#sieben9

Season 1:

1.01 Pilot (aka. Too Crazy Not to Root For)

1.02 The Thing You Love Most (aka. Curses!)

1.03 Snow Falls (aka. Kiss and Wake Up)

1.04 The Price of Gold (aka. Assassination of (Fairy Tale) Character)

1.05 That Still Small Voice (aka. Pulling the Strings)

1.06 The Shepherd (aka. Snow Job)

1.07 The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter (aka. Crying Wolf)

1.08 Desperate Souls (aka. Kiss My Boot!)

1.09. True North (aka. Who's Your Daddy?)

1.10 7.10 AM (aka. When Doves Cry)

1.11 Fruit of the Poisonous Tree (aka. Genie in a Bottle)

1.12 Skin Deep (aka. Deeply Disappointing)

1.13 What Happened To Frederick (aka. Real Love)

1.14 Dreamy (aka. Rotten Dwarf Eggs)

1.15 Red-Handed (aka. Time to Transform)

1.16 Heart of Darkness (aka. Straight to the Heart (of Darkness))

1.17 Hat Tricks (aka. A Tip of the Hat)

1.18 The Stable Boy (aka. Mother Knows Best)

1.19 The Return (aka. Sonny-Side Up)

1.20 The Stranger (aka. A Heartwarming Nightmare)

1.21 An Apple As Red As Blood (aka. Snackrificies)

1.22 A Land Without Magic (aka. There’s A Cloud Hanging Over Us)

Season 2:

2.01 Broken (aka. (Literally) Falling Into Place)

2.02 We Are Both (aka. The Un-Evil Queen)

2.03 Lady of the Lake (aka. A Million Little Pieces)

2.04 The Crocodile (aka. Never-again Land)

2.05. The Doctor (aka. A Patched-Together Abomination)

2.06 Tallahassee (aka. No Honor Among Thieves)

2.07 Child of the Moon (aka. Pack Mentality)

2.08 Into The Deep (aka. Bedtime for Bonzo)

2.09 Queen of Hearts (aka. New Conflict Ahoy, Me Hearties!)

2.10 The Cricket Game (aka. Can People Change? Who Cares?)

2.11 The Outsider (aka. For Whom the Belle Tolls)

2.12 In the Name of the Brother (aka. Multi-dimensional Storytelling, Literally)

2.13 Tiny (aka. Take Us to the Beans!)

2.14 Manhattan (aka. In the Name of the Father)

2.15 The Queen Is Dead (aka. Birthday Girl)

2.16 The Miller’s Daughter (aka. Sympathy for the Devil)

2.17 Welcome To Storybrooke (aka. Open Your Heart to Me (Also Can We All Start 'Shipping Emma and Regina?))

2.18 Selfless, Brave And True (aka. Bait and Switch)

2.19 Lacey (aka. The Lacey Is a Tramp!)

2.20 The Evil Queen (aka. This Show Just Keeps Bagging on Regina/the Evil Queen)

2.21 Second Star To The Right (aka. The Diamond Goes Pear-shaped)

2.22 And Straight on ‘Til Morning (aka. Straight on 'Til Season 3)

Season 3:

3.01 The Heart of the Truest Believer (aka. U Start Believing in Me & I'll Start Believing in U)

3.02 Lost Girl (aka. Breaking the Cycle)

3.03 Quite A Common Fairy (aka. Watching With Hope, Not Anger)

3.04 Nasty Habits (aka. Nasty Messages)

3.05 Good Form (aka. Bromance, Romance, and Hook-ups)

3.06 Ariel (aka. Part of Which World?)

3.07 Dark Hollow (aka. How Darling)

3.08 Think Lovely Thoughts (aka. Dusthead Deadbeat Dads)

3.09 Save Henry (aka. I Regret Nothing)

3.10 The New Neverland (aka. A Familiar Story Device)

3.11 Going Home (aka. Over the Borderline)

3.12 New York City Serenade (aka. Pawed by a Flying Monkey)

3.13 Witch Hunt (aka. A Mother's Touch)

3.14 The Tower (aka. Once Upon a Freudian Slip)

3.15 Quiet Minds (aka. Lumiere Arrives and an Old Flame Gets Snuffed)

3.16 It’s Not Easy Being Green (aka. Once Upon a Repetition Compulsion)

3.17 The Jolly Roger (aka. Your Curse Is On My Lips)

3.18 Bleeding Through (aka. What Ghost Around Comes Around)

3.19 A Curious Thing (aka. Give Your Heart a Break)

3.20 Kansas (aka. Ding, Dong, the Witch Is... Something)

3.21/3.22 Snow Drifts/There’s No Place Like Home (aka. Twice Upon a Cash Grab) 

Season 4 (titled up to episode 3):

4.01 A Tale of Two Sisters (aka. Not Cool, Bro)

4.02 White Out (aka. More Like Wig Out!)

4.03 Rocky Road (aka. A Hot Mess of a Sunday)

4.04

4.05

4.06

4.07

4.08 (those two epiodes are treated as one)

4.09

4.10

4.11

4.12

4.13

4.14

4.15

4.16

4.17

4.18

4.19

4.20

4.21

Season 5:

5.01

5.02

5.03

5.04

5.05

5.06

5.07

5.08 (two episodes as one gain)

5.09

5.10

5.11

5.12

5.13

5.14

5.15

5.16

5.17

5.18

5.19

5.20

5.21

Season 6:

6.01

6.02

6.03

6.04

6.05

6.06

6.07

6.08

6.09

6.10

Finally, the trembling abated, and Belle breathed a sigh of relief, before surveying the damage around her. Considering how intense the shaking had been, it wasn't too bad. Quite a lot of books had tumbled down from their shelves, and Belle flinched at the thought of the damage the fall might have caused them, before setting out to clear up the mess. She piled the more seriously afflicted tomes in a corner. Maybe she could convince Rumplestiltskin to repair them as an apology. If he stayed true to form, it wouldn't take him long to appear somewhere in the room under the guise of complaining about the chaos, while really apologising for causing it in the first place and, most likely, checking up on her safety.

A silly ruse, really, but he was often like that: Concerned with maintaining a fearsome reputation that she knew was mostly for show. The fact that she was able spent her evenings reading in this library — the library he had all but admitted building for her — was maybe the clearest sign of that. These days, her duties in the castle seemed minimal, at most, and brought her suspiciously often into the company of its owner. Belle suspected that the building was either capable of cleaning itself, or that Rumplestiltskin simply maintained most rooms with magic.

It took Belle a while to realise that Rumplestiltskin wasn't going to make an appearance. Outside, the sun was already setting, and she was nearly done tidying up the library. It seemed odd enough that a twinge of worry tugged at her gut, silly as it seemed. After all, what could possibly have harmed the Dark One? He probably just wanted to avoid apologising — he certainly made it look like the act caused him physical pain each time.

Well, Belle decided, if Rumplestiltskin wasn't going to come looking for her, she was just going to have to go looking for him. It certainly didn't have anything to do with that persistent feeling of worry; she simply wanted him to fix these books for her. Yes, that was definitely it.

Her first thought was to just check his usual haunts within the castle, but she quickly gave up on the idea. She only saw him in the more open rooms during the day, and that was certainly not the place where he conducted his magical experiments. No, if she wanted to find Rumplestiltskin, she would have to find the source of the explosion. This train of thought led her along new cracks and flaws in the castle's structure all the way to the opposite end of the building, and up into another tower where she found an open door.

"Rumplestiltskin?" she asked. Even if they had a more familiar relationship these days, it seemed imprudent to surprise a busy sorcerer.

No reply came, so she knocked on the door, repeating more loudly, "Rumplestiltskin? Are you in there?"

Silent seconds passed, and Belle was about to resign herself to the idea that she might have been wrong about his whereabouts, when she heard a very quiet "Come in."

With a satisfied smile — she had found him after all — Belle pushed open the door and stepped into the room. It was larger than she had expected, and the air smelled like a meadow after a thunderstorm, coppery and strange, but also fresh and washed clean. Various shelves and clutter of no doubt magical items took up most of the space, but in the middle stood a single table that was suspiciously clear of any disarray. Next to it, a figure sat slumped on a stool, and it took Belle a moment to recognise it as Rumplestiltskin.

"I've never seen this place before," Belle whispered, mostly to herself.

"That would explain why I leave tracks in the dust whenever I come in here."

Belle looked down pointedly at the spotless floor — well, spotless save for the recent signs of disarray, at least — but didn't rise to the bait otherwise. "I was cleaning and heard a noise. Are you alright?" Calling the almighty thunder from earlier 'a noise' felt like even more of a lie than claiming that she was cleaning while actually reading in the library, but she doubted that he would call her on it.

Indeed, Rumplestiltskin just waved her off. "Yes, yes, I'm fine. Everything is fine. Now go away."

Belle raised an eyebrow. This did not seem like him. If nothing else, he should have taken the opportunity to tease her about the allegedly terrible condition of the castle. Squinting, she took a closer look at him, and saw that he looked visibly dishevelled, if unharmed. "Are you sure your alright?" she asked again. "Half the castle seems to have fallen in on itself and—"

" I said I'm fine!" he snapped, now all but snarling at her. He never got up from his stool, but Belle still flinched back. At that, his face softened, but only for a moment. "I am in the middle of a very important breakthrough. Now leave, before you can cause any more damage."

"I'm sorry," Belle managed to say. "I was just worried—"

"I said leave!" His arm moved lightning quick and Belle ducked away instinctively. Behind her something shattered, and when she looked around, she saw the remains of an empty beaker. Without another word, she backed out of the door and fled back to her room.

##

The next morning, Belle woke up determined to find Rumplestiltskin and confront him about his behaviour on the night before. Yes, he had a temper, but he had never really lost it at her like that since she had set free that poor man who had tried to steal from him. Something was wrong, and he was going to tell her what.

However, when Belle went looking for him once again infuriating man seemed nowhere to be found. More than that, as the day went on it became clear to Belle that he was actively avoiding her. While his schedule had never been entirely predictable, Belle had gained the impression that he would usually turn up in the dinner hall at the appropriate times, and on most days, she would happen across him several times a day while going about her — now relatively few — duties. They would talk, or at least trade banter, and both would usually leave the conversation in a better mood than when they had begun it. Now, however, she saw neither hair, nor sparkly hide of him for the entire day, save for a short run-in in the evening, when she went back to her room and found him leaning against the wall, looking decidedly exhausted.

“Are you—” she began, her earlier irritation already forgotten.

“You should be asleep,” he replied, ignoring her question. “Good night.”

Belle tried to engage him again, but he fell silent and refused to even look at her, until she stalked off, once again intensely irritated. Only later did she realise that she'd never seen him actually walking the corridors before. Part of her had always assumed that he magically appeared and disappeared as he pleased, never bothering with mundane concerns like corridors or stairs.

This pattern of evasion continued for two more days. In the end, Belle simply lost patience and went looking for the castle’s elusive owner. Her search didn’t take long. She found him in a previously empty room on the ground floor, buried in a thick tome with something about "Protective Spells" in the title. Belle only caught a glimpse of the cover, before he slammed it shut to glare at her. "What is it now?" Rumplestiltskin asked in a none-too-gentle tone.

"You have been avoiding me for three days," Belle said, trying to keep calm. "Ever since the accident in the lab. I just wanted to make sure—"

"I'm fine," Rumplestiltskin snarled and his emphasis alone convinced Belle that he wasn't.

"You've been avoiding me." Belle couldn't help but let the words sound like an accusation.

"Maybe because I was getting tired of your inane questions." Rumplestiltskin never moved, but his words had gained a dangerous edge.

"Don't be ridiculous! We've spoken exactly once in the last days, and you were ready to bolt to avoid that conversation, too. Not to mention that you threw something at me to avoid explaining what happened. This isn't like you."

"Oh, and you would be the expert on what is 'like me', I suppose?" A nasty grin, devoid of any humour, flashed across his face. "No doubt through the long hours of deep conversations we've had, where I bared my heart and soul to you, and which, of course, make you amply qualified to judge my state of mind."

Belle pressed her lips together. "This is exactly what I mean," she said, although this was much more like him. He could be cruel, sometimes, but rarely without reason, and almost never to her. Not in the recent weeks, at least. "And I'm going to keep asking you questions until you tell me what is wrong. You can't avoid me forever."

His eyes flashed. "Maybe not. But I can certainly lock you in your old cell if you won't leave me alone, when I order you to."

Silence fell, and Belle felt the blood drain from her face. "I think," she said, choosing each word carefully, "that we should end this conversation right now."

Even Rumplestiltskin seemed to realise that he had gone too far. His eyes widened, and he moved to get up. "No, wait," he began. "Belle, I'm sorry, I didn't mean—"

"I don't think I will." The words seemed to come from far away, even though it was her mouth saying them. "When you're ready to talk, come and find me. You usually know where. Until then, I don't think I have anything to say to you, Rumplestiltskin." With that, she stalked off, fighting against the tears that were stinging her eyes.

##

Belle woke in almost complete darkness, wedged into a tight space, with aching muscles and dry eyes. For a moment, her thoughts raced, trying to remember where she was. After her fight with Rumplestiltskin, she hadn't been able to face going back to her room, still too shaken by Rumplestiltskin's threat. She liked to think that he would never follow through on it, but the thought of waking up in that dungeon again had felt like an iron vice squeezing her chest until it was fit to crumple in on itself. Instead, she had gone to the only place that still felt like safety.

The library. Right. She was in the library, wedged between two shelves that hid her from view of anyone who might be glancing casually into the room.

She remembered crying a little, before forcing herself to calm down and pulling a book down from the shelves. She must have fallen asleep while reading, because the moon now stood high in the sky and cast its pale light through the library's windows. Belle sighed. Comforting as the books were, the library did not make for good sleeping quarters. She would have to go to her room, or be completely exhausted in the morning.

Just as she was getting up, she heard a faint thump on the stairs and froze. There was really only one option for who could be making noise at this hour in the castle, and Belle had no desire to confront Rumplestiltskin when she was tired and aching all over from her ill-advised nap.

So she held perfectly still while his steps approached. Were they just a little slower than usual? And what was that faint thump that followed them? Tap-tap-thunk. Tap-tap-thunk.

The sounds changed when he reached the top of the stairs, and she could hear him breathe. Her ears painted a picture of golden skin glittering in the silvery light, while he walked through the room, no doubt looking for her. She heard wood scraping on wood — the ladder, he's using the ladder — and a faint rustling noise.

Silence followed, and Belle listened, barely breathing, for his next move.

It came as a resounding, and almost comically protracted crash. One moment, the library was as quiet as a grave, and in the next, filled with the sound of falling books, falling shelves, and one falling Dark One, who let out a thoroughly undignified curse. Belle flinched and ducked, out of sheer habit, until the crashing had abided. She then cautiously peeked around the shelf, to see Rumplestiltskin lying sprawled amidst scattered books, groaning faintly in what she had to assume was pain.

"Rumplestiltskin?" she asked.

He flinched at the sound of his name, quickly pushing himself up from the ground and into a sitting position, but not getting up entirely. He looked around, clearly searching for something and Belle stepped closer and into a beam of moonlight that fell through a window and illuminated the room.

He flinched and scrambled backwards, away from her, eyes impossibly wide and dark in the faint light. "Who—" He broke off. "Belle?"

She didn't ask who else he had been expecting. For some reason, seeing her seemed to terrify him, and even the thought that he might be scared of her was abhorrent. "I'm sorry," she said, keeping her voice low and soothing. "I didn't know you were here until I heard the crash." That wasn't entirely true, but it was close enough. She certainly hadn't meant to spy on him. "What happened?"

His face closed off again. "I fell."

Belle waited, holding her breath, afraid that anything she might say would only make him close up more. Something was terribly wrong with Rumplestiltskin, that much was clear, but if he didn't tell her what it was, there was no chance of her helping him with it. Only a very small part of Belle was surprised that her first instinct was indeed to help a man who technically still held her captive.

The silence stretched between them, their eyes locked, neither of them willing to make the next move. Then, as if something inside him had snapped under the tension, Rumplestiltskin deflated. "I fell, because I was trying to take out a new book, while still holding this one on the other hand, and put weight on my bad leg."

"I didn't know you had a bad leg," Belle said carefully.

Rumplestiltskin made a sound that could almost be called a laugh. "Of course you didn't," he said bitterly, dropping his gaze from hers. "Normally, I make up for the injury with magic."

This time, Belle didn't say anything. She had the feeling that he was working his way towards what he really wanted to say, and she didn't want to throw him off his path with a wrong word.

After a while, Rumplestiltskin spoke again.  "It was the potion," he explained. "I was trying to — never mind what I was trying to do. Something went wrong, and…" His gaze was fixed on his hands in his lap. "I lost it."

Belle frowned. "Lost what?" She suspected that she already knew the answer, but even forming the thought in her head seemed ludicrous. She had to hear him say it..