#silince

It makes me uncomfortably aware of my surroundings

And all the things I do not know

And it leaves my mind wondering about all the things that could be within it

But at the moment

I feel as if I’m becoming one with it

My body is heavy

And the thought of moving is like the feeling of white noise

Like you can’t explain it but you know something isn’t right

And this feeling of unease is surrounding me

Not suffocating but making the air around me thick

Like trying to swim with arms tired from pushing aside all the little things you think shouldn’t bother you

And I feel that maybe if I close my eyes

and listen to the silence it won’t bother me

Maybe I’ll understand that it’s okay to not know what’s s within it

Or that the point of it is that there is to represent the lack of all that could be

Perhaps it will still bother me

But if at least learn to accept that

Then i might be able to realize

That Things I think shouldn’t bother me

Is not me overreacting

Is not me being on my period

Is not me being a hormonal teenager

It is me being upset about something

It is me realizing that I deserve more then this

It is me comprehending that it’s not my fault

It is me wanting to break the silence

It is also me doubting that it’s worth the hassle

Cause what’s the point of speaking

Silence. in progress

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