@youcantrewind reminded me that I had not yet posted my fic line for the week, so here it is:
The force with which Riyola slammed her hands on the table propelled her to her feet, “Do you think endangering passengers is something I enjoy doing? I was doing what I had to, and so was Lenka.”
anyway I haven’t written anything new on this fic since starting this challenge so I may have screwed myself with this one—
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The tale of “New Beginnings” 2.0 (And my grand plan for reviving this blog)
Back in 2022/2023, I put out the first two chapters of a starcruiser fic called New Beginnings. It was my first time ever attempting a multi-chapter fic. (Okay second but I was 12 the first time so that doesn’t count)
Anyway. It scared the hell out of me. And because I was scared, I didn’t do it properly. Here’s what I mean:
Those who know me know that I’ve always been more comfortable writing scripts than writing prose. But the reality is those are two very, very different animals and need to be treated as such. When I first published New Beginnings, I wrote it like a script - and I even say so in the fic description. I think my exact words were “don’t take it too seriously” which was my way of saying “I’m intentionally not trying.” There was a little bit of spite in there - I was writing so much for my classes that I wanted something low pressure, and something where I was allowed to not care too much if it was bad. But in freeing myself, I actually constrained myself.
There was a story below the surface of New Beginnings, the one that I actually wanted to tell, but doing that meant approaching the piece in a completely different way, a way that I honestly did not think I could do. So I stopped. I never made it past chapter 2.
Earlier this year, I decided to give it another try. And this time I was going to put in actual effort to make this the story I wanted to tell.
I know it sounds like I’m being very hard on myself, and I don’t mean any of what I’m saying to be directed towards anyone but me. What I’m trying to get at here is that I sometimes need to remind myself to recognize when I’m standing in my own way. That yes, trying is scary, but half-assing it is even worse. And I know I’m talking about voluntary, fun work here, but it’s still good practice regardless.
So. All that being said, here’s the plan for keeping myself accountable and not letting this fic fall away again:
Every week, just once a week, I’m challenging myself to post something from the fic in progress. A line. Two lines. A paragraph if I’m feeling that spicy. But I have to post something. If I don’t, I give you, yes, you, permission to poke me, gently remind me, lightheartedly make fun of me, meme me, get my attention in any way you see fit. If I’m gonna get excited about this fic again, I think it’ll help if I bring you along with me.
So to start us off, here’s my first excerpt from “New Beginnings” 2.0 (now retitled “Our Lady H”)
“Oh, yes. As far as Chandrila Star Lines is concerned, we are on strike two.”
Lenka mulled over her Captain’s words, “and what happens if we reach strike three?”
Riyola took both of Lenka’s hands, raising them up to chest level and squeezing them tight, “We consider piracy.”
Always Darkest Before The Dawn - Lenka Mok/Riyola Keevan
A/N: Day 27 aka 7 for @domaystic
“Are we a cliche?”
The words are a whisper, Lenka’s eyes closing even as Riyola’s soft fingers tuck under her chin, her eyes opening at the feeling of Riyola’s lips at her ear. The other woman’s voice is low, sweetly husky.
“Maybe we are... but why does that matter, what we have is real...”
Lenka had spent so long wondering how to handle what she was feeling, now she knew. She had to trust Riyola, trust her heart to know the truth. She’s safe here, wanted and loved and chosen. Cliches were cliche for a reason. She would be alright.
“Have you got the numbers?”
Riyola’s question is answered with a laugh and Lenka handing her the notes she’s taken. The ship, their own Starcruiser, is empty now, the guests and clients out exploring Batuu, but she knows they have at the least broken even.
“How did you know...”
“You ask every trip Captain...”
Lenka’s voice is softly teasing, her smile affectionate. She’s used to this by now, they’ve been sharing the work of keeping the ship running flawlessly between them. She knows that most people question which of them made the first move but the truth is both of them chose one another, working together whilst building a relationship didn’t always work but with Riyola, for once, it had worked out, a fact that made Lenka all the more grateful to have found a domestic life she can enjoy whilst she works.
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The chance to take a poll on if they helped the resistance or not was one Riyola took carefully. Sammie had been on his way out the room before she made the choice, even as she knew the man would want to help. Gaya and Ouannii had been willing to help her and then came Lenka.
Lenka who looked at her in silence for a long time, her voice soft when she finally spoke. The room falls quiet as she does, everyone aware hers is the choice that will make or break the option to help.
“Chewie is your dearest friend, an old friend.... of course we have to help.”
Riyola’s smile is reward enough and Lenka waits for the others to leave before she moves to squeeze Riyola’s shoulder gently.
“You can count on me... Captain.”
How Will She Know? - Lenka Mok/Riyola Keevan, Gaya/Ouannii
A/N: Day 22 aka 2 for @domaystic
“Just tell her...”
Gaya’s voice is soft even as she watches Lenka pace. She knows, deep down, that this won’t go well if Lenka doesn’t calm herself. Ouannii nods.
“Mee tinka mee love u...”
Ouannii’s advice draws a frustrated noise from Lenka.
“I’ve tried that.... I just... I can’t. She’s so... I couldn’t.”
Gaya smiles slightly.
“Do you need a tutorial?”
Her voice is light but she can see how much Lenka is shaking even as she moves to take her hands.
“Just tell her, Lenka... she won’t push you away.”
“How do you know?”
“Because I told her.”
Riyola’s voice draws a soft noise of fear from Lenka and Riyola half-rolls her eyes, moving to take Lenka’s hand, pulling her away to talk, her voice soft.
“Next time, don’t go looking for a tutorial Lenka, just tell me what you’ve been thinking or feeling. You know I care... deeply... about you.”
A pause, then, finally, after a muttered curse, Riyola speaks softly.
“I love you, Lenka. There’s a reason I’ve never let you leave me.”
“When is he planning to leave?”
Lenka Mok’s voice breaks her thoughts and Riyola Keevan sighs as she shrugs.
“Who knows. He hasn’t exactly learnt from being bested....”
“Well, there is the old proverb...”
Lenka’s about to share the proverb when Riyola hushes her, glancing up as the man walks past.
“Don’t. Not here.”
It’s later, far later, that she hears the proverb, the two women sat alone after dinner, Riyola having made excuses to pull Lenka into her office to ‘work’. There’s a quiet peace in the way Lenka moves closer as she shares the proverb, the two soaking up one another’s company in private, aware they could never be so open in public.