#self-regulation

I don’t do well with lies. Telling and maintaining them requires much mental energy. I prefer using that energy for all the other things like self-regulation. Plus, the stress over sitting with a lie means a self-inflicted need to deal with a dysregulated nervous system. Honesty is easier convey, but just as taxing. In the realm of little white lies, being honest hurts feelings. My wife demanded…

Cybernetics (the study/practice of control and communication in systems) serves as the foundation of software engineering, even of computing more broadly. It provides a framework for understanding how systems maintain stability, adapt to change and reach desired states through self-regulation.

The mechanisms doing the work are feedback loops, which reach every layer of development. Thereby enabling engineer productivity, system robustness and agent reliability. When applied to AI, feedback loops reduce a system's sensitivity to any given LLM's quirks, so performance becomes model-agnostic and more consistent.

Asking autistics, what's your relationship with music?— Autistic Lauren 🏳️‍⚧️ 🏳️‍🌈 (@Autistic_Lauren) May 27, 2026 Music soothes my inner beast. It creates regulation so well, I easily play some songs on loop. I obsess on a song which becomes the center of my plays until I move on. That can take hours to years. Example: A couple summers ago, I re-watched Into the Spiderverse and played What’s…

🐾💛 From owls to bears to humans… this is how it’s always worked Nervous systems don’t learn through lectures, isolation, or fear.They learn through proximity. Through presence. Through being with someone who feels safe enough to borrow calm from. 🤍When your child comes to you overwhelmed, they’re not looking for a solution—they’re looking for your calm nervous system. 🧠And over time…what they…

Why was 2019 so pivotal? Maybe because there was a looming shadow over the world and we all didn't quite know how much of a spiritual awakening we were all going to be forced into. Or at least I thought then. I hypothesised over constellatory thinking and making as a method of approaching critical practice more so than a project I would demonstrate for one semester. We were all fairly asleep in 2019 and by the end of it - it was as though something had died in the universe and time itself was about to introduce us to something else.

Fast track to 2020, everyone questioned everything, but only within the constraints of controlled environmental phenomena. One couldn't help but feel as if life was happening to them. We were forced to adapt meaning people, dreams, and situations fell away while new insights, resourcefulness, and temperance became the new norm. 2021-2022: the collective consciousness eased up because we needed to. People needed connection and people needed to make meaning more than ever and were too traumatised to explore the present. Everybody just wanted a new normal or one that was close enough to the one we had before. How did we get back to normal? If anything, we'd been operating at such an unconscious level that the old normal now seems incredibly unreachable. The more you know... or the more you fuck around - the more you find out.

We seem to be forced to know more everyday - and as much as you don't need to know everything - the truth is that we are bombarded by information at every corner. You can't help but know about what conspiracy or allegation gets passed around about a political leader, world power, war criminal, or predator. You can't help but know about high-profile drug operations, the Ep*tein files, people like D1ddy, the horrors of your local neighbourhood, the traumas of your brothers and sisters, and the harsh realities of what those in your circle - and strangers on the internet - are living through.

You'd do well to regulate the kind of information you show yourself; it is not to say - go censor yourself - unless of course you feel more than capable of handling the information, but surely; the release of information that exists outside the boundaries of what is socially acceptable, taboo-even, and completely removed from anything humanly imaginable must have a damning impact on the collective psyche. Genres like true-crime serve to educate and of course bring awareness to the atrocities that are part of humanity - Even though it is hard to consume. Historically, what may be more alarming is the increasing levels of complex *organised* barbarism that continues to survive in humanity's psyche that concern me. Those who act in anomalous ways are deemed outliers of society, whose behaviour and inclinations seem to pose a threat to the idea that humanity can save itself. If data is corrupted, one needs to go back to the drawing board and find a new way to capture data that minimises the possibility - completely - to ensure it is accurate and true. With humanity, there is no cure. We are probably the most nihilistic creatures on Earth.

The one positive I can take out from this monologue is that I could try to be a little less nihilistic everyday. On the level of what goes into my body, on the level of what I think, on the level of what I consume, whose presence I surround myself with, what kind of conversations I have - and how I could try to hot wire my nervous system to recover from - what feels like eternity - 20-fucking-19.

In business analytics, I find comfort in the fact that we have come up with various systems of thinking and processing artifacts of human intervention to 'make things work'. Better yet - streamlined. I've always been someone who was more solutions-oriented; as in I can't stand to dwell too long on what isn't working. Although I can identify the gaps in my own processing system, I needed to find thought processes of value to help me restore the imbalance in my subconscious because everything pre-2019 feels like it has lost its weight. It's like leaving behind a legacy system that - foreseeably - will no longer be able to operate at the efficiency that the future state needs it to be.

I believe periodically rewiring your own system (could be your thought patterns/beliefs/goals/processes) is necessary and anticipating the new system you need to be on - for your own good - is the only thing that can help you save yourself. After all, it's a part of adaptation and sometimes you may need to take a more mechanical approach to assessing where you stand, what you stand for, and where you feel you want to be.

Photo by Roger Brown on Pexels.com Even if it were possible to practice self-care perfectly, which it is not because as human beings we are imperfect, we are still bound to get dysregulated—-e.g., thrown off our game, go into fight/flight/freeze/fake mode, have something unexpected happen, etc. And it doesn’t take much for neurospicy people to become dysregulated. For example, I spill or drop…