#ravi fluff

Your eyes could only roll as Wonsik made his way over to you with a proud smile on his face. You placed your clipboard down, beckoning him over when you noticed how misplaced his microphone was against the red jumper that he wore. Although you knew why he’d done it, there was no chance of you letting him get away with it.

“I don’t appreciate these games you’re trying to play whilst I’m trying to produce a show,” you whispered.

He simply shrugged back at you, moving his arms back so that you could reposition his microphone so that it sat properly on the collar of his jumper. You couldn’t deny how strong his body felt as you moved around it, refusing to focus too much on it though, trying your hardest to remain professional and ignore Wonsik’s advances.

Each segment you filmed, you noticed him often looking in your direction, watching your every move. His crush was undeniable, most of the cast had picked up on the way that he behaved too, but you tried your hardest to dismiss it every time.

“You can tell me if you like what you see,” he smirked once you were finished, moving your hands away. “You wouldn’t be the first person to compliment my body.”

“You’ve got work to do, and this is not the place,” you sighed.

His head nodded, very much aware of the other people that were around you both. “I reckon I could find a pretty good place if you gave me a chance to prove it to you. In fact, this island particularly is well known for how romantic it is.”

“And you’ve still got work to film,” you reminded him, trying to keep a hold of your composure. “If you don’t mind, you’re needed back on set.”

Your attitude only teased Wonsik more, the hard to get was something he craved out of you, because deep down he could see how flustered you were around him too. He knew he had you wrapped around his finger if he wanted you, he just had to keep searching for the key that would eventually unlock the door.

After the shoot had finished for the day, you quickly made your way back to your office, desperate to head back to your hotel and rest for the night. Everything was set for the main shoot tomorrow, exploring the island and plenty of markets too.

However, as soon as you stepped foot into your office, you knew you weren’t alone. As you spun around, a gasp came from you as you noticed Wonsik stood just centimetres away from you, quickly closing the door behind him.

“So, how about that place?” He instantly asked, barely giving you the time to catch your breath. “I saw how red your cheeks were putting my mic on earlier, are you really going to keep denying that you have feelings for me?”

Your head nodded, stepping past him so that you could file your director’s notes away in your bag, grabbing your belongings and throwing them in too. Wonsik refused to move as you did so, noticing how panicked you became as a result of how close he was to you.

Once you were done, you grabbed your bag and threw it over your shoulder, only for Wonsik to continue to stand in front of the door. You knew he was far too strong for you to even try and step around, moving back instead, folding your arms across your chest.

“Just give me a chance,” he spoke up, staring across at you with a wide smile on his face. “You can only pretend not to be interested in me for so long before you slip up. So, why don’t you cave and just let me take you out?”

“And what makes you think we would work anyway? You’re a star, I’m just a producer, it’s not worth the risk for me to get involved with you,” you admitted.

Wonsik’s eyebrows raised, as did yours once you’d realised what you’d said. The slip up occurred instantly, realising the not-so-subtle way you’d managed to go about telling Wonsik that you felt the same way too.

“The fact that you’re a producer doesn’t change anything,” he assured you, taking a step towards you, “in fact, I love that you’re a producer, you’re normal Y/N.”

“And when things come crashing down or found out, who gets the sack?” You challenged.

His head nodded, instantly understanding where you were coming from. A relationship between staff and star never tended to end well, and whilst Wonsik was irreplaceable on the show, you were very much the opposite, with plenty of producers lining up for their chance.

“I would be careful, you know that, you’ve spent enough time with me to know the person that I am. I know that work is important, but I’m not going to let work get in the way of my chance of love, even if it does end up upsetting a few people along the way,” Wonsik assured you.

“Chance of love?” You whispered, slightly surprised by such an honest statement from him.

His smile slowly grew, reaching out for your hand to take a hold of. “I know what we’ve been doing is fun, but I want to be serious too. I know you think you’re just the producer of this show, but you’re so much more than that, however much you wind me up too.”

Your eyes rolled as he tugged you to stand closer towards him, relaxing his hand against your waist, noticing how red your cheeks had turned once again.

“I was convinced if I pushed you far enough away, you’d drop any feelings you had for me,” you confessed to him.

“Did you really think I was that easy?”

Your head shook with the release of a light giggle, “I’ve learnt now that you’re a lot harder work than I gave you credit for. That still doesn’t mean I’m going to give in to you straight away, I’ve been promised a pretty romantic dinner if I remember correctly.”

He could only scoff at the wide smile on your face, making sure you held his promise from earlier in the day against him. Even though you’d scoured most of the island for places to shoot, Wonsik assured you he had some place special up his sleeve.

“Are you sure this is what you want to do?” He proceeded to ask, sensing he might have finally won the battle. “You’re not going to get scared and back away, or change your mind about me? Because we still have to work together.”

It was something you’d given a lot of thought; you knew that if things didn’t work out with Wonsik it was going to make work a very awkward place to be. But you hadn’t tried to ignore your heart for so long for no reason, you knew that he was exactly what you wanted.

“I’m sure,” you smiled, taking yet another step closer towards him, staring up at his eyes.

With that, Wonsik’s hand moved up to cup the side of your face, slowly leaning down until his lips pressed against your own, catching at your bottom lip before quickly pulling away, conscious of where the two of you still were.

“We’ll make this work,” he whispered as he pulled away from you, keeping his hand against your flushed cheek. “I’ll pick you up tonight once everyone’s in their rooms, make sure that the coast is clear for us both.”

“It’s going to be hard,” you acknowledged, suddenly feeling slightly overwhelmed by the extents you’d have to go to in order to keep your relationship quiet. “But I’m willing to do it, just as long as you are too.”

Wonsik’s head nodded, having dreamt about the chance to be with you for so long, he’d already mapped out several ways to keep things quiet in his head before. “Just trust me, and we’ll be alright, I promise you.”

“Of course, I trust in you,” you assured him.

“Then we’ll be alright, at least for tonight.”

---

Ravi sat in the seat at the restaurant with his arms crossed and eyes closed. He had just finished filming 2 Days and 1 Night and lost all the games. He didn’t get to eat, slept outside, and went to work. He was beyond exhaused and he promised that he would help record a demo in the morning tomorrow.

“Excuse me?” You asked approaching his table. Ravi opened one of his eyes to peak at you, and noticed that you were the waiter whom he was waiting on for his ramen.

“Sorry,” he smiled. “No pictures today.”

You looked at him in confused and tried to speak, “No? I was wondering if-”

“What?” Ravi said irritably and you huffed.

“My phone. Next to you.” You pointed at the phone that was peaking out under the menu. “I had left it here when I sat here earlier.”

Ravi’s cheeks grew warm and he got flustered. He had never felt so guilty before in front of a stranger. Ravi grabbed the phone next to him and stood up.

“I’m so sorry,” he apologized, handing you the phone, and bowed slightly. “It has been a long day.”

You gave him a small smiled and he was taken back slightly by how pretty you looked. He now felt even more embarrassed.

“It’s okay- erm,” you hesitated.

“Kim Wonsik,” he replied.

“Well, thank you. I hope your day gets better.” You began to turn around when he spoke again.

“Can I buy you dinner?” He said. “To apologize for being rude?”

You nodded.

Note: So my new and lovely friend @clytemnestrasrevenge95 shared this photo and my instant thought was its Jaehwan and his hoes in the club and so I wrote this. This is also crossposted on my AO3 which is Blind Dyslexic Bat. Anyways I’m still obssesed with vixx so here~rin

 “Let’s fuck this shit up my babies!!!" A screech emanated from the bathroom followed by a skidding Jaehwan as his socks propelled him into the wall opposite.

    "Jyani babe what did we say about running in the house?"

    "What did we-" Sanghyuk waved off Wonshiks absent mind and proceeded to collect his boyfriend up from the floor where he lay, a sprawl of limbs. Unperturbed by what would most assuredly become a scolding from the younger, Jaehwan wrapped his arms around his mountain of a boyfriend and let him man handle him to a standing position. A quick peck of the lips and he had already slipped away to fling himself into wonshiks welcoming lap, he rarely scolded the elder preferring more...physical and sensual punishments.

    Sanghyuk knew that it would just cause more problems than it was worth to get annoyed before the evening had even started. He already had to go out and cede his power to Jaehwan or else he'd become super bratty and uncooperative. Sure that was one thing in the privacy of their home, but in public it made for a bit of a sticky situation. Explaining why your boyfriend of 27 was whining that his "daddies" pay him more attention and respect wasn't easy.

    "Hyogie just wants you to be safe sweet. Apologize to him or I'm changing to a blue shirt instead of this." 

"But Shikkie!!! We have to match so we can be like the cute mafia couple who never take no for an answer." Wonshik was about to turn the situation into one of those rare cases of scolding when he saw Jaehwans pout intensified 10 fold from his resting pout. "But fine I'm sorry Sanghyuk."

    "Excuse you. What did you just call me baby boy?"

    A "Daddy" slipped out of Jaehwan's lips as soon as he realized his mistake. He really did want to make it out to that club before his boyfriends both decided that staying in and delivering a stern punishment would be a better course of action. They, of course, already thought this but when you were dating a little like Jaehwan it was best to give into a few of his whims now and then. Clubbing wasn't actually one of these but wearing matching outfits was and according to Jyani a club was the only appropriate place for their attire.

    "Why don't we just stay right where we are sweet. I know you like matching our outfits, but how about we get some matching bruises instead." Shik smirked and pulled Jaehwan's body flush against his as the boy straddled either side of his lap. Squeaking in surprise his sweet tried to squirm out of his grasp mumbling something about how that was indecent and that he hadn't even had dinner yet. However the blush that spread like a raging wildfire across Jae's skin was enough to tell both his boyfriends that he wanted it but was embarrassed by this fact.

    "Wonshik I did not get all dressed up with make-up and everything to just not go out at this point. Now whether or not our misbehaving baby is coming with us is something that can be negotiated and don't give me that look baby boy. We let you play pretend that you're the big man on campus to save you face, but if you keep acting out like this then maybe they would like to see little Jyani. All dolled up in his pink stockings and white dress with that sparkly lip gloss all over your plump little lips." As he said this his voice got ever so deeper and he pulled Jaehwan's head back by his hair so he was towering over him.

    "These tight pants you chose are really wonderful sweet. Like a little lie detector and we don’t even have to ask the question.”Wonshik palmed at the obvious tent in Jaehwan’s pants before sanghyuk let him go and shik was able to toss the older man off and onto the couch. This is when Jaehwan realized that his punishment had already begun and that the night would not be what he expected. “Get up sweet we’re going right now and if you protest you know what will happen.”

Without further protest Jaehwan bolted upright and to the entrance way to put on his coat. His eagerness almost earned him a smack as he tried to head right out to the car without his boyfriends. Both of them grabbed an arm and hauled him back in to a stop where he stood, head down, waiting for them to put on their coats. The tension in the room was palpable and Jaehwan almost fell to his knees at the look Wonshik shot him which screamed submit. Hyuk wouldn’t even look at him which he knew hurt his baby cause if there was one thing Jaehwan couldn’t live without it was attention.

To further his torment Wonshik and Sanghyuk sat up front holding hands the whole way and forced him to play the silent game. The only difference to the harmless kids “game” was that if he spoke up he’d probably end up being spanked on the side of the road. Now while he would love this he knew they’d probably end up leaving him there with the message to catch an uber and then locking him out of their house. So Jaehwan was silent even when they reached a red light and his boyfriends started making out being obscenely loud and messy.

“Awww what a good baby boy you were.” Parked just around the corner from the club, Sanghyuk nuzzled into one side of his neck with Wonshik on the other,”As a reward you can act all tough tonight and you can even pretend to punish me if you want.”

“You know our sweet will just end up a whimpering mess the second he tries to say anything bad to you. Although I’d love to see you on your knees for him, it's been so long since we’ve given him the privilege of our mouths.”

Jaehwan wanted to whimper and plead to them over and over for such a present, but he had to remain composure. They were trying to get him to fuck up so they could punish him later. Lee Jaehwan was not a quitter, unless told to be of course, so he pushed them both off and stood up tall. His strut was determined and ready to leave the two in his dust, because he was going to be Jaehwan tonight not baby boy or sweet.

“Hurry up boys! Don’t want to keep my adoring fans waiting just because you two have no impulse control.” Sanghyuk and Wonshik looked at him and then to each other conveying a simple message silently, Jaehwan had switched out of his little space. They couldn’t wait to break his resolve.

“Well if it isn’t Lee Jaehwan my favorite pimp and his two favorite hoes.” The bouncer,In-sik, said his usual joke to the three and opened the velvet rope so they could surpass the huge line.

“You know it. Come here boys we can’t have you behind me when everyone knows its always the other way around.” Jaehwans voice switched from sweet and innocent to deep and sultry as his boyfriends went in front of him and he rested a hand of each of their shoulders. A guy of about 23 who stood at the front of the line blushed and he threw him a wink as the trio sauntered inside.

It was much of this same reaction that they received in the dark club along with a few more bold looks from other men and women. Monsta X’s song Play It Cool was blasting over the speakers while lights flashed everywhere. Jaehwan, unable to not support fellow singers, wanted to get on the dance floor as soon as possible. Fuck getting tipsy first this song was the perfect way to get his boyfriends to grind against him. So he slid his arm down their backs and proceeded to slap their asses and move into the throng of people dancing.

“Oh he’s gonna die tonight.”

“Agreed Shikkie. Totally and utterly agreed.”

The two instantly pushed away everyone who had gotten up against their baby and took their place. They didn’t care who the fuck saw or if they were judging them, because all they knew right now was Jaehwan’s body. Wherever they could reach they did and by the end of the night they all knew his neck was going to be completely covered in hickeys, the only thing visible being purple. 

At first Jaehwan was bouncing around and flitting back and forth between his two daddies. Twerk It Like Miley passed by like this in a similar fashion and it wasn’t till Take You Down by chris brown started that things got more heated.He threw his head back onto Wonshiks chest with his arms looped around his neck eyes closed and absorbed in the feelings of the song. Sanghyuk filled the space in front of him, hands instantly slipping underneath his shirt to settle on his sides.Both grinded up against Jae simultaneously earning more than a few glances when he moaned loud enough to surpass the music. And while a little PDA was good and all both Wonshik and Sanghyuk preferred to keep their baby’s noises to themselves.

The silkiness of Jaehwans shirt replaced the warmth of hyuk’s hands and his back grew cold in Shiks absence. When his eyes opened his wrists were both placed in vice grips that, to the outside world, looked like two boyfriends lovingly holding hands with their third. They were going to keep up the facade that Jae was still in charge but they were done playing along and made a beeline to the curtained off booths on the second floor. Making sure no one was watching they shoved him into one that had no table, just seating.

“We are going to fucking wreck you. How dare you moan like that baby boy”

“I swear to god i’d handcuff you right now if I hadn’t let ours at home.” Both of them growled as they shoved Jaehwan to the ground and held his hands above his head. This was followed by an onslaught of hickeys all across his neck and collarbones.

“Daddies? Can I get a kiss?”

“Of course.” Wonshik went in first to captures his lips but Jaehwan turned his head at the last second. “Sweet do you want to be punished? Now isn’t the time to play-”

“Eskimo.”

“Oh dear. I think we’re gonna have to wait babe. I think he’s in soft mode right now.” Sanghyuk relinquished his hold on their little’s wrist and pulled his boyfriends up to a sitting postion.”Baby boy what do you want to do right now?”

“I wanna cuddle with you and change my clothes. These are grown-up clothes and I don’t like it,”Jaehwan petulantly pulled at his shirt sleeves,”Wanna dress up like Daddy said earlier. Wanna be your pretty baby boy.”

“Aw sweet you are always our pretty little baby boy. Don’t worry your daddies thought ahead and brought you some clothes in the car. I’m afraid its just your short shorts and that frilly baby blue top, but when we get home you can change right away okay?”

“Okay, but eskimo first.” Smiling Wonshik moved in and grabbed his baby’s face smushing their noses together and rubbing back and forth. Without a breath taken Sanghyuk snatched him away and did the same thing leaving all three of them giggly and content.

33.- Are you cold?

ksid okay!! Thank you and I hope you like it!❤

✿.｡.: .:｡✿

You walked thought the cold streets of Seoul, you have fought with your boyfriend, as usual.

But this time, the fight ended up with the two of you breaking up and him kicking you out of his house.

You knew that he could be a jerk, but not THIS jerk, so you could not help but cry. You didn’t know where to go.

You did not have enough money to go to a hotel and your friends… you lost them thanks to your, now, exboyfriend’s controller behaviour.

You sat on a bech and started to daydream about a healthy relationship with him. A relationship where you could talk to anyone without fear of him getting angry, dress as you would like and feel loved.

You would be lying if you said that haven’t fallen out of love with him for months now, but yo didn’t tell him earlier because you were afraid of his reaction.

"Well, now I know." You told to yourself.

You curled up on the bench. It was starting to get cold and your clothes weren’t the more indicated to this weather.

You rested your head on your knees and you closed your eyes.

Just when you were about to fall asleep, you heard a voice talk to you.

"Y/n? What are you doing here?" Once you looked up, Ravi, your neighbour and trigger of your break up, was in front of you. "Hey… you are shivering, Are you cold?" He asked but he didn’t wait for your response, he just took off his coat and placed it over your shoulders.

You hurried to take off his coat but he stopped you. "Don’t worry Ravi, you are really kind but I’m not cold." You lied.

"Please y/n, you are shivering." He insisted and you accepted.

He sat next to you and looked at your suitcase.

"Did he kicked out?" He asked and you nodded.

He hugged you and you hugged him back.

He knows what you need the most.

"Let’s go." He said and you looked at him confused. "Y/n, I’m not gonna leave you here, so please, let’s go to my house, you know that you will always be welcome."

Ooooo, me too, honey! Ravi is wonderful all around, but SHY Ravi is something pure. Ok, I wrote this on the go, so please forgive any typos!

Who: Ravi and Y/N

Warnings: Fluuuuuff, soft Ravi + manly Ravi

As you stand beside him in the elevator, you feel his fingers intertwine with yours. You look at Wonsik just as he looks away. Trying to play it cool, he slowly turns back, but when he sees you smiling, he loses it. He chuckles, low and contagious, and squeezes your hand. “I can’t believe you, trying to be sly like that,” you giggle. “I’m sorry! I’m just so happy this is finally happening,” he says, the enthusiasm in his eyes making your heart pound. This release party for a senior artist was the first time you were meeting his non-VIXX friends, and Wonsik had been –very unsuccessfully– trying to hide his absolute glee all day. Meanwhile, you’d been a nervous wreck. At least Hongbin was coming, so there will be one familiar face. You start to hear the thump of the bass as the elevator gets closer. When it finally opens on the top floor, Wonsik squeezes your hand a little harder. The bass vibrates the hallway as he leads you along, and a bouncer opens the glass door at the end. There’s a pool in the middle of the rooftop, colorful lights morphing and spinning over the water, and across the dance floor. On the other side of the pool is a bar under a canopy of string lights. Ultra-modern skyscrapers surround the rooftop, making it look like a scene from an urban fantasy. You glance out over the edge to see busy Seoul below, completely inaudible over remixed hip hop.

"Heyyo, could I request something for Ravi from VIXX where reader is being super like clingy/cuddly towards him in front of the others and he's high-key embarrassed but loves the affection 😚😚"

Jaehwan couldn't stop smiling at Wonsik. You were back hugging him, pressing your cheek against his as you giggled happily and he couldn't stop the smile that grew on his face at the contact. Jaehwan thought it was utterly adorable and may have been sneakily taking some pictures. Butt was in Jaehwan's lap, his hands providing ample entertainment for the tiny dog.

"Ahh Wonsikkie, I'm so glad I get to spend time with you today!" you cooed hugging him tighter, swaying side to side like a kid with a toy. "It's been a while since I've been able to give you so many hugs!" You laughed as he kissed the parts of your arms that he could reach.

"I'm glad too, jagiya." You could feel the rumble of his voice in your chest and sighed in content. Times like this were the best; Wonsik in your arms and nothing to worry about. He rested his back to look up at you, his soft smile making your heart flutter.

“Jagiya, your smile is so cute!” you praised, kissing his nose, smiling brightly at him as you moved slightly away from his face. “My cute Wonsikkie.” his slightly rosy cheeks made you giggle, so you dotted kisses all over his face, showering him with praises in between.

“Ahhhh, so cute!” Hakyeon squealed as he came into the room. You looked up to see him with his hands together in delight. Your smile only grew and you laughed lightly at his reaction.“Ah, hyung.” Wonsik mumbled, clearly a little embarrassed. This only spurred Hakyeon on to move closer to squish your cheeks, “And you’re especially cute Y/N.” Wonsik feebly attempted to push Hakyeon’s hands away from your face. You laughed again showering him with kisses once again.

“Wonsikkie, you’re soooo cute!” Hakyeon laughed heartily, making Wonsik cover his face with his hands.

“Aww hyung’s little koala is stuck to him again!” Hongbin laughed as he and Sanghyuk walked in, snacks in hand. You looked up at them and pressed your face to Wonsik’s hand and waved a peace sign at them.

“And what?” you dared to tease back, “Hakyeon(-oppa) gets it.” You added sticking your tongue out at the laughing duo.

“Yeah don’t be rude you two!” Hakyeon said raising a hand to chop at their necks. They both weaved out of the way, still laughing until Butt yipped at them; which made them jump. Jaehwan, Wonsik, Hakyeon and yourself all began laughing hard at the shrieks the pair let out. They also laughed, lightly pushing each other’s shoulders.

“Hyung, you shouldn’t have screamed, you made me scream!” Sanghyuk exclaimed, pointing accusingly at Hongbin, who just laughed more as he set his snacks on the table.

“Wow, Hyukkie. You totally just threw him under the bus: I’m pretty sure you both screamed at the same time though.” Jaehwan pointed out as he picked Butt up, walking over to Wonsik.

“Awe, I guess I should let you get up to feed this precious baby.” You sighed, but stood up to fuss over the cute little dog anyway. “Aren’t you just the cutest?” you cooed, “Except my Wonsikkie, of course.” You laughed as you heard Wonsik stumble slightly on his way to get his pet food.

Once he called to you to bring Butt, you took him from Jaehwan’s arms and made your way to the kitchen.

“Wonsik...”You called as you both leaned on the counter watching Butt eat. Wonsik turned to you immediately, the serious tone of your voice instantly alarming him.

“What’s wrong?” you chewed on your bottom lip for a moment before continuing. He waits with bated breath.

“Does it...d-do you dislike it when I’m overly cuddly with you in front of the others?” you finally ask, nervously looking at the floor. You miss the surprised look on his face, but as you look up at him concerned by his silence you see his loving gaze as he’d raised his hand to turn your head.

“Of course not! I might be a little embarrassed but I love how you show your affection.” He presses his hand to your cheek softly stroking your skin, “If I ever had any kind of preference, I’d let you know alright? Don’t worry, jagiya.” You nodded up at him, hugging him in relief. He chuckled lightly hugging you right back, kissing your forehead before pulling you back into a hug.

I hope you like it!!!!!!!!!! ALSO THERE ARE TOO MANY CUTE GIFS ON THIS ANGEL BOI OH MY GOD. Look at this precious man with his tiny doggo! Ah my heartue. 😭😭😭💞💞💞💞💞 VIXX man. They're all so cute I'm cry.

Admin: Gemma

54. He thinks he’s a mind reader

63. Can you just man up and change his diaper?

Fluff

Wonsik sat with your twin nephews on the couch eating everything your sister had told you they could not have and you were honestly just happy with the fact that they were no longer up the wall screaming about being the power rangers shooting you and Wonsik dead with their bang bang!

“Kids are you guys hungry?” you waited for the expected no as you sliced into the vegetables to cook for dinner, but no protests came. Instead you were met with cries and a flustered boyfriend.

“I don’t know what’s wrong!” He defended. “We were just sitting here and then he got up and started to walk away to the corner and he was playing just fine and now he’s CRYING!” You washed your hands and wiped them on your apron as you made your way to the living room.

“He’s hungry, he hasn’t eaten for a while, but he can’t be we were just eating candy! It’s a tummy ache, hey, you have a tummy ache huh?” You took in the sight of your boyfriend trying to stare deep into your nephews soul to figure out what is wrong with him.

“Why he yell?” You glanced down to your other nephew and sighed.

“He thinks he’d a mind reader.” Your nephew furrowed his brows together, his two year old mind not quite grasping the idea of mind reading and how that meant your boyfriend had to yell.

“Bubs pooped.” You interjected. Wonsik held your nephew at arms length instead of closely inspecting him like had been earlier.

“I thought they were potty trained!”

“Yes, but they napped earlier and we put diapers on them remember?” You grabbed the diaper bag and wipes and handed them to your mildly disgusted boyfriend.

“Baby no…”

“Can you just man up and change his diaper? I have to cook dinner.” You turned to your other nephew. “Little man you wanna help me cook?” 

He took your hand and walked back with you to the kitchen. You set him on the counter and gave him the job of taste tester.