Christmas celebrations are, or have become, a tradition in many places all over the world, of merrymaking and togetherness with family and friends. Growing up in Japan, in a household that happened to celebrate few holidays to begin with (a story for another time), let alone Christmas, it had always seemed to me like a time when one could be transported to a magical realm filled with lights and mirth. Back then - we’re talking about several decades ago - Christmas celebrations were naturally overshadowed by preparations for and celebration of New Year’s Day, the traditionally biggest holiday of the year in Japan. Small contingencies of Christians, Western expatriates, and American servicemen stationed there, celebrated Christmas as much as they could. At the same time, in a unique way, Christmas in Japan took roots and evolved its own traditions and customs - Christmas cakes, cardboard red boots filled with candies, roasted chickens, illuminations - and of course, presents for the kids from Santa Claus.
Fast forward to today. Now, I see that Christmas celebrations in Japan, while remaining secular, have only gotten more popular and bigger. Illuminations are everywhere, with notably impressive spots reported for and flocked to by the merrymakers. Christmas markets, which appear to be more of an European tradition, are now replicated in various towns and cities there. Giant Christmas trees are set up by various commercial entities for the enjoyment of the public. Some delightful treats such as puddings and mulled wine have been imported. Some fads like ugly Christmas sweaters have even made their way there. And yet - Christmas cakes, red cardboard boots full of candies, roasted chickens, and presents from Santa endure.
Kids write to Santa. They look forward to the presents come Christmas morning. Grownups exchange gifts with loved ones.
Christmas in Japan is also squarely celebrated as the most romantic holiday for lovers. One might say nothing is more romantic than a stroll with your love in streets redolent in jewel-like illuminations in the evening, with faint sound of carols in the distance, cold weather giving ample excuses to hold hands and stay close enough to feel each other’s warmth - for the Japanese who are mostly still somewhat shy about PDA.
Having now spent well over the majority of my life here in the U.S., Christmas still to this day brings me a curious sense of joy. As corny as it may sound, and for the lack of better expressions, there is something magical about it.
Commercialization of this holiday has been a hot topic for some time now - and I’ve often wondered if people really enjoy the holiday. How many people, though? What do they enjoy?
It’s not so much the commercialization, but consumerism.
My Christmas tree, with rose gold foil needles and white lights, stays up year round. It gets properly decked with mishmash of ornaments every December. The best time I ever spent during holiday seasons through the years was when I was wrapping Christmas presents, with the Christmas album by Diana Krall playing, while getting ever so slowly intoxicated with a glass (or two) of mulled wine. For all intents and purposes, I should have been stressed out from the law school finals, yet I really wasn’t.
Back again to today. It’s been years since last time Christmastime had been relaxing. For years, it has revolved around what to buy for whom, what to bring where, or - work.
Overtime. Holiday pay. Bonuses.
Chores. Errands. Obligations.
As I delve more and more deeply into a research rabbit hole for my creative writing aspirations, I started seeing a discernible difference between the celebration styles between two cultures I know most intimately. This holiday of Christian tradition celebrated secularly in Japan, means to the residents there, the time to merry-make and spend with family and friends, rather than shopping for the most expensive, trendiest, or even most number of gifts. Or cooking a big traditional feast. Or competitively decorating and illuminating your home.
Like I said - consumerism.
Making a two-hour drive to my sister-in-law’s home today for the Christmas Eve dinner, all these thought were swirling in my head as fast as the passing landscapes outside the window. I turned and asked my husband - have you ever had a romantic Christmas?
No, he said. Christmas has always been a hectic, chaotic, and often stressful holiday with very little time for himself, he went on.
His response was not completely unexpected - after all, I have been part of such celebrations for nearly two decades now. I must say that there is a particular kind of fun in it. The togetherness. Sense of family in front and center.
But it did startle me a little. Did you ever enjoy it, I asked him. Do you ever look forward to it, as an adult?
He thought about it for a spell. Then he said, “I don’t know.”
Well then, I said, we must spend a romantic Christmas together the next chance we get. We are lovers, after all. We’ll get away. I want us to spend a romantic and relaxing Christmas together, just us. I don’t want you to miss out on this. I want you to relax and enjoy it.
So, here is what I would love for everyone. And I mean everyone.
I would love for everyone to be able to look forward to, relax in, and enjoy Christmastime. Not the presents. Not the bonuses. Just to be able to enjoy yourselves by spending the time together with your loved one, or loved ones. To spend it doing what brings you joy. If shopping brings you joy, enjoy it. If baking and cooking brings you joy, bake and cook away. Listen to Christmas music. Watch Christmas movies. And of course, if watching your children’s faces light up the moment they open their presents under the tree is what you live for, go for it.
Whatever lets you enjoy spending this time of the year.
Please be kind to yourself. Please do not stretch yourself too thin and sacrifice things that cannot ever be regained or recouped.
Year after year, I wish everyone the same thing.
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays. Be well.
