in which you canât stop thinking about satoru, after you share a drunk kiss at a partyÂ
authorâs note: writing this to avoid being too sad and to avoid my post-eras tour depression
**part of my satoru as taylor swift songs series
You fumble the door closed, your hands aimlessly pushing the lock of the door closed as you face the mirror.Â
Fuck. Who the hell let you keep drinking?Â
Your hair is a tangled mess, your mascara clumped around your eyes. Your lips are tattooed pink from all the wine you had been drinking. Wait, where did your wine glass go?Â
You turn around to find the bottle not glass you had brought in with you, fully spilt over the bathtub. Great.Â
At that moment, the door opens and Satoru Gojo climbs into the bathroom, nearly knocking you over. You lean over, your head hanging over the sink. Youâre going to wretch.Â
âOccupied, Gojo.â you groan.Â
He moves at the sight of you, plopping onto the floor, his head in between his knees. Youâre glad youâre not the only one who had too much to drink.Â
âStop calling me that L/N.â he slurs, basically slumping further on the floor.Â
You shake your head, confused by what the hell he was talking about. You just called him by his fucking name.Â
âNo. Thatâs my last name.âÂ
Fuck. Did you say that last part out loud?
You lift your head from the sink, moving to join him on the ground. The two of you sit back against the wall, cheeks pink and panting. You really did have too much to drink. Thatâs the last time you listen to Geto again.Â
âCall me by my first name.âÂ
âI donât even know you that well.âÂ
You try to lean your head against his shoulder, but miss entirely and end up falling into his lap.Â
âWhat the hell are you doing?âÂ
âGot tired of holding my head up. And you donât call me by my first name either.âÂ
You readjust, your head in his lap, his hands in your hair. If you were sober, you would tense at the contact - never getting this close to anyone, let alone Satoru Gojo. But you werenât sober. You leaned into the touch, staring up at his icy blue eyes. His cheeks are red, eyes dilated.Â
âYou know me. First name.â
âNo. What is your favorite book?
âSlaughterhouse Five.âÂ
âFavorite Taylor Swift song?âÂ
âYouâre ran through. Why do you, a man, know that song?â
âWhatâs your favorite color?âÂ
âThatâs stupid. Youâre just saying that because thatâs the color of your eyes.âÂ
âMy eyes are not light blue.âÂ
You sit up, adjusting yourself in his lap to look at his eyes. You place your hands on the sides of his cheeks, lifting his head to get a look at his eyes. He flutters his eyes open, staring into yours.Â
Since when was he soâŚpretty?Â
âPretty? Not gorgeous?âÂ
Shit. Why are you talking out loud? You wince, sticking your head into the crook of his neck out of embarrassment. He brings his arms around you, his hands slightly shaking against your back.Â
âI think youâre pretty too, Y/N.â
The air leaves the room. You freeze. Your hands are shaking, stuck around his neck. His hands were now firm, holding you steady in his lap. He looks into your eyes, his gaze suddenly piercing.Â
âYes, Satoru. I think youâre pretty.â you whisper, your voice drying in your throat.Â
Itâs his turn to freeze, the grip on your waist tightening even more. He shifts, his right hand moving to cradle the side of your face. Heâs so close, you swear you can feel his breathing against your lips, the smell of wine still hanging from his lips. His lips.Â
Instinctively, your eyes darting down to them, his lips tinted a similar shade of pink to yours. He leans forward, his lips pressing to yours.Â
It feels like a shock, electric, burning. Satoru Gojo is kissing you. Satoru Gojo is fucking kissing you. Why havenât you done this before? When can you do it again?Â
The door knocks, Shoko pounding against the door.Â
âY/N! Weâre fucking leaving, get out.âÂ
You and Satoru pull apart, still tangled in each other's arms. You meet his gaze, his face radiating pure warmth. My god, was he was the sun? Â
Why the hell did he have to kiss you like that? He reaches up, his thumb running across the length of your lip, still swollen from the place he had just kissed you. He just kissed you. Satoru Gojo just kissed you.Â
 âIâll leave you here to rot. Get out!âÂ
You speak up, realizing Shoko would break down the damn door if you didnât come out soon.Â
At the sound of his name, he leans forward, his lips pressing against yours again. He nearly knocks you over, leaning over you on the bathroom floor. This time, the kiss is more desperate, hungry. Like heâs wants something from you. You break apart, attempting to speak, but he keeps pulling you close again, smashing your lips together again.Â
âCome on, I really have to go.âÂ
He stops, his gaze peering into yours. He places two final kisses, one on the side of the neck and then the tip of your nose, before letting you go. The two of you stand up, wobbling from the alcohol still in your system. You balance each other, hands clasped together before you regain your balance.Â
You look up one last time, your hands resting against his biceps. Heâs still drunk, his head lazily leaning against yours. His blue eyes stare down at you, the makings of a smile on his face. You stand on the tips of your toes, your turn to press a kiss to his lips. He leans in, the kiss soft. He breaks, giving you the biggest smile you had seen on his face yet. You plant another one at the side of his cheek before leaving.Â
You canât look at Satoru anymore. Not Satoru, Gojo. You canât look at Gojo anymore.
The following morning, you woke up in Shokoâs bed, who had informed you Suguru had made brunch plans since everyone âowedâ him for trashing his room. She had already told you she had no intention of paying for any part of that breakfast, but instead was going to get free food. You didnât think Satoru, no Gojo, would show up so you accompanied her.Â
This is where you found yourself, unable to make eye contact with Gojo. One look at him and all you could think about was his lips on your neck, his fingers brushing across your lips, his hands in yours. Which was rather uncomfortable, because he was seated right across from you, knees knocking with yours right under the table.Â
Why the fuck did he have to be so god damn tall? You couldnât even brush past his knee without feeling your heart pounding in your chest. He was electric, a fire, burning you every second he sat across from you.Â
You feel your hands shaking at your sides, fighting the urge to reach over and touch the side of his face. Press kisses into the side of his neck. Run your fingers over his lips.Â
Suguru shakes his hand in front of your face, catching your attention.Â
âMy friend from the party last night! He was asking about you.âÂ
âThe one you talked to. For like the first two hours.âÂ
You pause, trying to wrack your memories of this guy. When did you talk to a guy? All you can remember is Satoru, his hands all over you, lips tangled with yours.Â
âWell, he wants to see you at the party next week. Asked for your number and everything.âÂ
Nanami leans over, joining the conversation.Â
âI took classes with him last semester. Heâs a nice guy.âÂ
âIâve heard heâs good in bed.âÂ
You turn your head, glaring at Shoko.Â
âDo you always have to be so vulgar?â you ask, pinching the bridge of your nose.Â
She narrows her eyes, a blank expression plastered on your face.Â
âItâs been a while for you. You should get some to release all that tension in your forehead. You look all hot and bothered.âÂ
You glare at her before prodding your fingers into her forehead. Suguru laughs, pulling his arm around your shoulder.Â
âWant to drive him real crazy? So bad youâll have to get some?âÂ
âWhat? Youâre worse than Shoko, Suguru.âÂ
You give him a confused look.Â
âItâs his favorite color. He wonât be able to resist.âÂ
You sit back, crossing your arms to look at Satoru. He doesnât say anything, only speaking up again when the topic changes to how much Suguru drank last night.Â
Who are you kidding? He was drunker than you. Maybe he doesnât even remember.Â
Saturday rolls around and youâve devised the perfect plan for the party. Youâre going to wear blue. Light blue.Â
If Satoru remembers, if he really likes you, itâll drive him crazy, per Suguruâs words. Granted, hinging an entire plan off of Suguruâs horny ramblings is a bit of a gamble, but youâre willing to roll the dice.Â
If he doesn't remember, you can flirt with the guy Suguru was mentioning, though you donât know his name or what he looks like. Youâll make it a point to have Shoko point him out, but youâre hoping it doesnât get that far in the first place. If things go your way, youâll be tangled in Satoruâs arms in a few hours.Â
You show up to the party two hours late, fretting over how your hair and dress looked for too long. You never really got overly ready for these parties, but here you were, hoping to impress stupid Satoru Gojo.  Â
You waltz into the kitchen, to find Shoko, Gojo, and Geto leaned over a chocolate cheesecake. You join them, Suguru grabbing your hand to spin you around as you stand next to him.
âDamn, Rookie! You clean up nice.âÂ
You feel your cheeks warm at his words, pushing him off you. Shoko winks at you, pressing a kiss to your cheek. You can smell the beer on her breath already, knowing it was her turn to be wasted this week.Â
âDid you wear a matching set?âÂ
âYou canât get some if your bra and panties donât match.âÂ
âStop asking me questions about my bra and panties. Drag me to the bathroom yourself if you want me that bad.âÂ
She sticks her tongue out at you, before turning to rummage through the kitchen with Geto. You and Satoru are left standing alone, their abandoned cheesecake next to you.Â
Heâs staring you down, the same look in his eyes from the bathroom. You feel your heart pound at the closeness between you, his lips only a few feet away. Moment of truth.Â
At that moment, you feel an arm sling around your waist, spinning you into someoneâs chest. Youâre facing a guy with blonde hair and hazel eyes, his strong smell overwhelming you.Â
âY/N! Iâve been waiting for you all night.âÂ
âUm. Do I know you?âÂ
âHaru. We talked at the party last week.âÂ
You feel the embarrassment rush to your cheeks. This was the guy you talked to last week, the one they were mentioning.Â
âRight! Give me a second, I just have to go to the bathroom.âÂ
Before he can respond, you scurry off to the bathroom, leaving Satoru and the guy standing there at the counter.Â
You close the door behind you, fumbling with the lock as you sit on the toilet seat. Youâre in over your head. Gojo doesnât even like you. He barely even gave you a second glance when you walked in.Â
You hear the door open, Gojo storming in. You stand up as he walks in, speechless at the sight of him. Heâs staring you down, the anger rising to his cheeks. He puts his hands on your shoulders, your heart already thumping at him touching you.Â
âWhy did you do it?âÂ
He laughs, pushing you against the wall and slotting his mouth against yours. Youâre caught off guard, the kiss the same as the one before. Aggressive, desperate, needy. He pulls off of you, panting.Â
âShut up. You know what youâre doing.âÂ
He presses his lips against yours again, deepening the kiss from before. His hands find their way to your sides, his warm hands tangled in yours. You pull back, your heart about to burst in your chest. You can feel the blood rushing to your head, moving so fast you were seconds away from seeing stars.Â
âWhat are you talking about?âÂ
âYou kissed me like that in the bathroom last week. All soft and sweet, whispering âBye Satoruâ in my ear. You see me the next day, barely even giving me a second glance, talking about getting some from another guy. And today, you show up in blue, but youâre here in the bathroom pressed up against me, whispering my name like you donât know what it does to me.âÂ
You freeze. Is this really happening? What does he mean?
âWhat does it do to you?â you whisper.Â
He lets you go, turning back to lean over the counter. Heâs pissed. Heâs actually pissed.Â
âYouâre impossible. You say my name and everything just stops.âÂ
You feel your cheeks warm at the confession, heart bursting with joy. You join him at the counter, pressing your pointer finger into the side of his arm to get his attention. He turns to look at you, towering over you.Â
âDonât start, Y/N.âÂ
You reach forward, resting your hands against your biceps. You push into the side of his arms, grounding yourself in the moment. Heâs really here. This is happening.Â
âYou like blue too. I bought this dress so you could take it off,â you whisper, looking up at him.Â
You feel him freeze against you, his turn to be shocked by the confession. After a few seconds, he reaches forward, pushing your hair behind your ears. He reaches down, lifting you to sit on the counter.
The two of you are the same height now, your arms secured around his neck. He leans forward, standing in between your spread legs. You suddenly feel embarrassed, burying your face into the side of his neck again.Â
âDid you just make a Taylor Swift reference?âÂ
You punch him in the stomach.Â
âYou, Satoru Gojo, are ran through. Why do you even know that?âÂ
âBecause I was enchanted to meet you?âÂ
You smack across the side of his face, glaring at him.Â
âStop mocking me. Youâre such a man whore.âÂ
âNo, really. I listened to her music after Saturday, because I know how much you love her.âÂ
âOh. I thought you just wanted to likeâŚdo what we did last week.âÂ
He stops, pressing his forehead against yours.Â
âNo, no. I want you to stay. I donât want you like a best friend, I want the whole damn thing.âÂ
You feel the smile spreading across your face, breaking apart to hold his face in your hands. He waits for a response, but youâre unsure what to say. How do you say the right thing?
âThatâs also a Taylor Swift song. Stay stay stay.âÂ
He smiles, cradling your face in his hands.Â
âYou are impossible.âÂ
He leans forward, pressing a warm kiss to your mouth. You can feel his heart thumping in his chest and youâre sure yours is beating at the same pace. He lets go, interlocking his fingers with yours before you join the party again.Â
âWho taught you how to kiss like that? Youâre so ran through, Y/N.âÂ
âYou donât want to know.âÂ
You see him pouting at you as he exits the door, him slinging his arm around your waist as he whines into your hair.
the satoru as taylor swift songs series masterlist