#sad stuff

and i hate to be mean but sometimes when i see people (on twt especially) saying they're sad because their favourite fic is ai... im like... THAT'S your favourite fic? and you're an adult?

the teenagers i forgive. if i went and reread some of the stuff i liked as a teenager im sure id be embarrassed.

I like to read a sad book, or listen to a sad song and cry. I love the ache in my heart, yknow. I ruminate in the tightness of my throat, and I soak in my own tears. Maybe it’s because it reminds me that I, too, can feel the pain that others do. Because it’s a sign to myself that I am just as human as ever.

I will write this down before I forget.

I miss those times a lot, it’s been at least over a year now yet I still think of it.

Maybe because I’m back to having no one again.

Maybe because being alone with my thoughts leads to them wandering back to what I miss.

Friends.

Connections and inside jokes.

Celeste who I fell asleep on call with.

August who I called with on my birthday.

Lyla who was always active and a person you could have fin with no matter what.

Elle who understood and talked to me late at night.

And for Anna who I talked to the first time and got me to the point of meeting all these people.