#pontmercy

Hear me out. Fantine’s last name is Enjolras. So, after the convent, Cosette is all like, interested in social justice and starts sneaking out in men’s clothing and going by her mum’s last name Enjolras. So, it’s dark and whatnot whenever Marius meets up with her, and the few times he’s seen her during the day, it’s at a distance and only a glimpse.

The barricades happen, and Valjean saves both his daughter and her beloved. Enjolras struggles heavily with the survivors guilt and her father’s questions. Marius is absolutely shocked when he sees Enjolras when he goes to visit Cosette, and finds out the truth.

Marius asks a question, though, which is if Enjolras prefers being referred to as a woman or a man. Enjolras thinks long and hard about this, not sure if what she wants is allowed. After many reassurances, she says that she feels more comfortable as a man.

Together, with Marius’s unwavering support, they tell Enjolras’s father that he has a son and not a daughter. Valjean very knowingly nods and smiles, still loving Enjolras the same.

T h a b k y o u ! 🦉 Why not both, at once?

One of the great terrors of life is to feel, on finishing one's toilet, a hand on the back of one's still-wet neck - in this case, the uncannily materializing hand on the nape of M. Pontmercy's neck belonged to his roommate - we must make it clear that it was not, in any way, the iron grip of M. Enjolras. In that case, the situation would have graduated from a terror to a living nightmare, and the victim should pray for his life before dropping into a dead faint.

But, after all, the current situation still sufficed for great terror. Pontmercy squawked, slipped, dropped his towel and smudged shaving soap up his nose.

At which point he realized it was merely M. de Courfeyrac, bent double in hysterics.

"Choke on your tongue and save me the trouble of yelling at you." Marius sniffled with a coldness, only to accidentally inhale a puff of soap suds. Courfeyrac flopped sideways onto his mattress and clutched his sides to avoid rolling onto the floor. Then, remembering what he scared the living daylights out of Marius for, he stood up, suppressed a giggle, and begun.

"I was going to say - Monsieur l'Abbe, you oughtn't scrub so hard at your chin. Not unless you wish to create the hair-shirt effect on your face instead of your back, at which case you are beyond help and not even Bahorel himself could bring you back."

Marius stared at him in shock and outrage.

"It wrecks havoc on your pores. See -" he pinched at the soft part of Marius's left cheek with great delicacy, and laughed aloud again. "Why, still all nice and tender! You'd better treat it gentler, or find some gentler soap -" He threw Marius's current bar of soap over his shoulder. "- or it wouldn't be anymore."

His sheer audacity had a stunning effect on Marius, in that he froze on the spot and flushed like a cooked lobster.

"Ruining a face this delicious should be a sin. In fact, I absolutely forbid it! From now on you are to use my soap," he produces an indulgent little bar smelling faintly of lavender and chamomile. "-and my soap only. Is that understood?"

"I- what!" Marius spluttered with great indignance.

"Does Monsieur l'Abbe find it too hedonistic?"

"Monsieur DE Courfeyrac!" Marius burst forth, splattering cheap soap everywhere. "First you decide to prey upon me at an unholy hour, when I'm not quite awake enough to deal with your likes... and then you insult my skin!"

"Particle, Monsieur de Pontmercy." Courfeyrac wagged a finger, quite insolently. "Secondly, it was hardly an insult. I said you had d-e-l-i-c-i-o-u-s skin. Delicious. Since when was that an insult?"

Marius, speechless, attempted to assume a suitably annoyed expression. He ended up with a little pout. Courfeyrac, never particularly good at self control, took the chance to poke his puffed cheeks in.

The result was explosive. Cheap soap speckled Courfeyrac's forehead, and perfectly curled hair.

"Now this is an insult!" He cried, wiping the suds off with disgust. "How very abominable! You ought to rinse this thing off at once! And after that, let me show you how to rub in the right soap - small circles, always..."

I need better friends. Marius thought as Courfeyrac splashed him with relish.

**********

And then of course, Courfeyrac would vanish in a puff of sparkles and lavender blossoms into a bar of PROFESSIONAL SHAVING SOAP because this is AN AD! EVERYTHING IS AN AD AND WE SHALL NEVER BE FREE FROM THE SHADOW OF ADS

nay

but this is still highly inspired off this ad (sorry for the cantonese: but you don't have to understand cantonese to understand the vid):