#samoas

it’s Girl Scout cookie season and my mom still thinks I’m a girl so I gotta sell these dang cookies again. If anybody is interested in buying, PLEASE DM ME!!!!!

the only thing is, you’ll have to ship the cookies because I promise none of yall live by me. The shipping fee is like 12 bucks and you’ve gotta buy 4 or more boxes.

I know it’s a fat chance anybody is gonna do that much, but it’s worth a shot because I HATE THESE DAMN COOKIES

(Yes I'm aware the Girl Scouts are an American thing. Indulge me.)

Rosekiller:

They aren't so much "selling" the cookies, as they are threatening people to buy them in support of their daughter "Or else".

Some Dude: "Nah, sorry man, but I gotta sell my own kid's cookies." Barty, pulling a knife out of fucking nowhere: "You'll buy the damn cookies or the only thing you'll be selling is your own severed hands."

Short, Sweet, and highly effective.

Wolfstar:

They have a whole plan. They used to just go to James first because this man will just buy every single one of those fucking cookies with no buyer's remorse, but Regulus has a firm ban on allowing any more than 3 boxes in the house at any given moment because they just had palets of the damned things sitting in their cupboard and now he gets physically ill at the very thought of anything other than thin mints.

So instead, Remus has a sale plan that he and Sirius created. It lays out the best locations, and with their encouragement, their daughter is very easily one of the best salespeople in the business.

Sounds normal right?

Wrong.

Because even a well-thought-out plan can be somewhat derailed based on Sirius's influence alone.

Let me set the scene: