#quacking quacker

New merch drop was ass but I figured I could at least have some fun rating all of the fits. Anyways here we go (mostly using the chibi stickers because they're the easiest to see the outfits from)

STOLAS

I hate this fuckass so much. His outfit couldn't even be proper ugly so I can roast the shit out of him, it's just mid. I like some of the star stuff but it's so cluttered that it's genuinely hard to tell what I'm looking at half the time

4/10

LOONA

Dear God what the fuck am I looking at? Can someone please tell these artists they can't do the split dress/suit because this is the second time they've tried after Vaggie and it somehow looks even worse. Like what is even happening with the right half

2/10

SALLIE MAY

Talented, brilliant, incredible, showstopping. Genuinely so fucking good I want to kiss whoever designed her on the mouth. That's my butchy femme cowgirl. No complaints

10/10

VEROSIKA

It's cute enough ig. Thankfully they didn't go full split dress like the dumpster fire that is Loona but it's just kind of eh to me. It's a lil generic methinks

6/10

VASSAGO

Vassago is annoying but this outfit is pretty good. I like the gold and dark blue mixed together. Some of the bits on there confuse me though

8/10

BLITZO

He's kind of killing it ngl. I'm glad they let him slut it up this Pride and his star pants are cool. Wish the jacket had more going on though

7/10

OCTAVIA

Aww she's so cute. The bigass bow is a lil distracting but it's so cute for Via anyways. Not much else to say

7.9/10

MOXXIE AND MILLIE

WHY DO NONE OF THE IMAGES SHOW MOXXIE'S FULL SUIT FROM THE FRONT? Anyways Moxxie is fine but Millie is straight up outserving him in every way. Should have let Moxxie also wear a dress you cowards. Anyways idc what Spindlehorse says, Millie is bi and Moxxie is a transwoman. They're yuri together.

5/10 for Moxxie and 7/10 for Millie

BEELZEBUB

Switched to playmat for this one. Anyways this outfit is ugly as shit but not as bad as Loona's. The top is completely unsalvageable but the shorts could have been saved if you tweaked the dripping honey underneath.

3/10

FIZZOZZIE

Fizzarolli's lil jester crop top 🥺 I love him so much. Asmodeus's fit kind of sucks tbh. They should let Ozzie be GNC/slutty at least once but of course the writers are too cowardly to let the character voiced by a black man be anything other than masculine so fuck me ig

8/10 for Fizzarolli and 4/10 for Asmodeus

MAMMON

This is the best image I could find. Outfit is ugly anyways. He looks like Care Bear for no reason. Why does his outfit have an absurd number of hearts anyways? That's Asmodeus's symbol.

Also it's very funny they refuse to put Stella in pride merchandise because she's abusive yet put Mammon, another abuser, in the same breath. But honestly who's surprised at this point?

2/10

CHAZ

Fuckkkk I kind of like this outfit. It's actually kind of cool and I wish it wasn't wasted on Chaz of all people. Should have given it bi colors and made it Striker smh. Wouldn't go to a pride parade my ass

8/10

BARBIE WIRE

This is literally just Blitzo's outfit wtf are we doing? Like I'm sorry but it pisses me off that they went out of their way to give Barbie a girlfriend for her focus short only to completely not use her for the literal pride merch. Don't pmo

1/10.

ANDREALPHUS

Woowww it's literally almost identical to his normal outfit. I'm so glad they included this fuckass bird over Kendra and Striker for the third time now. I'm sooooo glad gay men can see themselves in the ugly bird who constantly hits on his sister.

0/10. I'm tired boss

Anyways that's it for now. Follow me for DCAU content. I think the two main boys from Static Shock should kiss.

I stg the Hazbin fandom/critical community fucking hate women like yall will endlessly bash Charlie for being somewhat poorly written and then turn around and praise the genocidal misogynist who's only personality traits are "I hate women and love to talk about dicks"

What do you mean you have a storyline where one of the main characters gets cursed with lycanthropy and you barely do anything with it? What do you mean he only get one scene going full monster? Do you not know the endless story potential you have on your hands? The drama, the angst, the goofs and gaffs? You wanna focus on the random mutant chicken baby instead?