i love you three
hello happy wednesday have this yeeha
requested byyyyy gracerailly on ao3!! fun lil getting together thing!!
tw for
panic attacks
strongly implied bpd
slightly disordered eating habits/mentioned ED
and as always if i’ve missed something please let me know so i can add it!
enjoy!
————-
It’s not often that Regina George gets stressed. It’s even less often that she gets stressed to the point of pacing around her room in a fury. And even less often than that does she get stressed enough to ask for help. But today is one of those days.
So she texts her friends.
georgewashington: Why did you guys forgive me?
africabytoto: Uh… are you okay?
gaylien: you really just dive right in huh no hello nothing
georgewashington: I’m sorry but this is important and I’m freaking out.
africabytoto: I mean… I forgave you because I hurt you just as bad as you hurt me but I don’t really think that’s the answer you’re looking for
georgewashington: I’ll take anything. I just want to know why.
gaylien: i’m still working on it but i forgave you bc i could see you’re really working to change. and i know that’s not easy, and plastic regina never did anything the hard way. so that means you must’ve already done some changing for the better
georgewashington: Oh.
gaylien: and ik it really sucked but getting hit by a bus also did you a couple favors
africabytoto: Janis Olivia Sarkisian
gaylien: uh oh
georgewashington: No, that’s a fair point.
africabytoto: Really though, are you okay Regina ???
georgewashington: I don’t know.
africabytoto: Do you wanna talk about it?
Regina calls her immediately. She has to tell someone. And Cady and Janis are both trustworthy. Well, trustworthy enough.
“Hey, Regina,” Cady says. Regina can hear the concern in her voice. “Janis wanted to hear too, so you’re on speaker, but if this is personal you can just let me-”
“I’m in love with Gretchen! And… and Karen,” Regina bursts out. “Both of them.”
“Damn, Reg, you really know how to pick ‘em,” Janis laughs. Regina groans and buries her face in her hands, even though they can’t see her.
“I don’t know what to do,” she mumbles. “I can’t tell them, but… hanging out with them is so hard now, I’m always trying not to let it slip. If I don’t tell them I’ll lose them and if I do tell them I’ll lose them. I just… I don’t know which one I’d prefer.”
“Why do you think you’d lose them?” Cady asks gently.
“Because look at what I did to them,” Regina groans, rolling onto her back on her pink bedspread and staring at her ceiling. “Everything. I tormented them from the moment we met. I ruined Gretch’s self esteem, and Karen didn’t make it out unscathed either. I could’ve killed them. I’m lucky they’re even still willing to be around me.”
“But they are,” Cady says. “And that means they forgave you too. They’re still your friends.”
“Yeah, friends,” Regina says. “And they’re together, they belong together, and they’re happy, and here I am trying to wiggle my way in and ruin it again. There’s no chance they’d ever stick around if I told them.”
“I stuck around,” Janis says. “In middle school. There’s always a chance they will.”
“But how would… they’re already together,” Regina mumbles.
“People can be polyamorous, Reginald,” Janis chides. “What’s the worst that would happen if you told them?”
“They’d leave me forever and hate me,” Regina says immediately.
“And what’s the worst that would happen if you didn’t tell them?”
“I… I would leave them forever and they wouldn’t know why,” Regina says quietly.
“This should be your choice, but I think I know which of those you’d rather have happen,” Janis says. “If you care this much about them, and we know damn well you do, then I think your choice should be pretty easy.”
“But you guys are friends with them too, I don’t want to… cause a rift, or anything,” Regina says.
“I don’t think you will. But you deserve happiness as much as any of us, I think you should take the chance regardless. The rest of us can deal with whatever happens. We’ve all been through a lot together, we can do a little more,” Cady says.
Regina is quiet for a long time. “You guys really think they like me back?”
“I think Karen definitely does,” Cady says. “And I’d be surprised if Gretchen never had feelings for you.”
“After everything?”
“Yes, after everything. They’re still around,” Cady chuckles. “And we already went through the worst case scenarios. I think you’ll have a better result than either of those.”
“Okay,” Regina mumbles.
“You gonna tell them?” Janis asks.
“Yeah. At some point. Gretchen is coming home for the summer, she gets here tomorrow. I’ll have… two and half months, roughly,” Regina sighs. “I’ll… I’ll tell them before she leaves again. Then we’ll be apart if they don’t react well and they won’t have to see me again.”
“I think that sounds like a good plan,” Cady says. “But you should give yourself some more credit, Regina. You’re a really good person now. I think you have a solid chance here.”
“I hope so,” Regina whispers. “Thanks, guys. I’ll… uh… I’ll let you know how it goes, I guess.”
“Of course! Good luck,” Cady says kindly.
“Thanks.”
I’m gonna need it.
————-
Regina goes with Karen to pick Gretchen up from the airport.
Karen is bouncing slightly with her eagerness to see her girlfriend in person for the first time since winter break, and Regina stands next to her anxiously biting her lips. She really needs to stop doing that. It makes her lipstick all patchy.
She’s in the middle of thinking that they probably make gross lipstick to stop habits like that when Karen suddenly runs forward, sprinting full tilt at something. Or someone.
Regina follows as quickly as she can, her heart aching slightly as she sees Karen throw herself at Gretchen and Gretchen squeeze Karen back just as tightly before slamming their lips together. How she longs to be sandwiched in one of those hugs. Feel those lips- stop it, Regina.
She gives them a moment alone before she moseys over and gives a quiet cough to announce her presence. Gretchen breaks away from Karen with a startled gasp and looks her way.
“Oh my god, Gina!” Gretchen squeals happily, wrapping Regina in a hug of her own. Regina smiles happily and returns it. She notices absently that neither of them tense anymore. It’s a nice feeling. “I didn’t know you were coming to get me too, I’m so happy to see you! I brought you the most delicious macarons from this bakery, I-I hope you like them…”
Regina squeezes her best friend. “You have good taste, Gretch. If you think they’re delicious then they must be. I can’t wait to try them.”
Gretchen smiles in relief and gives her another side hug. “I hope they didn’t break. Let me go get my bags and then we can go.”
——
“Gretchen. I need, like, seven hundred more boxes of these,” Regina groans happily around a mouthful of macaron. She flops backwards onto Gretchen’s bed in delight. “Or just take me back with you.”
“You just want to eat cookies all day while I’m at school?”
“Yeah!” Regina says. “You be the breadwinner and I’ll stay home and clean and eat cookies. Do trophy wife shit.”
“What about me?” Karen adds, stealing one of Regina’s macarons. Regina bats her hands away with a whine.
“You have your own!”
“Yours are strawberry!”
“Then gimme a chocolate one,” Regina says. Gretchen giggles at their antics as she hangs all her clothes back in her closet. “You can stay home with me and eat cookies. But you have to share.”
“I can live with that,” Karen nods. Gretchen hangs up one more sundress before falling backwards onto her bed in between them.
“You two are nuts.”
“Hey!”
“Ooh, do they have ones with nuts?” Regina asks. Gretchen laughs freely at that, and Regina smiles too. It’s good to see her happy.
Just don’t kiss her.
Yet.
————-
Gretchen invites Regina, Karen, Janis and Cady over the next week for a get together, now that she’s had a bit of time to get settled back in America and recover from her jet lag.
Regina gets there a bit early, like she always does. Punctuality is everything, after all.
Gretchen opens the door for her and immediately pulls her into a hug. “Hi!”
“Hi,” Regina says back, resting her chin on Gretchen’s shoulder and giving her a gentle squeeze. Gretchen always smells like freshly baked muffins. It’s comforting.
Much sooner than she wants to, Regina pulls back and follows Gretchen inside. Gretchen gently closes the door behind them and leads her to the kitchen.
“There’s cookies if you want, I just made them,” she offers. “But I know you don’t eat desserts.”
“That was before,” Regina whispers, almost ashamed. She’s made a lot of progress in her recovery, but she also still has a long way to go.
Gretchen seems to pick up on her discomfort and hesitancy, because of course she does. She heads to the plate and picks up two of the best looking snickerdoodles. One gets gently offered to Regina, not pressuring, just… there. The other stays in her other hand.
Regina takes the offered cookie. Gretchen holds out hers and gently bonks them together. “Cheers.”
“Cheers,” Regina says back with a small grin. She’s hardly even thinking about it when she takes a bite at the same time as Gretchen. “Oh my god.”
“Good?”
“Amazing,” Regina replies. “You’re really talented, G.”
“Thanks,” Gretchen says sheepishly. Regina thinks she spies the slightest hint of a blush on her cheeks. Nah, probably just reading into things too much.
Some kind of tension or another continues building, and they’re both almost relieved when Karen comes parading down the hall to find them. “Hey, girl gang. Ooh, cookies.”
“Hi, honey,” Gretchen giggles, giving her girlfriend a snickerdoodle-sweetened kiss. “I missed you.”
“I missed you too,” Karen says, giving her one more kiss before raiding the plate for her own cookies.
Gretchen sneaks up when she takes a bite of one and steals the other half from her mouth with a sly smirk. Regina feels her heart give a painful squeeze and looks away, wondering if she should go to another room to give them a moment alone.
Right when she’s about to, they break apart from each other and turn to her, blushing like they had forgotten she was there. She doesn’t blame them.
“Sorry,” Karen chuckles.
“Don’t be,” Regina says. “You guys are cute.”
They both look at her a bit oddly at her omission of the word together, but Regina looks away before they can read her expression.
“Hi,” she continues, fiddling with a stray thread on her pants. She’d never pull on it, knowing how quickly that leads to disaster. A fashion sin. But it gives her something to focus on.
“Hi,” Karen grins. “This is nice.”
“Yeah,” Gretchen agrees, perched on the counter. “Like old times.”
“Really old. All we’re missing is fifth grade homework to do,” Regina chuckles. “It is nice, though. I’ve really missed this.”
“So have we,” Karen says. Gretchen nods with a bittersweet smile.
“We have a lot of time to make up for,” Regina says.
“So we will,” Karen says. Matter of factly, no ifs ands or buts about it. With a smile. Regina is almost blindsided, but she smiles back.
“Yeah. Starting today.”
Gretchen and Karen both beam at her. Regina keeps her smile as they reach for a group hug.
“I love you guys,” she whispers. Her friends may never know what she means.
They haven’t hugged like this since they were in elementary school. Regina can hardly remember the last time she’d even hugged them individually.
It feels amazing.
“We love you too,” Karen replies. Gretchen is quiet, but they both know she loves them too. They’ve always been able to read her best, even without speaking.
—-
Cady and Janis show up a bit later, both suspiciously missing their lip makeup. Nobody bothers to question it.
Cady makes easy conversation with everyone, ever the extrovert. Janis seems much more hesitant, following her girlfriend around like a lost puppy and only joining in on the conversations periodically. Regina supposes they still have a long way to go with her.
Eventually, the chatting loses steam, and they don’t know what to do with themselves. They’re all scattered around the living room, staring aimlessly at something or another.
“Do you guys want to swim? We just got the pool all set up for the summer,” Gretchen says anxiously after a while.
“Fuck yeah!” Janis agrees immediately. Cady gently flicks her ear. “Yes, please.”
“Okay,” Gretchen giggles. “I have plenty of bathing suits, you guys can just borrow one. We’re all… close enough to the same size.”
Everyone follows Gretchen up the stairs to her bedroom. Gretchen herself picks her favorite swimsuit, and tosses the rest onto her bed for everyone else to look through.
Regina is the last one to go, since she’s working on patience and not always getting the best option. She winces a bit when she sees the only one left is a bikini, and a rather small one at that.
“What’s up?” Karen asks. Regina looks around and sees they’re alone together now, everyone else having scattered to one of the many, many rooms in Gretchen’s house to get changed.
“Nothing. I just… don’t feel like swimming today,” Regina lies quickly, trying to keep her tone upbeat so Karen doesn’t catch on. “I’ll just watch.”
Karen shoots her a look that tells her she sees right through her. Regina sighs. She should’ve known. Karen’s always been able to read her better than anyone. Better than she can read herself.
“This bathing suit would show my back,” Regina mumbles, twisting the fabric around in her hands. “I still have scars. From… you know.”
“Oh,” Karen says. “You know we’d never judge you, right?”
“I know,” Regina nods, still refusing to look her in the eye. She jumps a bit when Karen’s hand suddenly takes the swimsuit from her and shoves another into her grip. “Wh-”
“That’s a one piece. I’ve worn it enough times to know it’ll cover enough of your back,” Karen says with a grin. Regina gives her a grateful one back.
“Thanks.” Karen just nods. She gasps quietly when Regina wraps her in a tight hug. “Really. Thank you.”
“Of course,” Karen says back, returning the embrace. “You don’t have to hide, but if it makes you more comfortable for now I’ll do whatever I can to help.”
“You’re so wise,” Regina teases. Karen huffs a bit. “No, really. You’re more emotionally intelligent than all of us combined.”
“That’s not saying very much,” Karen grins. Regina scoffs sarcastically and rolls her eyes.
“We’re working on it,” she huffs. “I’ll meet you out there.”
“Okay. Love ya,” Karen replies, blowing her a kiss and heading to get changed. The meaning behind their usual salute is… different, now.
Regina likes it much better this way.
——
Karen keeps shooting her glances throughout their time in the pool, seemingly checking on her. Regina tries to reassure her every time, but she’s also not trying to stop her. It’s kind of nice, knowing someone cares enough to keep making sure she’s okay.
After about the tenth check in, Karen seems content that Regina is comfortable enough in their swapped swimsuits and with everyone around, and manages to rope everyone into playing mermaids with her.
“Do you guys remember that time when we were, like, eight and playing this? And Karen was convinced she could actually breathe underwater?” Janis laughs as she rides around on Cady’s back piggyback style.
“Oh my god, yeah!” Gretchen cackles. “Poor thing almost drowned.”
“I did not! I was only in the hospital for one night!” Karen defends.
“No, but the worst part is the rest of us almost tried it too! You were so convincing,” Regina laughs, bent over slightly with the force of it. “Until you got a good lungful of chlorine. That was scary.”
“Oh, yeah, you were scared,” Karen huffs with a laugh. “I’m the one who almost died.”
“You just said you didn’t almost die!”
Cady seems very confused as the rest of them get into a good natured argument, but she has a smile on her face watching the lot of them.
She doesn’t even feel the need to reprimand Janis for joking, “Don’t look, Regina, there’s girls in their bathing suits,” when they all get out for a sandwich break.
“Shut up,” Regina chuckles. “Like you haven’t been staring at Cady’s ass since before she even put on the bathing suit.”
“I’m allowed to,” Janis pouts. “Not my fault Caddy’s pretty.”
“I never said she’s not,” Regina hums. “But you could stand to learn some subtlety.”
“Like you haven’t been-”
Regina decides she can’t risk Janis finishing that sentence and promptly tackles her back into the pool.
“Hey, my peanut butter!” Janis whines as soon as she’s back above the water, holding the soggy remnants of her peanut butter sandwich.
“It’s your own fault,” Regina huffs.
“I was just gonna-” Janis tries. Regina tackles her back under the water. Janis manages to wiggle free this time, popping above the surface to gasp for breath before she pounces to get her revenge. Even Janis is careful with her back.
“Should we stop them?” Cady asks in concern.
“Nah,” Karen says. “Rule of twos. They’re figuring something out and having fun at the same time. Bikini emoji. Hey, that’s another one!”
“Should I make Janis another sandwich?” Gretchen asks, laughing as Regina lets out a sort of squawk as she briefly pops above the surface.
“Nah, don’t worry about it,” Cady says. “She did deserve it.”
“Do you know what they’re fighting about?”
“I have a hunch,” Cady sighs. She looks up to see Gretchen and Karen both looking at her expectantly. “Oh, but, uh… who can tell with them, y’know?”
They both look like they want to press further, and Cady finds herself already wondering what town she’s gonna have to move to in order to avoid Regina’s wrath if she tells them what she knows.
But luckily for her, they both sigh affectionately and look back to their friends.
“If they drown each other will you guys act as my witnesses so I don’t have to pay a bunch of money in a liability lawsuit?” Gretchen asks softly.
“We got you, girl,” Cady sighs.
————-
A week later, Regina has some very important plans to make. She starts off by texting Gretchen.
georgewashington: Do you have plans for Karen’s birthday?
Gretchen, as always, answers almost immediately.
fetchen: no i’m panicking about it!!
fetchen: her 21 is a big deal but i have no ideas!
georgewashington: Do you want to plan together?
fetchen: yes
fetchen: omg regina ur a lifesaver
georgewashington: Don’t speak too soon.
fetchen: oh boy
georgewashington: Can you handle getting her cake and some snacks and stuff she likes? You know her tastes better than I do.
georgewashington: I’ll find a place and invite people.
fetchen: yeah i can do that!
fetchen: where are u thinking of doing it??
georgewashington: Oh just leave that to me.
fetchen: should i be scared?
georgewashington: Probably.
————-
Gretchen and Regina both spend weeks getting everything ready for Karen’s birthday. Karen knows they have plans with the three of them together, but she has no idea of the actual scale of what Regina and Gretchen have been preparing.
Gretchen isn’t totally sure either. Regina told her how many people to buy food for, and Gretchen baked the cake herself. It’s strawberry, Karen’s favorite flavor.
Regina picks Gretchen up on the day, managing to stuff everything into the trunk of her small car before they’re off to pick up Karen.
“Wait!” Regina says before Gretchen can get out of the car and run to her girlfriend. Gretchen freezes and turns to her.
“Wh- oh my god,” Gretchen laughs. She puts on the party hat extra carefully so as not to mess up her hair and takes the party popper. Regina does the same, and they head up to fetch Karen.
“Happy birthday!” they both yell when Karen opens the door, pulling the strings on their poppers and covering Karen in confetti.
Karen shrieks in surprise, but laughs when she sees it’s just them. Regina lets her kiss Gretchen in greeting, used to the ache in her chest by now.
“Happy birthday, baby,” Gretchen murmurs.
“Happy birthday,” Karen whispers back absently. “Wait.”
“Thanks,” Gretchen giggles. “Come on, we have to go!”
“Go where?” Karen asks.
“To your surprise, duh!” Regina responds, wrapping her in a tight hug and spinning her around. “Oh, here.”
Karen laughs as she gets a birthday princess sash and a matching tiara. She’s not so keen on the blindfold that follows it. “Hey, what?”
“It’s a surprise, you can’t see where we’re going,” Regina says like it’s obvious, tying the blindfold behind Karen’s head and smoothing out her soft blonde hair beneath it. “Come on.”
She gently takes Karen’s right hand to guide her, while Gretchen takes her left. “Watch the step.”
“I don’t like this,” Karen whines.
“Shush, you’ll be fine. Don’t you trust us?” Regina asks.
“No.”
“Hey!”
—-
“Oh. My. God,” Gretchen laughs when she sees where Regina has given them. “Regina, you’re kidding.”
“I would never, how dare you,” Regina replies with a smirk. “KK, you ready?”
“I don’t know,” Karen replies nervously. “Teeth emoji.”
“You’ll be fine, c’mon,” Regina chuckles. She climbs out of the car and smiles at Gretchen as she goes around to help Karen out of the passenger seat. Gretchen helps walk Karen to the best spot for the reveal. “Ready?”
“Yes,” Karen says, still anxious, but a wide smile on her face. Regina carefully removes the blindfold.
“Surprise!” they yell.
“No way!” Karen squeals when she sees all her friends and close family standing in front of Chuck E. Cheese.
“You said your favorite birthday party was your ninth when we had it here,” Regina replies, wrapping her arms around Karen’s shoulders to hug her from behind. It’s pushing the limits of platonic, but it’s believable enough for best friends to do. “Do you like it?”
“Yes! Can we go in?!” Karen asks eagerly. Regina nods and laughs as Karen grabs their hands and runs them towards the doors. Gretchen holds onto her party hat with her free hand so it won’t fall off as they hurtle towards the building.
Karen bounces eagerly as she gets her invisible ink stamp on her hand and laughs as she sees the whole party set up at one of the actual tables they have for kid’s parties.
“You actually paid for a party for me?” she asks.
“Yeah, of course,” Regina shrugs. “I think Chuck himself is delivering the pizza when it’s ready. And you get to catch tickets in the wind tunnel thingy.”
“I thought I was too old,” Karen says, looking around at everything with a smile.
“They said they’d be happy to as long as nobody gets ‘intoxicated,’” Regina chuckles. “Come on, we have to play the basketball game.”
“Oh, yeah, yeah!” Karen says eagerly, running off in that direction.
—————
Regina smiles seeing Karen running around to all the different games, greeting all her relatives and friends and taking all sorts of selfies with Charles Entertainment Cheese himself.
“This was really nice,” Gretchen says as she plays a round of skee ball against Regina. “You did a great job.”
“So did you,” Regina replies. “That cake looked amazing. And it tasted even better.”
“I’m glad you liked it,” Gretchen says with a smile. “Thank you.”
“For what?” Regina asks in confusion, looking at her and entirely missing the target. “Dammit.”
“For this. And… just, everything, lately. You have no idea what our relationship now has been doing for me,” Gretchen mumbles. “My therapist even noticed.”
“Because you were only in therapy in the first place because of me,” Regina sighs.
“No, Regina,” Gretchen says. “My anxiety is genetic, it’s not your fault.”
“I didn’t help,” Regina replies. “You can’t tell me you wouldn’t have been in a better place without me.”
“Maybe I can’t,” Gretchen agrees softly. “But I wouldn’t have you now. The way you are now. And I don’t know if I could handle that.”
“I’m glad to be here,” Regina murmurs. “I’m sorry.”
“You’ve apologized plenty,” Gretchen comforts. “And seeing you working on yourself means more to all of us than any apology could. No more ice queen.”
“I think I can leave that to Elsa,” Regina giggles. “It feels so much nicer to not be… like that. Like… it feels like I’ve been kinda… behind a mirror this whole time. Like I was me, but not, you know?”
“I feel like that a lot,” Gretchen says with a nod. “And the kicker is you locked yourself in the mirror.”
“Yeah,” Regina sighs. “But we’re punching through it now.”
Gretchen smiles at her as she nudges her with an elbow. “Yeah, we are. And I’m gonna punch you if you don’t stop cheating.”
“I’m not cheating!” Regina scoffs indignantly. “You’re still winning.”
“Ha, so you admit it!” Gretchen practically cackles.
“I’m gonna steal all your tickets.”
“You wouldn’t dare.”
“Wouldn’t I, though?”
—-
Regina smiles as she looks in the rearview mirror on the drive home and sees Karen and Gretchen cuddled up together, decked in too-small plastic jewelry and holding various little trinkets they ‘won’ with their tickets.
She wasn’t sure how Chuck E. Cheese would be received for a twenty-one year old, but Karen really seemed to enjoy it, and that’s all that really matters to Regina.
Gretchen wakes up a bit when she feels the jostle of them pulling into Regina’s driveway, but Karen is still deep asleep.
“KK, come on,” Regina whispers, gently shaking her awake. “Let’s go inside.”
Karen yawns and stretches, looking around to see where she is. She smiles sleepily when she sees Regina, and it grows when she sees Gretchen cuddled into her.
Regina helps them out of the car and up to her bedroom for a sleepover, tossing pajamas at the both of them and heading to change into her own. She rolls her eyes when she comes back to see them lying sideways in her bed instead of on the floor beds she set up.
“Make room, losers,” she whispers, finding her way over in the darkness. Karen scoots closer to a sound asleep Gretchen so Regina has room to lie down.
“Happy birthday, Karen,” Regina whispers.
“Thanks,” Karen replies, slurring a bit with her exhaustion. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight.”
“Love you,” Karen yawns, rolling onto her side and cuddling into Gretchen. Regina tenses.
“Love you too.”
Way more than you know.
—————
Regina always throws a rager for the Fourth of July. It used to be her parent’s deal, but she had taken over all the party planning by the time she was seven. This year is no exception.
She’s spent months looking for the nicest quality fireworks (i.e. the ones least likely to explode on them and cause severe injury), buying hot dogs and burgers and other snacks, and buying up all the red, white and blue decorations she could get her hands on.
“Mom, wait, those are supposed to go on the railings outside,” she says when she sees her mom about to hang some streamers from the ceiling.
“Oh, sorry, baby! On it,” her mom says rapidly.
“It’s alright. They looked good there, if we have extra you should put some there too,” Regina replies. Her mom smiles, and Regina feels her heart ache a bit at the relief visible in her eyes. Her relationship with her mom was the first one she started working to repair after coming home from the hospital. “Kylie, can you start setting the food up? Leave everything cold in the fridge, we’ll get that out closer to when people start getting here. But chips and stuff?”
“Fine,” Kylie whines, trudging off to the kitchen to help. Regina rolls her eyes and grabs her own box of decorations for the front porch.
She ties some balloons to the posts in front of the house, and hangs a sign next to the front door. She’s jumping up and down trying to hang some swirly things from the archway when she hears voices behind her.
She whirls around, seeing Gretchen and Karen walking up the driveway towards her. They both wave and pick up the pace to a sort of jog to come greet her.
“Hey,” Regina says. “What are you guys doing here, it doesn’t start for-”
“We figured you might need some help setting up,” Gretchen says. “I brought ice, by the way. Can never have enough.”
“Oh my god, I totally forgot ice,” Regina says frantically. “God, you’re a life saver!”
“It’s no problem,” Gretchen chuckles, accepting the hug Regina gives. “What do you need?”
“I don’t even know,” Regina sighs, looking around at everything left to be done.
“You’re not even dressed yet, we have to do that!” Karen says. “Come on.”
“Karen!” Regina yelps as she grabs her hand and drags her through the house, up the stairs to her bedroom. “What about Gretchen, she doesn’t know what to do!”
“We’ve helped you set up enough parties to know how you like it decorated, she’ll figure it out. Now get dressed,” Karen insists, rooting through the makeup on her vanity.
Regina pouts a bit and grabs the bag of clothes she bought the other day. She hadn’t meant to buy an entire new outfit for yet another party, but some habits die hard.
She pulls on her red and white striped off-the-shoulder top and ties the knot into the fabric by her bellybutton. Cady has recently re-introduced her to a wonderful world of proper denim, so she’s paired it with some jean shorts.
“You look nice!” Karen compliments when Regina comes out of her en-suite. “Haven’t seen you wear blue denim in years.”
“It’s so comfy,” Regina says in wonder, tugging at the fabric. “I had totally forgotten.”
“Yeah, clothes designed to actually fit a human person are usually like that,” Karen teases. “Can I do your makeup? Pleeeeeease please please please?”
“Yes, fine,” Regina giggles. “Make me pretty, Miss Smith.”
“I can’t do that,” Karen replies as she brushes primer over Regina’s face. Regina scrunches up her nose as the bristles tickle it, making Karen laugh. “You’re already pretty.”
“So are you,” Regina replies softly. “In so many ways.”
“Thanks,” Karen replies, flushing a brilliant pink. “Hold still.”
Regina does, sitting obediently while Karen tenderly covers her skin in a BB crème and perfectly swipes some blue eyeliner on. She’s always been unfairly good at eyeliner.
“What do you think?” Karen asks when she’s finished. Regina looks at herself in the mirror. Her freckles are visible beneath her makeup, and she only has on a bit of blush. Blue eyeliner and red lipstick, and Karen filled in her eyebrows.
That’s it.
It’s much less than Regina normally does, and she’s not sure how she feels about so much of her actual human skin being visible in public. But she looks and feels absolutely beautiful.
“I love it,” Regina says. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” Karen beams. Her smile is so cute.
“Now how do I do my hair?” Regina sighs, puffing a stray blonde strand out of her face.
“Ponytail,” Karen says immediately. “Halfway up.”
“Really?” Regina asks, holding her hair up behind her head. Karen nods eagerly, so Regina grabs a hair tie from the vanity and pulls it back. A few strands fall out as she’s tying it up, but she decides to leave them. She fluffs up the ends of the ponytail a bit and looks at herself in the mirror.
“Definitely,” Karen nods. “You look great.”
“So do you,” Regina says, gently bumping their hips together. “Alright, time to party.”
“Yes!” Karen squeals. Regina chuckles as she runs back downstairs. She follows a bit more slowly; she has a lot of partying to do and doesn’t want to upset her back now.
“Wow,” she whispers when she sees the lower floor. Gretchen, her mom, and Kylie have made a remarkable amount of progress. Some things aren’t quite where they were supposed to be, most probably her mother’s doing, but it still looks great.
“Hey,” Gretchen greets eagerly. “Is everything in the right place? I had to guess for a few things.”
“Yeah, it looks great,” Regina nods, tugging self consciously at her ponytail.
“So do you!” Gretchen chirps. “I haven’t seen you in a ponytail in forever, you look amazing.”
“Thanks,” Regina mumbles sheepishly. “Karen’s idea.”
“It works,” Gretchen says. “Do you need anything else?”
“No, you guys just relax,” Regina says. “Should probably wait to get the fireworks set up, anyway.”
“Can’t wait,” Gretchen grins. Regina smiles back and takes her hand to lead her to the kitchen and wait for the other guests.
——
The party goes amazingly. Regina is usually stressed during her parties, frantically running around and making sure everything is going perfectly. But, for whatever reason, she doesn’t feel a need to this time.
The decorations look great, the food is expertly prepared by Karen’s dad, the playlist Gretchen put together is perfect for the mood, and people seem to be enjoying the various activities.
Regina lays a blanket on the roof just outside her bedroom window for them, lying in between her best friends to watch the fireworks set off in the backyard.
“Are these legal?” Karen asks as she watches the colors burst over their heads.
“Probably not,” Regina says. “Nobody ever gets busted, though.”
“They’re pretty,” Gretchen whispers. “Maybe the best you’ve gotten.”
“I think so too,” Regina nods. “I think the party as a whole was.”
“Definitely,” Karen says.
It’s quiet for a long moment, all of them just watching the show and feeling the warmth of the others next to them.
Eventually, the last one pops off, and they hear the cheers of the other guests below them. None of them move.
“Will you guys sleep over?” Regina whispers after a while.
“Of course,” Gretchen hums, turning onto her side and resting her head on Regina’s shoulder. Regina rests her head against Gretchen’s and smiles, looking up at the smoky sky.
Best party ever.
—————
Every year towards the end of the summer, the three of them have a sleepover to celebrate. Even the year Regina spent most of the summer in the hospital recovering from the bus, they had their annual sleepover.
Regina smiles fondly remembering that year as she packs her bag to head over to Karen’s house. She’d begged and pleaded with her nurses to let them stay past visiting hours for one night, and managed to get away with it. Gretchen and Karen had slept on cots borrowed from the maternity ward, and they’d stayed up late talking and apologizing and everything they could think to do.
It was an odd sleepover, but one of her favorites.
This one seems like it’ll pose some stiff competition, as Regina walks through Karen’s house to find everything set up in the backyard. The biggest tent Regina has ever seen is in the middle of it, practically taking up the whole yard. She ducks into it to see what Karen’s plan is this year.
“Hi!” her friends greet eagerly when they see her face pop into the tent.
“Hi,” Regina replies. “This is so cool!”
“Thanks,” Karen grins, leaning back in her beanbag chair. “Cady let me borrow an old tent her family has.”
“Wonder if this is the one she lived in,” Regina replies. It certainly seems homey enough. Karen set everything up beautifully. Three air mattresses with sheets and nice pillows, beanbag chairs, and a truly unholy amount of snacks. Gretchen made cookies again, chocolate chip this time. Regina’s favorite.
Karen also managed to bring the TV out, hooked up to an elaborate series of extension cords that are probably a fire waiting to happen. It’ll be fine for one night. A stack of their favorite DVD’s sits next to it, making Regina smile wider.
“What do you think?” Karen asks.
“This is amazing,” Regina grins. “You did a great job.”
“Thanks,” Karen beams. Regina nods and takes the last available beanbag, to Karen’s left. “What movie should we start with?”
“Legally Blonde!” Gretchen and Regina say at the same time, locking eyes and smiling over Karen’s head. Gretchen crawls forward to put the DVD in, and they settle into their spots to watch.
-
“You’d be a good Elle, Regina,” Gretchen mumbles during a quiet part of the movie.
“But I’m not blonde,” Regina replies, pointing to the roots of her hair she’s been allowing to grow in. “I’m dark blonde.”
“I’m sure you’re close enough,” Gretchen snorts. “You’d be a good lawyer.”
“I guess so,” Regina acknowledges. “I don’t like arguing very much anymore, though.”
“Yeah, I definitely think you’ll be a better therapist,” Karen says. “But you would be good. Pink pantsuits on Wednesdays.”
“Oh my god, no way,” Regina laughs. There’s a pensive pause. “Should we do that?”
“Maybe when we’re forty year old soccer moms,” Gretchen says.
“Deal.”
————
After Jennifer’s Body, The Devil Wears Prada, Bend It Like Beckham, and half a season of Gilmore Girls, they decide to take a break from watching anything and gorging themselves on all their snacks.
They could use some fresh air, so they all decide to poke their heads out of the door to the tent, leaving their bodies inside so they don’t get eaten alive by mosquitos.
“It’s a nice night,” Gretchen murmurs, looking up at the stars.
“Yeah,” Regina and Karen agree at the same time.
“It’s so clear,” Regina says. “For summer, anyway.”
“I’m glad it rained the other day,” Karen says. “Not so muggy.”
“Yeah, it feels nice,” Gretchen says, inhaling the night air. “Smells like second grade.”
“What?” Regina laughs.
“What?”
“How does second grade have a smell?”
“I dunno, it just does! It smells like a memory,” Gretchen chuckles. “From second grade.”
“Which one?” Karen asks.
“Huh?”
“Which memory?”
“Mmm… when you broke your arm at the playground jumping off the swingset. And me and Janis and Regina came over after you got home from the hospital to make you feel better,” Gretchen begins. “It was a night like this. Warm but not too warm, clear sky. And you couldn’t move too much, so we just watched movies and then caught the last fireflies of the season.”
“That was the best night,” Regina murmurs. “We all drew on your cast. And I had to be the first one to sign it, obviously. And your dad let all of us sleep over, so we stayed up extra late watching movies we weren’t allowed to watch and then tried to name all the fireflies.”
“Oh yeah,” Karen recalls fondly. “I forgot about that.”
“I think you hit your head, too,” Gretchen giggles.
“Maybe that’s why I’m so stupid,” Karen jokes.
“Hey!” Regina insists, sitting bolt upright and glaring at her. “Take it back.”
“What?” Karen asks.
“Take it back. You’re not stupid.”
“I am-” Karen begins, blinking in surprise when Regina puts her hand over her mouth.
“You’re not. You’re brilliant,” Regina demands. “What was your GPA?”
“3.0,” Karen says, muffled behind Regina’s hand. “But-”
“That’s amazing, K,” Regina insists. “You worked so hard just to get into college, and you’re still doing it? You graduated with a 3.0. That’s amazing. And you’re not just book smart, you’re wise, and you can read people like nobody’s business, and-”
“Gina, I can’t breathe,” Karen interrupts. Regina gasps and pulls her hand away.
“I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay,” Karen laughs, panting a bit to catch her breath. “Thanks.”
“It’s just the truth,” Regina mumbles, flushing bright red and looking away. Gretchen and Karen both smile at her, making her blush harder and curl into her knees.
“Oh, look!” Gretchen says eagerly. Karen and Regina both look where she’s pointing. They’re briefly confused, but then they see a twinkle.
“I’ll get a jar!” Karen says, running into the house. Regina and Gretchen both scramble up to run after the firefly.
“Dammit,” Regina grumbles when she swipes for it and misses.
“I got it!” Gretchen cheers. She comes back to Regina with her hands firmly held closed so the bug is contained. “What should we name it?”
“Mm… Fiona,” Regina hums.
“Fiona the firefly. I like it,” Gretchen grins. “She tickles.”
“What, you don’t like tiny little bug feet crawling all over your hand?” Regina giggles.
“No! Ew,” Gretchen whines. “Don’t say that.”
“Sorry,” Regina says. Karen comes running out with an empty peanut butter jar, with a few wet leaves inside and holes poked in the lid. Gretchen gently plops their new firefly friend inside and slams the lid back on so she can’t escape. “There’s another one!”
They’re a bit hard to find, being so late in the season, but the three of them spend the evening running around catching every little firefly they see.
When the jar is sufficiently full, they head back into their tent and get comfy on their air beds. Karen and Gretchen push theirs together so they can snuggle. Regina wants to join, but she figures that’s more than a little bit creepy and settles for keeping her own bed close by. The jar rests in between them, the bugs twinkling and illuminating their tent like a nightlight.
“Goodnight,” Gretchen yawns, cuddling into Karen’s back.
“Goodnight,” Karen replies, turning around for a second to kiss her. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” Gretchen mumbles sleepily. “Love you, Gina.”
“I love you too,” Regina replies softly. “Both of you. Goodnight.”
—————
Regina remembers on August first that she signed up for a portrait photography class this semester. She also remembers she’s never tried portrait photography before. So, as always, she reaches out to Gretchen and Karen for help.
reginald: Why is this my name?
reginald: You know what, never mind. Do you guys want some couples photos?
fetchen: uhm… sure!!
sexymouse: 📸📷🤳
fetchen: she says okay too!
reginald: Okay, great. I signed up for a portrait photography class this semester but I’ve never done portrait photography. So everybody benefits.
fetchen: you’d make a great photographer!
reginald: Thanks, Gretch.
—-
“Hey, Gina,” Karen calls as she and Gretchen make their way over to her in the park.
“Hi,” Regina grins. “You guys look beautiful.”
Karen is in some denim shorts and a slightly dressy top, and Gretchen is in a sundress that compliments Karen’s outfit perfectly.
“Thanks,” Gretchen grins, doing her signature heel pop. Regina laughs, pulling her camera out of her bag and looping the strap around her neck. “What do you need us to do?”
“For now, just… act like you’re on a normal date. Pretend I’m not here,” Regina says.
“But you are here,” Karen says, almost pouting.
“Just do what you normally do, don’t look at the camera,” Regina giggles. “You don’t have to totally ignore me if you don’t want to.”
“Oh. Okay,” Karen says, seeming much happier with this arrangement.
Regina stays behind them while they walk hand in hand down one of the many walking paths around. She snaps the occasional candid shot of their hands intertwined or them looking at one another as they make conversation, lit by the not-quite setting sun overhead. Regina wanted a few shots with broad light, and some after golden hour begins.
Eventually they make it to a small creek. There’s a few other people; couples or families with kids taking them fishing or to hunt for crawdads with nets they probably got from the dollar store. Karen immediately kicks off her sandals and wades in. The deepest of the water doesn’t even come up to her knees.
“Come on,” she coaxes, as Gretchen stands on the shore looking rather more apprehensive. Regina crouches down a bit and snaps a few photos of Karen alone in the water, reaching out to Gretchen with a wide, but natural (and unfairly beautiful) smile on her face.
“You’ll get blisters walking with wet shoes,” Gretchen chides lovingly.
“So I won’t put them back on,” Karen retaliates. “Come on, it’s not that bad. It’s just cold.”
Gretchen sighs and kicks off her own shoes, wading over to her girlfriend. She squeals at the frigid temperature of the water and rushes over to Karen as fast as she can. Karen wraps her in a hug, lulling her into a false sense of security.
Gretchen squeals as Karen suddenly kicks at her, showering her in icy cold water. “Hey! That was mean.”
Karen shuffles over as Gretchen turns around and pouts, seeming genuinely upset. Regina herself is about to go see if she’s okay when Gretchen suddenly whirls around and dumps a handful of the water down Karen’s shirt.
She cackles when Karen gasps at the chill with a, “Hey!”
“You started it,” Gretchen giggles, squealing and ‘running’ away as fast as she can. Karen chases after her, but their top speed is quite slow and Gretchen has a head start. Regina takes several action shots of them chasing each other around and cackling like mad witches.
“Don’t you drag me into this,” Regina says as Gretchen hides behind her for protection.
“Your camera is expensive,” Gretchen retaliates, peeking around her shoulder to see where Karen is. “I’m safe here.”
“Fine,” Regina sighs. Gretchen hums happily as Regina leans back in her hold, resting her head on Regina’s shoulder as they wait for Karen to slosh her way over.
“My feet are cold,” Karen says when she finally makes it.
“I did tell you, honey,” Gretchen giggles. “Go get our stuff.”
“Aren’t you coming?”
“You go first,” Gretchen says. “Don’t trust you.”
Karen pouts. Gretchen rolls her eyes lovingly.
“I trust you in general. Just not around water,” she amends.
“Hmph,” Karen continues pouting. Regina tenses a bit as Gretchen leans around her to kiss Karen’s pout away, accidentally sandwiching Regina between them.
“Go on,” Gretchen murmurs. Karen smiles a bit and sloshes her way back to the shore. Gretchen pulls away from Regina and starts to follow, but pauses when she doesn’t hear Regina’s footsteps coming after her. “What’s the matter?”
“Nothing,” Regina whispers immediately. She can feel the words resting on the tip of her tongue, threatening to tip out, to spill. She bites her tongue so hard tears start to well in her eyes. Bites the words back so hard she tastes the tang of blood.
“Are you sure? We can take a break,” Gretchen offers, taking small steps back in her direction.
“No! I’m fine, Gretchen,” Regina bites, falling back into the comforting embrace of anger she found herself in for so many years. Gretchen’s face twinges, falls, and Regina finds herself face to face with something she’s spent years desperately trying to avoid. “Shit. I’m sorry, Gretch, I didn’t… I know you’re just… I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” Gretchen says gently.
“No, it’s not! It never has been, I just…” Regina begins. “I’m sorry. For everything.”
“I know,” Gretchen says. “I know you are. And I can see you working on it. I know this isn’t you.”
“I think it is,” Regina mumbles. Gretchen shakes her head, her dark hair swishing around her shoulders with the motion.
“I know it’s not. If it was we never would have seen you be kind again. That’s you,” she insists. “I don’t know what happened, but you only do this when you’re hurting.”
You’re protecting yourself, Regina hears her therapist’s voice echo in her head. Just in an unhealthy way.
But how do I stop? Regina’s voice begs back. I can’t do this anymore.
Work on healing, and find the right people.
The right people are right in front of her.
“You should go get Karen, she’s waiting for you,” Regina sighs shakily. “I’ll… I’ll be there in a second. I just need a minute.”
“Okay,” Gretchen says gently. She rests a caring hand against her arm before pulling away, turning around and making her way out of the creek.
Regina sighs and blinks back tears. She thinks about splashing some of the water on her face, but it’s green, and she decides it’s not worth risking some kind of brain-eating amoeba.
She gives herself three minutes, carefully counting each and every second that passes. Any longer and her friends will start to worry more than they already are. Counting gives her something else to focus on, helps her ground herself the slightest bit and pull her thoughts away from the swirling cesspool they’re threatening to dive into.
“There she is,” Karen says with a bright smile as she sees Regina claw her way through the tree line that outlines the creek.
“Hey,” Regina says softly.
“Hey,” Gretchen echoes. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” Regina says immediately.
“Do you need any more pictures?” Karen asks.
“I have a few more I want to get, if you guys have time?”
“Of course,” Gretchen says. “We have all night.”
“Well, I don’t have the lenses for night photography with me, so it won’t be that long,” Regina teases. “But, um… I brought props. To try.”
“Ooh,” Karen says immediately. Her eyes brighten as Regina rests her bag on the ground and pulls out two flags. The pan one gets handed to Karen, and the bi one to Gretchen. “Ooh!”
“Wait, don’t be cute yet!” Regina says as Karen holds her flag over her head and twirls around. She scrambles for her camera and to get a good angle, adjusting her settings for the motion and snapping as many good pictures as she can.
Karen eventually slows down, her hair wild around her from her twirling as she pants to catch her breath back. “I’m dizzy.”
“Your hair looks fantastic, though,” Gretchen giggles. “Like you just got a blowout.”
“Thanks,” Karen replies, jokingly tossing her hair over her shoulder. Regina still almost chokes, and Gretchen is practically drooling.
Regina leaves them to do whatever feels natural with their flags, taking some beautiful shots of Gretchen with hers held triumphantly over her head, practically glowing in the light of the setting sun.
She feels her heart seize a bit when they both wrap their flags around their shoulders like superhero capes and lean in for a kiss. Regina continues taking pictures, but she feels her eyes start watering and knows her knuckles are probably white with her grip on her camera. God damn it, not now.
“Gina?” Karen asks knowingly when they break apart. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing,” Regina whispers.
“Yes thing,” Karen retaliates childishly.
“You can tell us,” Gretchen says kindly. Regina blinks back tears at the lack of malice in her voice, the gentleness of her grip as she takes and squeezes her hand.
This is it.
“I…” Regina tries to begin. She pauses and takes a deep breath. “No, I can’t.”
“What is it?” Karen asks. She looks to Gretchen in concern when Regina bursts into tears in front of them. Regina hunches in on herself, crossing her arms over her chest protectively. Protect your heart. At any cost.
“Regina,” Gretchen says, reaching for her again. She gets a wounded look when Regina steps away, but respectfully pulls her hand back. “It’s okay.”
“It’s not,” Regina sobs. “I-I-I-”
“Deep breath,” Karen says in the same tone of voice she uses when Gretchen has a panic attack. “Take your time. I promise you can tell us, it’ll be okay.”
Deep breath. Take your- “I love you! I-I’m in love with you. Both of you. And I-I know… I know you d-don’t feel the same, I just… I had to tell you, I can’t… I can’t live like this anymore. I’m-I’m so sorry.”
Gretchen and Karen look at each other with wide eyes. This was most definitely not something they were expecting to hear. Neither of them get a spectacular amount of time to process as Regina suddenly starts hyperventilating and nearly collapses to the ground in front of them.
“Whoa, Regina,” Karen says, immediately going to help her. Gretchen quickly follows, sinking to her knees in front of her. Regina starts panicking harder and trying to get away, but this time they don’t let her.
“Gina, hey. Look at me,” Gretchen says gently. “We’re not mad at you, okay? We’re not upset. I promise. We can talk about this when you’re ready, but for now we just want to help you, okay?”
Regina looks at her and sees nothing but warmth and concern in her eyes. She can barely move her hands, they’re shaking so hard, but she forces herself to hold Gretchen’s outstretched one and nods. Karen sits on the ground behind her and hugs her; squeezes her to apply pressure to ground her. She supports Regina’s spine so it isn’t aggravated and seems content to just be Regina’s anchor. Tether her to Earth. Regina can feel her breathing against her back and tries desperately to match it before she sinks too far into this panic.
“Good, breathe with Karen,” Gretchen says gently. Regina can feel Karen nod against her shoulder. She does her best to and continues looking at Gretchen’s eyes. Why is she being so nice? Why are both of them being so nice?
Gretchen also seems to be panicking slightly as she tries to work out what she can do to help her.
“Okay, uhm… just try to stay here with me, okay? Nothing else matters right now. Just… do your best not to think. Uh…” she stutters. Karen’s usual go to for her is the countdown strategy, but Regina seems too upset to even do that. So, Gretchen starts talking. She’s not totally sure what to talk about, but she just goes for it. “Do you remember the day we met?”
Regina looks at her and nods shakily. Gretchen gives her a sad smile and continues talking.
“In preschool. I was crying because my mom left and you came over,” she recalls fondly. “You didn’t say anything for a long time, you just sat next to me while I cried and held my hand. And then when I calmed down you said we had the same shoes on and that meant we had to be best friends. And you took me to your table with Karen and Janis and showed me the play-doh. And then KK kept eating it and got it taken away.”
Regina lets out a strange, harsh sound, a mix between a laugh and another sob.
“I never told you, but I’ve remembered that day forever,” Gretchen continues softly. “In middle and high school, when you were… you know. I would think about that day. And it helped, a lot. Because I knew that little girl who held my hand while I cried, my best friend, was still in there somewhere. And here you are. I’m so glad we’ve managed to stay friends all these years.”
“I am too,” Karen adds quietly from behind her. “You were always a good friend. Even when you weren’t.”
Regina is stunned almost quiet. She’s so busy trying to process what Karen means that she forgets what she was originally panicking about in the first place. Gretchen squeezes her hands once more to get her attention and gives her a gentle smile.
“Can you count backwards from ten with me? Just focus on us again. And take a deep breath with every one,” she says kindly. Regina nods shakily.
“T-ten.” Regina says. In through the nose, out through the mouth.
“Nine.” Focus on Gretchen.
“Eight.” Her eyes.
“Se-sev-seven.” Her hands.
“Six.” Her heart.
“F-five.” Deep breath.
“Four.” Focus on Karen.
“Three.” Her hold.
“T-two.” Her warmth.
“One.” Her.
“Good,” Gretchen says.
“Are you feeling any better?” Karen pipes up, massaging Regina’s arms gently and helping her stand again. Regina nods with a shaky sniffle.
“I’ve really done it now, haven’t I?”
“You haven’t done anything,” Gretchen says. Karen nods, now that Regina can see her again. “I-I… I’m not going to lie and say I’ve never felt the same way.”
“I definitely have too,” Karen adds. “I’m sorry we can’t give you a solid answer now. But we… need to talk this over. Make sure we’re using the same emojis, you know?”
Regina gives a watery chuckle and nods. “I know. I’m sorry to dump this on the both of you now.”
“No, Gina,” Gretchen says. “We’re glad you told us. We just need some time before we can do this the right way for all of us.”
“I understand. You-you guys take all the time you need,” Regina says as she packs all her things back up. “I’ll be here. Uh… thanks. For helping me, and everything.”
“Anytime,” Karen says. “Bye.”
“Bye, Gina.”
“Bye, guys.”
-
Regina can feel it burning the whole drive home. For the first time in almost fifteen years, she sinks into her mother’s arms for comfort, and cries.
————-
Regina doesn’t hear anything until two days before Gretchen has to fly back to France. She’s spent most of the week hiding in bed, cuddling her pillows and watching Netflix in a ditch attempt to not think about the situation. And crying, she spent a solid amount of time crying.
But she wakes up to a text.
sexymouse: 🥞🧇🍳 ???
reginald: Sure. Usual place?
sexymouse: 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
fetchen: we’ll meet you there at ten :)))
reginald: Okay. See you then. :)
Regina sighs as she removes herself from her blanket cave for the first time in four days and pads to the bathroom to take a shower. What could this be about?
She nearly works herself into another panic attack as she brushes and blow dries her hair. What if they’re about to let her know they don’t feel the same? And that they don’t want to see her ever again?
No, they wouldn’t do that, she thinks to herself as she brushes her teeth. Would they? The texts didn’t sound any different than normal. Well, it’s hard to tell sometimes with Karen, but Gretchen sent a smiley face. With three mouths, that must mean something at least okay, if not good?
“God, girl stuff sucks.”
-
“Hey, Gina,” Gretchen greets as Regina slides into their usual booth across from her friends.
“Hi.”
“We ordered for you,” Karen says, pushing a plate of strawberry banana crepes closer to her. Regina smiles slightly when she sees they remembered her favorite. They haven’t even eaten here together since seventh grade.
“Thank you,” she says genuinely, pouring some syrup out on the side like she always does. “How-uhm. How are you two?”
“We’re good,” Gretchen replies. “How are you? Feeling any better?”
Regina nods. “I… yeah. I mean, you get why I’m not… totally back to myself, yet. But I’m much better than the other day.”
“Good,” Karen nods. Gretchen smiles fondly as she follows it with an entirely too-large bite of waffle. Regina grins as well, giving a slight chuckle when Gretchen helpfully dabs some stray syrup off of Karen’s chin. They deserve each other.
They continue making light conversation throughout their meal, but there’s a thrumming undertone of anxiety and anticipation that has Regina practically shaking in her Louboutin’s. Regina pays for the food, batting both other cards away and throwing her own at their waiter and shoving him back to process it.
“Thanks, Gina,” Karen says. Regina just nods.
“Of course.”
—-
“So, Gina, uhm…” Gretchen stutters about a quarter of the way through their walk in the park to get rid of the sticky full feeling in their bellies. “We have a… proposition for you.”
That doesn’t sound good, Regina thinks. She says, “Um… okay. Shoot.”
“Will you date us?” Karen asks. Regina freezes mid-step and chokes on air.
“Wh-what?”
“We know this isn’t a great time,” Gretchen says almost apologetically. “Since I’m leaving again. But we talked it over, and we’re willing to try if you are.”
“You’re serious?” Regina checks, looking at both of their faces for even the slightest hint of insincerity. Nothing. All she sees is two of the most loving faces she’s ever been confronted with. “Yes! Oh my god, what?!”
They both laugh as she rockets in between them for a hug, and press in on either side to kiss her cheeks. They pause when they hear a sniffle and can taste the few tears streaming down her face. “Why are you crying?”
“I’m sorry,” Regina sobs. “I just… I thought you both would hate-hate me, when I told you. I never thought this-this would… actually happen, you know? I’m-I’m so happy.”
“Aww, honey,” Gretchen coos. “If we didn’t hate you when you were a raging bitch, we definitely won’t hate you for loving us.”
Regina gives a watery laugh at that. Gretchen isn’t usually so frank or vulgar, so it’s almost a shock, but she’s most definitely not wrong. “I do. I love you.”
“I love you too,” Gretchen hums. “Can I kiss you?”
Regina nods eagerly and leans in. Gretchen meets her halfway and kisses her so gently. Her lips are slightly chapped from her habit of biting them, but so, so soft. She can faintly taste the delightful flavors of cinnamon and maple off her lips, and smell the enchanting aroma of baked goods that always manages to follow Gretchen. It feels like home.
They smile at each other when they break apart. Regina repeats, “I love you.”
“I love you too,” Gretchen beams, pecking her gently one more time.
“I love you… three,” Karen pipes up. “My turn?”
Regina laughs and leans in. Karen is more confident, eager in kissing. Gretchen was more anxious, more careful. Karen knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to take it, swiping her tongue at Regina’s lips and allowing her to taste the powdered sugar and maple syrup faintly left from their breakfast. Regina’s close enough to faintly smell the fruitiness of her perfume. She wants more.
“I love you, Karen,” Regina murmurs when they break apart. Karen smiles back and kisses her cheek. “Was… was that a date?”
“It was supposed to be, yeah,” Gretchen giggles.
“Oh.”
————-
“I don’t want you to go,” Regina whimpers into Gretchen’s shoulder at the airport. “I just got you.”
“I know,” Gretchen attempts to soothe through her own tears. “I’ll be back in December. You and Karen have four and a half months to think of a perfect Chanukah present for me.”
Regina gives a watery laugh into her shoulder and squeezes her tighter. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” Gretchen says. “Karebear, come here. Group hug.”
Karen comes over and worms her way in between them. She gets her own few kisses from Gretchen and stays in the cuddle.
They stay huddled together as long as they can, all crying quietly and peppering kisses on whoever they can reach. A falsely kind woman’s voice rings out over the speakers to announce Gretchen’s flight boarding.
Gretchen cups Karen’s face and gives her a solid kiss. But this time, she turns to Regina after they break apart and does the same to her. “I love you. And I love you.”
“I love you too.”
“I love you three,” Regina chuckles around a sob. Gretchen kisses their cheeks one more time before she turns around and heads off to her gate. Regina and Karen stay and wave until she’s out of sight before leaving the airport hand in hand.
“It never gets easier,” Karen sobs quietly. Regina squeezes her hand and nods. “But now I have you.”
Regina looks at her and gives her a watery smile. “And I have you. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
They can feel Gretchen’s ‘I love you three’ from thousands of miles away.
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thanks for reading! hope you enjoyed!
