#s174

The two last trolls alive, blood of rust and royalty, will make each other pay for the crimes against their race. Their payment will be mutually dealt in the currency of punishment and reward at once. The Condesce will be rewarded with the power and immortality her new service entails, and punished by the grueling slavery for which it is synonymous. And you, young lady, are to be punished by death at the hands of your replacement. And so too will this be your reward.

As a villain speech, this goes pretty damn hard.

There’s also a smug air of detached satisfaction to it. Scratch is the one who really deserves to pay. He’s the one who's been perpetrating crimes against their race since its inception. But he’s completely untouchable, so he’s free to sit back and narrate the fight he goaded them into.

It also illustrates another parallel between Scratch and Hussie. Technically, Hussie is the ultimate cause of all the suffering in this comic – but at the same time, he can’t be ‘held responsible’ for it. That wouldn’t make any sense.

Similarly, if Scratch was called out, he’d say that he’s not causing any suffering, he’s simply 'facilitating the inevitable'. It wouldn’t make any sense to blame him, would it? He's only the narrator of Homestuck's plot, after all.

...speak of the devil.

I've been watching Hussie's progress through the mansion, but he hasn't done anything noteworthy so far. He did refer to the Ancestor backstory as ‘fanfiction’ at one point – but for my own sanity, I’m going to assume that was just a tongue-in-cheek meta joke.

Perhaps you wish to know the history of the clock, and how I came to possess it? Yes, I can see the sparkle of curiosity in your eye. It's a marvelous tale, one almost as long as it is verbosely told. Where do I even begin…

Looks like Hussie’s about to attack Scratch before he can explain the clock’s backstory - which isn't quite as bad as if he'd interrupted the Ancestor lore, but I was still hoping to learn about the origin of this artifact. A God Tier resurrection monitor seems like it’d be useful to have around.

If I have to put up with one more smug meandering interlude in my own story I am going to crack your head open and serve you a heaping bowl full of your downy soft puppet ass. How do you like that for hospitality, Doc?

...I’m having a little trouble interpreting what’s happening here.

What does it mean for a story, when the metaphorical author is accosted by the actual author? Is this just Hussie’s way of signaling that the Scratch Narration Arc is over, and we’re going back to regular programming?

Furthermore, is this even a ‘real’ event? Is Scratch’s grand plan seriously being foiled by Hussie, and not the actual characters of Homestuck?

And what the fuck does Kid Handmaid think about all this?

Only dreams now.

Karkat, oh my god. Are you actually trying to talk him down?

Buddy, we are far, far past the point where this was a realistic option. Gamzee crossed the point of no return when he choked Equius to death with his own bowstrings - and whatever he did to Nepeta, I think we didn't see it for a reason.

You can't integrate this guy back into the group, and you don't really have the resources to keep him contained. Maybe in the long-term, there might be a way to undo the effects of his Cal-induced breakdown, and help him come down from whatever deranged mental state he's currently in - but right now? Forget about it.

If you let your guard down around Gamzee, he will kill you. Full stop.

...so why the hell am I actually seeing results?

This cannot be all it takes. If it was, then why couldn't Nepeta and Equius stop him from killing them?

Karkat already tried to calm Gamzee down. That was the first thing he did! And Gamzee completely ignored it!

Now that's more like what I was expecting. You can't just press the 'make Gamzee sane again' button. That wouldn't make any-

...what?

WHAT!?

Well you were completely on the money, Karkat. I, an idiot human, have absolutely no idea what just happened.

And yes, I know what a moirail is. I recognize that Karkat is taking on the even-tempered role here, endeavoring to calm down his violent partner, and that this is something completely normal for all trolls.

What I don't know is why all it took was a hug. I mean, when the narration explained that a moirail can ‘pacify’ you, I assumed that it would be a little more involved than this. I thought words would be exchanged, that the even-tempered partner would use their emotional intelligence to emphasize with their moirail's mental state, and gradually improve their temperament through communication and mutual understanding.

YOU WIELD THE ASPECT OF TIME, YET FAIL TO UNDERSTAND ITS RULES.

And that’s the long and short of it.

English simply can’t be stopped. He’s woven himself so tightly into events that he's essentially part of the thread. He can’t be stopped because he hasn’t been stopped, and the evidence for that fact is everywhere, all around us.

There’s no conventional way to ‘fight’ something like English. If you want to oppose him, you’ll need to attack something a lot more abstract than his mere physical body, which he's barely bound to in the first place. English is an event, not a person, and he's an event that's written in stone.

He hasn’t even been summoned yet, but he’s already here. I mean, why the hell wouldn't he be?

Who, though?

John’s putting the Scratch into motion. Dave and Rose have already left the session. The Sprites have been drawn to Skaia, and most of the Carapacians are dead or Exiled. There shouldn't be anyone left in the session who's even met Jade.

GG: its hard to make out GG: but GG: i think GG: it might be…

GG: shaving cream?

Ah, fuck.

Jegus!

The tadpole is a god, and can probably handle a little lava – but that’s not the actual problem here. This entire Land is about to be erased! And the one who was tasked to preserve it is-

We’ve got no time for the Quest Bed, even if Jadesprite was a valid target. Our timeline has officially entered the Rift; the Scratch is happening now.

There’s almost no one left to do anything for Jade – like I said, the Derse kids are already gone, and John is miles away on his own mission.

Our only hope, I think, is the Sprites.

There’s a nasty irony to this scene. This poor girl is making an escape attempt directly underneath the site of her future self’s death.

She’s going to fail. She’s already failed.

...that’s not our Vagabond.

This is him, isn't it? The universe is running out of time, so the true villain is starting to make himself known.

English is so damn IMPORTANT that even his Exile commands are supercharged.

I think this scene deserves its own score, to properly illustrate the feeling it evokes. In my head, I think this is what accompanies English's grand entrance into the story.

I guess he is just a limp lifeless puppet when I am around. Like a reverse Calvin and Hobbes kind of thing.

Ultimately, all of Homestuck’s characters are facets of Hussie - but as a narrator, Scratch is even more of a facet than the others. If Hussie and Scratch were to have a conversation, it’d be a little too obvious that we're just watching Hussie talk to Evil Hussie, and all of Scratch's menace would dissipate on the spot.

And the Knight of Blood so embraced the Bard of Rage, and in each other's arms they were aquiver. And with righteous pap and blessed shoosh he did quell his brother's fury. For the Knight looked upon his Bard all acting up and completely losing his shit and he did resolve to calmeth his juggalo ass right the fuck down. And so calmed down his juggalo ass was and would continueth to be for all time.

Alright, sure. But calm doesn’t necessarily mean safe.

Gamzee’s still a serial killer. He’s still done irreparable damage to multiple sessions, and he’s a dangerous zealot, determined to force the truth out of this comic. Things can’t just go back to normal, now that they know what he’s capable of. They’ll still have to contain him somehow – which is a pretty tall order, now that we know he has some sort of psionic ability. This is still bad.

If Hussie is to be believed, his blood frenzy is gone forever, which is good to know. But it bears repeating: calm does not mean safe.

Doc Scratch is calm.

Yeah, a recap would be a pretty tall order right now. We’ve got too many plates still spinning, and the pacing is too strong to be interrupted.

I can feel the pressure of Act 5’s finale, like a damn waiting to burst. We can’t hold it back now - so let us continue.

We've got the Genesis Tadpole, completed with unknown DNA.

We’ve got Jade, who’s made a heavy-handed deal with Echidna.

We’ve got Jack, destined to break free from the session with blood on his hands.

We’re on the edge of a cliff, here. I can taste it.

CG: THIS PRETTY MUCH HAS TO BE THE LAST CONVERSATION WE HAVE, RIGHT? CG: YOUR TIMELINE CUTS OUT COMPLETELY IN A MINUTE OR TWO BECAUSE OF THE SCRATCH. CG: WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT UP THERE? CG: ARE YOU HYPNOTIZED BY THE FLASHY SHIT, WHAT THE FUCK. CG: THAT'S BEEN GOING ON EVER SINCE JOHN STARTED SCRATCHING THAT BIG GODDAMN RECORD, AREN'T YOU ACCLIMATED TO IT BY NOW?

Skaia’s clouds show prophecies. Derse’s shadows hide whispers.

This isn’t supposed to hapen...

We’re finally back to Homestuck proper, then - and I assume that means the more meta aspects of the narrative are going back in their box.

I guess it's time to see exactly how Gamzee was 'dealt with'.

I'm a little nervous about this one, to be honest. It sure looked like Karkat was able to best Gamzee in combat, but he never actually confirmed that was what happened - and there are certainly other 'troll things' that might confuse John here. If they've started a kismesissitude instead, I am going to be pissed.

Karkat’s honestly a pretty good matchup for Gamzee right now. His own personal rage is a perfect antidote for Gamzee’s Aspect abilities, and could potentially drown them out entirely. I feel like he’s currently too pissed to be intimidated.

Kanaya’s good to have, too, since she's... possibly immortal now? She should at least be a lot harder to put down, now that she's a vampire.

This ain't no blackrom, then.

Thank you, Karkat, for confirming that my worst-case scenario will not come to pass.

Sorry, Terezi, but I’m not sure how useful your Seer powers will be.

If you're trying to analyze the consequences of someone's decisions, you need that person to be following some sort of internal logic. Gamzee, however, is following a puppet. I doubt even he knows what he's going to do next.

And, please, for the love of god, do not try to blackrom him.

Sollux might need to sit this one out. I’m pretty sure his psionics are still out of commission, and he's completely reliant on them in a fight. The guy never even bothered to assign his strife specibus.

22.4.2024 je numericno interesanten dan, kajne?