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a term for any part that is missed, grieved, or was 'lost' to their system. this may have been through shattering, prolonged dormancy, fusion (particularly negative fusion), drastic fragmentation, or any other occurrence that the system views as loss.
this is one of the few terms that the headmate themselves cannot claim. rather, its intended use is to give those who loved them a term to refer to them by, memorializing their existence and showing that they were cherished by the rest of their system.
more personal info below the cut, surrounding what inspired us to make this.
#OHHHH THIS IS WHAT AMMIE WAS #man i wish she were around to see this
these tags were left under our house host term by @crys-ambivalenttowardrbs . it hit us hard. it made us happy to know that we'd been able to give a recognized name to something others experience, especially when the person in our own system, who coined it for themselves, struggled for so long to define their role in words.
"man, I wish she were around to see this."
we've echoed that sentiment so many times, about so many we've lost; it makes us emotional reading it over trying to write this. they would have loved this, if only they could see it. it's even harder now, because we lost the person who coined that role, split up into multiple for a lot of different reasons. though we love the newcomers dearly, there's still that sense of loss for the person they were.
everyone focuses so much on how, in the typical way, headmates can't die, so they skim past the fact that you can still lose them because it's 'not the same'. we've always hated that. loss is loss, no matter what way. sometimes you can get them back. sometimes you can't. it doesn't change the fact that it hurts when they're gone.
we wanted a way to let others know they're not alone in grieving. a way for those left to show that the ones they lost weren't just forgotten, they're memorialized, whatever that means to them. a way to commemorate the alters that didn't make it through to the other side.
this post is dedicated to ammie. it's dedicated to those in our partner system that we never got the privilege to meet before their collapse. it's dedicated to all the members of our system we've lost over the years, and to those we never got to meet properly before they slipped away. it's dedicated to every single part, alter, headmate, fragment, that every plural has lost in their journey.
we understand that holding on is hard. we know. but your system will love and cherish you, and what you did for them, long after you're gone.
could you possibly coin a term/make a flag for a system role that consists of absorbing other headmates, particularly dormant/dead/inactive ones?
Detritivore / Decomposer
a headmate whose role is to absorb dormant or otherwise inactive headmates .
coiners note : as soon as we saw this request we thought abt decomposers and their role in nature , hence the name and the colors on the flag being the colors of bugs and mushrooms . sorry if that’s Weird . prime example of the consequences of requesting from a nerd /silly
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An alter who feels uncomfortable fronting alone due to nervousness or something else of the sort. They typically aren't very social, and if they do front on their own, they do so when the physical body is in a place where there won't be any other people.
Labrador
An alter who cofronts with a cheetah to help them feel better.
A possible dynamic between them is, externally, the Labrador either speaking for the cheetah, or the cheetah speaking but their speech patterns being influenced to match the Lab's, and, internally, the cheetah retreating into their own mind.
These terms were created to describe my own experiences, with their names inspired by how cheetahs can be so nervous that they get emotional support dogs.
A headmate who knows when to withdraw, go mute, or disconnect to protect the system. (These headmates are often mute, or semi-verbal, otherwise often to be persice when choosing when to speak)
A system decorator is an alter who decorates and edits the systems pluralkit, simply plural, carrd, strawpage, rentry, etcetera. Alternatively, they may be called a system editor.
Requested by anon!
Endogenic/non-traumagenic/mixed origin systems are not permitted to use this term, nor are their supporters. This includes endo neutrals. This is a traumagenic system exclusive term.
