q!Philza sketches cuz I haven't drawn him in a while
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q!Philza sketches cuz I haven't drawn him in a while

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ME WHEN I UNEXPECTEDLY WRITE PART OF CHAPTER 17 AS PHIL REALIZING THAT BEING LOVED ISN'T TRANSACTIONAL AND CONDITIONAL IN QSMP LIKE IT WAS IN DSMP AND HE RE-REALIZES HOW TRAUMATIC LIVING LIKE THE LATTER WAS AND BREAKS DOWN JUST SIMPLY BECAUSE HIS FRIENDS ARE HAPPY HE'S ALIVE FIRST AND ANGRY HE LET WHAT HAPPENED HAPPEN SECOND
It’s so interesting to me just the shift in Philza content going from smp earth -> dsmp -> Qsmp
(Hardcore fans have always been a bit separated from the smps in my experience, obviously there was overlap but there was much more standalone lore)
Earth smp was very much “chaotic anarchist with a best friend” and that was most of the basis for fan things about Earth smp Phil
But going into the dsmp fandom, this was the first time a lot of people saw Philza in any capacity, and C!Phil…wasn’t much of a character to a lot of dsmp fans, he was just a parent. Largely he only functioned to be a caretaker or source of comfort for someone wether it be someone in the syndicate or the rest of sbi, really frequently he got reduced to “this persons trusted adult” or “source of angst for c!wilbur or c!tommy” instead of “complex character with feelings”
But as qsmp got more popular that really started falling out of favor, I think a lot of it had to do with CC!Phil only being around other adults, so he could say pretty much whatever he wanted he didn’t have to tone it down because there’s a 16 year old in the call which obviously had an impact on lore
But even just the way people treat Phil with Chayanne or Tallulah vs C!wilbur or c!tommy is so vastly different and it’s all pretty interesting to me
I really like that people are seeing more depth in C!Phil now because he’s always been one of my favorites
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
hey! new chapter of Escapism just got posted after...checks watch...two and a half years...oops. (AO3 author curse didn't hit me on purpose...life just got really busy 😅) BUT! I joined a really cool Minecraft server and made a ton of friends and have written a ton of my own mc!character lore, which has been really cool and I have been really enjoying it and I hope I can share it here in the future as well if anyone would like to watch or read about her story 👉👈 anyways, ENJOY!!
Added new songs to the AMFMN playlist :)
Planning on rereading the fic myself today so I can get in The Zone.

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I knowwwwww neither are really doing/engaging in lore but I just want ONE conversation between Tubbo and Philza about the eggs on QSMP. Like. Phil talking about missing his family and Tubbo brushing it off like he has been- only for Phil to snap and like. Get into him about why he's so nonchalant about their kids being taken. Didn't he love Sunny? And Tubbo is like. Of course I loved Sunny, but she's gone. No use crying over spilled milk. And phil LOSES it. Like, really shouting at him now about how Tubbo is heartless and how could he say that about his daughter? About his godchildren? And Tubbo says something along the lines of "I don't get why you're so emotional. They weren't even really your kids."
All of this to say I'm very big on angst
"Do you like your platonic husband?" What? Naaaaaahh
Just stuff