Top 10 best fops to goon to ✌️🩵🪶🌷🪞🪽🎀✨️
HEY FOPS!! HAPPY WIGFUCKER WEEKEND!!! As you most of you know, I have 6 missed the last 3 wigfucker weekends cause I uhhh……
I was gooning 🥺🥺 AND ALSO, THIS HEAT HAS BEEN BRUTAL BRO 😭 but it's okay because fops. I came back and didn't know that I was missed so much (AAWWWW U GUYYYSSS HGJDJJD) so I've decided that I will share this special treat that I cooked up for this wigfcuker weekend as both an apology for my absence AND ALSO SO YOU ALL HAVE NEW FOPPISH WANK MATERIAL FOR WIGFUCKER WEEKENDS TO COME!!!
ALRRIIIGGHT, SO, Today we're going to be talking about and going over my top 10 fops to jork ur shyt to! 🫶🫶 Now, these are just the ones that I personally love (and get off to the most :3) and decided that I should just share this for those who wanna see and if you guys have your own personal picks or other fops you enjoy, you can make your own future wank lists!! wigfucker would love to see them!
Also!!! Don't worry because I will try not to give any spoilers to their source materials so that you can watch them on your own time!! :D (well…except for #6 because im a chronic yapper who can't help myself BUT DONT WORRY BECAUSE I WILL PUT A WARNING BEFORE THE SPOILERS TEHHEE :333)
Anyways, you read the title. You know what ur in for. >:3
NOW LET'S ENTER THE MOLLY HOUSE🗣🗣🔥🔥🔥
Im gonna be ranking the fops from #10 to our #1 most goonable fop!
Warning: extremely excited, foppish horny yap city incoming
♡10. Prince George IV (Blackadder 1987)
Before he was Dr. House…
HE WAS THIS DUMBASS FOP 🎀✨️✨️
Prince George has been a fop that I've known about since childhood. Bro is the perfect beginner friendly foppish gooner bait and one of the most well-recognized and notable fops on this list!
His stupidity and ditzy dumb blonde fop energy is lowkey what makes him such peak goon material. We all know fops are not the brightest creatures, but they are certainly pretty! Some of my earliest foppish nutting sessions have come from this bimbo. He has one of the shiniest and most edible looking yummy wigs I have ever seen, and lowkey what gets me going the most here is his raspberry macaron color coded makeup. It's the classic dramatically blushed fop cheeks for me 🤤🤤 (in both senses👀🤑)
Another thing that I loved about this fop is THE ANKLES AND STOCKINGGSSS. The lowkey gooner baiting shots of this man's stockings is heavily apreciated 🙏🙏 now, I've made reference to this before and I lowkey just want to frot against his ankles while hes in his white stockings😵💫🤌 (and probably yapping about some bs)
If you've watched Blackadder season 3 in the past, you can definitely see what I'm talking about. ABSOLUTE WIGFUCKER APPROVED SAUCE👍👍✨️✨️
Also, he's just a really fun and silly fop, been around a while, and I heavily recommend for anyone who's a fopling or just getting into fopcore media and you want to jork it :33
♡9. Mr. Louis Talmann (The Draughtsman's Contract 1982)
THIS WOULDN'T BE A TOP TIER FOP GOONER LIST WITHOUT A KITTYFOP🗣🗣🔥🔥
Bro has been sitting at the back of my gooning gallery for about two years now. Sometimes I forget about him, but when I do come back.....bro provides🙏 some of the best nuts I have busted have been off this man and his dumbass kitty wig ears. :33
NOW, I HAVE A BACKROUND HISTORY WHEN IT COMES TO KITTYFOPS, OKAY. A HISTORY THAT HAS FUCKED MY DICK UP SOOO BAD IN THE PAST BRO IM NOT EVEN KIDDING 💀💀💀 It all started with a certain obscure opera I watched one time and that automatically became my gooning material (and it fucked me up for the next month omg 💀😭) but I feel like that needs a post of it's own...just know that kittyfops ruined my life (my dick) at one point 😢😢😔 BECAUSE I ORIGINALLY HAD A DIFFERENT FOP FOR THIS ONE BUT I DECIDED TO REPLACE HIM BECAUSE THE MEMORIES WERE TOO MUCH BRO 💔😭😭😫 (no joke, like I don't want any other wigfuckers who can't control themselves getting hurt😔 goon responsibly yall😢) OKAY OKAY, ILL STOP YAPPING ABOUT MY RUINED DICK FROM YEARS AGO HJHJVG
Okay, so, Mr. Talmann just has that very cranky, cocky, irritated, and annoyed vibe. Not on total brat levels but more like stubborn levels type of attitude that really goes hand in and with his level of goonability.🙏🙏🙏 ALSO ITS THE RUFFLES AND LAYERRSS FOR MEEEEEEEJXJCGN, like the way they just hang off along with his long curly wig hair just REALLYY scratches the right parts of my brain bro😵💫😵💫 BUT BROO, HAVE YALL SEEN THIS MAN'S BACKSIDE??!?? AND HIS ANKLESSSS??!??? (Yes, the ankles are a HUGE must for me. Especially in them white stockings🤌🤌and a key factor in fop goonability for me.)
I SWEEARR I HAD PAST PHOTOS FROM 2 YEARS AGO OF THIS MAN'S ASS AND BACKSIDES, BUT I CAN'T FIND THEM FOR THE LIFE OF MEE NOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRNNMMLCFXXFH JFNV CJGKGCCGK
Like- Yall gotta understand what I'm referring to here in order to get it🙏🙏 but like- ...DO YALL SEE THE VISION?!?? PLZZ TELL ME U SEE THE VISION😫😫
♡8. Archibald Cunningham (Rob Roy 1995)
This. Fucking. Menace.
Fops like this need to be publicly humiliated and have their souls broken. He wasn't forced to eat enough cement as a child.
OKAY, SO I ACTUALLY JUST TALKED ABOUT HIM RECENTLY WITH BECAUSE ANON SENT THIS TO THE WIGFUCKER CONFESSIONALS AND I WAS STOKED-
THAT MOMENT FURTHER LET ME KNOW THAT I MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE WITH THIS LIST YAYYAYA🙏🙏🙏
SO SHOUT OUT TO YOU, ANON HGJJJSBJSJ🤩🫶🫶
Bro, he's an EVIL FOP. AN EVIL CUNT FOP WHO IS BOTH INFURIATING BUT PEAK WANK MATERIAL 😫😫🔥🔥🔥
This man is so evil, but you'd all be lying I'd you said you haven't thought about gooning to bro. (And also who doesn't love some Tim Roth fops🤨🙏)
THIS MAN HAS BOTH THE MOST FUCKABLE AND PUNCHABLE FACE I'VE EVER FUCKING SEEN ON A FOP RRAAAAAAHHHHHGJVHJVVYVGJ (TBH I THINK ITS MAINLY THE SMUG ASS FUCKING FACES HE MAKES LMAAOO THIS FUCKING CUNT I NEED TO RUIN HIMMM) It's the CUNNTTTYYYY ASS OUTFITS FOR MEEHH😤😤🥱🤑🤑🤑 Like yeah bro is an eeeeevil little fuck BUT IF HE DIDN'T EAT DOWNN WITH EVERY OUTFIT IN THIS MOVIE 🙏🙏🙏 AND HIS DUMBASS 'NOBLEMAN' TALK HOLLYY SHIT BRO HJGJFJC I CANT, HE'S JUST SOOO PUNCHABLE IN EVERY WAY UHHHGHHGHHHH
Also, I think my favorite outfit is blonde wig Archie -w-
I also really like his pink outfit with that wig specifically :0 I call it his weed outfit, tho. (WAS THAT WEED HE HAD IN HIS HAND AT THE TIME?!??? IDK BRO, WEED FOPS STAND UP THO🙏🙏😮💨🍃🌿)
AAAAAHHHHH JUST CUT HIM RIGHT NEOWWWW AVGJJXKDHJSML UGGHHH IT SHOULD BE ME IN THIS PIC, NOT MACGREGOR HKBJXD FH GJCHK
This man NEEEEDS an ✨️exquisite✨️ taste of his own medicine👌
I would LOOOVVEEE to see him in the same position as MacGregor when he got tied up and beat up after getting captured by him, bro. SOOOO MUCH POTENTIAL FOR SOME FINEEE WHUMPERY RIGHT THERE🤤🤤🤑🙏🙏 Just straight up taunting and bullying this man to no end while giving him a few kicks to the stomach and a smack to the face every so often. Letting him know where he stands and that his power means nothing now. That's when when I start actually beating him and making him cry and wail. I tell him multiple times that I can stop if he wants (I'm lying) but he doesn't want to look weak and surrender so he continues to talk shit, so I beat him dome more :33 Soon it gets to a point where he's slowly giving up but too hard-headed to actually surrender so he's just sits there and takes it while making that stupid hurt face like "stop, please get away from me! 😣🥺" "Stop it, stop it, stop it! 🥺🥺" while bloodied and covered in bruises and tears. :3
(Maybe piss on him too just for funzies :33)
Watching his tough guy act just falls to pieces is priceless 🤌🤌🤌
But more importantly....
I NEEEEDD THIS MAN PREGNANT, SPECIFICALLY BREEDING HIM INTO HUMILITY AND SUBMISSION🙏🙏
Brooooo, do yall remember that episode of Girl From Nowhere where that dude who was getting a bunch of girls pregnant and then leaving them?? Remember him waking up vomiting and finding out his karma punishment waa him ending up pregnant and having to take care of the multiple kids he left and had to endure the same pain and burden he left all his 'girlfriends' with???? ...🫢😶
Yall know where I'm going with this right? 👀👀 (HOLY SHIT OMG FUTURE FANFIC IDEA!??! I NEED TO WRITE THISS😨✨️✨️)
UGHHH I WANNT TO SAY SOMETHING SOO BAD BUT AAHHHH I SAID NO SPOILERS FOR YALL😫
*also quick note: Argyll and Montrose have DEFINITELY fucked in the past. Will not elaborate any further, for that is a post for later date...
♡7. Robert Harley (The Favourite 2018)
LOOK AT THIS PATHETIC WET WORRM. You know for a FACT this man can only last 7 seconds...
You can make him do ANYTHING you want, and he'll most likely without a doubt do it with a few sad and pathetic whimpers coming out of his pretty little smudgy red lipstick-stained mouth
Harley is the perfect fop to throw spitballs at and make fun of while restlessly teasing him right before switching to giving him the most praise he's ever heard in his life, then he will start crying and cumming just because he feels so embarrassed and unworthy of being touched let alone loved by you. He's the typa guy to be super awkward yet anxious and probably asks for permission to do literally anything with you every 3 minutes just to be sure he's "doing it right"
*evil rubbing my hands together* soooooooooo much potential for some delicious fuckery right there....
He's the perfect wet paper towel of a man that you can just walk all over or spoil him till he's crying. (And it isn't hard to make bro cry) ALSO HE'S THE IDEAL EXAMPLE FOR A PEGGABLE FOP✨️
And his wig is top tier 👌👌👌IT NEEDS FUCKING. HE NEEDS FUCKING.
CAN YOU IMAGINE BRO DURING AFTERCARE?!?! 🤧🥹
Best believe he WILL be bawling like the sad little sensitive fop he is. (But we love him for it 🙏)
Wigfucker would will protect this bean and has also decided to spare him of the degeneracy that I subject other fops to (well.....almost all of it.) 🙂↕️🫶💕
♡6. Sir Chauncey Savage (Savage House 2026)
Wait-
...WAIT!!!
WAITT- DON'T GO!
DON'T LEAVE!!! PLZZZ, HOLD ON!! HEAR ME OUT FOR A MINUTE!!🙏🙏
HEAR ME OUT!!!😫
⚠️*OKAY MILD SPOILER WARNINGS BECAUSE I JUST CAN'T HELP MYSELFF I'M SORRY😭😭😭 maybe skip this one and move on until you see the movie and then you can come back to the gooning post 🤑👍⚠️
Okay, so this movie is..*fairly* new. This came out LITERALLY just last month of this year. I know, fopcore movie in the year of our lord 2026?? :0 New fopcore media that isn't from any year before 2012 or 2012 specifically???? :O wowieee
So I got to see it and OMFG.....I HAVE SOOOOO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT THIS MOVIE UGHHHFHGCG BUT I DON'T WANT TO GIVE AWAY TOO MANY* SPOILERS FOR THE PEEPS WHO WANNA SEE IT UGHFHB (maybe I'll make a future post about it👍) BUT BROOOOOOO, THIS WAS SUCH A FUN FUCKING MOVIE OMG. THIS WAS SOO FUN TO WATCH, I HAD SO MUCH FUN BROO (in more ways than one🥴) EHEHEHEHEE
IDK ABOUT YALL, BUT I ENJOYED THE FUCK OUTTA THIS FILM, ITS NEW, ITS DIFFERENT, AND SOO CHAOTIC OMG YIPPIEEEE I had the time of my life watching that shit ...but
...yall know what wigfucker REALLY pulled up for...YALL KNOW WHAT WE'RE ACTUALLY HERE FOR👀👀👀
And yall know EXACTLY why wigfucker went to the movies >:))))))
For Sir Chauncey, this unhinged diva. YES. THE FUCKING OLD MAN. LISTEN. LOOK. HEAR ME OUT. So if yall have been on the wigfucker blog for a while, you would also know that the wigfucker is also a proud old man fucker. And this fop has ALLL the "foppish old man" larping characteristics that get wigfucker going while also being one of those unhinged fop characters that I just have a guilty pleasure for...AND OHH BBG, DID YOU DESERVE SO MUCH BETTER😢😢😭😭😭
YALL DON'T UNDERSTANDDD, I REMEMBER THE VERY NIGHT OF THE DAY I FINISHED SEEING THIS MOVIE AND OMG I COULDN'T RESTRAIN MYSELF....I couldn't. I got home, made some tea, and was chilling for the night, and um...well....
Yall know where this is going, right?? :3
ITS JUST- UGHHHVHJXSK BRO THE WIG- THE WIG (yes, the one his former valet stole while fucking his wife💀)😭😭😭😭 THE WIGS THIS MAN WEARS THROUGHOUT THIS MOVIE JUST DOES THINGS TO ME😩😩😨🤧 LIKE I WANNA EAT THEM🫳 THE FLUFFINESS, THE CURLS, UUUGGGGHHHHH BRO THE TYPE OF SHIT I WOULD DO TO THIS OLD ASS MAN IN THESE WIGS WOULD GET ME PUT ON THE "NO WIG BUYER" LIST.
mmmm -w- wigfucking...🤤
I'M SOORRY BRO BUT I NEEED TO FUCK THIS OLD MAN (and his wig. The REAL star of the show😤) SOO HARD, LIKE I JUST NEED TO GIVE HIM THE GOOD, LOVELY FUCKING HE DESERVES AFTER ALL THAT BECAUSE HOLY-😭
THE WIIIGSSS UGGGHHHHNGGHJCBXBVCB THEY WERE SOOOO BIG AND FLUFFY AND PLEASING TO LOOK AT🤌🤌 AND THE MAKEUP???!!? BRO....CREAMING HJHKDKDKVFJNX😵💫😵💫😢The way he fucking moves with his long ass curly wig pulled to the back ughh AND HIS LIMPING TOO LIKE- LIKE OMFG LMAAOOO ur so fuckin old. Take off ur breeches. And his makeup goes so well with the wigs he wears and also the whole vibe of the film too.
We love an old gothy manic pixie dream fop🩶🥱😮💨 and bro is ✨️unhinged✨️ we love that in a fop. An old man fop at that. Ugghh him doing his makeup and wig with 1 arm was just- hnghhjsflskjv my dih was hard the whole time😵💫🤧🤤 I wana lick his face. Ugghh bbg, how beautiful you are, you didn't deserve any of that😔 🙏
I just have to keep harping on that fact. Idc, HE DESERVED SOO MUCH BETTER 😭😭😭NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUURRRRR😢😢😭😭😫💀 BUT AHHHH THIS MOVIE WAS FUN LMAOOO, I did genuinely love Sir Chauncey and Lady Savage together bro, they were lowkey so cute (and unhinged lol) :333 🥹 they made for eachother in so many wacky ways lmaoo
BUT BRO- THE GENUINE SHOCK I FELT WHEN THESE MFS DIDN'T SHOW UP TO THEIR DINNER PARTY BROO OMG I ACTUALLY THOUGHT HE WAS JUST GONNA SLAUGHTER EVERYONE IN THE HOUSE- 😭😭😭💀 Like ugghhh, and after all that bs too- 🤧 LMAOO THAT WAS SO MUCH, I FELT LIKE I WAS IN ON THIS WHOLE THING TOO💀 Like bro lost his valet that he genuinely cared about and considered a dear friend, bro messed up his arm, got it CUT OFF, and Lady Savage sold basically all her shit bro😢😢😢 AND THE FUCKING MAID- the way she weasels her way outta shit and just fled- Holy shit girl..💀 like-ughh I genuinely felt for this man....THE AMOUNT OF BS THIS MAN WENT THROUGH AND LOST JUST FOR SOME GOOD POINTS FROM THE DUKE AND DUCHESS WHO DIDNT EVEN BOTHER TO SHOW TF UP, IS JUST SOO DISSAPOINTING 😭😭💀
OOUUH NOOOOOOOO, IT DID NOT TAKE ALL THAT BBG, YOU WERE FINEE😫😭🤧 NOOO- 😢😫
BUT BRO, CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW THAT ONE SCENE WAS PLAYED OUT?!?! 👀 Like Omfg, they got it right. They got it sooooo right, holy shit, I hope everyone involved in making this scene got their asses eaten out🫶🫶 IDK ABOUT YALL, BUT I HEAVILY FW THAT SCENE🙏😭
The whole time, I was just sat there like "yes...YES. THIS is how you do it... This is exactly it. This is what overstimulation feels like." LIKE OMG, THEY DID SUCH A GOOD JOB WITH THAT😭😭 IT FELT SO REAL?!??? Like they PERFECTLY 🤌 captured that moment when suddenly everything feels wrong, you notice everything wrong with literally everything around you, your skin feels suffocating, your clothes feel irritating, the lights are too bright, all the people around you are suddenly annoying asf, and you can feel the tears filling your eyes as you're on the verge of a meltdown...
LIKE, HOLY SHIT- THEY FUCKING GOT IT RIGHT🙏🙏🙏OMG I FELT SO SEEN WITH THAT SHIT🥹🥹 AM I ALONE IN THIS???!?? DOES ANYONE ELSE GET THOSE MOMENTS OR AM I JUST- oh yeah this was about gooning...
soo peak....bro🤤 and overall really fun and chaotic movie :33 BUT GOD DAMN, DID THEIR NEIGHBORS SUCK💀💀💀lmaoo that was great and Sir Chauncey Savage has become a wigfucker certified favorite🤑 (but also omg, bbg deserved so much better, bro was way too hot, fly, and sexy for allat 😢😢)
also his backside, yall know the rules.
Uuggghhhnhn his wig tied in the back with a ribbon is peak goon fuel :3 UGGHHH I WANNA SHOVE MY FACE INTO IT HJHSJBH I JUST WANNA GRAB HIM FROM BEHIND AND START-
lemme stop myself...
Anyways, peak fopbaiting in 2026. I have gooned to Mr. Chauncey about 3 times on separate occasions of this past month and last month. (The night I got home from seeing it and rewatched it for extra research, that one time at the end of last month for science, and a few days after the 4th because i just had to make sure i actually liked it👍) It would've been 4 times but unfortunately you can't goon at the movies, my foplings😔🙏🎀
♡5. Conductor 71 (A Matter of Life and Death 1946)
Fop in heaven, dandy on earth. He's the best of both worlds :3
First off, just ....ugh.🤌 where do I even begin with this literal angel. Well, maybe with the fact that he's a LITERAL ANGEL EHEHEHEHE🤩🤑👀💙✨️🪽
The conductor is an angel who had lost his head in the French revolution and now works in heaven as the #71 conductor. (and sucks at his job, lmao, but once again, trying not to give away too much, but just know he's clumsy and goofy asf🙏 we love him for it tho ughh he's so sweet and humorous throughout the whole thing 🤧🤧🎀)
I LOVEE the idea of him stopping time literally just so we could fuck :33 He's the type to start off by making terrible puns and talk about how he considers himself to be a 'decent kisser' but will get shy and nervous when it comes time to actually do the kissing😔🤨 He also would be super excited with everything but would either end up doing an 'okay' job or just completely fucking it up. Bro has definitely used teeth when giving blowjobs because he thought it would ✨️add stimulation✨️ but it just ended up being the worst blowjob anyone has ever received 💀 I COULD DEFINITELY SEE THAT HAPPENING LMAOO so he'd just prefer being told what to do instead, as it would be easier for him 👍 (hey, the confidence was there, bbg😔🙏)
I have to say...I feel like he'd definitely be into cum eating. Like let's be so fr. He'd also be really into playful teasing. The wonderous wigfucker (aka me >:33) would volunteer to lick the thick drops of cum leaking from his bare ass and he'd tell me how unrefined I am for it but then not even a minute later he'd take a full load in his mouth and cutely lick the sticky white globs of cum off his hands while staring up at me with those adorable, desperate, fucking blue angel eyes hoping that I'd fuck the ever living life out of both his ass and his wig :3 💕💙🫶🫶
(Oh I'd fuck the hell outta that wig. Right in front of his face too.) ALSO IM JUST NOW NOTICING THIS BUT WHY DOES HIS SIDE CURLS LOOK SO TIGHT HERE?? THEY LOOK LIKE SWISS ROLLS I WANNA EAT THEMMM🤑🤑😵💫🍰
Can you imagine if bro had a visible halo? You best believe that shit is getting pulled to the back of his head aggressively every time he talks back or says some dumb shit<33 I'd tell him what a slutty, foppish, angel he is and taunt him about getting sent to hell for this. That is until he 'corrects' me and starts yapping again lmao.
Need him overstimulated to the point of shaking and spouting absolute fucking nonsense in French mixed with the cutest moaning and little squeals while he gets fucking railed and pounded repeatedly begging for more :333
UGGHHVG EHEHEHE Can you just picture the adorable sight of him with his face makeup ruined, messy white wig strands everywhere (wig damn near about to fall off🙏) and his natural curly dark hair out and on display as he's shaking and mumbling to himself? Peak. :3
And also, who doesn't want to fuck an angel fop?🥺💙
unaware queen🫶✨️☁️🪽
♡4. Willoughby Crescent (Dick Turpin 1979: S1E4)
THE CUTEST, WHIMSIEST, MOST ADORABLE MACARONI EVERRRRR💜🎀🥹🫶🫶
And most goonable too wut -w-
(Major yap city incoming)
Willoughby is the nephew of Sir John Glutton (he's hot too, but that's another post😵💫)and is one of the most memorable (and funniest) characters I've seen in this show/series. Actually, last time I watched this show, It was back in 2022, actually, and I can't remember where it was 😭😭 maybe if I find the episode, I'll let you guys know 😔🫶
Update: holy shit, I found it 🙏✨
I think what really does it for me is just how much personality his wig has....is that strange?? (Lmao) Like- I just feel like it has so much flavor to it and, of course, aesthetically pleasing to look at. It's just so unique :3 The curls are just🤌 uugggghhhhh, and I dont think I've ever seen a wig with bangs like that... it's so peak, but it really just makes him stand out more, and it also really compliments his color scheme. Sort of like a "milkshake blonde" typa color (idk help me out here😭😭 its lowkey kinda strawberry coded, too?😳) Idk bro, between bro's wig and his loud and flavorful personality, it just....does things to me..he just has so much to him. The way he carries himself is everything. It's his mixture of confidence and security while also having moments of anxiousness and scared bits, but I think that's what makes him so exciting too. UGHHH, THERES JUST SO MUCH, BUT IDEK HOW TO PUT IT INTO WORRDSSS
This cutie has it all!💕😫 The pretty pastel clothes, the makeup, one of the cutest most creative wigs I've seen that really fits his personality tbh, the fruity mannerisms, and the stereotypical fop voice/accent🤌🤌🤌 He really nails the "macaroni traveler" character in the best way possible. Ughhh he's SOOOO dramatic and fruity and foppish and adorable and just AAAAGJGKDJFBDGGXH. Such a cute and pretty name, too. It suits him well! :3
Like I already talked about why his wig just adds more to his expressive personality but I'm also not just gonna skip over those big pretty bows in both the back and front🤤🤤🤤 that shit adds VOLUME🤌🤌🤌 and ✨️fop logic✨️ and his pretty lace sleeves uugghh fuck...his makeup is the cherry on top here. That DOES SHIT TO ME HJJHVKGLJBB YALL HAVE YO UNDERSTAND🙏🙏🙏😫😭🤑🥴
Yall know I go wild for that cakey, powdered, full face fop makeup. The white powdery face, the satin pink cheeks, and red lips would be such a joy to ruin. Like I just need to fuck his pretty face. AND HIS ADORABLE LITTLE STAR SHAPED BEAUTY PATCH EHEHEHE
Bro: (˶˃ ∇ ˂⋆˶)🎀
not to mention the way he moves and just uugghhnhdbelsbsvs bro- his voice too....idk if yall know this about me (okay well...u probably do lol. Wigfucker lore🫢) but the "stereotypical fop" voice fucking gets me going fucking feral bro...like I actually was fucking bricked up when I heard his voice for the first time.. omg.... o_0 YALL DON'T UNDERSTANDAAAA 🙏🙏🙏LIKE HE SOUNDS EXACTLY HOW YOU THINK HE SOUNDS💀💀 That "default" fop voice that my mind immediately imitates when reading something with a fop in it or just coming across any kind of fop media. This is how the little fop narrating in my mind sounds👍
But of course not before I bursted out hysterically laughing my ass off with raging excitement when I first saw this because I was like "HOOLLLYYYYY SHIT- THIS IS GOLDENN WE NEED TO KEEP THIS GUY AROUND MORE OFTEN 🔥🔥🔥😧🤑🤌🤌 FUUHCC YUEEAAHHHH🤤🤤🤤" Like bro is so dramatic and hyperactive like yesss bbg. That's what we want in a fop🙏🙏
I feel like he's definitely a brat fop but not in the traditional sense...more in like the sense of he would totally be the type to argue with you and debate on why he is actually☝️🤓 a well behaved gentleman who doesn't deserve punishment🎀 and he's definitely a switch too. A pristine bisexual who takes little breaks every 4 minutes to drink water during sex because he's a ✨️fragile fop✨️ and probably screams and cries while laughing all at the same time as his eyes roll to the back of his head from the sweet pounding he's taking -w- (from the one and only wigfucker of course✨️✌️)
And he can sword fight! ;3
Willoughby is one of those characters that reminded me of why I always loved the "stereotypical fop" character trope so much💕💕
That's not a macaroni- thats a macaron 😮💨😮💨🎀
♡3. Monsieur Beaucaire (Monsieur Beaucaire 1924)
Just look at bro. Uuhhhhggggggnnnhhdhcfgv JUST LOOK AT BRO. bbg needs his ass eaten out like frrr (and I will glady volunteer✋️) HIS MAKEUP IS EVERYTHINGG AND HIS FUCKING LEGS IN THOSE STOCKINGGSSSHVJXXFXZFHXFJ- WAIT I HAVE PICS FOR THOSE TOO-
Of course, not gonna spoil anything for those who want to see the film of course, speaking of which, it's actually on the Internet Archive so if u like enjoy silent films (like wigfucker :3) its there👍✨️(it's nice wank material :3 ESPECIALLY if you're a slut for 18th century fop aesthetics like wigfucker -w-) BUT FOR THOSE WHO KNOWWW👀👀👀👀
He's just that classic, charismatic, soft and docile, sensitive white knight stereotypical prince charming type fop character who gets on his knees and kisses your hand lovingly while telling you about how he'd do ANYTHING for you.... and you all know what that means....(If you've seen a particular past post of mine...) rip to these types of fops who end up with wigfucker bc ur not ever seeing the sun again💕💕💕 :333
LOOK AT THIS BS🤧🤧 AND HIS BACKSIDE IS JUSTT- UGGH THE BACK OF HIS LEGS IN THOSE STOCKINGS ARE SOO GLOSSY AND PERFECT, PEAK FOP BAIT🗣🗣
Bro....this man needs to be domesticated. Like actually needs be fucking sat down, and put in the kitchen like IMMEDIATELY. He WILL be doing the cooking and the cleaning and the bending over. He's the typa fop to to put cute little notes and love letters written with a quill pen and kissed with his lipstick marks (a fop's signature✨️) he bows and kneels when I enter the room and says 'yes' to everything I tell him. The perfect type of fop to get wet when I praise him and tell him what a wonderful dream husband he is and then right after he starts happily crying and kissing my hand I tell him how cute he looks while crying and how even more adorable he'll look when I fuck him senseless :3333
His ass?? Getting eaten out.
That wig??? Getting fucked.
Them legs??? Getting jizzed on.
I feel like what's not talked about enough when it comes to vintage fops (1920s-early 1940s) is the level fuckability they possess AND THE AMOUNT OF WAVES AND CURLS IN THEIR WIGS😵💫😵💫 not complaining of course, as our top #1 fop has all of that going on but we'll get on him later...
These types of fops will always have their own little special area near and dear to my boners🫶🫶✨️ They have the perfect mixture of that 1920s and 30s elegance (especially in the makeup) while still keeping that 18th century fop charm and these two things mixed together never fails to give us the sluttiest, hottest, and most goon-worthy fops ever. THE WAY I HAVE JORKED IT AGRESSIVELY TO THIS MAN'S FOPPERY AND LEGS SPECIFICALLY- YALL DON'T KNOW😭😭😭
Okay, so...literally everyone in this film is hot, let's be real. (My other bbg's in this one too and he's still foppish as usual🥺🎀) but here we're gonna focus on our main MC here, the Beaucaire ✨️✨️✨️ (wigfucker approved) This man displays absolute foppery and sluttiness in the best way possible. (And aesthetically too ✨️) although the sluttiness outweighs everything else tbh💀💀💀 just look at this bro😭
LIKE- WHY TF IS BRO'S STOCKINGS OUTSIDE HIS BREECHES LIKE THAT?!?? WTF??? Like i get it's the style 😭 BUT IT'S SOOOOO SLUTTYY Im telling you, bro, these fops... they all know exactly what they're doing, and this happens in MULTIPLE instances and scenes bro AND IT'S NOT JUST HIM DOING IT💀💀 yeah. Everybody's a slut trying to entice the audience of wigfuckers that were watching back then🙏🙏
FUCKING IMMODEST, PROMISCUOUS SLUT KNEW EXACTLY WHAT HE WAS DOINGGG😠😤(they definitely did this on purpose)
They make him fuckable on purpose. They make him wear these tight pants, shiny stockings above is breeches, curly, wavy, wigs with long curly tails in the back, and slutty little outfits on purpose to create more propaganda and fop juice to grow the fop nation. (And it's working) this further encourages the idea that fops are just pretty male dolls to be used in fairytales and as decorations. The amount of slut-coded scenes we get of bro are crazy but I think one scene that comes to everyone's mind is this iconic shot right here:
Just admit it. You've gooned to this image AT LEAST once in your life. (They look like they wanna fuck eachother so hard lol. Like- why does this lowkey look like the setup of a gay porn video? You know what, we're moving on...)
♡2. The Emperor (Faerie Tale Theatre: The Emperor's New Clothes 1985)
The LITERAL HOLY GRAIL EMBODIMENT OF A FOP🙏 The very ESSENCE of a fop, absolute fucking cunt drama queen omg. The diva everr✨️🤌
Our main character here is the emperor who yearns for new clothes (cuz he don't got enough clearly😧🙄) and is sooo obsessed with himself and his appearance, which...I ....ya know. (Praying for bro not to get cursed with future body dysphoria 😢😢) BUT HE'S STILL A DIVAAA🙏🙏🗣🗣🔥💐🪞🎀
I HAVE TO say the quiet part outloud okay, wigfucker speaks for ALL of us (those who've seen it lol. Also I didn't realize that there's actually a lot of episodes of fairytale theatre on yt and its peak, so u can watch it there lmao 🍓🫶💕) when I say that THIS WHOLE FILM WAS NOTHING BUT JUST STRAIGHT UP GOONER BAIT BRO😧😧🥴🤑🫢 well...okay, maybe not for the normal people who've seen it but ...I'M NOT GONNA BE NORMAL ABOUT THIS, IT HAAASSS TO BE TALKED ABOUT🙏🙏
Tell me WHHYYY we get so many DELIGHTFULLLL shots of both the emperor's backside AND ankles? I'm FULLY convinced that was absolutely on purpose bro...cuz ain't no way-🙏 The way I was going CRAZZYY for the MULTIPLE scenes in which this man WILLINGLY gets on his knees with his fucking ass arched up (WITH THESE FAT FUCKING RIBBONS IN THE BACK MIND YOU, SO YOU KNOW I WAS GOING WILD) and his ankles with white stockings and classic red-heeled shoes on display.....like bro...😦 I genuinely could not believe what I was seeing. The whole time, I just sat there staring, dick in hand, like "UMMMMM...WHORE!!??!🫵⁉️" and watching the scenes where the larper tailors measure and dress this man was a delight🤌 why'd they have to put so much emphasis on his ass, omg??😭 (not complaining ofc :3) AND ALSO WE GET TO SEE BBG WITH HIS CLOTHES OFF YIPPIEEE!!!🎀🥹🥹😍😍😋😍🥰💕💜🥰🩷🫶🥰🥰🤩💖💕💖🎀🥰🥰🥰🤩💐🤩🎀 *oh sorry- I meant his with his nEw cLoThEs on. 😐...
I've seen a lot of fops in my time... but absolutely NONE come close to the level SLUTTY FOPPERY and ABSOLUTE CUNT🤌✨️ that the emperor possesses. I wish I could rewatch this for the first time again bro, I'll never forget the ...uhhh....let's call it ✨️re-awakening✨️ I had when I first watched this and thought to my self "yeh..............that's a fop." Pretty sure I was on the verge of splooging everywhere upon hearing and seeing him for the first time but BROOOOO, IT WASN'T EVEN JUST THE PURE FOP LOOK OF BRO, IT WAS HIS WHOLE THING HE HAD GOING ON😫🤌🤌 The fucking fluttering, the strutting, the amount of fucking SLUT BEHAVIOR that went on throughout this film was....concerning(??) but HEAVILY appreciated🤩😋🤑😩👏👏👏
Like bro- the look of hidden disappointment on this man's face when he saw his "new clothes" for the first time had me GIGGLING LMAOO💀 and it would make you think that he'd be rational and decide it's time to go back to the drawing board and rethink our decisions right? RIGHT??? No. Instead, he decides to make Bo and Morty (the "tailors" lol, I love these two goobers sm🫶) HIS FUCKING ROYAL FABRIC WORKERS BRO 😭😭😭😭 JUST SOOO DELUSIONAL AND NO LESSONS LEARNED WHATSOEVER 😫🙏🙏 AND ALSO- how does he proceed to do this??? By cutely taking the tassels of his night hat and brushing them across their faces with the most satisfied smile ever like he isn't getting absolutely played. Then proceeds to take his happy ass to the door in COMPLETE DENIAL jumping for joy 💀 LIKE- I CAN'T WITH THIS FUCKING BIMBO FOP BRO BUT HE'S STILL SO DIVA CODED 😭😭🫶💕 (his makeup is soo pretty in this scene tho🥺) like it's okay, bbg 😔 you can admit you were wrong....it's time to stop the madness (spoiler alert: it doesn't stop. It's ✨️fop logic.✨️ slutty fop logic.🙏)
okay but the emperor's assistants were lowkey some sluts too...🫢 Like the full on glaze and ass-kissery that these two put on this man's plate was through the roof. (Okay, well, his financial advisor wasn't that bad. He was still more vocally critical of him and looked visually annoyed with him at times, but the prime minister was just full on glaze. 💀 Like he was really rooting for bro😢) and I just know for a FACT that the emperor and his prime minister have DEFINITELY fucked in the past. Look, for those of you who've seen it, YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT💀👀😶
OKAY, OKAY, LMAAOOO setting all the freaked out fopbait aside, I swear it's actually not that crazy and we're all just massive gooners who don't know how to act around men in wigs, makeup, and historical costume😭🙏 (well...for the normal people here who are reading this post for giggles and funzies who aren't...ya know... massive gooners and want to watch it, I promise it's actually a really fun and cute movie 🥹🥹💕)
UGGGGGHHHH JUST LOOK AT THIS FUCKING SLUT ON HIS KNEES JUST DESPERATE FOR HIS "NEW CLOTHES" (that don't exist btw :0) so delusional and just REFUSES to accept reality.💀 But as for most fops, that's just normal fop neurons working👍 Also giving this film bonus points for the generous amount of backside views/ass shots we get of this man and his outfits🤌🤌 absolute ✨️gooner bait✨️ ...I mean- ✨️cinema✨️
(also gotta love prime minister with his pussy facing the world. Hell yeah, get it bbg🤧🫶)
LOOK AT THESE FUCKING SLUT WHORES OMFG
Such icons 🫶😮💨🤤🎀
♡1. Duc d'Orléans (Marie Antoinette 1938) *creams*
He'd look so perfect with cum and spit on his face :3
THIS MAN IS A DECEIVER, A LARPER, A LIAR, A CHEAT, A WHORE, AND A TOTAL FUCKING SNAKE WHO WILL STEP ON ANYONE HE SEES AS AN OBSTACLE IN HIS WAY AND WILL ABSOLUTELY THROW YOU UNDER THE BUS IF IT EVER CAME DOWN THAT🙏🙏
BUT GAAADDYYAUUMM BBG 🗣🗣🔥🔥💞😫🤧🎀💕🩵✨️✋️😩💞💗💜💓🤑🤑🔥🔥💖 HJBSGKBLHJBAHJSKS
OUR TOP #1 FOP HERE, HAS THE HIGHEST LEVEL OF FUCKABILITY THAT OTHER FOPS WISSHHH THEY COULD POSSESS 🙏🙏🙏
Ughhhh just another example of the absolute PEAKERY that these 1920s-early 1940s fops were on. We talked about this back with Monsieur Beaucaire but bro here just takes cake...🤧🤌🤌🤌✨️ (wish he'd take my cake... 😔😢)
LIKE- UUUGHHGDJVNXBV THE HAIIRRR- THE HAIR BROO THE HAIUURR, THE GLOSSY HEART SHAPED LIPS, THE BEAUTY MARKS, THE EYE MAKEUP, THE FUCKASS DRAWN-ON 1930S STYLE EYEBROWS,
THOSE LASHHESSSSS??!!???🤌🤌🤌
Those lashes and curls, holy fuck, I need to fuck his his pretty doll face😶I actually need to fuck his face. NO- BUT LIKE CAN WE TALK ABOUT IT?!?? No joke actually, if you were to splash water on this man's face, his entire fucking face would just fall the fuck off💀 LIKE NOT ONLY IS HIS PERSONALITY FAKE AS FUCK BUT SO IS HIS FACE✋️HIS WHOLE APPEARANCE ACTUALLY- ughh bro- my head...my head hurts..
Ughh his fake ass doll face is perfect because you could just jizz on him and he couldn't even really make any real facial expressions besides his signature bitch stare and maybe flutter his lashes a bit BECAUSE HE CAN'T MOVE HIS FUCKING EYEBROWS. It's perfect. Just absolutely perfect. If he cries, he'd look just like this. The same. I need to RUINN THAT DAMN WIGGG THOO. His crown of pincurls are literally just BEGGINGG FOR SOME WIGFUCKIN
He looks like a literal fop doll.
Bro has one of the most ✨️mAjEsTiC✨️ wigs I have ever seen. The more styled an high effort it is, the better it's going to be to ruin. Bro wears multiple wigs that have sooo much fuckability and (my faves including his crown of pincurls, and his cute rolled up curls with his long ass uncurled hair in the back lmaoo) these are some of the most creative, goon-worthy wigs I've ever seen.
I need to fuck this fop like violently. 😢😢 He's the perfect type of fop that you could slap around and pull on just to fuck with him. I love his heavy fake ass energy slutty makeup. I want to slap him, fuck him, and even beat him up tbh. He's lowkey the perfect trad fop. I want to see his mascara running down his pretty face while crying, covered in my spit. I wanna slap the shit outta him, make him cry, call him names, and make fun of him for being an evil fop :3333
UGGHHH, HIS WIGS ARE PEAK😫🤑🙏🙏✨️ I remember jorkin' it to this bbg for the first time, and I have to put him as our top #1 fop because the wank sessions I've had with this fop has been the most orgasmic, intense, and most fulfilling yet🙏🙏🙏 I have jorked it to bro so many times that I can't really give yall a definite number but to give you a good idea of my analytics I can say the amount of nuts busted this month from this fop specifically have been about 3 but maybe three in a half because I was damn near leaking making this post but I'm sure that doesn't count as it isn't the full nut, but you get it👍👍
OKAY, QUICK ✨️FOP MATH✨️
So, between the 3 times this month and the other times throughout last month and the month before (which was I remember was specifically 2) because the most I gooned to him was in June and it was like few times the first week, the 2 times in that one day I had because my internet went out and the most I had was my mind and the pics in my camera roll lol. So, if the fop math is matching, I can say that is more nuts busted to this fop specifically than the number of times I've known other fops and gooned to them ✨️✨️💕🩵🌷🤧👀👌
Look at his back side bro🙏🙏😔🤑 (AND HIS BIG ASS BOW IN THE BACK🤌) fops with big ass bows in the back>>>>>>>>>>
You just KNOW this man probably kisses men in his spare time. He has definitely gotten railed by multiple guys in the past carousel style. This man is ✨️experienced✨️ and you know that he is because how else would bro be in the position he's in?? How else would he be able to get away with the shit he does?? He absolutely has sucked some people off to get where he is and has absolutely dabbled in some bribery, fuckery, and some evasion from time to time. Lying is his specialty. He will be the friendliest fop you've ever met just to stab you in the back the next and then maybe fuck you in the ass too just be because he thinks he's that powerful😒🙄 ...whore.
This man belongs in the fucking moly house bruh. Full on. Just full-on fucking slut. This man does nothing but be bisexual, sip hot tea and lie, and parades himself around like the fucking whoreish slut he is. He needs to get passed around and ran through.
Look at him…looking down on those... ✨️𝓹𝓮𝓪𝓼𝓪𝓷𝓽𝓼✨️
HJGSHKC LOOK AT THIS FUCKING LARPER BRO💀💀💀
REVOLUTIONARIE MY FUCKING ASSS BRO 😭🙏 crazy switchup isn't it? His fake ass…lmao (and he's still out here with the fucking drawn-on pencil brows I can't-💀)
This man is an absolute fucking snake BUT CAN WE REALLY BLAME HIM THO?!??😭😭😭 Like can we really blame him?? Like, I have to give it to bro, he lasted a good long while throughout this movie and got away with SOOO MUCH SHIT (ughgjbn once again, not gonna say much cuz I don't wanna spoil anything for those who want to see it, but yall get it😮💨) like is he a scheming, scamming, slutty, cunty, evil fop? Yeah. But is he smart as fuck?? Absolutely. Like I have to give credit where it's due😔👏👏👏
AAAHHHHH LOOK AT HIS SMILLEEE 😭😭💕
My adorable little evil fucking cumslut fop🥹🎀
OKAY, WE'VE MADE IT TO THE END!! YIPPIEE!! Omg, ur still here?? 😳🤩(I think I got a bit carried away towards these last few fops💀) Sorry for the extra yappage, BUT AAAAHHH HAPPY WIGFUCKER WEEKEND GUYSS EHEHEHE🫶🫶🫶💕🎀💐🩵💋🌷💖🍓🪽🪶🕯👑🍰✨️
NOW YOU ALL HAVE NEW FOPS TO GOON TO!! YAYAYAYAY!!!🤩🤑🥰 (and new fopslop to watch!! :DD)
Once again, apologies for my time gone and missed wigfucker weekends! I was gooning too hard bruh😔🙏
Hopefully, this makes up for my tardiness and maybe gives you an insight into what goonery I've been indulging in these past 3 weeks. I've been gone🙂↕️🎀
ILLYYAAAA MY LITTLE FOPLINGSSS!!!! MWUUAAHH!! MUUAAHHH!! :3💕💖
