#sbnation

I know I shared a post on this earlier today, but I really want to reiterate that @sbnation's 17776: What Football Will Look Like In The Future is absolutely worth the read.

In honor of the day from which no one will be ever be born or age or die ever again, and because it is a very driveable distance away from me, I decided to visit the forgotten lawn that no one has ever walked on, the sidewalk where no one walks except every 30-40 years and the unnamed pond where no one fishes and have some lunch.

Triptych of the same location: From left to right, from 17776, altered and stylized October 2016 Google Earth/Maps image, then screen capture from Google Maps of the same location, and finally, the same location as taken by me on April 7, 2026.

Aerial view of the office park in question, stylized from Google Earth image, followed by a triptych of the same office building as take from a moving car along I-290 East in Schaumburg, IL.

I found the forgotten lawn!! I took a little walk along the grass, and it must have been a fortuitous day because I saw a random friend-I-don't-know who was walking on the sidewalk where no one walks but once every 3 or 4 decades!

Pardon the dorky headset in my ear - I was doing all of this while listening to the Integrity crew make a ship-to-ship conference call to the International Space Station Expedition 74 and geek out about their shared space-nerdiness!

(Incidentally during this call, the ISS crew revealed that they were on the other side of Earth when Integrity set the distance record behind the moon for the furthest distance humans have traveled from Earth so that they could be the humans that were the furthest from Integrity! I love space nerds!)

I then decided to go sit by the pond with no name and eat my lunch while listening to 8 astronauts be silly together.

I also decided that since I'm destroying the 17776 timeline anyway, I may as well bring one more paradox into existence.

(If you would like to update the pond's name in your own Google Maps, you can do so here)

jon bois : today we are going to talk about Jack Glasscock. Here's a 5 minute intro ostensibly about King of Queens that will tie into this baseball player.

clip from King of Queens : My name might as well be Fatty McButterpants.

jon bois : jack glasscock hit a double. here's a chart of every at bat in major league history.

newspaper article about jack glasscock being presumed dead in a train crash by the pittsburgh press but then showing up fine a week later

jon bois : he injured his hand and never hit that well again. despite being one of the best hitters in mlb history, he never made the hall of fame.

clip from King of Queens : it's called gravity douglas and it's coming for you

jon bois : in the end, glasscock was considered the King of Shortstops. But since he won the batting championship in New York City, he was also considered The King of Queens.

clip from King of Queens : Dad, I told you. If you want a grilled cheese sandwich, I will make you one.

I liked the video so I go to their channel and see what else they got and I’m really enjoying it. And I get far enough back in their history and it’s just football and basketball videos which aren’t really my cup of tea. But I find a short one that sounds interesting and I watch it and at the end it says you can find more videos like this on sbnation

…

Sbnation released 17776. The editing was reminiscent of 17776 because the same goddamn people made the banana video