#queens gambit

Anya Taylor-joy

The character Beth Harmon always in the back of my mind when I spot two people at a competitive game of chess, short micro bangs on a ginger haired girl, or a cigarette in the mouth of a woman trying twice as hard as a man and getting half the credit.

Oh Beth how I look up to you, your intelligence, your passion. I learn from your faults and mistakes your regrets and quirks.

I feel so connected to you feeling as though I am looking into a foggy mirror after a warm shower, the water droplets clinging to the glass, distorting the image.

How I love your ambition pushes me to read a few more lines of a book, to try to attempt an action before calling for help, to find peace and comfort in my own silence and presence.

However I will not ignore your faults and make sure to think more that twice before I make decisions, how I will decline small green pills no matter how much curiosity and imagination begs me to, how I will use a book or diary to relieve anxiety instead of a glass of wine. How I will use my anger to fuel my passion for sports and competitions.