John, when reaching through the white house, zaps into the body of one character of the mod's choice, possessing their body, the effects being permanent.
âBut you say thislittle house thing is intangible?â you ask Vriska, still mildly confused aboutwhat the deal with that tantrum was about.
âSo I canât touch it?â
Vriska looks at you, annoyed. âYeah, Iâm pretty sure thatâswhat intangible means!â
You decide to ignore that jab at your intelligence for thesake of keeping the team together. United, you can do anything. âWhat happensif I try?â you ask instead.
Vriska glances down at the juju warily. âI dunno if I woulddo that if I were you.â
You shrug, kneeling down next to it. âIâm not too worried.This is just my dream hologram self, or some nonsense. How many times hasMeenah stabbed me with her fork?â
âNot enough blue stooge,â Meenah mutters under her breath,the Breeze carrying her voice to your ears. âNot enough by a nautical mile.â
âAnd I always wake up fineâ you say, again electing toignore that comment.
âItâs not just about you, John,â Vriska says cautiously. âThisis a very powerful juju. Youâd be messing with some forces we donât fullyunderstand.â
âSounds like a dare to me,â Aradia chimes in cheerily.
âOh my god,â Vriska says, facepalming. âAlright, whatever. Iâllbe fucked if suddenly Iâm gonna be the lone voice of prudence and soundjudgement in our badass pirate club.â She looks up at you over the top of herhand. âIf you really wanna plunge your fist through some sort of hole inreality, then be my guest!â
You reach down into the juju, bracing with your other handon the floor. You feel something sharp prick you almost immediately after youpush it through. Pulling your hand out reveals that youâre not bleeding, so,this time more cautiously, you move your arm back in. Blue lightning arcs up tomeet you, wrapping around your arm.
âWhoaâ, you say, dazedly. You feel⌠numb, like not all ofyour nerves are reporting back properly. âThis is making me feel weird.â
You hear Vriska say something, but you canât make out what.Itâs like sheâs speaking to you through four walls while youâre underwater.
Suddenly, the lightning grabs your arm and pulls. You yellout, Â trying to resist, trying to pullback, but whatever force is driving it is much stronger than you are. Vriskasays something else, this time even less audible. Then you hear a pop.
You open your eyes. Youâre staring up at a golden ceiling.Okay. So youâre back on the ship. All things considered, waking up is a pretty favorableoutcome. You wouldnât want to end up trapped in some nether realm for alleternity. That would suck.
âWhat nether realm?â you hear Jade say, groggily.
Wait. You didnât say that out loud.
âUh, yes you did, you dumb-dumb.â
Okay, you DEFINITELY didnât say that last bit out loud.Something weird is going on here.
Then a hand comes up and rubs at your eye, and you launchyourself into the air.
âWhoâs there?â you say, on alert. Or rather⌠Jade says that?You could have swornâŚ
Jade screams, and you cover your ears, shutting your eyestightly. âHelp!â she yells. âSomeoneâs moving my body!â
âMe too!â you yell, but again your ears tell you Jade saidthose words. âAnd I sound like you! Whatâs going on?â
Jadeâs screams stop. You take a deep breath, even though younever told your body to do that. Youâre incredibly unnerved by this.
âJohn,â Jade says,slowly and clearly. âIâm going to put myleft hand on my head. Okay?â
âOkay,â you respond, unsure where sheâs going with this.Again, Jadeâs voice replies for you. What could be causing that?
Your left arm raises up and puts itself onto your head. Youdidnât tell it to do that. This feels so weird.
âNo, but I did,â Jadesays, control returning to her voice.
Okay, youâre stating to panic a bit. âHow do you know what Iâmthinking?â you shout, confused. âAnd how did you move my arm? And why do I sound like you!â
âYouâre in my body!â she exclaims, now much more animated.
Your brain just kind of stops.
Your body claps its hands together excitedly. âThis is amazing! John, we have so muchscience to do here! Can we both use our powers? What happens if we try to dodifferent things at once? WhatâŚâ
âSlow down!â you interrupt her. You need to wrap your headaround this.
So youâre in Jadeâs body? And youâre both sharing that body?
âUh, duh, obviouslythatâs whatâs happening.â
âOkay, whatever it is youâre doing there, please stop.â
She does, at least to an extent. You canât hear her voiceanymore, but you can sort of⌠feel her. A mass of bubbly excitementsurrounding your thoughts, omnipresent.
Suddenly, a thought occurs to you. âWait,â you say. âHow doyou know Iâm in your body? You could be in mine!â
The presence in your mind shifts to being mildlyexasperated. âWell, for one,â she says, âweâre both talking in my voice. Andfor another, try looking down.â
You didnât notice before, but as Jade was speaking just then,you could feel your lips move, your tongue undulate, and your vocal cordsvibrate. This is so weird. But you doas she says, and immediately notice the breasts. The space symbol as well, butmostly the breasts. You feel Jadeâs amusement at that fact.
âOh,â you say, simply.
You immediately try to cup them in your hands, but they slipright out of your grasp. Jade starts laughing.
Sharing a body with someone else is hard. You donât like the same foods despite sharing a tongue, someal times often devolve into a comic slap-fight with your body-mate over whatto eat. You have different interests, so while you want to sit down and want amovie, Jade wants to go out and garden. Youâve come to the compromise ofalchemizing a computer and a monocle together so you can do bothsimultaneously, but Jade still tires of your perfectly normal cinematic preferences every now and then.
Itâs also incredibly awkward. You canât count the number oftimes youâve fallen over because you both tried to walk the body in twodifferent directions. You and Jade have different preferred sleeping positions,so itâs difficult to get to sleep at night. Itâs impossible to get any alonetime, despite how much both of you want it sometimes. And you still have noidea how to wash your hair, much to Jadeâs delight.
Itâs also, uh⌠awkward.You were very quiet the first time you used the toilet together â youâve mostlygotten over that, but itâs still disconcerting having someone else there whileyou do it. It also turns out that Jade is, uh⌠very sexually active. She getsherself â and by extension, you â off at least three times a day; and sheâs good at it, too. Most of the time, youcanât tell who it is thatâs moaning.
You draw the line when she tries to finger your ass, though.You donât think you can deal with thatjust yet. Or maybe ever.
Despite how good those sessions make you both feel, youhavenât yet worked up the nerve to take the reins during those sessions,despite Jade goading you on. Perhaps one day.
Still, despite the drawbacks, the annoyances, and theoccasional fights, youâre both happy â Jade even moreso than when you were separated,which you still find amazingly odd.
It turns out you can both still use your powers. Jade canshrink the body down and grow it again, phase through walls, teleport the body,teleport other things⌠seriously, her powers are amazing. You too can stilluse yours, turning you both into wind, blowing things around, making miniaturetornadoes. You wish you had powers as cool as hers, but Jade insists yours arethe coolest â and you can feel she means it every time. Maybe itâs just somesort of superpower-envy.
Whatâs even more amazing, though, is when you can each usethe otherâs powers as well. As such,youâve been spending a lot of time training, leaning to use both of yourabilities in sync. During your regular dungeon crawling, youâve slowly learntwhen to let Jade take the reins, and she too has learnt when to leave you incontrol. Youâre good at different things; together you become more than eitherof you ever were alone.
Itâs also great because now you donât have to walk to thefridge when you want ice cream - you can just teleport it straight into yourlap. Score.
When the troll empress tries to corrupt your body-mate, youfight back.
You both feel a force barreling inwards, trying to take overJadeâs mind â but what the Condesce doesnât know is that thereâs two of you inhere. You push back against her will, trying to keep your body-mate safe â How dare sheâ˝ â and partly succeed. You shoveback just enough so that you can both communicate with each other. You donâttalk, not even telepathically â youâve long since learned to interpret herthoughts directly, as has she for your own. Data and ideas are exchanged fasterthan you possibly could through speech alone, and just as the Condesce is onthe precipice of seizing Jade, you both decide what to do.
Jade grasps your hands around your neck, digs in, andtwists. You hear a snap.
By the time you both revive, the Condesce is dead. It turnsout fancy psychic powers canât save you from a sniper shot to the brain. Whowouldâve thought. You both thank Roxy (who seems very confused by the whole âweâreboth thanking youâ thing), and teleport you all â Jane, Jake, Roxy, and yourbody â to the others, to preparing to fight the Jacks.
âSo whereâs John?â is the first thing out of Daveâs mouth.
Youâre both confused for a moment, before Jade laughs andsays âWeâre in the same body now!â
Pretty much everyone tilts their head at you, silently askingfor clarification. Roxy just makes an âOâ face, finally realizing what yourdeal is, and Rose just smiles. âWell, this should be⌠interesting,â she says,a smirk slowly forming.
Neither of you ask her what she means by that.
As it turns out, âdivide and conquerâ is an incrediblyviable strategy. Instead of fighting everyone at the same time, itâs mucheasier for almost everyone to fight one baddie at a time while one person keepsthe others occupied. They didnât stand a chance.
Jade wasnât entirely unaffected by having to kill effigiesof Becquerel, though. Itâs hard to hug someone you share a body with, but youdamn well tried, and even if it wasnât very effective she nonethelessappreciated the gesture.
As everyone starts forming up on the victory platform thing,Jade looks the body up at Skaia. Thereâs a brilliant flash of magenta light,then a wave of dust sweeps out and over you. You shield your eyes, and afterthe wave passes and you both look up again, thereâs a universe there.
âWell?â Karkat says, impatient. âWhat are we standing aroundfor? Remember what happened last time we fucked around instead of opening thatdamn door?â
âHe has a pointâ,you both think simultaneously. And so, with a slightly trembling hand, you bothgrasp the knob and twist.
You donât know what exactly awaits you on the other side.Will there be a bustling civilization, reminiscent of the home you once had?Will there be a blank slate, and youâll have to rebuild society from squareone? Will you even have physical forms at all?
But no matter what awaits you both, there is one thing youâresure of.
And thatâs that whateverâs out there, whatever challengesyou may face, youâll face them together. Two minds in one body, united inpurpose, singular in desire. You have Jade, and Jade has you.
And that, you think, as a blinding light sweeps over youboth, is enough.
