Ruminations (Part Two): It's the Big Things
Last week’s post was about a Q&A session with students at F.I.T. & our conversation about my belief that the little things-the daily choices we make-are a determining factor in who we ultimately become.
We also talked about "The Big Things". Because the truth is that big, bad things happen; all the time. It is the rare individual who gets to glide through life untouched by sorrow; my own mother died forty years ago this month (get your mammograms, ladies!). But, as I explained, it is my belief that we all have the power to determine whether we walk through the fire, or end up in ruins.
I also admitted to the F.I.T. students that I have recently changed my outlook regarding which specific power we need to use to work through pain with the least amount of scarring.
In my mid-twenties I wrote a book. It was autobiographical fiction - more fiction than fact, but the following passage reflected my personal truth: "Yes, I have felt sorrow. But, I have never despaired. Bad things happen all the time, but that doesn’t mean that life can’t be good. It’s simply a matter of choosing to be happy. And if you don’t believe me, if you don’t think that happiness is a choice, then you have obviously never suffered and survived. Because anyone who has ever been trapped inside a tragedy knows that the only way to escape intact is to laugh – out loud & often.
I think that a person could suffer a lifetime of sorrows and still have a happy life, so long as they never stopped laughing." I have fervently clung to the belief that happiness is a choice my whole life.
It is only recently that I have come to understand that, while the sentiment remains exactly the same, I wasn't ever really talking about happiness. Happiness is too elusive, too random to be controlled. What I have been preaching my whole life is, actually, OPTIMISM.
Optimism is hopefulness & confidence about the future. And, that, I explained to the student who asked me how I managed set backs, is how you get through the pain to the other side.
Optimism & lots of laughter.
Choose Optimism & Humor & your mind can be your best friend, instead of your worst enemy.
