RTE VN UPDATE: SHINY RED PEN FOR PUBLIC REVIEWS!!!
So the game has had its final major update for functionality and is available in its best light for all to see. And I know a lot of the people out there are super hesitant to deviate from their normal content for certain things like this, even in the dark, club-lit corner of the internet that Tumblr is...
...so I am here to offer you a shiny red pen for the request I am about to make: if you have the time and interest, I humbly ask that if you play, you also publish a review of the Eternal Frenemies: Return to Eternity Visual Novel!
Yep, you heard me: PUBLISH - post, link, tags, the works!
Read more below for clarification on the shiny red pen you get to do this with:
Alright, so you clicked, let's get into it:
I am well aware of the ten-percent rule (which is at its worst for small creators like myself), so statistically I can't expect more than a few people to ever take this seriously without some additional influence. I would hope that there are aspects of the game that people would praise, but it's more realistic to expect a good amount of players to care more about critiquing the game than the game itself due to its niche nature and intentional imperfections, so I am now here to offer you a chance to do JUST THAT- no holds barred, brutally honest and as cutting as you wanna be for whatever reason.
I just have one request: PUBLICIZE IT, leave my DMs alone.
You can spend the whole time picking it apart to a science, trashing everything, highlighting all the parts that are "wrong", "not good enough", "missing", blah blah blah - I no longer care, whatever makes it fun for you. As harsh as it may be, I trust you will have good reason to your criticisms, from studying if not participating in the professional capacity yourself.
And as harsh as it may be, any acknowledgement for my work spoken aloud for all to see is better than trying to keep it under wraps - I greatly appreciate the respect this carries in certain contexts (some creators are justified in asking to keep criticism private for whatever reason), but it has always been quite the slap in the face for me, and I would like to put a stop to it by asking for review in this way. I would rather you hate my stuff out loud than like it secretly.
I will also admit that because of the ten-percent rule, this is basically a necessary measure in order to extend the reach of my game to the eyes and ears around the world who might enjoy it. I am an advocate against unprompted criticism - that is, in response to works shared as expression instead of explicitly looking for feedback - but criticism is a necessary tool (and this is prompted as a MF). It helps artists get to where they want to be, and further entices discussion of learning more as a whole.
I am an artist that is finally satisfied with my art style and storytelling after about a decade of refining, so I am not explicitly aiming to get any closer to a professional level. Because of their unprofessional nature, I do not expect anyone to have anything positive to say. I expect people, if given the chance, to only highlight problems and improvements from a professional standpoint "just in case I change my mind and want to sell" or as if the game has no good points. Doing this DOES NOT make you a bad person, just one that pays attention, and attention is this game's best ally right now.
And I am not strong, so negative remarks can and do hurt for a while, but I take that risk and just share my work anyway because positive feedback and just....people making it know that they like what I create makes me feel that good. So I am not afraid. If all you have are critiques and you can't find anything good, that is valid and fine, mark it ALLLLLL the way up - everyone has a different opinion, and I wanna see all of the ones geared toward my work (publicly, of course)!
That being said, I feel that critiques carry more weight as research is done not only around the the tools used to make it but also around the game's available and unlockable content...so, ALL SPOILERS ARE ALLOWED, feel free to show any screenshot of anything you find worth noting! I look forward to reading every last review, so be sure to tag me!
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YOOO Iâm excited! I wanna respect your time and whatnot, but Iâm curious about the app called forrest basically you grow trees by focusing for set amounts of time. never tried it but the app store keeps recommending it to me. from a cursory look at the reviews, some people said it helps with phone overuse (hooray??) it is four dollars, not sure that you want to start with that. anyways thanks for your consideration, hope this blog goes super well :DD
This is actually an app I paid for the premium version of years ago, by chance! So I can give it a pretty complete shake. Here's the review.
Forest: Phone usage control
Overall rating: Certified, with stipulations. Here's the tl;dr
App includes a disincentive for failure (tree death), so if you're sensitive to even mildly feeling like you've fucked up, this might not be your bag
Low on novelty, so if you need a variety of goals to pursue quickly, this might not be your bag (other plant unlocks take a lot of time, forest grows one 25 minute increment at a time)
Achievements and events are a big plus, with several relatively easy achievements to keep you going.
No Dark Mode
supports a charity so that's pretty cool
Diamonds shop even after a 1 time purchase: go no further if you are susceptible to impulse purchases, I respect them keeping the lights on with optional bonus content, but it can be easy to chase the Purchase Dopamine and we need to say No Thank You
Red Flags: None, this app has been going steady for a few years and for seemingly pretty good reason. I didn't find any red flags with the charity it supports either. It's not on a subscription model, and nothing in it seems to be ridiculously priced.
Dopamine hits: Okay so the main drive for using this app is growing the big old garden of trees, collecting different trees, and seeing the physical space of that garden grow. With this said I have One Major Concern I'd like to get out of the way.
Are you the kind of person that's going to feel like shit if you let a plant die? Will you accidentally tab out, kill a tree, and be miserable out it? Do not use this app.
It DOES let you clear the dead trees out of your garden (see above) but personally I don't find disincentives like that as compelling as positive reinforcement. The app is encouraging about it (as you can see) but personally I'm wary of things where I can receive what feels like a punishment because I was only productive for five minutes and not the allotted ten I needed in order to keep the tree alive. the stopwatch mode reduces this, somewhat, but again, you need over 10 minutes. Make sure you allow texts or calls in allowed apps in settings so if something comes up you don't have to feel bad about killing a tree.
Features: Forest provides you one or two different tree types you can grow as you focus, and a nice little plot of land. I'll be honest, I don't think the free version gives you very much to work with, but the premium version gives you different kinds of trees you can grow, events, social connections, tracking, custom tagging system so you can track what you're spending your time off your phone doing, and best of all, achievements. Forest also comes with both a count-down and a stopwatch mode so that if you'd like to just study or work as long as you can you don't have to just do it in increments, which is nifty, and a change from some other pomodoro counters/timers. If using the app to just do poms/increments, there's a switch to keep the app on while you work.
Price: This app is a freemium (on android), but honestly, if phone restriction usage apps are useful for you, just buy the thing right out of the gate. It's 3.99 (also the price of the entire app on the apple store) and what you get for that price is like 99% of the functionality of the app imo. 3.99$ for a one-time unlock is ridiculously cheap for what you're getting. However. The other trees do take a hot minute to unlock. So if you need that cheap and easy serotonin and you have an intense need for novelty this might not be the move.
I will add a stipulation here: Make sure that phone restriction apps are actually what you Need if this is what you're using. if you're the kind of person who can respond to messages and still be productive, this may not be your bag. If you're on a computer and you're going to end up scrolling through tumblr on your laptop instead of your phone, this may not be your bag. Phone restriction apps are useful mainly if what you need to do is get off tech and go do something physical, like read a book or do chores. I do Not recommend this if what you're trying to do is write an essay on your laptop. It is just as easy to procrastinate on pc as it is on your phone. However, For What It Is, this app is extremely functional.
This app DOES have a diamond store and in app purchases to make extra cash but frankly I don't actually begrudge them this. With a one-time purchase that cheap and regular events that seem to allow you to unlock other plants, they seem to have a good content balance and hey, whatever they have to do to keep the app running. I just launched it again and it reminded me I have the pro version even through I bought that like eight years ago.
Polish + Customization: I'm grouping these together because I really have the same quibble for both, there isn't a darkmode on the settings screen, which is an annoyingly bright white compared to the rest of the app. News is Also bright white, so is the store, generally a lot of the things off the main page are bright white with no option to change them. I do not love that. But everything is easy to find and adjust, and though the load times can be a little slow (which is annoying) I generally can't complain too much.
Roadmap: News tab indicates that the app is still being updated and having new plants added, despite the developers seemingly have a couple other projects going- they've got a to-do list app I'm going to have to check out and one to prevent you using your phone while sleeping.
So there u go: Proceed with caution and respect for your specific needs, but it's top of the line in its category, imo. You just need to make sure that category is what you're looking for.
Hey Zep, can I call you that? Iâm Arty, another Dean/Supernatural writer on here! Iâve read some of your vics and theyâre absolutely amazing! Is it ok if you can review the series Iâm doing (sort of a series rewrite) so I can know what to improve?
Hey there, Arty!! Yes, absolutely you can call me Zep. Love connecting with another fellow writer. â¤ď¸
Thank you so much for reading my stuff, hun!! I appreciate it. Though which series would you like me to review? If you drop me a link here I'll put it on my reading list, and hopefully I can get to it soon. đ
The Secret Report is a webcomic I am doing. Could you please review it? Please note that the art is a little bit roughin the beginning.
Here's the link: https://secretreport.the-comic.org/comics/#comicimage
Keep in mind that despite the strip format, the comic is serialized (not gag a day) and the strip format was chosen purely to save on time (that's also why in the beginning it is partially in grayscale)
So, first thing jumps out immediatelyÂ
Which is that I literally can not read your comic because the âSupport Me Financiallyâ subscribestar link is on top of it. It looks like your header bar is set to position:fixed so it jumps down when I try to scroll to read the comic itself. I get the desire to make the link prominent but this crosses into obnoxious (Itâs also very generic, but Iâm not a marketer so I wonât comment on that further), and breaks the reading experience because I have to scroll up slightly every page load. Ignoring the site design and getting int-
Actually Iâm not the biggest fan of these nav icons either. You sort of have to be used to Standard Webcomic Site Template to know what they do, or even that theyâre buttons at all. Thatâs more nitpicky, though.
So, I spent like an hour and a half going through the strips one by one and making notes in the way I often do, but after way too long I realized it was useless, because
Strip 2
Strip 31
Strip 102
Thereâs a remarkably rabid improvement in the presentation, here. Not just the art, but the paneling and world balloons have shot up in quality. Like, the art is still fairly crude and Iâm not going to pretend otherwise, but youâre getting way more out of it now that you were originally. For a comic thatâs only been going a year and change thereâs a pretty significant improvement!Â
I wrote 225 words nitpicking this one panel, but really who cares. Your early comics arenât indicative of your current work, to the point that âThis dialogue from strip 7 makes no senseâ isnât actually useful feedback anymore. And thatâs legitimately amazing for how short a time youâve been working on this.Â
I do think, though, that youâre still having some issues with the word balloons, and I think you should focus on that because itâs probably the highest ratio of âeffort spentâ vs âoutput improvedâ you can get right now. Panel 2 has fifty-six words in a single balloon. The rule of thumb is 25 words max in a single balloon, and 35 words in a single panel. Iâd recommend that you, and anyone writing comics, get in the habit of counting your words, and either draw more panels to fit them all in an aesthetically pleasing way, or try to cut your dialogue down. (âThank you Admiral. The calls for violence from the human religious leaders make it clear weâre not wanted here anymoreâ is 20 words and contains most of the key information)
I would also recommend giving a bit more flow to the logical flow of the conversation. Here, Birvoth says the problems of this world are âInequality, Slavery, Lack of Social Mobility, and Arrogant Leadersâ and Soria tells him not to generalize all humans. But....he didnât. All four of humans problems he lists are social problems about how some groups of humans oppress others, not âhumans are greedyâ, so Soriaâs objection doesnât make any sense.Â
He did generalize them in the previous strip, but then he walked it back to talk about social problems and Soria has this kind of delayed response
Shuffling the panels like this makes the conversation flow smoother, making Soriaâs objection better time while having the interesting side effect that now Birvoth appears to be walking it back in response to her. Which you may or may not consider a positive, but thatâs the kind of thing Iâd encourage you to think about. (Strips 88 and 89 have a similar delayed response thing happening, where the woman says âyou canât helpâ and then Lemmy stands around for two panels before starting the next strip with âNo Iâm pretty sure I can helpâ).
This might be presumptuous, but I get the sense this kind of thing and the word balloon issues that you donât write out your dialogue before drawing the strip. I think it might be a helpful exercise to try writing a movie-style âscriptâ for your comic, and then putting it down for a bit, then coming back to give it a once-over with fresh eyes and try to edit it down. I think that might help you catch this kind of stuff and find your own solutions to it.
I look forward to seeing what your comic looks like next year. Youâre improving at a pretty good pace!Â
The lovely Antimony translated the Magical Girl Story for Fairytale Mifuyu a while ago and it needs a few eyes on it for reviews!
You donât need to speak Japanese to help. Just looking it over for grammar or spelling mistakes (or anything else of that nature) is super helpful!
are you really a mifuyu fan if you donât help? I mean, the people who help review this are SUCH BIG MIFUYU FANS... IT WOULD REALLY SHOW THE FANDOM JUST HOW MUCH MIFUYU IS LOVED, RIGHT?
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
Family CurseTenacity Plys
Bottlecap PressJanuary 1, 2022
Book Links:
Goodreads: https://bit.ly/3XGZqtd
Family Curse â Field Notebooks â 1880-2020, by Tenacity Plys
They say in town that every generation, fairies lure a member of Virgilâs family into the local woods, never to be seen again. Virgil doesnât really care about that; theyâre just squatting at their auntâs vacant house duringâŚ
Hello book lovers! This summer I round up ten ace inclusive books from indie queer authors. The authors themselves either included ace characters, or are ace themselves.
Amazon allows you now to rate or review books you have gotten. Which is a great way to support indie authors without needing to dedicate a large sum of time towards writing up a in depth plot summary. These numbers are important to the behind the scene working of the websites in order to suggest these inclusive books to new readers.
So since GreatAceClubâs feature this month is on the shorter end, I'd like to encourage everyone to leave at least one review on these 10 indie books that have 10 or less reviews!
Many have been sent out for free as club features in the past, or currently enrolled in Kindle Unlimited. But Iâve also personally asked over half of these authors if theyâd be happy to send anyone a review copy. So contact me here if youâd like that and be sure to include the title(s).Â
Hereâs the list! (With genre and review count as of 7/8)
Drowned In Milk Tea - Poetry - 4
Turn To Paige Never - Urban Fantasy - 3
Suicide By Ghost - Paranormal - 5
Other People's Butterflies - YA Contemporary - 3
What You See - Asexual Art Book - 5
Of The Wild - Fantasy - 9
The Holy Company - Romance Short - 1Â
Beyond The Gates - Childrenâs Dystopian - 8
Press Start - YA Game Lit - 2
Bone Diggers - NA Game Lit - 9Â
Thank you and I hope you have a summer filled with joy!Â
