I think Shen is processing some internalized transphobia and getting over the “I don’t want to transition into an ugly girl and be treated even WORSE” mindset I’ve seen a lot of eggs struggle with.
Particularly I get this vibe from the “final form” comic where the implication is that wearing feminine clothes makes Shen look like Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force (a balding middle aged man with a mustache). There’s a lot of self awareness and self scrutiny going on there.
Shen, I’m gonna hold your hand when I say this:
It’s not about being liked by others.
It’s about liking yourself.
It’s about smiling when you see your own reflection for the first time in years and actually recognizing the person looking back at you.
Inhibition out of fear will only serve to harm you further in the long run, but self acceptance will set you free.
Also, don’t underestimate what estrogen is capable of. Dysphoria blinders are REAL.