#selfregulation

If you’ve been quietly carrying too much and trying to “just push through,” this is your sign to stop. You don’t need to be drowning in stress to deserve support. You deserve to feel steady, resourced, and emotionally safe. Even when life is messy. Especially then.

That’s why I make workbooks and spiritual support offers that meet you where you actually are—not where you think you should be. Download one now or book a session that gently guides you back to yourself.

Here are 10 ways to draw the line with less drama:

1. Become aware of and name your limits. Reflect on past situations where you felt uncomfortable and ask yourself why.

2. Let the people in your life know you are working on boundaries. Start with a close friend or family member and express your intentions.

3. Ask for support in setting and keeping your boundaries. Seek out a mentor or therapist who can guide you in this journey.

4. Openly communicate your boundaries. Practice clear and assertive communication, ensuring you're understood.

5. Celebrate when you set a boundary. Reward yourself, even if it's just with a moment of self-recognition.

6. Be curious when you're triggered. Did you discover a new boundary? Journal about the experience to understand your feelings better.

7. Reiterate and uphold your boundaries when they are crossed. Stay consistent, reminding others if necessary.

8. Predictably increase consequences for repeat boundary crossers. Consider distancing yourself from those who consistently disrespect your limits.

9. Embrace saying no more. Remember, saying 'no' can be a form of self-care.

I find sometimes well meaning people ask me why I don't "get out more" or engage more socially. I have realised that this may be due to the fact that others may find these activities rewarding and help regulate themselves when feeling down or burnt out. I am in fact the opposite; when I am experiencing burn out, I need to switch off, reconnect to nature, and engage in solitary activities such as drawing, walking, and playing the piano to regulate my energy. 🦄🌈🧠♾🤗⚡️⏸🔋

#AskingAutistics: Are there certain things you find energy replenishing or energy depleting that others may not?

[Text: I have discovered that activities that I often find energy depleting, others find energy replenishing. For example, when I am experiencing burnout the last thing I want to do is go out socialising, whereas some of my non-autistic friends find this calming. Shadia Hancock. Copyright Autism Actually, 2021]

I didn’t plan on spending so much time doing the task and snap out of it when my focus breaks for a second.

I get overwhelmed by how big the task is and I flounder.

Though I know how to do the task I am not grounded and my awareness level is dealing directly with stuff and myself that I had been unconscious of. It is overwhelming the depth of my unconsciousness and lack of doing before this moment.

Overwhelm and am programmed to feed myself when overwhelmed either with media or actual food probably sugar and crap food. Both unconscious actions are a form of me shutting down and sleeping is the same.

Uncertainty on what to do because I have conflicting goals and messages going on in my head and am in a reactive state and not fully contientous to the thoughts and the influence they are having.

Was not realistic in my goal when I started and so I have an opposite reaction down the road in rebellion for commiting/expecting more than I should do tonight.

Responsibility shut down.

Haven’t done “fun” things yet and like a little child I rebel and get upset at my life cuz I haven’t done what I expect to be fun.

Time is running out in the day and I feel unsatisfied that I haven’t reached out to people or done my to do list. What to fill the spot and how could cleaning my room do that?

Definitely learned a lot in these theories and self reflection. Definitely a mix of these and they are apply but not all in this situation tonight. It’s amazing how powerful commiting to creating theories is. I only had one idea at the top of my head when I started the post.

I am hungry so I am going to go get some food maybe a calming drink to help my health and sleep and toast or something.