes wide as if he didn't expect to this either. Both of you stood like that for a while until Soobin finally opened his mouth.

"Don't leave yet-" he pleaded, but he slowly loosened his grip on your hand giving you an opening. But when he noticed you weren't leaving he felt a wave of emotions surge through him as a lump formed in his throat.

Ever since that day, he replayed that scene over and over again like a broken record. Pondering and losing himself in endless what-ifs and should'ves.

"I just-" he swallowed, feeling the words get stuck in his throat, his breathing uneven.

Multiple scenarios ran through his head - what if he messed up again? what if you don't feel the same?

"Soobin, look at me" you whispered softly as you taking his hand into yours making him raise his head to look at you.

Seeing your encouraging expression, he felt the weight that had been previously crushing him lift off his shoulders. Now - now's the time his heart screamed.

"About last week - i'm so sorry i was just - so overwhelmed and- my feelings they-"

You held your breath, as you felt your anticipation building up. Was this it? Was he finally going to say it?

But as Soobin finally gained the courage to utter those words -

"What's taking you guys so long?" Kai's voice echoed through the halls, his footsteps getting closer.

Your bubble shattered, the two of you didn't know what to do about the elephant in the room.

Seeing you two standing there awkwardly, with your faces as red as tomatoes Kai froze.

"Umm.. haha on second thought-"

"I'm bringing them out now" you interrupted, your voice a pitch higher than normal, unable to stay there any longer.

Soobin on the other hand just took a deep breath, sighing heavily.

"I interrupted something didn't i?" Seeing how his friend's pitiful expression he shook his head and pat Kai's shoulder "It's fine - let's just get going the others are waiting."

part two

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