#pre-t

Masculinity and manhood aren't only a matter of physical apparence. It's also how you present yourself and how you interact with the world.

I dated t4t when I was pre-T and there wasn't any problem with how I was percieved. There where other problems lol, but not that.

It still need a minimum of trust in the other. If you don't believe them when they tell you they percieve you as a guy, it will be complicated.

But, as a gay guy on HRT for years, (and soon with top surgery !!) I never have and never will have a problem with dating pre-t or even no-t guys. You're enought.

Can't talk for cis guy, I think I never dated a cis person since I came out, but I know some who dated trans guy pre medical transition, with the knowledge they where trans and are still together many years after he started T, so I know it's possible.

"OH GOD THIS FEELS WRONG IM NOT FULLY NAKIE-"

"Warm,,, wator,,, wARM CHEST,,,"

"wait. . . NOT WARM CHEST AH FU- IM COLD H E L P-"

"I am a wet dog and I deserve this weird feeling"

*Grabs towel* *Patpatpatpatpatpat*

"D a m p. M o i s t. E w."

"Ah, shit, I have to sleep like this,,, I have DND tomorrow,,,"

*SUFFERING CAUSE FAN MAKES NIPS COLD UNDER WET TAPE*

Overall, it was an enjoyable experience. 10/10, love Trans Tape, chubby man chest look and all (and no, I don't pass... yet. There's a learning curve, especially if you have a bigger chest [like,,, C cup and above. I'm a B cup AND a C cup cause genetics are weird lol]. I'll get there! I will say, though, trans tape has HUMBLED me. I thought my chest was very, very small and easy to bind until I started taping... Then I ran into the Big Chest Guy Issues™. Whoops.)

TLDR; I am this image after my first shower with trans tape on

Honestly, I’ve just never felt like a girl. Not since I was at least 5 or 6, at least.

In elementary school, I always wanted to play with the boys. I wanted to play chase, tag, dinosaurs, whatever. The girls always played boring things, or just walked around and talked. But because I didn’t have phones like they did, or even a computer or iPad, and I wasn’t allowed to watch the things they watched or read the things they read ( due to conservative Christian parents ), I couldn’t relate to them.

I was continuously told I was “unladylike” by my grandmother and informed that if I didn’t play with the girls, I would have no friends in middle school or high school. However, I was taken out of public school by my father for my health, and isolated from any human contact for four years during the pandemic. I quite literally did not talk to a single person besides my father, step-mother, half-sister, and grandparents for F O U R Y E A R S. I was still not allowed any online access until I was 13, and so I just read and read and read. I was always drawn towards male characters, and never female characters. When I created my own characters, it was always male ocs.

Okay so I know this seems like I’m rambling, but THERS IS A POINT I PROMISE.

When I was 13, I was finally allowed to have an iPad, and I got Roblox. I realized I was much happier dressing my character as a boy or androgynous instead of feminine. I always played a male character in any game. When I finally was allowed onto YouTube, I found some pride videos. I was SHOOK. I had been raised with the viewpoint that any lgbtq+ person was evil, of the devil, wrong, nasty, disturbed, ect. I read a book with a gay character when I was 9 and was physically sick for a week due to guilt but never told anyone.

But when I found those videos, I couldn’t help but wonder… why is this bad, again? The people seemed happy, and nice! And I started meeting lgbtq+ people online, talking to them, making friends with them. And they were nice, too! And so supportive!

And slowly, I realized that I wasn’t comfortable being a girl. I didn’t want to wear dresses or skirts or become a housewife and raise babies, the way my grandmother expected me to someday. I didn’t like being called my deadname and she/her. So I started going by my online name of Comet, then Bread, then Deyna.

I discovered what genderfluid was, and settled on that for quite awhile. But I never felt fully female, so then I switched to genderfaunet ( genderfluid but never any female genders ) and then to demi-boy and then agender and then non-binary and then back to genderfluid. I bounced around for a long time, before finally realizing that I just wanted to be a boy; it didn’t matter what label I used, as long as I was referred to as he/they or he/him!

As puberty fucked up my whole body, I also realized that I hated not having a flat chest, narrow hips, and short hair. I started looking at boys with gender envy instead of just budding attraction. I started feeling… angry when I looked in the mirror to see and hourglass figure and long hair and ( 🤢 ) a curvy chest.

When I got together with my now-partner of a year and a half, I started embracing more “feminine” things because my partner really validated my gender :) I didn’t have to dislike all “feminine” things ( skin care, lipstick, facial care, pink but only baby pink because that’s the only shade of pink I like ) just because they’re gendered as for females-only!

And so now I can embrace that sometimes I want to be a femboy :) not always, as sometimes I would rather be a super masculine, with decent muscles and stuff. Other times, I wanna be a frilly femboy wearing pink and white striped thigh highs and a fluffy skirt and tank top ( tho I’d likely never wear that irl, since I’m pre-T and still in the closet )

Basically, I just dabbled around until I found a label that made me feel comfortable. Sure, I can add a ton of micro-labels, and those would fit, too! But trans is a big umbrella, and that’s the term that, at this moment, feels right :)