#run wild

anyway hi yes i am alive!! I have successfully moved to the other side of the world and i am finally over the horrific jetlag it gave me so it's time for me to get back to being completely insufferable about sa ye you're welcome

I’m going to go a little off topic now, but it’s still really important to me how Saye (at least as of now) structures Gu Fei’s main problem not as Gu Miao herself, because he doesn’t view her as a burden, but of the circumstance he is in. It may seem like a small distinction, but I think it’s important because it isn’t that Gu Miao is who is keeping him from Jiang Cheng and his own aspirations, but his mother, his financial situation, his abusive father in the past, his upbringing that all culminated such a way that only he has the sole responsibility to take care of Gu Miao. And not only is that unsustainable for him, but it’s unfair. And the narrative can say all of that without placing the blame on Gu Miao which is so important to me.

Idk I’m just getting very emotional with both Jiang Cheng and Gu Fei being so mutually proud and accepting of each other’s future direction. Gu Fei saying “you are the one thing I’m proud of,” to Jiang Cheng, sharing in the pride of seeing Jiang Cheng make it into his dream university program and implying that it is something he can be proud of as his boyfriend—it’s just very touching. I love that neither of their accomplishments are posed as being greater than or less than the other. Whenever I read saye, it’s like I want the book to prove to me that there’s a happy end out there even when it seems like life is taking you away from people you care about. Like them being endlessly proud of one another and at the same time having the fear that what they are proud of is what will take them away from one another, it’s just too real to me and it makes you want to believe in being idealistic.