#selfdepricating

Me in my natural habitat

Me: ..... Fuck you

I would like to stop feeling sick now, and be able to eat more than one meal a day. I love food, or at least I used to, but in the last few weeks food has become an almost enemy. When you feel like you're going to throw up all of the time, not just from eating something (or from not), but from taking a sip of water, you don't want to eat. Food has turned from a comfortable safe haven into something I could really do without (hence the drop of a stone and a half in 4 weeks). I want my food back. I want to eat and enjoy it,  not have to make sure I'm near a bathroom in case my insides decide that the food was evil and probably plotting some awful world domination/puppy killing/not-saying-please-and-thank-yous assault on my mind and body and so should leave now, thanks, bye. This almost complete food aversion coupled with bad sleeping and being a bit of a big teary mess has meant that life has been a little hard to handle of late, at a time when I have looming deadlines, sick grandparents and all the rest. So if it could be possible for someone to make this a little better please? Even if it's not a full reverse back to normal, being given a big hug and told it's ok to cry while having my head stroked and my tears wiped away, that would be pretty awesome. Thanks a million, lots of love, may the odds be forever in your favour, Gillian x