#sontaran

We have been informed that you have stockpiles of poison, and reguarly take requests to distribute said poison. We hereby confiscate all your poison to be used in devious traps against the Rutan scum! Therefore, your supplies will serve a greater purpose in the Glorious Sontaran Empire!

For the Greater Glory of the Sontaran Empire!

Listen here, potato head, I don't know which collection of pudding-braineds falsely informed you that I possess poison, but I assure you I have none in my custody.

And even if, by some staggering clerical error in the cosmic administration of reality, a divine hand reached down from the heavens and stuffed my pockets to bursting with enough nightshade, I would not provide a single speck of it to you.

Not out of morality.

And certainly not out of basic concern for your wellbeing.

No, because your application of it would be so catastrophically incompetent every poisoner in recorded history would would rise just to balk in pure outrage at me that something so carefully engineered through centuries of courtly intrigue and professional backstabbing being wasted on you.