10/20/17;
I was on my way home and I’ve these creepy thoughts. I’ve been thinking about death. :)
Nung una, iniisip ko lang, “what if magsulat akong suicide note?” And there, nagtuloy-tuloy na. Who’ll be in it? Anong isusulat ko? Ano ung mga bagay na kailangan kong ayusin muna bago ako mawala ng tuluyan? Idk. I just dont feel like seeing my worth. Iniisip ko, iiwanan ko lahat ng pw ng atms ko, deactivate lahat ng social media accounts and all. And all of a sudden, I thought of all the people I love. I saw mom and dad crying. And I couldnt help but feel more miserable. What the fuck is happening to me? Why am I even having these thoughts? Hindi kona makikita mag-graduate mga kapatid ko, hindi kona makikitang lumaki ung kambal. Ate and me wouldnt be able to travel like we’ve planned.
Idk. I could have ended it, I could end it actually, but for now, I wont. I still got hope.
