#retransition

You can be a man now. You can be a man in the future. You can live your true self in the bedroom, in life, in your hopes and dreams.

This is a post meant to make its followers aware of whether or not their identities are respected, and aware of its harmful stances.

We do not encourage harassment of this individual.

[PT: We do not encourage harassment of this individual.]

It has yet to address its harmful posts, which bothers us greatly. It needs to make it known whether it has changed its views, or if it is going to double down on its harmful standpoints.

Status-quo-hater has, in this post and this post:

1.

-Said that to identify as a trans woman, you have to have "transitioned into womanhood" - while simultaneously saying that non-binary people who are SPETE (someone perisex expected to estrogenize) cannot identify as trans women (thus equating non-binary womanhood to binary womanhood, when they are separate experiences.) This directly harms non-binary women who are SPETE (ie; demigirls, girlfluxes, multigender women, etc), as it is treating them as either a cisgender woman (which is malgendering by only acknowledging their womanhood) or genderless/gender neutral (which is misgendering by ignoring their womanhood), and implies that they have no social or physical transition towards womanhood necessary. That is untrue. Non-binary women who are SPETEdo have to transition towards womanhood - it's just a different type of womanhood than what was previously established. This falls into the same narrative as calling them "basically cis." It also separates non-binary women who are SPETE from non-binary women who are SPETA, by allowing some non-binary women to use the trans women label, but not the other ones. This is hypocritical considering it has said in the past that it doesn't think trans people should be defined by their assigned gender/sex.

2.

-Said that trans women who are SPETE are misusing the "trans women" label, which completely ignores re-transitioning women (ie; "detrans" women, who are re-transitioning into womanhood.) Is their transition back into womanhood not a transition?

3.

-Told plurals how to identify their genders, as a singlet. It has no right to input on this whatsoever, and should leave that to the plurals within its community. (We swear, no matter how plurals identify their genders, singlets will always argue and never be satisfied.)

4.

For several years, I thought I was a detransitioner. It turns out that I was just a plural system and didn't know about it (we'd had a switch in main fronters in my median system from a genderfluid person to a cis girl).

To me, it seemed like my identity had changed. All I knew was that I'd used to think I was trans and now thought I was a cis person.

It was really hard to have trans people tell me, over and over, that they believed everyone had the right to self identify, but I didn't. They believed everyone had the right to bodily autonomy, but I didn't. They believed everyone had the right not to be misgendered, but I didn't.

My partner and a few friends stood by me and I had to watch the rest of my friends leave. Any new trans people that I met during that time wanted nothing to do with me, leaving me extremely isolated and alone. Terfs knew this and reached out to me many times to try to get me on their side.

All this, and I *wasn't even detrans*. Most trans people think they're cis at some point in their lives. All other detrans people I met during this time were queer and were using that label for reasons like going from identifying as a binary trans person to identifying as non-binary.

i think people who see me see me as either a transfem or a gnc cis guy, i've been mistaken for a transfem in public and online

Expecting their hips and curves to fall back in the same place that they were before starting with the transition and becoming more frustrated at the changes they made to themselves.

Watched Strange’s dashcon video and I started tearing up and getting all sentimental over how they spoke about their relationship with niche Internet history during their panel.

Being a person in my early 20s, who’s in college and reckoning with my childhood being over, seeing them talk so fondly about the one place that was the closest thing to a safe haven that I had growing up is really a full circle moment for me.  

My experience online wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows. Early onset internet access mixed with child neglect was legitimately traumatizing in a lot of ways. But hearing how Strange spoke with fondness, about things that I often times feel I need to relinquish in order to become a “real adult” was really heart warming, since a lot of the time when I think about me being a chronically online child, I think of it in terms of how many formative experiences I’d possibly missed out on.

As much as I believe that to be cringe is to be free, I suppose that on a subconscious level I’ve began to conflate respectability with giving up on a lot of things I used to identify with in my youth (while ironically returning to fandom spaces and revisiting the exploration of my gender identity in the past few years, things that I’d previously distanced myself from due to trauma and social ostracization).

Watching the footage from people at dashcon 2 be unpolished, enthusiastic, jazzed, and unapologetically free, it was really healing and validating. Especially in an online age where everything is so polarized and polished and rage bait-y, and where it feels like the only solution to that is to get offline completely, it was really nice to see that there is still that pure, unbridled essence that was able to hold me when I was a little freak with no friends.