#shematthew

"Garcia?" he answered.

Morgan sighed and shook his head. He should've known better than to not return her calls: she counted on the well-acknowledged fact that Spencer's heart was too pure to avoid her, contrary to what Derek had done.

"Your boyfriend is blatantly ignoring me." she pouted.

Spencer scoffed. "Not surprised."

"But is he okay?? Kate didn't sound OK when I called her. At least, 'shell-shocked trembly voice' doesn't equal 'OK' in my book."

"Well then I guess he is ok in your book?" he quickly glanced over to Derek, who was staring down at his hands in his lap but clearly attempting to eavesdrop the conversation.

"Then can you convince him to talk to me? DEREK MORGAN I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME!" she yelled, causing Spencer to snatch the phone away from his ear to avoid going deaf at her squeaky voice, with a grimace that showed a hint of amusement.

"Tell her that I'm fine." Derek said, unable to keep a slight grin from playing at the corners of his lips. He guessed it was Penelope's goal all along. It always was.

"I did!" Spencer said. "Garcia, he's fine." he got back to speaking to her.

"I can confirm, he's still your healthy piece of chocolate- or whatever you call him." Rossi added jokingly from the front.

"You heard that?"

"Ok! Fine! I heard you! Will you take care of him, though?"

Spencer giggled shyly at that. "Yeah. I will take care of him." he replied lowering his voice significantly - he wanted Derek alone to hear. He received a glance and a snort from him at that.

They stared into each other's eyes for a while, before Penelope spoke up again.

"And...will you do me another favor, Boy Wonder?"

"Anything."

"Will you hold his hand for me?"

Spencer chuckled again. "Give me a second." he unbuckled his seatbelt and scooted to the seat right beside Derek, buckling up again with one hand.

Derek's pupils followed his movements with a confused smirk on his face. "Wha-"

"Shut up, just following orders." Spencer cut him off, sliding his hand on Derek's lap to lace their fingers tightly together.

"Done." he assured Garcia.

"You're a guarantee, Spencer Reid."

"I sure am." his gaze on Derek didn't waver.

"Mwah. I'll see you tomorrow, my heroes."

"Bye Penelope." he hung up.

Spencer brought his boyfriend's hand to his mouth, to place gentle kisses on his bruised knuckles.

"That an order, too?" Derek asked, looking at him with heart eyes.

"Nope. This is a bonus." Spencer replied, smiling.

"I see..." Morgan nodded with a grin just as wide printed on his face, shifting his look ahead of them.

For a second, he caught Rossi's smiling eyes from the rear view mirror.

-

- half an hour later

-

Morgan opened the door to their room and was invested all over again by a sickening feeling. The window was small, every piece of furniture was a dull shade of grey/beige-ish color, and it smelled like...sadness. Hotch would sure as hell regret deciding to stay the night after seeing those rooms.

Reid dropped both their go-bags on one of the single beds and stared at Morgan as he kicked his shoes off and sat on the mattress, elbows digging holes in his knees. He sighed and got closer, standing on his feet.

He reached a hand down to caress Derek's nape affectionately, satisfied with how his shoulders immediately relaxed at the touch. Derek tilted his chin up to meet his gaze, and Spencer could swear his heart swelled when seeing on his face what he guessed was the famous "puppy-eye look" he always accused him of pulling off.

He slightly smiled down at him. "You wanna shower first?"

"Yeah." he nodded.

Derek finally stood up and looked at him with something akin to a guilty expression. "...thanks"

"For what?" Spencer leaned in to gently kiss his temple. "do you need help?"

"To shower?" Derek snorted, while browsing in his bag for his sweats and a t-shirt.

"...doesn't hurt to ask, right?" Spencer nipped shyly at his bottom lip.

"Baby, I'm fine. I'll let you know if I need anything."

Spencer nodded, trying to contain his smile at the pet name as Derek turned on his heels and disappeared in the bathroom.

-

Morgan found himself regretting refusing the offer when even bending down to pull his pants off turned out to be a painful motion.

He sucked it up and proceeded to remove the bandages the medics had wrapped around his torso, and the band-aid Spencer had insisted that they put on the cut on his brow bone. The bruises on his belly were still burning red and purple, and the scratch layered over them was fresh like it was made a minute before - he hissed in pain when the bandage sticked slightly to it while trying to peel it off.

Much to his relief, the warm water of the shower seemed to soothe down the soreness - at least temporarily. The other, nasty side of the coin, though, was that it made the cuts itch even more.

He tried to clean himself and his wounds as best as he could, considering the limited range of motions the pain allowed him to engage in and how little longer his legs could keep him standing from the exhaustion.

Unfortunately enough, when he got out of the shower he felt 20 lbs heavier, and the swelling of his left shoulder had worsened - if it was even possible. He bet Spencer had trusted him to know he should've showered cold. Maybe he shouldn't have been so trustful, despite how Derek would've sure as hell rolled his eyes if he'd tried to remind him.

He managed to put his sweats on through clenched teeth, and sat on the crappy stool in the corner of that crappy bathroom of their crappy hotel room, to re-do the medication, hoping it would come out at least half as effective as how the medics on the ambulance had done it.

And just like that, as expected, when he tried to reach his hand down for the antiseptic he had - stupidly - placed on the tiled floor; a stabbing twinge of pain pierced through his left shoulder and spread like an electric shock down his spine.

It was probably time to swallow his pride.

-

Spencer took advantage of the time Derek was spending in the bathroom to finally put his pajamas on - he was too tired to think of showering. He'd do that in the morning before leaving.

He was sitting on the bed, reading a book, or at least trying to: every single noise that came from the bathroom's direction made him wince in alertness.

"Fuck-"

-

When he heard the bit-back cursing, he jumped on his feet and headed to the other room in a matter of seconds.

"Derek? E- Everything ok?" he asked through the closed door. He didn't wanna seem too worried or too pushy, he new Derek couldn't stand it - but he was worried.

"Yeah..." Morgan made a pause not long enough for Reid to answer. "actually... Can- can you come in here for a sec?"

Spencer opened the door and was immediately absorbed in a cloud of hot steam, condensing on the mirror and the sliding glass door of the shower.

He turned to his right to find Derek shut-eyed sitting in the corner of the small bathroom, his head leaning back on the wall and a hand pressed on his shoulder.

"You showered with hot water??" Spencer was well aware of sounding like a teacher scolding his student. He couldn't have cared less.

"Jeez Spencer, I forgot, alright? Didn't even cross my mind to shower ice-cold."

The younger man sighed and shook his head. He looked around for the t-shirt Derek was wearing before showering.

"Let's see if this works..." he mumbled to himself while filling up the sink with cold water - the coldest it could get. He dipped the cotton piece of clothing in it, making sure it was thoroughly soaked; shivering as goosebumps grew on his forearms.

He wrung out the shirt of the excess water and folded it, before kneeling in between Derek's legs to place it on his puffy shoulder.

"Shit. 'ts cold." Derek sucked his teeth while visibly shuddering.

"That's kind of the point." Spencer mockingly smirked at him. "Sit straight now." he commanded.

He picked up the bottle of antiseptic from the floor and poured some of it on a gauze.

"It's gonna sting a little..." he warned him, an apologetic look on his sweet face. Derek just nodded.

Spencer hesitated a bit. He hadn't yet managed to take a real look at his boyfriend's injuries. He gulped uncomfortably, images of what those convicts had done to him flashing before his eyes - Derek hadn't told him what they'd done; he could only imagine.

Derek watched him slowly trace the bruises on his abdomen with his hands. His breath hitched for a second in his throat and his abs instinctively contracted as the pads of Spencer's fingers magically left goosebumps behind, as if his skin was a plain canvas and he was drawing onto it.

"Hey," he murmured softly, tilting Spencer's chin up with his index. Puppy eyes. "I'm fine. You told Garcia yourself."

"I know." Spencer nodded unconvinced, ultimately proceeding to gently press the gauze on his scratch to clean it.

Derek's abdomen tensed up once again. "Stings like a bitch, not 'a little'." he muttered screwing his eyes close.

Spencer slightly chuckled. "Come on, big guy." he mocked.

"Got jokes now?" Derek smiled through the pain. His grin did nothing but widen uncontrollably when, a second after, Spencer's eyes leveled up with his, to repeat the disinfecting-process on the cut on his brow bone as well.

He stared at his concentrated expression, the one where his pink lips parted a little to let the tip of his tongue stick out at the corner of his mouth. His pretty face so close it made Derek wish he could eat it.

When said expression changed into a deep frown, and Spencer's hand detached from his face, he guessed something in his own expression must have involuntarily hinted at him to do so.

-

"Does it hurt so bad? Am I- am I hurting you?" Spencer worriedly broke the silence, catching in Derek's eyes a concerning glimmering that had replaced the warm, knee-melting smile he was wearing before.

"No- nonono it's not- it's not you, kid." he shook his head vigorously in response.

"Then what?" Spencer asked, tossing the gauze in the small trash can before cupping the other's face in his hands.

Derek looked down at the small portion of ceramic-tiled floor that was separating them. "I don't know. I guess I just can't stop thinking about it."

"...about what specifically?"

Spencer was a bit afraid of asking him to be specific. Again, he didn't know what they had done to him and Kate - luckily, she only seemed to have a split lip. Guess being a big, black, male federal agent hadn't helped him at all. It never did. Spencer's heart ached at that every time.

Morgan sighed. "The only reason why we're here, is because Julio saved our asses." he met his gaze again only after saying it.

What could Reid reply to that? It was nothing but the truth. The team would've never made it in time if the convicts had continued beating them up - and God knows what would've happened then. He couldn't let his mind go to that place.

"What...what did they do to you?" he found the nerve to ask instead.

Derek shook his head a little, as if silently asking: 'what will it change once you'll know it?'

"Derek," Spencer gently stroked his boyfriend's chin with his thumb. "What did they do ?"

Morgan hesitated for another second or two.

"Alright. First," he raised both his hands in front of the other's face, to remind him of the bruises on his knuckles. "fist fight, of course. I couldn't see but- I think they literally threw Kate over the table and she fell on the other side..." he frowned deeply, realizing only then how shaky his voice had become. "They also stabbed the guard we were interviewing in his hip. You remember that one?"

Spencer nodded briefly.

Derek was getting a bit self-aware of how vulnerable he must've looked from his boyfriend's perspective. He continued regardless.

"Then they, uh...threatened us both with knives at our jaws." he dropped his eyes once again, letting a tear fall down and hit the floor.

Reid said nothing. He had to swallow the lump in his throat several times, but he said nothing.

Only then he noticed the wet traces some drops of water had drawn on Derek's pecs and biceps coming from the folded, damp t-shirt resting on his shoulder. He finally removed the piece of clothing and distractedly tossed it in the sink behind him; a crumb of relief was enough to lessen the creasing of his eyebrows when he saw his shoulder's puffiness had gone down pretty visibly.

"And this?" he asked, taking a towel to wipe dry Derek's skin.

Derek turned his head to look at his shoulder - like he'd forgotten about it for a second - feeling like a 5 lbs weight had been lifted from it.

"That's...when they tied us up and pushed me to the ground. I fell on this shoulder on the concrete." he sniffled. "and then just...kicks. Everywhere." Morgan waved a hand, gesturing around the area of his flushed abdomen.

'Tied us up'. Spencer suddenly remembered finding him like that, and being the one to cut the plastic cable ties on his wrists and ankles. He dropped the towel and took Derek's hands. The red marks of the ties had significantly faded away but were still there; his complexion not dark enough to conceal them. He could only imagine how evident they must've still looked on Kate's fair skin.

"And still..." Derek continued after a while, wiping the few tears he'd shed with the heel of his hand. "I- I just can't bring myself to blame them for feeling enraged like that. You know?" he asked, as if wanting Spencer to validate his thought.

He tilted his chin up again, and Spencer's shoulders helplessly dropped with the weight of sheer sadness when he saw the look on his boyfriend's face, and the flush around his eyes.

"Yeah. I get that." he paused. "But- but Derek, it wasn't our fault that those guards abused of their power- and killed that kid. We could only intervene once they called us. You know this."

The words didn't seem to solace Derek at all. But Spencer didn't know what to say - for once. He tried not to indulge in self-denigrating thoughts - because Derek always begged him not to - but sometimes he realized he really was of no help in comforting him, or at least not nearly as much as Morgan was for him; always having the right words and, if not that, surely a pair of strong arms to protect him. Reid didn't even have that.

He tried anyway - maybe he couldn't fiercely shelter him, but he could gently soothe him.

-

After a long silence, Derek felt soft hands once again cupping his face.

Out of the blue, Spencer started sprinkling kisses all over him - near the cut on his brow, on his bruised cheekbone. And then slowly flowed downwards, paying extra attention to press his lips gently on his swollen shoulder. And his hands left his jaw just to grab onto his waist, and scatter velvet kisses on the whole bruised area of his abs. And Morgan let him do it, closing his eyes because for once he wanted to try and give in to the fantasy that Reid could really kiss his pain away; and at each new peck, each new time his lips warmed up the skin lying underneath them while the tip of his tiny nose and the ends of his hair tickled him like the wings of a butterfly - each time he was convinced more and more that Spencer really had the power to take away his pain, and kiss Derek's way out of his relentless thoughts that only added to the physical ache of it all.

And he didn't deserve it, he thought as a new wave of tears heaped up beneath his eyelids. He didn't deserve any of it - any of Spencer.

"Spencer..." he whispered his name, and the other's face rose up again to level with his.

He snaked a hand behind Spencer's neck, entangling in his silky hair, and slipped an arm around his torso, and he kissed him. He took his lips in his as if trying to do the same for him, to return the favor. And when his tongue languidly made its way inside Spencer's mouth, brushing past his plump bottom lip and curling up with his as if it could get any deeper than it already was; and a breathy moan escaped those lips that he was trying to cradle into the same comfort they'd cradled his body before - he took that moan as a sign that maybe it was working, that maybe he was managing to strip out a small amount of the ache at least a quarter as successfully as he'd done with him; a different kind of ache but in no way less wrecking.

Spencer's lips broke out of that kiss that left them breathless but asking for more at the same time.

"I- I don't wanna hurt you and I- I still have to bandage you up." the words were nothing but a shuddering whisper against Derek's mouth, at that point.

"You're not hurting me. You're healing me, Spencer."

-

Spencer's heartbeat increased to a point where it was deafening his ears. He parted their foreheads and stared deep into Derek's black eyes, like he could find the answer to why he would say such a thing if he stared long enough.

"Everything you do. You heal me." the man added.

He dropped his gaze down to the floor to hide from Derek's sight the tears that were on the verge of spilling out of his eyes, drawing his eyebrows together intensely in the attempt of pursuing that task.

"...it's the bare minimum I can do." he murmured, his voice was shaking way too much now for him to keep pretending Derek couldn't hear it.

He swallowed and shook his head to pull himself together.

"Now, at least let me do that properly." he smiled with glossy eyes, achieving the goal of receiving Derek's smile back. Only his smile made him feel 100 miles above earth level.

He un-wrapped his limbs from around the other's neck and reached down to take the roll of gauze. He untucked the end of it to press it on Derek's front, asking him to keep it in place while he encircled his torso with his arms to make several laps around it, trying to cover the whole scratch as well as the most part of his bruising - he hoped the bandage could work as another layer to lessen the soreness whenever Derek accidentally bumped into something or pressed against it.

While doing that operation - slowly, still afraid to hurt him - he was inevitably close to the point of feeling Derek's breath on his skin, especially when he had to lean forward to pass the gauze roll from one hand to the other behind his back.

Derek's face inched closer and nuzzled his nose and lips lightly against the soft spot on Spencer's neck below his ear, making him impossibly ticklish.

"You're de-concentrating me." he reprimanded him jokingly.

" 'm sorry. Can't really help it. Though you should work on your attention span." Derek felt the other's smile against his skin.

"Luckily enough, I'm finished." Spencer finally stood up, grunting at how numb his legs were. He couldn't help but notice yet once again how, for one reason or another, his knees always hurt after he'd spent time with Derek. Even if he tried as hard as he could, though, he couldn't recall one single time where it was due to an unpleasant reason...

"Hope it lasts..." he added, forcing his mind to shift away from that topic.

Morgan mirrored his motion and then reached a hand out toward the hook on the door with the intention to grab his clean t-shirt; which he would've managed to do if it hadn't been for Reid beating him to the punch.

He threw him a glare with his head slightly tilted, followed by an overly dramatic eye-roll. He gave up at last, putting his hands up to help Spencer slip the t-shirt over his head, trying not to burst out chuckling at the adorable smirk playing on his face.

-

They walked out of the bathroom and into the other room. Derek sat on the bed and slowly laid down on his back.

He let out a heavy sigh, shutting his eyes with his palm. "Why do I have this feeling that NO sleeping position possible won't hurt?"

Spencer stood still beside the mattress. "Well- I can- uh, I can sleep in the other bed it's no big deal, I don't want you to lose any more sleep..." he suggested half-heartedly as he started to take a step back from the bed, biting the inside of his cheek and scratching the back of his neck.

"What? Nuh-uh, no way pretty boy, I need you here and now." Derek replied, gaining a wide, timid smile from his boyfriend. He carefully propped himself on one elbow and grabbed Spencer's wrist to pull him closer toward him.

Spencer crawled beside him and laid onto his side, spooning him. He figured it was the less painful position: it didn't put pressure on his left shoulder, because he was lying onto his right side; nor on his abdomen; and last but not least, Derek was never the type to sleep on his back. That was gonna be his excuse if asked - he sure as hell wasn't gonna ruin his "know-it-literally-all" reputation by revealing that he simply loved being the big spoon.

He pulled the comforter over them, before wrapping both his skinny arms around Derek's broad body; one enveloping his middle, the other his shoulders, sneaking from beneath the crook of the man's neck. A warm sensation spread over his chest, only increasing when he heard a faint sigh of contentment slipping out of the other's nose.

Derek switched off the lamp on the nightstand, finding himself a little surprised when the beginnings of drifting off to sleep came so easy, embraced by the man he loved more than anything on this planet.

-

He felt Spencer's soft, slow, damp kisses tracing from the crown of his head to the nub of his spine; and then the tip of his nose brushing up and down that same trail.

"I don't know what good I did to deserve you, kid." he whispered after a while. He could easily bet that got Spencer all blushy and cute - not that he could see him, but he'd come to learn by heart how to make him flush a long, long time ago.

"If you don't stop saying these kind of things I'm gonna kiss you senseless." Spencer replied, playing tough - which came off cuter than he'd probably wished.

Derek chuckled. "That a threat?"

"Yeah- I'm- I'm sorry Garcia it's really late I have to go, thank you for your precious advice, you're the best." he finally answered in a rush.

"Wh- but I didn't even GET to-" he hung up before she could finish the sentence.

-

That phrase from earlier triggered a sudden realization in Spencer's mind: Derek could probably not care less about what he was gonna wear. The important thing to him, was that he'd show up. And it was late, so he had to get it out of his head - it wasn't like some kind of breaking news that Derek loved him, anyway. Spencer knew it, deep down. Even if it was still hard for him to wrap his mind around the fact that SSA Derek Morgan, the hot chocolate, the hunk, the ladies' man - pfft, yeah, right? - was in love with him.

That very thought escaped his brain only to make space for another one, just as paranoid, inconclusive and time-consuming: Penelope was right, wasn't she.

Derek always made time to visit his family everytime they had a case in Chicago, before going back to Quantico; it was a known fact amongst the team. Plus, the others didn't mind spending an extra half-day in the city to go out or - more realistically - crash in their hotel rooms.

So if you take that, and add the fact that Sarah had hinted to Derek to invite Spencer for dinner sometime; you get that Penelope was right. EVEN if Derek could've asked with a little more advance - instead of that same morning - and EVEN if, at the time Derek had told him about that conversation with his sister, Spencer hadn't really said a clear "yes". He hadn't said "no" either, to be fair.

Also, one would guess Spencer should've just been prepared for it, sooner or later, right? After all, Derek and him had been dating for... well, he wasn't quite sure. Not because he didn't remember: of course he remembered their first kiss, their first "date" - or whatever you call it when two people see each other outside of work - the first time they had kinda-but-not-really expressed their feelings for each other, the first time they had slept together. So, which one of those should he take in consideration to determine how long they'd been dating? Or maybe it was a matter of guessing an average out of all those parameters? Spencer had always had troubles trying to pinpoint that.

Anyway. None of those thoughts were helping him to decide which one of the 3 shirts displayed on the mattress he was going to wear that night. If not a whole "nice" outfit, he could've at least packed Derek's favorite shirt, just to be sure. He didn't even know why that was his favorite: it was just a pale lilac button-up. He said that the fact that it hung a bit too loose on his shoulders and arms, and had to roll up the sleeves once or twice, gave him permission to fantasize that it was his shirt, worn by Spencer - which, by the way: he could simply say he'd like Spencer to wear his shirts. He definitely wouldn't mind doing that. And ultimately, aside from this whole reverie of Derek's: it was still a damn pale lilac button-up a couple sizes too big.

-

Spencer checked his watch for the fifth time in the last 20 minutes: 7:15 pm. Derek was gonna knock on his hotel room door in 15.

He chose to keep it elegant but subtle, finally picking a blue-ish grey shirt, to pair with black jacket and slacks, trying to go with his gut - whatever that meant. Derek always told him to "feel" stuff. He probably didn't mean him to apply it to such a shallow thing like picking which fricking shirt to wear, though.

He quickly got out of his sweats and put the outfit on, looking at himself in the mirror.

Shit. The tie. The question wasn't even WHICH tie, rather: with or without tie?

Spencer came to the most logical and well-thought decision he'd made during that whole outfit-picking process: if he'd chosen to wear a tie, he would've had to spend another 15 minutes choosing which one. So, no tie. However, he wasn't used to not wearing one, so he tried not to stare too long in the mirror observing how strange he looked - and felt - without it.

He left the first two buttons of the shirt undone, and tried to un-mess his hair up - "c'mon I love your messy hair!", Derek's words popped into Spencer's head, making him giggle as he proceeded to put his shoes on.

He didn't even have the time to take one last look at the whole situation in the mirror, that he heard a knock on the door.

"Fuck." he gasped to himself.

"Coming!" he said as he quickly made his way to the door, jogging back and forth every 5 seconds to pick up pieces of clothing spread out on the floor and go back to squeeze them into his bag.

-

Derek waited in front of that damn door for what felt like 30 minutes.

He kept his eyes down at his feet and his hands in the pockets of his pants, as he tried to decipher the sounds coming from inside Spencer's room.

Much to his frustration, he spent the waiting time regretting having asked only that morning. He had actually done it on purpose to ask with little to no advance, so that Spencer couldn't say "no", knowing he'd be afraid to sound rude if he didn't accept. He didn't force him to do anything, though: Derek was 100% sure that he wanted to meet his family as his actual boyfriend - because he had met them a few times before, first as his co-worker, later as his best friend.

He was just trying to make the decision-making easier for him, coming to terms with the fact that he DID want to meet them a little quicker than he would have if Derek had asked him days and days before, hence had way too much time to think and rethink and go all paranoid.

Anyway, as it turned out, even that tactic had a couple of downsides: first of all, Spencer would've felt tenfold more nervous because of the lack of time to process the thing; second - which was a direct consequence of the former - it would've taken him a million years to get ready, leaving Derek out in the hallway for 5 minutes straight.

-

"Hey!" Spencer finally opened the door, nervously running his tongue in between his lips and adjusting his hair behind his ears. He also looked slightly out of breath.

"Hi" Derek greeted him back, smiling warmly. It took him a few seconds to realize what was standing in front of him. His man, looking handsome in those clothes.

He walked inside the room and turned around, watching Spencer as he closed the door. He gradually got closer and closer to him, forcing him to pull back until he was caged in between his broad body and the door, with no way out.

Derek placed a hand on his own hip and leaned against the door with his other forearm, just above Spencer's head. He bit his bottom lip in the attempt to stop smiling, staring carefully up and down at every inch of his boyfriend's fineness.

"How dare you" he murmured, knowing that Spencer understood perfectly that he was referring to how outrageously and disrespectfully good he looked.

"W- what are you talking about?" Spencer asked, playing dumb, courageously staring back right into Derek's deep eyes and not even making the slightest effort to contain his furious blush.

Derek didn't answer, instead he reached a hand toward Spencer's jaw, teasingly stroking his bottom lip with his thumb. He was inching closer definitely too slowly for Spencer's liking, to be completely honest.

Derek finally pushed his body against his, making Spencer's back produce a light smashing-like sound against the wooden door. He gasped in all the air he needed before making their lips collide dangerously, forcing a surprised moan out of Spencer's lungs.

"Mmhh...now... t's clear what you're...talking mm'bout" Spencer mumbled teasingly against his lips.

He wrapped his strong arms all around Spencer's body, as if it was threatening to fall on the floor, unravelling his hot tongue inside his mouth at last.

Derek's lips ran down to his jaw, allowing Spencer to catch his breath and his arms to finally grab onto him as his head fell back, hitting the door.

The second his mouth reached his ear, slightly biting his lobe, Spencer realized he couldn't take anymore of that without risking to rip off with his bare hands every single layer of clothing Derek was wearing.

"Ok w- wait, Derek wait a sec" he breathed out, unable to keep his eyes open and aware.

"Mhmh" Derek hummed unbothered, as the tip of his wet tongue brushed on the warm spot beneath Spencer's earlobe, before sucking it into his mouth.

"Ohw fuck- no s- seriously we're already late"

Derek suddenly stopped like Spencer had pushed a "OFF" button. He'd totally forgotten the reason why he got there in the first place, being so distracted by making his boyfriend's head spin and his body squirm uncontrollably.

"Holy shit. You're right." he said checking his watch, without pulling back from Spencer's body even a quarter of an inch.

After a few seconds of silence, while they rested their foreheads against one another to catch their breaths, Spencer spoke up.

"Believe me, I wouldn't have stopped you if it wasn't so important to me."

Derek distanced his face a little in order to look at him. "It is?" he asked with a sparkle in his eyes. "It's important to you?"

"Yes. I really want them to see us together like this." Spencer said smiling softly, caressing Derek's cheek.

"...well maybe not like this " the other answered chuckling, breaking the romantic mood Spencer's words and demeanor had set.

"Yeah right- you know what I mean!"

"I know." Derek concluded nodding, pecking at Spencer's already flushed lips one last time before letting go of him.

"It took me 30 minutes to come up with a decent outfit and you messed it up in 5, that's rude to say the least." Spencer said after a while, adjusting his hair and tucking his shirt back inside his pants.

"I'm sorry pretty boy, but you kinda asked for it." Derek justified himself, shrugging mockingly at him.

"...could say the same thing of you, though." he replied murmuring, not sure if he wanted Derek to hear him or not.

"What was that?" the other asked, even if having heard crystal clear, in fact.

"What?"

Derek snorted, inching once again very, very close.

"Baby, you're only making it worse, you must know that right?" he whispered with a smirk.

Spencer didn't answer, too busy looking at Derek's lips as he ran his tongue in between his.

"And, you're standing in my way."

Spencer frowned and shifted his gaze down, noticing Derek's hand was on the doorknob behind him: he was, indeed, standing in his way. He shot him a glare and stepped aside, so they could finally get out of the room.

The realization that they were about to have dinner with Derek's family as a couple fell onto him once again, out of the blue, easing whatever bit of heat was left inside his pants.

-

30 minutes later or so, they got to Derek's house. The car ride was strangely silent, probably because they were both nervous - even Derek was, a bit. He was just better at hiding it.

He parked the car and turned it off, deciding to wait a little before getting out. He looked over to Spencer, whose eyes were staring blankly at the small house outside.

"Hey," Derek spoke softly, placing his warm hand on his thigh in the hope to calm him down a little.

Spencer turned his head toward him as soon as he felt his touch, revealing quite an anxious look.

"It's gonna be great. And I bet I'm gonna find myself saying something like 'I told you so'." Derek tried to lift the mood, not needing him to say anything to gather what was troubling him. Still, he paused right after, letting him have the time to say it nonetheless.

"...what if they don't like me?" Spencer finally asked, his voice small and a little trembly.

"They already love you. I can guarantee you that."

"Yeah but I mean, what if they don't like me... this way? With you?" Spencer explained further, trusting that Derek understood what his main concern was. Which wasn't the possibility that they wouldn't like him as a person - because they did, as Derek said and as he already knew. It was the possibility that they wouldn't like him as his romantic partner. As his boyfriend.

"Spencer... they know already that we're together, you know that right? It's not news to them." Derek said furrowing his brows. "and they're not just 'ok' with it, they love it. This. Us." he added reassuringly, pointing between the two of them with his finger.

Spencer simply nodded in response, getting back to looking down at his knees.

Derek shifted in his seat to lean closer, moving his hand from Spencer's thigh to his chin to lift it.

"Baby look at me." he murmured. His heart swelled when Spencer followed the order, giving him puppy eyes.

"I love you. And they love you as much as I do. So they will love us too, for sure. Alright?"

"Alright." Spencer finally spoke, a shy smile on his pretty face.

"...I partly take that back though. Not possible for anybody else to love you as much as I do." Derek concluded on a cheesy note, winking and giving him his signature smile.

Spencer chuckled, refraining from face-palming and choosing instead to simply shake his head.

-

They finally got out of the car, after that 10 minute pep-talk. Derek made his way around it to reach Spencer, holding out his hand toward him.

Spencer looked at him, shifting his eyes back and forth between Derek's hand and his smiling face. He sighed, acting annoyed, when actually he thought it was very cute of him to decide they'd get to the front door holding hands.

He took it and crossed his fingers with Derek's, clenching it tight to try and lessen his anxiety.

When they arrived at the door - standing beside one another, but Derek a few inches ahead of him - Spencer inadvertently squeezed his hand even more the moment Derek rang the bell.

"Derek! My boy!" Fran opened the door only a couple of seconds later - she'd been probably waiting on them for quite a while - with a wide, shiny smile on her face. Each time he'd seen that smile over the years, Spencer got more and more convinced of whom Derek must have got it from. And he could only thank her for it.

A few moments after, Sarah and Desirée joyfully came to the door as well, the younger one clapping her hands and squealing a loud "yes!" as soon as she saw the couple holding hands. Spencer's whole body was blushing, but he was genuinely happy to be there, with Derek.

"Hey mama!" Derek greeted back entering the house, letting go of Spencer's hand to hug his mom and kiss her forehead, with a smile just as shiny as hers if not more.

"Oh, Spencer, it's so good to see you! Come here," she said closing the door, right before spreading her arms to hug him. She was so small even compared to his skinny frame, Spencer could only imagine how tiny she must have felt in Derek's strong arms.

"It's good to see you too, Mrs Morgan." he smiled back, a little embarrassed because, even if it was from his boyfriend's mother, it was still a hug after all.

"Oh please, don't call me that. You make me feel old!" she pleaded arching her brows, while the two greeted and hugged Derek's sisters as well.

"Old? You look younger than your own son!" Spencer joked.

"Uh excuse me, what side are you on now??" Derek replied, playfully messing Spencer's hair by untucking a strand of it with his fingers to let it fall over his face, causing him to scrunch his nose in that way. The others laughed affectionately at them.

The three women led the way toward the dining room, enveloped in a warm, homely light.

Spencer waited a second to sit down, letting the others choose their spots. Desirée and Sarah sat next to each other, asking that him and Derek mirror them; while their mom - who had temporarily excused herself to check on the food in the kitchen - was of course entitled to the seat at the head of the table.

-

Dinner proceeded serenely, between some small talk about their tough job and a lively laugh at some joke Derek or Desirée said. Anyone who had spent even just as little as 10 minutes in that house, could tell with zero doubts that those two where the pranksters of the family.

The food was so good, the company even better. No one had brought up any embarrassing topics, nor had made Spencer feel out of place or looked at him weirded out, whenever he'd thrown some of his beloved facts and infos in the conversation: he was struggling to believe it wasn't all a dream.

He used to always remind Derek how lucky he was to have a family like that, but he'd never stood by that statement so much like in that moment. And Derek had clearly noticed it, by how much he was enjoying himself.

At a certain point though, after God knows how many half hours had passed, when they had finished eating and were enjoying the faint inebriating effect of the wine, Sarah asked the question.

"So...since Derek has never really answered this clearly, and since your memory is kind of a big deal right? I'm gonna try and ask you..." she started, staring at Spencer with a grin on her face, keeping both him and Derek on their toes.

"...how did it happen?? Like, who confessed and when?"

"Sis we already talked about this!" Derek said face-palming, dramatically leaning back on his chair resigned to the fact that she would never stop asking until she was fed every teeny tiny detail.

"Shush! She's right, you never gave a legit answer!" Desirée added, coming to her sister's aid.

"Well, it's just fair that he hasn't given a clear answer because it's not easy to determine exactly when the 'confession' happened, cause there have always been a lot of...let's say mixed signals from both parts through the years, for lack of a better word" Spencer started. "but first of all I can safely say that Derek was the one who confessed first, and I guess that's kinda obvious being the confident, cocky kind of guy I think we can all agree that he is." he paused his narrative, turning his head to look at Derek's reaction while he accused him of being those things.

"Alright alright, I'll give you that. Keep going." Derek nodded smugly, shifting in his seat closer to Spencer to stretch his arm on the backrest of his chair.

"What's ironic though is, that it actually happened while we were FIGHTING, about a thing that happened on the job - which I'm not gonna elaborate cause I feel like 4 years, 1 month and 21 days later, he's STILL mad at m- hey! " Spencer got interrupted by a light hand-smack on his nape from Derek.

" 'Course I'm still mad at you, smartass!!"

"Alright, fair enough, point is," he cleared his voice in the attempt to stop chuckling. "point is, we had a big fight, and then Derek just...he just said it, out of nowhere." Spencer shrugged in conclusion to his story-telling, lowering his voice on that last bit, while drawing circles on the empty wine glass with his thumb.

There were a few seconds of complete silence, during which Derek stared at Spencer's perfect side profile, absorbed in that... life-changing memory he'd just brought back. "Life-changing" was the right adjective because he remembered very well that it hadn't been all good. But - seeing how things were now going between Spencer and him - certainly not even all bad. It sure as hell had changed their lives, though.

"See? It's not like I came dressed in white with a carriage and asked him to dance, lemme tell you we were fucking MAD at each other!" Derek broke the silence, speaking to his sisters.

"Alright, you could've just told us!" his mom replied among a choir of laughs, too amused by the comment to bother about the cuss that had slipped out of his son's mouth.

"Well I don't exactly strike as the dancer type, so with all due respect you guys could've easily ruled that out from the beginning!" Spencer added jokingly, supporting his boyfriend's thesis.

"You don't- what?? You asked me to dance just about a couple weeks ago at JJ's wedding, who're you tryna fool, genius??" Derek loved to joke around about that episode.

"But that's different! Slow dancing at weddings isn't dancing per say, that's common knowledge."

" 'common knowledge', blablabla, a'ight, we get it, you're the smartest in the room." Derek kept mocking him, rolling his eyes and air-quoting the words "common knowledge".

He reached his hand out to place it on the back of Spencer's head, affectionately running his slim fingers through his soft curls. "I'm still convinced you're a pretty good dancer." he added softly.

Spencer finally shifted his look from the glass to Derek's eyes, trying to hide his smile.

"That's not an unbiased opinion, though"

Derek's brows shot up. "Oh you're right, I forgot that you're my handsome, smart boyfriend for a second there. I do have a couple bias."

Spencer shot him a look that said: Jesus Christ, Derek. His cheeks could've easily melted like candle wax and he was about to fall off his chair from hearing that answer, so the stabbing glance was only fair - Spencer was clearly not yet worrying about the 100% worth probability of Derek later mentioning how "cute" and "adorable" his reaction and expression were in that moment. "You're lucky I didn't sprinkle that face of yours with kisses in front of everyone, pretty boy" he always said.

The three women didn't even try to interrupt that moment, absolutely struck by their chemistry. If anyone was still wondering how in the world two people so different like them could be a couple, it must've been because they hadn't yet seen a playful banter between those two like the one Desirée, Sarah and Fran had just witnessed. It was like watching a movie.

-

"Oh my! It's so late. You two should probably get back if you wanna get some sleep before your flight tomorrow." Fran pointed out half-heartedly, checking the clock hung on the wall in front of the table.

"You're right ma'. Though it's not like we get much sleep with this job anyway..." Derek added dry-wittingly and with a deep sigh, as he checked his own watch, too: it was around 10 pm. Not even so late if it were a normal day of work in Quantico, but unfortunately that wasn't the case. They had to drag their asses on the jet at 5 am the next morning.

Spencer was brought back to reality when they mentioned work, but mostly when Derek's warm fingers until then drawing patterns on his scalp abruptly pulled back; leaving him mentally complaining.

"Do you need help in the kitchen?" he asked Fran politely, seeing her standing up from her chair and starting to pile up the dishes.

"No baby c'mon, that's my job." Derek immediately dismissed the other's offer, before his mother had even had the time to do that herself; getting up too while subtly caressing Spencer's cheek with his knuckles.

The two managed to gather all the dirty dishes and glasses and cutlery in one run, and headed to the kitchen, leaving there a blushing Spencer - calling him "baby" in front of his family? Dear God - alone with Derek's sisters, in what he anticipated to be an awkward situation.

-

After an unsettling amount of seconds, Desirée's almost whispering voice breached through the silence, as if afraid of being heard from the other room.

"Ok so, the most important question now is-"

"Desi, come on!!" Sarah tried to stop her from asking what she was about to ask, lightly hitting her forearm with her hand.

"What?? You wanna know too, don't play innocent all of a sudden!" she lowered her voice once again, shifting her attention back to Spencer in front of her.

"As I was saying, question is... has he proposed yet? "

Spencer's brain stopped working - if that was even possible, for the genius with an IQ of 187. He should've expected such a question - should he, though? Really?? What the hell.

"No! No he- we've never talked about it, I don't- I don't know what he thinks of it, I don't even know what I think, to be honest" Spencer was having the hardest time putting his words together. If the topic had been marriage in general, he would've undoubtedly started blurting out statistics until everyone's ears were bleeding. But they were talking about Derek and his hypothetical marriage: he hadn't rehearsed for that one.

How was it possible that in all the years they'd been together, the thought of getting married hadn't even brushed his mind? Or Derek's? Was it a bad sign? Or maybe Derek HAD thought about it but was afraid of rejection? Wow. Yet another paranoid thought to haunt him now. Thank you, Desirée.

"But how's that possible?? You're literally the light of his life, I don't understand..." Sarah shared her thought out loud, crossing her arms and staring at an undefined spot on the table cloth, as if the lace embroideries could give her tangible answers to the question.

Spencer's smile was impossible to control now. He tried, he really did, but that night it seemed like they were all daring him to melt on the floor.

"Girls, don't steal him! I know he's pretty but he's MY pretty boy alright?" Derek's loud voice came from the kitchen, from where he could hear his sisters' bickering but couldn't decipher what they were saying - luckily.

Derek's comment was probably about the twentieth proof of what stated before - they were literally RACING on who would get Spencer's face to catch fire first.

-

Fran laughed at Derek's scolding, shaking her head.

"Well, for what it's worth, he really is gorgeous if you ask me." she said, finishing to wash the last fork and passing it to him so he could wipe it dry with a cloth.

"That makes two of us." Derek replied. "Actually a lot more than two, so I'm very lucky." he added, after being distracted by that thought for a few seconds.

"He's lucky too, you know? To have you in his life." his mom assured, affectionately stroking her son's shoulder with her small hand.

Derek sighed, finishing to dry the dishes out and rolling the sleeves of his button-up shirt back down to his wrists. "I don't know mama. Sometimes I feel like he's getting tired of me."

"Oh baby that's not possible, trust me. I've dated a bunch of guys when I was young, and the ones who looked at me like Spencer looks at you were the ones I had to dump because they never would have in a thousand years." she paused. "...until I met your father, and then we both looked at each other like that. Just like you two do." she concluded in a nostalgic tone, forcing a sad smile out of him.

"...have you asked him yet?" she changed the topic, after a long silence.

"Asked what?" Derek answered with a question, frowning.

"...to marry you? "

"What?? Mom, I don't know if- we've never even mentioned it- Jesus mama we don't even live together yet!" he replied, even more confused than before he got asked, trying to keep his voice low.

"Alright! No need to fuss like that! Take your time. But you should at least think about it, if you really wanna know what your mother thinks." she winked, before finally getting back to the other room, leaving Derek full of questions he didn't even know he had in the first place.

-

Spencer entered the small kitchen, holding Derek's leather jacket in his hand.

"You done?" he asked, handing it to him as Derek turned around to face him.

The man nodded in response, putting the jacket on.

"I wanna hear you say it." he then said, grinning at him with his arms folded on his chest.

"...say what?" Spencer asked, as if he didn't know what Derek wanted to hear, non-chalantly leaning against the counter.

Derek made a step closer, grabbing his jaw in one hand and trapping him between said counter and his hips.

"Just say it" he repeated, this time murmuring a few inches from his face.

Spencer tried to avoid his eyes, but it was almost impossible. Considering how he'd been kissed senseless against the door earlier in his hotel room, Spencer should've known better than to stand between Derek's body and whatever other vertical surface. He would never admit he didn't want to learn that lesson.

"...you were right." he finally confessed in a sigh, trying to contain his smile.

"Yes." Derek let out a whispered exult, before ultimately erasing that bit of space left between their lips. He cupped the back of Spencer's neck to prevent him from hitting the crown of his head against the metal handle of the cabinet above. Or to prevent him from escaping his mouth, whichever option one deems more realistic.

They kissed slowly and secretly, both struggling to stop the giggles and little smiles from interrupting it every 5 seconds, making it impossible for their tongues to keep prolonged contact.

-

The moment Spencer was starting to get carried away just enough to wrap his arms around Derek's neck, they heard an intentional fit of coughing coming from the threshold of the door.

They quickly and embarrassedly took their hands off of each other and turned around to face Sarah.

"Uhm, guys, it's starting to rain..." she said with a slight cringe on her face.

"Nice." Derek sighed. He took Spencer's hand and led the way out of the room and toward the front door.

They hugged and said their goodbyes to the three women, and Derek opened the door, letting Spencer out first.

His mom grabbed his arm before he could close the door behind his back. "Think about it." she mouthed, winking at her son.

Derek snorted and rolled his eyes in response.

When he stepped out and turned around, he saw Spencer looking blankly in front of them, sheltered by the porch, righteously frozen in spot and gaping: it wasn't simply "starting to rain". It was like someone from up there was literally pouring the whole Lake Michigan over their heads.

They exchanged a resigned look, before deciding unanimously to run toward the car, luckily parked only 30 ft away from the house.

-

"Shit." Spencer cursed under his breath when they finally got into the car, soaked from head to toe.

"Yeah" Derek agreed. "Maybe we can wait a lil until this mess calms down before heading back, what do you say?" he asked rhetorically.

"Most definitely." Spencer replied chuckling, tucking his wet hair behind his ears.

They stayed silent for a few minutes, listening to the relaxing sound of the water running down the windshield, making it absolutely impossible to distinguish the shapes of whatever was outside.

"So, uhm" Spencer broke the silence, interrupting himself immediately after to sigh annoyedly at his failed attempt to wipe dry his drooling-wet forehead with the sleeve of his equally wet jacket. He wanted to talk about that thing before he could lose any sleep over it.

"...your sisters asked me a question that left me...honestly, I don't even know if there's a word to describe my reaction in that moment." he continued, now pinching with his fingers the pants sticking to his thigh.

Derek's heart rate started to increase uncontrollably. He didn't say anything, letting Spencer finish, to have actual proof that he was gonna say what he thought he was gonna say; and just then, could legitimately freak out.

"Desirée asked if you had proposed yet." Spencer said straight up, still struggling to believe that he'd actually received such a question. "I didn't know how to justify the fact that neither of us has thought about it yet. I mean, should we have thought about it? Is it- is it an option? I don't even know I just- I don't know. I don't know what to think about this so please tell me that you have a vague idea of what to do with that question." Spencer finished talking, leaving Derek speechless. Now, he had the right to freak out.

Derek let his forehead drop on the steering wheel, chuckling to himself - he didn't even know where to start.

"A'ight, uhm...mom asked me, too." he finally confessed, pulling himself together just enough to sit up straight again. "I don't know if it was all calculated, but it wouldn't be surprising if it was, now would it?"

"Definitely not." Spencer replied laughing.

Derek cleared his voice and got a little more serious. "Of course I told her I didn't ask you to marry me... yet. I guess. Dammit, I don't know, am I supposed to know?"

"I don't know!"

"How are we even gonna talk about it if we don't know? She told me to 'think about it', think about what??" Derek was freaking out way more than Spencer was, which was the most unexpected turn of events ever.

"Ok Derek stop for a second." Spencer said in a soothing tone, turning slightly to his left to look at him better as he grabbed his hand. Derek quieted down and stared deep into his boyfriend's gentle eyes, entwining their fingers together.

"It's hard to picture it because of our job. That's literally the whole point. The only point, to be fair, cause- look, I don't know if I wanna get married, what I know is that I...I think I wouldn't mind spending the rest of my life with you...you know? It sounds cheesy I know, but there's no other proper way to say it..."

Spencer's words calmed Derek down. He let go of his hand to caress the back of his neck, staring silently at him as his smart brain formulated the next things to say.

"and- and maybe, in the future, when the job and everything else falls into place...maybe we could consider signing a piece of paper, I guess. But the point is that if you asked me in this exact moment I'd say yes because- because yes, I want to be with you- but there's no pressure what so ever cause this is what I think and maybe I'm not making any sense to you right now and you don't ever wanna get married or...or be with me forever and- and it's ok, I'm just tryna figure my thoughts out-"

"Kid. It does. It makes sense to me, too. All of it." Derek was the one speaking sensibly now. He leaned closer and started to run his fingers through Spencer's damp hair to relax him.

"...do you want me to give you statistics about divorces within the first 3 years of marriage in homosexual couples?" Spencer asked after a few seconds of silence, though it wasn't so much a question rather an excuse to put a halt to the gears overdriving in his mind.

Derek burst into such a glee, beautiful sounding laugh, Spencer was on the verge of swooning. He swore if saying lame jokes was the way to hear that laugh 24 hours a day, he would've recorded himself saying them and played them to him non-stop. That was husband material, no doubt.

"Baby, you know I'm always here to listen to your ramblings, but I really don't think we should be discussing divorces before even having got married, what do you think?" the man said eventually, once his laugh had quieted down.

Even having predicted such an answer, the words Derek said and the way he said them didn't fail to make Spencer giggle and flush - a downside to his attempted teasings he'd found himself fall into a quadrillion times during the years. Another of many lessons he wasn't quite willing to learn.

-

After that, they stayed in silence for a while, staring into each other's eyes. From the sound of it, they noticed the rain had almost completely settled down.

Spencer timidly inched forward and laid a kiss on the corner of Derek's lips.

"I love you." he whispered, before placing his palm behind his neck to push him deeper into his mouth.

The moment Spencer pronounced those words and blessed him with one of his sugar-kisses, Derek started to contemplate that if spending the rest of his days with that man meant wet-making out in the car; and cozy family dinners, awkward questions included; and that sweet voice of his endlessly pouring his smart - oh, so smart - brain out to him at 3 am; and velvet tongue healing his bruised skin; and slow dancing even if it wasn't "dancing per say"; and feather-like fingers drawing goosebumps underneath his clothes; and being unable to stay angry at such a gorgeous face for too long - then he could've signed that piece of paper right there, right then.

When he woke up from that thought, Derek realized that the gap between their car seats that was keeping their bodies apart was starting to bother him. He pulled out of that tongue-melting kiss.

"We should get going now that it's not raining anymore." he said breathily.

Spencer nodded, swallowing the rich taste Derek's mouth left into his. "Yeah." he shivered. " 'm starting to get cold..."

Derek started the car, smirking as Spencer's words prompted a very specific thought to crawl its way into his head.