#shepsky

It's just me...

I said it upon entering the front door. Always following a little tap on the door. As I turned my key I'd hear you sprinting down the stairs and somehow not slam into the front door. I'd wait. Open the door. "It's just me," I'd say. You began to sit at the door patiently.

How things turned out wasn't fair. You didn't deserve to have your mind plagued by so many demons that you began to take out your fear and frustration on me. I loved you so much. Even after you bit me the first time, all I wanted was to put in the work and help you to be happy. Even after the second attack where you drew blood, ended up giving me a bloody nose trying to literally eat my face, and left me with scars from where your beautiful smile tore into my arms. Even then, I didn't want to do this.

I cried so much on your last day, I screamed in the room holding your head in my lap while the vet just let me cry. I was in there cuddled next to your limp body for an hour because I couldn't let you go. I didn't go home until 7am the next morning because I couldn't bare the thought of walking inside without you there to greet me.

I ended up dropping out of school because the grief had me in hell with the anger and depression and being suicidal. I was in therapy for 3 hours that day and I hadn't stopped crying.

Your old family... I'm sure they loved you but not enough to take care of you. Not enough to keep you safe from other animals. Not enough to get you vaccinated. Not enough to even give you a tag with a name and address. What life did they give you if you had these demons inside you? How did they treat you? Abuse? Neglect? If I could go back in time I'd save you all over again. You deserved so much more than you got in life. I'm so angry at the world for not letting me love you for your full lifespan.

Theta Marshmallow, you will always be my baby.

You shall forever live on in my heart, and on my skin.

New Fursona! Astro! 💫⭐️(he/they) (Thats also one of my old names, actually one of my first chosen names, the very first one is essentially the same as my current name)

i was pretty tired busy and art blocked when i drew these but i had been working on designing some guys rotating in my mind lately, a white shepsky named maverick and a pit mix named denzel. definitely gonna alter some things but its nice to have a base design out, it doesn't matter how good the art is when you're just working on first pass concepts

the first idea for denzel was him being the driver and camera operator for maverick. he's definitely got more of a ways to go still with working on character than the other guy though. i got tired so all i wanted to do for him was that lol

its taken me a while to figure out what i wanted maverick to do bcuz originally my thought process leaned to some sort of indiana jones-esque bounty hunter kind of guy, but i wasn't really interested in that for a variety of reasons, so i tossed around a bunch of other ideas for what he could do where he could Kind Of be like that but also not at all. a steve irwin type was what i ended up settling on and my (southern) boyfriend suggested he be from florida, which i liked and kept (he recommends everyone be southern- i think he's onto something)