Did u guys know there are DL men who pretend to be openly gay to flirt with gay boys and when itās time to be real about it they vanishā¦ im sorry itās just I canāt wrap my head around it I never thought that was a thing bc if u wanna keep people from knowing you should tell the gay boys day 1 so ur cover isnāt blown. but some of them like the vulnerability of someone who thinks theyāll be claimed they need to feast on a certain kind of admiration and later despair. Bc if I knew the truth Iād be way less open. so they have to role play for some time and take the risk. It actually even took me a while to realize thatās why things fell apart bc I still believed the lie and tried to put the pieces together and nothing fit until I realized ohhh heās hiding it. It made everything so dull and depressing. And Iām always a closet case warrior bc I truly feel bad for people that live like that every closeted bi guy I know is terrorized with self loathing. But when someone tells you theyāve always been a secret and you tell them hell no I donāt do secrets Iāll show you off proudly! With no intention toā¦. And now the first person whoās ever offered that to me actually wanted to sweep me under the rug like thatās a level of betrayal I never thought existed like who does thatā¦ and it would be okay if I was just talked to. I can forgive almost anything really and Iāve been trying to have empathy but the truth is that something very sick and twisted and cowardly was done to me.
