just when I was crying earlier my cat, Misty, came over and laid on top of me, first time she's ever done that. and I just got this feeling like "grandma?", as though she took on the spirit of Misty. made me cry even harder, but I was happy for the thought. I needed it.

I pride myself in living life without regrets. But if anyone asks me if I ever had regrets: I’d say no to their face, but in reality, you were my biggest regret. Not making you mine, being an idiot to let you go… -C

I feel strangely ok after reading Gerard's letter. It hurts, I'm still sad, I'm still gonna miss the band...but they know what's best for them more than we do. I can be happy knowing they all still get along and it wasn't due to a problem between them.