#sideplot:eon

Aku: I’m sure our little adventure will come in handy for the future, wouldn’t it–???

Aku: …What are you–

{ Eon used Pounce! Jokul’s illusion broke! }Aku: Oh.

Eon: ...I know I probably shouldn’t ask since I’ll likely not get a real answer but ... why did you help me, honestly?

Aku: Out of the deepest and most sincere depths of my heart and soul, I couldn’t bear to stand by and let you die the loneliest and most pathetic of deaths imaginable in this realm.

Eon: .....That was sarcasm.

Aku: Oh good, you’re learning.

{ Eon and Aku have arrived at the cave. }

Aku & Eon: …

Eon: …Actually, you can eat this one. Go ahead.

Aku: Finally.

ZoRudeAnon: Ah?!

Aku: Honestly, why would you want to be anything else???

Aku: As an Eevee, you can either stay the same and be boring, or turn into either a walking catfish, a spark buttplug, an overtoasted marshmellow, a hairless freak, a useless plant, a glass snowflake, or another freak with a ribbon fetish. At least with Umbreon, you have venom, stealth and defense on your side. Clearly it’s the most logical choice for survival.

Eon: Either way, it’s not up to you, it’s up to him when he’s old enough. Hopefully by then, he’ll have even more options to evolve into if he wants.

Aku: Such as?

Aku: Yeah, that’s useful.

Aku: Now we can add “confused rock hoarder” to the list of evolutions Eevee can take–

{ Eon used Frustration! }

{ Aku’s substitute lost 1HP! }

Eon: How can you sa-- wah!

Eon: What is this? Put me down! Hey!!

{ Aku and Eon have left the cave... }