#pw1

“Yeah, just turn right in a couple miles or so, it’s the only turnoff within like an hour.”

El nods in the driver's seat beside him, glancing over at him. “And you’re sure he’ll be cool with… all this? Us?”

He hesitates, twisting around to look at the backseat. James is fine, absorbed in its gameboy, but Vi is digging dust out of the vents and he’s not sure how Aoudh even got herself into that position. Seatbelts aren’t supposed to twist like that.

“He’ll be fine with the monster thing. Probably. Their, uh, personalities are a little more of an issue.”

He can’t hide his nerves as they pull into the ranch. It’s late, thank god—no sunlight, just the thousands of stars he forgot he could see outside the city. The sky looks so much emptier in New York.

God, he’d forgotten… so much about this place. Texas is hell, most of the time, but this. He’d missed this. The stars, the air, the quiet. Not completely quiet—Aodh’s complaining about zir back hurting has definitely woken him up—but there’s none of the buzz he’d learned to ignore, the traffic and yelling from outside his little apartment.

El yawns, rubbing at her eyes. “You gonna introduce us?”

“Uh.”

He should. Just go knock on the door, it’ll be fine, he knows it will.

Maybe he’ll stop by the barn first. Talk to the horses, he always did find brushing them calming. Or, see the chickens, never mind that he’s a little hungry. Take a walk, nap in the car, however cramped, maybe they should just turn around, because this was a mistake.

El is exhausted.

El is exhausted, and Aodh’s back hurts, and Vi is staring (he forgot that it only really knows the urban world, and the internet). James doesn’t even need sleep, and he looks ready to drop.

He knocks on the door, and it opens almost immediately.

He drinks in the sight of Weston, in all his stereotypical cowboy glory. It’s the middle of the night and he’s still wearing that dumbass hat, bandana around his neck, stubble scruffy and hair tousled.

He’s beautiful.

“Ethan?”

His breath catches in his throat. He missed that. He missed hearing Wes say his name, in that dumb fucking accent of his.

“Hey, Wes. Uh, I would’ve texted you, but—well, I’ll explain everything, I promise, but it’s kind of a long story, and I need, you know, permission. To come in.”

Wes stares at him like the stars are dust compared to him, and Ethan realizes just how long it’s been. They’ve texted, of course, almost every day, and they do their best to facetime, but between med school and the ranch’s subpar internet…

It’s been so goddamn long since he’s seen him.

“You know you’re always welcome, darlin’,” Wes says softly, and Ethan decides right then and there that everything he’s been told about being careful can go fuck itself, he wants to kiss his fucking boyfriend.

So he does.

God, he missed him.

There are light footsteps behind him, and they break apart, Ethan remembering where he is. El waves a little awkwardly.

“Oh, uh, yeah, we should probably—“

“Come on in, y’all. Tea?”

Ethan’s been traveling with this group less time than they’ve been traveling together, but he’s never seen Vi like this. It sits curled on one of Wes’ wicker rocking chairs, eyes closed as it drains it’s tea cup.

“Tastes like home,” it murmurs, and Aodh’s usual annoyance breaks into something between sympathy and anger.

“I know,” he says, voice tight.

Wes brings over more tea, sitting down on the couch. It’s gotten a couple more patches in the last couple years, but it smells the same.

“So, care to explain why you showed up at my doorstep with this bunch?”

“Yeah, again, sorry about—“

“Road trip.”

Ethan falls silent. He’s heard James speak two, maybe three times. At all.

“…elaborate?”

“Monster road trip.”

“Ah, alright. Introductions, then, I s’pose?”

He’s never been more in love with his boyfriend’s nonchalance. Trust him to take this in stride, just like he’d accepted Ethan’s turning.

Introductions go smooth enough, ignoring Aodh’s obvious and halfhearted attempt at Wes’ name.

“Alright, folks, let me get this straight. You,” he points at El, face calm and collected as ever over his own tea. “are a selkie travelin’ to find the other side of your family.”

“Got it.”

“And you’re both fae.”

“Would you believe me if I said no?”

“Yes, but I was raised by humans so they call me a changeling.”

“Alright.” Wes looks at Vi, who still holds the teacup up to it’s face, savoring the smell. “I’ve got more of that tea, if you like. The herbs too.”

It nods, very slowly.

“And… you’re a zombie?”

“Undead,” James says, still on his game. “Zombie has some unpleasant connotations.”

“Undead, alright. And… why are you on this roadtrip to the ocean with El?”

“On the run for the government. Being legally and technically dead creates some problems.”

“Home.”

“I knew she was a selkie immediately, but the kid almost actually let me take her name. I couldn’t just leave them here, knowing nothing.”

El rubs at the back of her neck sheepishly. “Not… nothing. Just not much.”

“You want me to leave?”

“Aodh, come on, don’t—“

They break off with a yawn mid-sentence, and Ethan remembers how late it is. El isn’t any more human than the rest of them (save Wes), but she was raised human. They’ve got a distinctly human sleep schedule.

Wes, bless him, realizes this, and stands up, stretching. “Got a guest bedroom, but I’m ‘fraid there’s only one extra bed. Anyone—“

“Those three can share the bed, just… get me a blanket and I’m good.”

Wes raises an eyebrow at the first half, glancing between Wes and the three in question, but he nods and tosses a wool blanket (he remembers Wes making it while he studied for a test) to El, directing the others to the spare room. By the time he’s back, El is already curled up on the couch, asleep.

Ethan knows Wes must be tired. They woke him up in the middle of the night, and he works hard. But…

Wes takes him by the hand, interlocking their fingers as they walk to the porch.

It’s quiet.

He missed this. He missed quiet with Wes.

“I’m… sorry. For springing this on you.”

Wes kisses their clasped hands, and it’s so goddamn romantic Ethan thinks he might have gotten cardiac arrest if his heart still worked normally.

“It’s alright, love. You said they helped you?”

“…yeah. Saved my life, actually.”

“Then our home is their home.”

Our home.

Months since he’s been here, months since they’ve slept in the same bed, but Wes still calls it their home.

Their hands are pulled apart, and Ethan almost protests, but Wes jumps up to sit on the porch railing, smiling down at him. “Now, I don’t know exactly how diurnal school’s made you, but I’m guessin’ you’re wide awake right now.”

“You’d be correct.”

Wes takes his hands, calloused thumbs brushing over his bony wrists. “How long has it been since you’ve done some midnight horse riding? I could use your fancy vampire vision.”

Farm looked up from cutting up the vegetables for the stew and smiled gently. Looking out, he saw his mate sitting in the chicken coop with the hens, softly petting them. He definitely wasn't expecting this when he ran into the big ol brute all those years ago…

"SANS, ONE OF YOUR SCARECROWS FELL DOWN AGAIN." Papyrus huffed as he passed, wheeling this years harvest of melons to the house.

" 'course it did. i'll get to it eventually, bro."

"NOW SANS." 

" 'm goin, 'm goin." He pushed himself off the ground and stuck a new piece of wheat in his mouth. He sighed, mumbling something about how the scarecrows weren't doing anything much. He went over to the thing, ready to lug it off the ground when he froze. Whatever that was, it was not a scarecrow. He gently nudged it with his foot.

"uhh…hey pap! i don't think this is one of our scarecrows." He yelled, a bit wary of the thing.

"PICK IT UP ANYWAYS!" 

"i think something died on it. it's covered in blood…and fur." 

"OK, FINE, I'M COMING," He jogged over there. "NOW WHAT IS SO GR- OH MY GOODNESS, SANS, WHAT IS THAT THING!!" He jumped away from it.

"look, i dunno, just help me move it so the coyotes don't come. we just got rid of them."

Suddenly, a low growl came from the thing.

"holy- it's alive." Sans moved some of the mottled fur and gasped. "papyrus, go get the first aid kit. it's a skeleton."

Papyrus nodded and ran back to the house.

"heya bud, it's gonna be alright. my brother and i are gonna help you. don't give up on us, pal. ok?"

He didn't wake fully till about 3 days after they found him. And when he did, wooh boy, was it chaos.

"heya bud, how's ya doin? i suspect not too well, ya haven't woken up just yet. but you will, won't ya." He calmly spoke, chewing his wheat stem and petting the injured skeletons' back when the skeletons' eyesocket lit up blood red. He growled and kicked Sand off of him, sending the poor farmer across the room and he skittles into a corner growling.

Sans grunted on impact, his eye glowing in his anger, but he forced himself to calm down as he saw the fearful look on the monsters' face. "woah there buddy, calm down. ain't gonna hurt ya. i promise, ok? just calm on down." He slowly approached the monster.

The monster just growled and shrunk into the wall further.

"my name's sans. what's yours?"

The monster growled, seeming to want to speak but unable to.

"ok, grrr. nice to meet ya. let me guess, it's spelt like mckenzie? nah, 'm just kiddin ya. gosh, ya look straight from a horror movie, don't ya."

The skeletons' growling subsided and he leaned forward slightly, sniffing Sans hand.

"heh, alright then. can ya understand me, grrr?" 

He nodded.

"can ya talk?"

He shook his head.

"write?"

Nod.

"alrighty, give me a second then." He summoned a pen and notepad. "what's your actual name, because whoever names their kid 'grrr' needs to be arrested by the name police."

He laughed a little and wrote: 'My name is Sans too.'

It took Sans a bit to read it, as the handwriting was really shaky. "sans? well, we both can't be sans…ya must be one of them city folk, they always duplicate names. us farmers are unique with our names, ya see. however, not as unique as grrr. can i call ya that?" 

He made a wheezing noise that led to coughing. After a bit, he wrote something else down. 'No, don't call me Grrr. I look from a scary movie, you say? What about that?'

"scary? ya want me to call ya scary?"

'No, Horror. Can I call ya Farm? You said you were a farmer.'

"sure. nice to meet ya, horror."

Horror nodded and flashed a sharp smile.

Yeah…definitely not what he expected. Now the big guy had settled. Had recovered. Slowly, over the course of a few years, gained weight, gained magic, gained mental capacity. He still couldn't talk too well, but he was getting there! About 4 years ago, he had learned enough words to ask him out. Last year he could say enough to struggle through a proposal speech (Farm had totally broken down crying and had said yes.) He came a long, long way since then. They both had, if the large bump that was the farmers' belly said something about the whole ordeal.

He jumped surprised when he felt big arms wrap around him. "oh, well howdy darlin'. sorry, musta not heard ya come in."

"All…good." He whispered, nuzzling his smaller mate. "What are you…thinking about?"

"oh nothin'. nothin at all darlin. crop is comin over tomorrow, just as a heads up."

"C…crop?"

"my brother, remember?"

“I’m getting food!” Karkat says, tending to his Minecraft farm. “We have beds, a house, and food. We’re fine!”

Dave looks up at Karkat like he’d grown a second set of horns. “Babe, we need iron! And coal and diamonds and, like, so many other things!”

Karkat just hums. “Maybe you’re right…”

“So you’ll help?”

“Oh, no,” Karkat laughs. “Just save me two diamonds so I can make a diamond hoe and maybe some woods for fences. What do you think about some animal pens?”

Dave groans, reaching up and smooshing Karkat’s face in one hand. Karkat glares down at him.

“Get ‘em yourself, lazy ass.”

“Oh fuck off.” Karkat swats his hand away, flicking Dave’s forehead. “You’d fuckin’ starve without me, in the game and real life.”

“Not true! I know how to order pizza!”

Karkat throws his head back in a laugh. “You’d go broke so fucking fast dumbass. Fine, you gather food.”

He exits the game, tossing his Switch to the other end of the couch. Dave pouts up at him.

“Kar, c’mon,” He whines. “Fine, you can make a thousand farms or whatever, just play with me, you ass.”

Karkat tries to look upset but a small smile breaks through.

“There’s my dork,” Dave laughs, sitting up and pressing a kiss to his boyfriend’s face. Karkat rolls his eyes and takes the Switch from Dave, setting it down. He leans in and kisses the human properly, wrapping his arms around his shoulders.

They pull apart a moment later, both smiling and flushed. Karkat nestles his head into Dave’s shoulder, letting him pull him close in a side hug. Dave retrieves both their games, offering Karkat’s to him.

“Fine, but don’t insult my farms again or I’m not making dinner tonight,” Karkat sighs. He takes the console while Dave laughs.