#self destructive behavior

So uh, like I said before this is NOT the first time they've done stuff like this!! Basically the first girl has made comments about my weight before (and is part of the reason why mine had gotten so bad in the first place) which is why I had to tell her the first time to not make those kinds of remarks which she partially seemed to follow? Like sometimes she would say "you're really going to eat that?" Or would brag about how thin she was at different points, but it wasn't overly bad and the other girl said that i was just overthinking it so I kinda let it slide.

I guess maybe it was just the stress of today, but for some reason her commenting on it today really pissed me off pretty badly. It's pretty clear already, but I generally don't get upset that easily or argue often and usually try to diffuse the situation or give up/into whatever they're trying to argue about. I tried to word my response as politely as I could while still making my point clear, but it still managed to make her mad apparently?

I live in a small town (I think it's considered a village actually based on population), so practically everyone knows each other. I've always been the "quiet, weird, mentally-ill girl" especially considering that's also how people knew my mother (who had all sorts of mental problems and addictions in her teenage years (aka when she had me), though she's finally gotten professional help now). The few people in real life who become friends with me usually do so as a joke or because they know that even if they do something harmful, nobody will care enough to help me even if they DID believe it. (I have a lot of past experiences with that mindset that I won't touch on, but I'm assuming most people reading can infer parts anyways)

That girl, along with her friend that blocked me after the whole thing, were some of the only classmates I had that even somewhat accepted me. They would make fun of me often and weren't exactly nice (or really friends at all), but it was enough of a connection to where I wouldn't have to sit alone at school and people generally would leave me alone as long as I was with them. The main girl (who atp I'm just gonna call "E" for simplicity's sake) ALSO has an eating disorder, and actively encourages people to starve themselves to look prettier. I started recovery a few months ago, and while she didn't entirely cut me off obviously, she started being more passive-aggressive I guess? Like the comments that I mentioned before. It's also worth noting that E and her friend regularly would make fun of my disorders and neurodivergence past just normal jokes. (Aka constantly calling me slurs and talking about how I was "bound to be in the psyche ward" and just overall shitty comments)

I guess what tipped me off and made me more shocked and upset than just frustrated was that last message that E sent me. I don't need to tell you for you to know why that was fucked up. People (not usually "friends" thankfully, but people nonetheless) have told me things like that quite a few times before, but never so plainly? That was just.. wow. I'm still in shock over that honestly.