#some assembly required

Follow up, does SAR Hiccup lane split in his bike?

I mean, no, because he’s mild mannered as hell. Like he’s a suburban raised nerd, he’s never been in a fight, he’s never done property damage if you don’t count a robot going rogue in high school and like damaging a wall or something. He’s not cool, I cannot stress this enough, he’s just some guy and Astrid has wires crossed in her brain that make her obsessed with him, he’s just a dork.

Like he’s still Hiccup so he does dangerous things and then kind of goes welp, that was close, and moves on with his life, but he’s a dork!! He never lane split before it became legal and now he lowkey forgets it is legal now because he’s a tired dad and doesn’t ride his bike much anymore.

Although Carter wasn’t “Mr. Susie Homemaker” by any means, he hadn’t been able to pass up the opportunity to lend his aid — or rather, to her, when Andrea off-handedly mentioned needing to assemble a new bookcase.

It wasn’t that he was trying to earn her good graces. No, no, of course not, but after their little heart-to-heart in the middle of the night, both had become so swept up in their own personal routines that it almost felt as if…well…he’d imagined their sudden bond, and the thought didn’t sit well with him. And least especially once Princess started (loudly) talking about how she wanted to fix up Andrea with her cousin, some engineer with a boat, or whatever tripe she kept spouting to talk him up.

'If he’s so great, why’s he still single?' Carter sourly thought.

Regardless of his feelings on the matter, Andrea had accepted the help, so he was now sitting with her on the floor of her living room, several pieces spread haphazardly across the carpet while her dog supervised with a vague sense of interest.  

With a soft curse, Carter squinted at the instructions, only to grimace once he realized they were upside down. Because of freaking course they were. Quickly rotating the paper, he grumbled to himself before complaining, “How do people even read these hieroglyphics? I mean, am I really supposed to know what ‘man standing over pole’ is supposed to indicate?”

Perhaps he shouldn’t have said he was good at this…but hell, once Princess mentioned that her oh-so-perfect cousin could probably help, Carter and his big mouth had leapt at the opportunity, and more or less sealed his fate.