#reclaim

Self-Portrait Series

Part Three - Reclaim

From Constraint to no longer living by the rules comes Reclaim.

After seeing Alemeda perform live at ACL 2025, I was playfully drawn to the song "Gonna Bleach My Eyebrows." Her overall punk rock/R&B aesthetic feels empowering, and it quite literally reminded me of who tf I am. I am in love with the goth aesthetic, especially the attitude it stands for. Reclaim is a testament to embracing my femininity.

"Here you are, finally saying you love me That used to be all I wanted to hear."

During this shoot, I sometimes felt dissociated, primarily because it's not like me to be something different. Even when I initially didn't recognize her, I felt comfortable with what she was voicing for me. Sometimes we may not be the loudest in the room, or we may be afraid to represent ourselves in a way that we're not used to, but removing the invisible boundary we've chosen because it was safe can be necessary.

"And I finally feel alive now And I'm gonna bleach my eyebrows And now I just don't care."

There's a part of me that feels like, "I don't know her," and another that says, "Why are you hiding?" This is a piece of my journey toward becoming someone different, yet it's still me. It's about putting myself and my needs first before accepting how others paint me, and learning to forgive myself for choosing what was perceived as love because I couldn't bear being alone. It's still a challenge, but as I widen my wings and give love back unto myself (as cliché as it may sound), I trust I'll find the energy that matches.