#seraphcastiel

what does is mean if it all means nothing

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a canon-divergent fic of "lily sunder has some regrets"

cw: aftermath of sexual assault, discussions of past abuse

“Do you see it?” Cas says. The room is so still his words clatter like dropping marbles. “When you look at me, do you see it?”

“See what?”

“Ruin.”

Sam’s gaze immediately snaps back to Cas. “No.” He takes in the pinch of grief on Cas’ brow; the dryness of his taunt eyes; the open, exposed way he’s placed himself before him. Inviting inspection, condemnation. “I don’t see anything but you.”

“I can feel it, though.” His throat works to swallow down something. “I’ve felt it for centuries.”