#pregnancyupdate

The babies are now the size of plums!

Before being pregnant

When I was a little girl, I wanted about 4-5 kids, but then I downsized to 2-3 kids as I got older. I, for sure, thought that I would be married in tip-top shape so that when I had my baby, I can snap back, and I thought I would be a millionaire. I can currently check off 0 of those items. I wasn’t married when I found out that I was pregnant, I wasn’t in my best shape when I found out I was pregnant, and I, for sure, wasn’t a millionaire. I say all this to say that things usually don’t go as we plan them out to be, so there’s no need to be hard on yourself.

Positive Pregnancy Test

I knew I was pregnant the moment it happened. I know my body, and I knew something was different. I didn't deny it. I was excited. I took a few tests after it happened, and they came back negative, but once I was far along enough, sure enough, the test popped up positive instantly. I was so excited and anxious to tell my partner. Once he found out, he immediately cried tears of joy. I recorded the whole encounter so that we can go back and show our child his reaction.

1st Trimester Weeks 1-12

The first couple of weeks during my pregnancy were pure joy and excitement. We were so high off life, knowing that we were having a baby. It wasn't until weeks 6-11, where I started to feel super sick and not myself. Thankfully I was able to keep my food down and eat what I wanted (some things triggered my nausea), but I was dry heaving all the time. I wasn't comfortable at all in my 1st trimester. I could barely get out of the bed because I was in so much pain. I wanted to be active and get exercise, but I was so sick. I'm so thankful that my partner was a big help around the help and came to my rescue whenever I needed anything. He never complained about going to the store and getting me my cravings.

At the end of the 1st trimester, I started feeling better because I was taking nausea medicine every night and my prenatal, but my biggest challenge then became energy. I was so drained and could barely stay up. I remember waking up, eating breakfast, falling right back to sleep, waking up because the sleep wasn't good quality, and crying because I was still so tired. I was tired and drained. I was also very hard on myself because I couldn't do anything, and I always feel guilty when I'm just lying around and not doing anything. I would have my partner, family, and friends telling me to relax and not be so hard on myself because I'm creating life inside me. I still have to keep that in mind. I wanted to vlog and make blog posts every week, but I could not muster up the energy to do any of it. I wasn't posting on social media as much, and I just wasn't interested in a lot. The only thing I did was work, sleep, watch or read up on my pregnancy, watch t.v. I felt so unproductive, but now I know I was being so hard on myself and not to have the same attitude when I have another child.

Somewhere in my feelings, I felt like I was losing my identity. I didn’t know who I was or my purpose. I just knew that I was about to be a little human being’s mother. I wasn’t doing anything for myself. It wasn’t until this very day where I felt like I am a powerful woman, and I have a purpose and things to do. I wanted to be up under my partner all the time and didn’t want to do anything alone. Again, it took me until this very day and him telling me that he’s not going to be here all the time and that we each have our own individual lives. Of course, inside I was crying and waiting until he left to shed a few tears, but he was right. That’s when I picked up my laptop and started on this blog post—him telling me that motivated me more than ever. I didn’t want to lose myself. If anything, I wanted to be sure about myself and my child. I couldn’t let that emotional side of me take over because that isn’t who I am. I was having a moment, and now I’m back and better than ever.

I honestly forgot about this platform, which is surprising because I used Tumblr a lot as an angsty teen. I have been in the mood lately to write, but I have been so busy I have continuously put it on the back burner. I am going through a huge change in life because I am...almost 7 months pregnant. 

This experience has been life-changing and I know it’s obviously only going to be crazier when my baby is finally here. I feel as though time has slipped by and I’m so nervous to give birth. As a first time mom, I know these feelings are absolutely normal and expected. 

The changes I have experienced in the past 7 months are endless. I feel as though I’ve grown so much as a person. I have an entirely new purpose in life. I remember before I got pregnant, I felt sad and questioned what exactly my purpose was. As soon as I found out I was pregnant, that all changed. I became amazed at the what my body is capable of doing. That amazement has continued to grow and my body has grown and changed for this life inside of me. It isn’t always easy to look at my body and see all of the purple/red angry stretch marks. But I am fueling my mind with positive thoughts. My body is meant for this. My body is stretching to make room for this baby and that is more than okay.

Pregnancy Update ! ! !

How far along -  20 Weeks & 2 days

Baby fruit size - About the size of a small banana  

Sleep - Starting too sleep on my side now 

Maternity clothes - Kinda some things still fit

Food cravings and aversions - I’ve had some food cravings

Symptoms - body aches , some breathlessness

Stretchmarks - A couple on my lower stomach

Movement - Felt the baby move for the first time ! 

Belly Button - In

Gender - Boy

Best moment of this week - Getting to know the baby’s gender