#poetsonig

Crying in the middle of the day should be a

Thing, i mean it's always the day that

I still dream about you.

Never for any particular reason,

other than the times

I let myself

melt into my sheets

and believe

that I’m moving on

with the hope

that it will stay.

I still dream about you,

but not the good kind.

Not the ones I used to have

when I dreamed I was next to you

and could breathe in

the way you make me punch-drunk love

on your hugs.

No, not the good kind.

It’s the kind where I dream

that you show up or I run into you

and you don’t even know my name.

And I still feel

the same way,

but you don’t;

an endless dream-chase

of asking you

to look at me.

That’s the thing about

being a realist.

That’s the thing about

eating your promises for my breakfast

and dreaming about

your touch.

When I wake up,

I have to remember

none of it is real

except for the part

where I still read your letters

looking for you 

to see me

reading you back to life.

It’s only real

when I love you with my whole memory

so deeply

that my body begs me

to rest

long enough to try to forget 

once more. 

I keep a pretty paltry pantry

These days.

Not thinking much farther ahead

To a meal

Or a day

Or a face full of lead.

However minimalist,

I feel no compulsion

To answer single-word messages;

Ejaculation, expulsion.

Hey

Hi

Hello

Sup

Hot

Beaut

Cute

I could starve myself to death

And never be so thin

As all that drivel.

Call a paramedic

Scrape your jaw up off the table.

Consider yourself blessed

That I cannot be condensed

To return a one-word threat or

Condescension’s scathing

Vengeance.

I gift you more than you gave me...

By my silence.

_________________________________

Who you are

You do not choose your purpose

It chooses you

If you do not choose it

It will leave like dust

For the whole of your life

you will be lost like a bird

filled with hunger and thirst

So be sure to hear the voices from within

because that's how the universe talk

Guiding you towards the homes and ways

Where you are meant to stay and walk.